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Chapter 42: Relinquishing Joy

Orion had been swept away the next morning before anyone even realized. Mica certainly wasn't informed and neither was Presley. Rather, they began scrambling around, making every guard in the palace look for him. That was when the first princess casually mentioned that he had gone abroad. She wasn't very shocked that they began screaming and yelling, telling her he wasn't well enough and that he needed protection. Still, she simply put up with it, knowing that her son was having the time of his life.

Haru had snuck him out early that morning, the both of them getting to talk a bit about electronics. And while the prince merely listened to what the brunette was saying, he was excited nonetheless to learn. That excitement continued when they met up with (Y/n), Kazuya, and Bastien, and began driving off palace grounds. The brunette was strangely considerate towards the boy when he began to feel immense fear. Orion trembled a bit at the thought of leaving the palace, but Haru just hugged him, saying nothing. It seemed to help a lot.

The orange-haired male continued to be scared of certain things. For instance, getting in a car was a first for him, and though he had left Valiende a handful of times, it was still intimidating. He was also lost when getting on the airplane and when the thing took off. The entire plane ride, he was terrified, but, for better or for worse, his lack of energy kicked in and he went to sleep. Bastien was confused at that, wondering if it was his nap time, too. In the end, the toddler decided to take a nap on his brother's lap.

The ride back to the main Akahito estate was not far whatsoever. They lived near the heart of the capital, meaning Orion only got to survey the wildly different city layout for a short time. That was probably for the best though, considering every time a car would honk - which was often - he would jolt. He was a bit more relieved when he saw they had arrived at their destination, especially since there were many trees around, unlike in the city. And though he probably expected to see more plants, he was still very curious about the mansion, especially when it was covered in snow.

One of the main butlers of the house stepped out of the neat line of servants to open the door for everyone. He paused when he noticed the orange-haired male. Of course, everyone had been informed he would be visiting, but it still was very shocking. There was no known instance of the prince ever leaving his country. The man decided to take it as an honor, being the first to welcome the boy to the estate.

"Ah, thank you so much!" Orion beamed, prompting all of the servants' hearts to flutter, "Please take care of me!"

Though at first nervous about hosting the precious prince, it became apparent he was a sweet boy. They were all determined to serve him to the best of their ability, but, at the time, the boy went around trying to introduce himself to everyone. Sooner or later, Haru grabbed him by the shoulders and started pushing him inside the house, noticing his nose was getting red from the cold. Once inside, he then began pouring blanket over blanket on top of the male before he collapsed on the floor from the weight, giving a small "oof".

"Alright, Haru. Let's ease up on the protectiveness. You should go see your mom."

The brunette perked up a bit, giving a hesitant look as if asking her for permission to go. In the end, even when she nodded, he waited a few seconds before kissing her appreciatively on the cheek and running off with Sona. Orion blushed at the display of affection before watching the male run off, Bastien in his arms. Kazuya then stepped up, narrowing his eyes somberly at his eldest before putting on a smile.

"Please make yourself at home, your highness. I'll have a few attendants bring your things to your room. You can choose any one of them to serve you primarily on this trip. I also have doctors on staff if you feel uncomfortable. But, if you need anything else, please come to me."

"That's nice of you, Mr. Akahito, but you're probably very busy, so I would feel bad about bothering you. Um, instead, would it be okay if I went to Miss Shiratori?"

The man paused. A flash of hesitance was visible through his eyes as he looked first to the boy and then to the girl he stared at. In truth, he did not like how close the two had gotten. However, it was not his place to say who should or should not loiter around the girl. If Haru nor her raised objections about him, he couldn't say anything either. Still, like everyone else, he dismissed the prince as an obstacle, if only because he was going to die soon. Like Haru, he had a soft spot for those that were ill. That worked out just perfectly for the male in question.

"If it makes you feel more comfortable, your highness. I'll leave you in her hands then."

