It felt like her body had turned into a black hole. 

Nothing came in. 

Nothing went out.

She couldn't feel her face, only a riptide of nausea that starts from the pit of her stomach and tore through her body. For a few moments, Starry couldn't process any sensory inputs - which was especially terrifying. It was like losing consciousness for a few seconds, even though she was standing and her eyes were wide open, staring at where Hoverstep started walking away again. It was like being a little filly again, lost in the grocery store in the cereal aisle and Starry couldn't find Natula... only somehow worse.

Where is she? 

What was she doing here? 

Who is she?

Starry looked around, and no matter where her eyes landed, there were only shapes and colors. She couldn't understand it. The colors around her and where was that buzzing sound coming from? The white noise was in her ears, and Starry knew that she was supposed to be doing something, but for the life of her, she could not remember.

She didn't know what she was supposed to be doing.

She felt... Helpless...

It only lasted as long as she could see Hoverstep, she could only feel the warmth returning to her snout when she saw him step into a house with a mare, smiling at him and kissing his cheek. Starry's legs felt weak, and her hind legs shook. 

The queasiness in her stomach started to grow stronger.

The sick was still there.

The feeling of being cornered like an animal was still in the pit of her stomach, and she could not see it getting better. Starry wanted to vomit, she wanted to run and hide and never see the world again, not a world where Hoverstep was kissing another mare.

The tears that stung her eyes only made things worse.

Starry wobbled, kneeling and pressing her nose to the ground, trying to gain some control in her life. She wanted the world around her to still. She wanted to curl into a ball and cry until she couldn't cry anymore. A heavy hoof settled on her shoulder and Starry glanced up, tears blurring her vision to the grey-coated pony in front of her.

She couldn't tell who they might be but leaned on them when they pulled her against their leg.

"Breathe-" The pony said, a stallion, she could tell by the voice.

But when she tried to breathe, she could only gasp for air, sobs choking her until she felt near faint.

"Hover-" She croaked out, coughing as the name tried to leave her throat.

Hoverstep had abandoned her.

He had fooled her.

He had made her lose everything.

She was alone.

"Breathe-" The stallion said again, sitting her up and pressing her head between her forelegs ", Just take a deep breath."

"I'm- I'm trying!" Starry gasped again, and suddenly the breaths came easily, she could feel the air being sucked into her lungs. A hoof wrapped around her stomach, and despite still struggling to see, she could see the movements. A wing lifting her and adjusting her on a broad back. Orange hair tickled the end of her nose, and the wing kept her firm on the broad back.

It felt like the times when her father had carried her home on her first day of school.

Starry felt her body relax before her mind, sinking into the warm fur.

Starry let out a shuttering sigh, brushing her cheek against the shoulder and wrapping her hooves around the neck. Her eyes clenched shut and she breathed, easier than before. The gasping breaths slowed and eased into a shuddering that shook her whole body.

Hover...

The resounding thought in her mind was of Hoverstep.

She opened her eyes, the grey coat lined with olive tones was familiar, but she was suddenly too tired to care about it. 

Starry closed her eyes again and felt herself fall into a restless sleep.

.     .     .

When Starry woke again, she was warm.

The blanket cocooned around her was wrapped as tightly as a bundle around a foal at night. She turned her head, trying to get a layout of where she was and how she had gotten there. Her head hurt, a thrumming headache at the back of her skull and the base of her horn. The smell of herbal tea in the air made her nose twitch, and her legs shifted under her, causing the blanket to tangle farther around her legs.

A weight pressed against her back, soothing warmth into her body and returning the feeling that she didn't realize she had lost. When Starry lifted her head, turning to see where the weight came from only to find a black cat resting on her back.

The cat looked up at her with searing amber eyes, its tail flicking from side to side as it purred against her back.

Starry smiled at the creature before noticing where she was again.

Back in the apartment complex where she had stayed the night, where she worked and lived. Starry shifted, jostling the black cat off her back and it looked indignantly at her before wandering deeper into the apartment. The mare pressed a hoof to her forehead, shaking the tired out of her eyes.

Seeing Hoverstep, here in Ponyville, was the last thing she had ever expected.

And the way that he had ignored her, the way he had spoken to her, the way he walked into the house of a mare who kissed him on the cheek with such loving eyes... That wasn't the Hoverstep that she knew. It wasn't the Hoverstep she had fallen in love with. Her eyes teared up again and Starry had to bury her face into the blanket.

"You're awake-" The voice of the stallion rang out and Starry could finally identify the source of the voice.

"Yes-" She spoke with a shuttering breath ", I- I'm so sorry..."

"Why are you sorry?" Stone River asked, holding a cup of tea in one hoof as he limped his way over to her.

"I- I didn't get the shopping done, and I froze and I- I'm so so sorry-" Starry felt tears stinging in her eyes once more ", I-I- I shouldn't have gotten like that- I don't know what happened-"

"You had a panic attack-" Stone River muttered, setting the teacup on the table next to her head ", I've seen it in the soldiers from the Royal Guard after botched missions."

"S-soldiers?" Starry stammered, lifting the teacup in her azure blue magic ", I- I wasn't a soldier..."

Stone River snorted slightly, taking a seat on the floor across from her and staring at her with his chocolate-colored eyes. Starry felt the urge to run and hide, not because she was afraid of this stallion, but because the truth had to come out. The truth of who she was and why she was here. The truth of why she dissolved into tears in the middle of the street.

The truth of who she had become.

Stone shifted, pressing his one good wing to his right side like a lopsided blanket over his body. Starry could see his face twisting into something between anger and sympathy, his fangs peeking over his lip.

"Then what was that about? Why did I find you panicking in the streets? Who is Hoverstep?"

The final question came like a knife into Starry's chest.

"Who are you?"