"That turkey almost done, Dad? I'm wasting away over here!"

Kaia laughed as her brother shouted at her father from the sofa. The two of them were underneath Bonnie's blanket by the fire, glasses of wine in hand and gifts strewn around the living room.

The presents Kaia had given Bonnie and her father had gone down a treat. Aberama loved his new coat and Bonnie was in awe at the watch she'd picked out for him, putting it on straight away.

Kaia had received a new suit from her father, knowing that she'd much prefer that than a new dress. Bonnie had gifted her some perfume and a red silk scarf that matched the colour of her favourite lipstick. Considering she thought the two men in her life were clueless, they'd actually impressed her this year with their presents.

They'd spent the morning exchanging gifts before going on a long walk around the fields behind their house. Bonnie had called in to his girlfriend's house to see her for a few hours while Aberama and Kaia had a drink in The Marquis. The three of them stopped off at the cemetery like they did every year, laying down a fresh bouquet of flowers before spending some time at their mother's grave.

Snow had continued to fall every single day since Calvin had left and Small Heath had never looked prettier. Instead of the black stained cobbles and grey smoke being puffed from the factory chimneys, a white blanket covered the streets and hung from the roofs of the terraced houses. Icicles were frosted to shop signs and lampposts that cast yellow shadows onto the snow when evening fell. The village felt warm and cosy, peaceful for once, reminding Kaia of everything she wanted in life.

The family headed back to their house after visiting the cemetery, cracking open a bottle of wine between them while Aberama cooked a Christmas dinner for the three of them.

"Won't be long, son. You couldn't run round next door and ask if they have any spare potatoes could you Bon? I didn't buy enough the other day."

"You must be joking, I've just got warm under here I'm not going back out there." Bonnie replied, pulling the blanket higher up underneath his chin and resting his head against the arm of the sofa.

Kaia sighed and rolled her eyes, pushing herself up, "I'll go, Dad."

"Thank you darling, be careful."

She nodded and put on her fur coat and new scarf, wrapping it tightly around her neck before putting on her boots and a pair of black leather gloves.

Snow was still falling when she stepped outside. The air was crisp and cold but not unwelcoming. There was no breeze and the snow fell gently onto her coat, crunching beneath her feet as she began to walk to the closest house.

The sound of a horse trotting through the snow made Kaia look up from the ground, pulling her coat up above her mouth to keep her face warm.

A beautiful white horse was parading down the street, Thomas Shelby dressed in a black coat and his cap, a pair of leather gloves like hers holding the reigns as he looked at Kaia from high above.

The sky was frosted white and Tommy looked like a knight as he rode towards her, the horse powering through the snow majestically like nothing Kaia had ever seen before. The street lamps were burning and there was nobody else outside with them.

"Merry Christmas, Kaia."

"Merry Christmas to you too, Tommy."

He stopped the horse beside her, a small smile on his lips that she thought might only have been there because it was Christmas Day.

"I'm heading out to the stables, care to join me?"

The way he looked sat on the horse made Kaia feel a way she didn't want to feel. He looked handsome and powerful, almost regal. His skin was pale but the cold had made his cheeks turn crimson. His lips were chapped and his eyes were hollow yet bluer than the water in the lake  behind her home that had frozen over.

She was frozen from the cold but her skin felt hot. Her heart was burning in the best way possible and as she looked up at him, she couldn't help but let her mind think back to the day he had her pinned against her kitchen wall with his lips against her neck.

"I, I can't I-"

"Oh come on," he said, tilting his head, "We won't be gone long."

She bit her lip, thinking for no longer than a few seconds before nodding her head. The two of them rode slowly through the rest of the village before they reached the stables not far away. It felt wrong for her to be clinging to his body like she was, like her hands didn't belong there. As much as it felt unnatural, she couldn't bring herself to let go and return home.

They stood at the side of the stables, watching the horse roam around the field. The snow had stopped falling now and the sun had broken through the clouds casting a yellow glow across the acres of fields ahead of them.

"Get anything nice for Christmas?" He asked her, leaning on the fence.

"This scarf from Bonnie." She replied, loosening it a little now the sun had come out.