The man left to greet his wife before heading out to the capital's presidential estate. He had only come home to see her. Otherwise, he would have departed from the airport. No one could say that Kazuya neglected his wife nor that he didn't love her. She was a big part of what held him together, and now that she was fading away slowly, cracks were beginning to form in him. That was why he was being opportunistic with the situation in Vethela. The girl then put her hand to her mouth as she suddenly thought of the man's eye. Eloise hadn't seen him like that yet. There were bound to be tears involved.

Orion watched the (h/c) haired girl carefully, scrutinizing every little gesture she made. Though she was leading him to his room, she was distracted, prompting him to frown and put his hands behind his back. When she still wouldn't snap out of it, he tripped, giving a small sound of worry before she quickly caught him. His cheeks flared red at the secure hold she had him in before she pulled him back up to his feet, placing the back of her hand to his forehead. He melted at that.

"You don't seem like you have a fever. Are you just clumsy?"

"No! No, I just - was just...distracted!"

"It's alright, you know. You just started walking for the first time in a while. It's normal to be disoriented."

"Really? I thought...," the male trailed off, turning the conversation, instead, to what he was curious about, "Is there something bothering you? I don't mean to pry, but if it's something I can help with, I'd love to take your mind off of it!"

"That's sweet, but this particular thing can't really be fixed."

"Does it have to do with Mister Haru's mother?"

The (h/c) haired girl avoided answering that, instead, talking to him about the mansion and its amenities. However, from that, the male was able to glean something, making a connection. He heard some gossip about the wife of Kazuya, but it never was complete. People said she was a recluse or that she was a snob, never showing herself to high society. Still, suddenly Haru's attitude to him began to make sense, because, from the look of it, just like him, the brunette's mother was deathly ill. (Y/n) just didn't say it out of consideration for the prince. He smiled a bit.

"This will be your room," she continued, walking into a very luxurious bedroom, "Kazuya only lets his most important guests stay in this room, so rest assured it is the highest quality. There's a private bathroom here for you with a bath, shower, and everything else. Here, there's a walk-in closet. If you click this button, the tv comes out of the wall. Otherwise, it's a nightlight. Over there is a living room you can hang out in and a balcony overlooking one of the pools. And, obviously, there will be people on staff for you around the clock. How do you like it?"

Orion could not deny the room was stunning. It was elegant, too, black and white with gold accents and marble all around. He didn't think anywhere else would have the luxury the Vethelan palace did, so he felt very at home. Still, as he looked across the hall, he could find no other rooms. Frowning, he thought a bit before darting his eyes away and giving a small whine only he could hear.

"Where is your room, Miss Shiratori?"

"Oh, guests stay in the emerald wing here in the west. Kazuya and his wife stay in the diamond wing in the south, and Haru, Bastien, and I stay in the jade wing in the east."

"So, you're on the other side of the house?"

"Well, yes, since - "

"Um!" the male interrupted, latching himself to the girl's arm and looking up with a pitiful gaze, "I want to stay with you! Please?"

Orion was given a strange look, especially since she hadn't expected him to object to the room. As he had said, it wasn't because the room was inferior. Rather, he probably felt lonely or attached. Still, it was Haru's home. He got to make the rules for things like that, especially in the jade wing. She could probably predict what he would say, especially considering that he prohibited any other males from staying in the wing. The girl didn't really think the prince would be an exception.

"You'd have to ask Haru."

The male nodded eagerly, hugging her arm tightly in joy. She hoped he wasn't mistaking her deferral as permission. If it was up to her, he could stay in a room there, but it wasn't, and even if she went behind Haru's back and told him he could, it meant nothing. The brunette could just as easily kick him out and send him back to the emerald wing. Still, he began humming in anticipation as they waited for the brunette.

Haru came back with a very strange mindset about him. Clearly insecure and scared, he was holding his arm tightly, casting a downwards gaze at the ground. Even when (Y/n) tried to talk to him, he was out of it, just lazily lying his head on her shoulder and giving a sigh. She understood. Things weren't going so well with his mother. He had always been told what she had was a fatal illness. Even with treatment, she wasn't able to live very long, unfortunately. It didn't matter how smart Haru was. He couldn't save her.

