So it's all a mumble-jumble, isn't it? It's a big mashed up bowl of all things bad and terrible, including tiny pieces of lego and pickles and mushrooms and olives.

You're probably wondering now about how I actually genuinely feel about you.

And, here's the answer; cue drum roll..

I have absolutely zero fucking idea.

I'm not sure if I love you. Or maybe, I'm scared of not loving you, and that's why I'm so stuck?

Don't get me wrong, I'm moving on, slowly. It's obviously hard, but I'm coming along. Quietly just trying to wrap my head around it all.

So you'll be happy to hear that I am in fact, doing my very best to get it over with.

The fact that you have someone on that account, it makes me feel uncomfortable, sure, but I guess it's helping me to take a step forward.

So you see, I miss you.

But not just romantically.

I miss having you as a friend. I miss talking to you about school and friends and tea. I miss there not being a big fat barrier between us.

Which there now is.