He just nodded, "It's lovely. Anything from your boyfriend?"

Kaia turned to look at him, only his eyes stayed fixed on the horse.

"No," she said, "I said I didn't want anything."

Tommy chuckled.

"What?" She pried.

"Nothing," he shrugged, "I just think a man with as much wealth as Calvin Young would've bought his girlfriend a necklace or some flowers at the very least, don't you agree?"

Kaia stayed quiet and watched as a black horse emerged from the stables and galloped through the snow for the first time that day. She wasn't a particularly materialistic person and she much preferred giving gifts rather than receiving them, but the Sterling silver cuff links engraved with her initials she'd gifted Calvin started to make her wonder if he'd return the favour, even if she did say she didn't want anything.

"Are you happy with him?" Tommy broke the silence.

"Yes," Kaia replied, swallowing as she stole a sideways glance to check that he was still watching the horses and not her, "Happier than I've ever been."

"Then why do you look so miserable?"

"What?" She said again, furrowing her eyebrows at his question.

She was confused. Everybody had said to her how much happier she looked, how much more she smiled and how she was friendlier, more inviting and seemed to glow.

"The girl I met was the real you. The one that broke men's arms and stood on their necks with five inch stiletto heels. Not this version of you, the one that's polite and smiles all the time, that isn't you, is it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." She lied.

Kaia knew exactly what he was talking about. He wasn't wrong, she had changed. She felt like a totally different person now she was with Calvin, like she could be vulnerable and open with her emotions, like she could trust him and let her guard down. She felt more feminine around him, like the dresses and the curled hair suited their style as a couple more than a fitted suit and pin straight hair. The smiles were wider and her cheeks were brighter but her attitude was smoother, not as sharp as it once was.

"Yes you do." He looked at her that time, his eyes taking in every inch of her face. Her lips were pale and cold and he noticed the way she'd curled her hands into fists underneath the sleeves of her coat.

"Kaia Gold would never smile or laugh at people's jokes that aren't funny or let a man decide what to order for her at a restaurant. She isn't soft or wears her heart on her sleeve, and you know that."

"What do you want from me, Thomas? Can't you see I'm happy? I know I've changed, I know I'm not the same as I used to be but it's for the better, everyone says so."

Tommy stared at her, "Everyone might say so, but do you think so? Do you feel like yourself? Or do you feel like a different version of yourself that's been moulded to fit a lifestyle that you don't belong to?"

She scoffed, taken aback by his words, "Don't you remember it was you telling me that I didn't belong with someone that lived a life like yours? That I was worthy of more?"

Tommy laughed bluntly and shook his head, looking back out at the horses.

"I was wrong. I see you now and I just think, fuck," he sighed, "That isn't the girl I kissed, the one I wanted to protect and look after, the one I wanted to..."

He stopped speaking, sighing as he kicked the snow with the toe of his boot, his arms folded on the fence still.

"Wanted to what?" She asked, suddenly feeling a sickness rise from her stomach and into her heart.

Tommy shook his head, "It was a feeling, like a primal fucking instinct when I thought about you and when I saw you. And now..." he trailed off again, not being able to finish his sentence.

He began retracing their steps heading back in the direction of Small Heath, leaving fresh footprints beside their old ones.

Kaia followed him eagerly, "Now you what? Just spit it out, Tommy. Every time I see you you speak in this weird cryptic way that makes me not be able to stop thinking about you for days and it drives me insane because-"

Thomas kissed her. He grabbed her face, the feeling of cold leather against her cheeks made her body tense up as he pressed his lips against hers. They were rough and sore but she kissed back, not being able to fight the pull that was holding her body against his. Whatever the primal instinct he had mentioned before was the same feeling Kaia had in that moment. The morals and the sense of right and wrong had disappeared and she was left with nothing but the feeling of want as she kissed him in the snow.

"You feel it too," he said breathlessly, still holding her face in his hands, "Tell me you feel it, Kaia."

She gazed up at him, trying her best to think of something, anything else at all to break away from the feeling that had taken over her from deep in her bones. Only, she couldn't.

"I do."