"We can talk about it later, okay?" the younger girl hummed, hugging him tightly.

The brunette huffed, but not because he was mad at her. He just didn't want to come to terms with the fact that he wouldn't be able to see his mother again. The only thing he knew how to do was deny it and bury himself in as much love as he could. That was why he had begun clinging to the (h/c) haired girl, murmuring that he wanted to sleep over with her that night and that he wanted to play games. She only told him they could do whatever he wanted, to which he squeezed a bit tighter.

"Uh, I'm sorry to interrupt, but," Orion paused, shyly kicking his feet, "I-I was just wondering...Oh, nevermind! This is a bad time! Um, can I help you with anything?!"

"No," Haru bluntly responded, continuing to hide his face.

"But you...look so sad. I want...to make you feel better. Would it be okay if I played games with you?! I've never done it before and I definitely won't be as good as you, but I heard you like them, so if it makes you happy, then I would love to - "

"He's just overwhelmed. I'll take care of him," (Y/n) sighed, watching the prince whimper a little bit, "You should stay here. I'll make sure there are at least four people outside your room at all times. You won't be lonely or anything, and you can see us as soon as morning, so - "

"But I want to stay with Mister Haru!" A lie. "If I'm near you two, then I can make sure he's okay!" Another lie. "Really, that's all I want." A third lie. "Can't I...?"

Haru glanced up at the prince, his eyes softening. Inside, he felt angry and tormented, and nothing around him seemed fair. It wasn't alright his mother would die. Nothing would replace her. He had tried to do everything he could, but even the biotech genius Fenhua Akiyama couldn't help him. If he had known that his mother was allergic to the medication, he would have studied harder. If he had known he only had a few years with her, he would have gone into medicine, not technology. And if he had known he would be so sad, he would have spent more time with her instead of going to school.

And, yet, when he looked at Orion, despite the fact that the boy was in no way related to her, he felt like he had a chance to redeem himself. He wasn't his mother, but he couldn't really tell the difference. All he saw was someone else suffering from a long-term illness; someone that would die within the year. Thoughts ran through the brunette's head about killing the male to put him out of his misery, but (Y/n) had long since taught him not to act on those thoughts. Instead, he wanted to cure him, and, if not that, he definitely wanted him to be happy. (Haru didn't seem to realize his mother, despite her fast-approaching death, was happy. He just figured, since he wasn't happy, she wasn't either).

"You can have the room across from me," Haru mumbled, tugging the boy along behind him.

Orion got his way. It wasn't surprising, especially not for him, but it was for the (h/c) haired girl. The prince, true to the brunette's word, was placed in the room across from them. It was perhaps not as luxurious as the other room they gave to their most important guests, but it wasn't lacking much. It was a bit smaller but with similar amenities, allowing the prince to feel at ease, especially since they were right across from him.

Of course, that night, after dinner, all three of them gathered in Haru's room. He gave the controllers to (Y/n) and Orion before he flopped down on the younger girl's lap. It was surprising to see, but the brunette didn't insist on playing. Even when she offered him the controller to play with Orion, he didn't take it. She didn't see, but the reason was, when she did so, the prince's smile fell, replaced with one of worry and disappointment. But, when he rejected it, he began to smile again. Haru fixated his eyes on the boy, taking some satisfaction from his smile. He just wanted him to be happy, and, if it took playing with (Y/n) to be happy, so be it.

When the boy left, the brunette tried to have him stay, noticing he gave a frown when the younger girl said he should get some sleep. He offered to give the boy the bed while he and (Y/n) slept on a comforter, but, in the end, she rejected that idea. Haru's heart dropped as Orion left, the image of his frown prominent in the boy's mind. He began to shiver a bit as she sat him down on the bed, wondering if he was going to fail the prince, too.

"Come here," the girl sighed, pulling the male into a warm hug, only for him to shove his face into her chest, "T-That's...Well, fine. O-Okay! No squeezing!"

Haru gave a huff and set his hand down from her chest, instead nuzzling further into her. She blushed and considered smacking him, ultimately deciding against it. The brunette then moved his hand to her thighs, only for her to grab at his cheeks and pull him up to stare at her. He sniffled a bit and began to cry. At first, she didn't understand the connection, but, soon after, it began to make a bit more sense.

"W-We have to have a baby," he cried, gripping at her desperately, "Right now! It has to be...We need a baby! P-Please! (Y/n)...please." A pause as he broke down further. "I'll do whatever you want. Y-You can...You can hit me or yell at me or even take my company! J-Just..."

"I'm not going to have a baby with you. I told you. Maybe when we're older, but it can't be right now. You know that."

"No! It has to be r-right now! We need one! We can't wait any longer or else...Please! I've been good, haven't I?! I've been listening to you and being nice! I wait five seconds every time I want to do something! I'm protecting you just like you wanted! A-And - "

"I appreciate that, Haru. You're doing such a good job. I'm proud. But I never promised doing that would let you have one with me. That's my decision, not yours."

"Then how do I change your mind?!" the male snapped, eyes filling with rage before becoming filled back up with desperation, tears streaming down his cheeks violently.

"You don't. Only I do that."

"We can make a contract again! Just like we did before! You give me a baby and I-I...what do I...You want something, don't you?!"

"Right now, all I want is for you to be okay."

"If you give me a baby, I'll be okay! That's all you have to do! I'll be happy if you do that!"

"I don't think you will be. The answer is no, Haru."

"Then what if I break our contract?! You can be free! I won't kidnap you again and I won't hold you against your will and I won't even...I won't even look for you if you don't want me to!"

A moment passed of pure shock. Haru would have never offered something like that. He did whatever he could to monopolize her and keep her to himself. It had been a constant source of conflict for them, particularly because she loved her independence and he was terrified of it. And though they had worked out an even compromise for the both of them, he still loved her dearly, more than he could ever express. So to hear he was willing to let her go permanently...Something was wrong.

"If you want a baby that badly, why don't you find someone else?"

"I want to! I want to so bad, but I can't!" the male cried, clinging onto her like she was going to run away before he finished pleading, "I can't do it with anyone else but you! I love you, (Y/n)! So it has to be you! You and me!"

"I just... If you want a sibling, you have Bastien. And you have - "

"It has to be mine, so - "

"Why?! I don't know why you think you do, but you don't want a child, Haru!"

"But mère does! And moms aren't supposed to die! So, I have to have a baby so she can be a grandmère and then...and then..."

"And then what? Is it only okay if she dies when she's a grandmother?"

"No. No! B-But that's how it's supposed to be! I just want mère to be happy, so if I just have a baby, then - "

"Haru." A pause as the girl pulled the male in for a long kiss, "You and Bastien have always been enough for her. Has she ever told you she wanted you to have a child?"

"She said she wanted to see me grow up! And to grow up, you have to have a baby."

"No, you don't. You still grow up even without one, and, if you do have one, there's no guarantee you will grow up. Trust me. She just meant she wanted to be with you a little longer because she loves you."

"B-But she can't! She's going to leave me!"

"Then spend as much time with her as you can. Give her gifts, shower her with love, and do what she wants to do. Don't assume. Just ask her. It will be hard when she dies, but you have to make sure you won't have any regrets."

Haru broke down again. He jumped into the girl's arms and began to cry about how it wasn't fair and how she didn't deserve it; that he would rather take her place. He went on and on about how he was a bad son and how he should have been smarter. Most of it was ridiculous to her. She knew him to be the smartest person she knew, but he didn't understand when she told him he couldn't be perfect at everything and that not everything could go perfectly, even if he was.

In the end, he still didn't want to accept what was happening. He clung onto the hope that, somehow, some way, his mother would recover, but, at the very least, (Y/n) got it through to him that he didn't need a baby. He seemed to vaguely let go of that necessity. And though he still fell asleep crying and whimpering, because she was there, he found some small semblance of comfort. If he lost his mother, he didn't know what he would do without (Y/n) either.

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