*Pilar*
I am kinda just standing there.. what can I say ? What is Zac thinking about me now.. dammit he like just saw my boobs.. I am not sure how I feel about that to be honest. Nick and Nina has kinda pulled Matt aside to have a talk with him.. so me and Zac is alone.

"You had no idea it was him did you ? I mean you thought you send those pictures to a stranger right ?" His voice is soft.

"Of course.. I would never have.. if I knew.. I would have told Emilia right away that he was a bastard.. arg I can't believe he.. I feel sick". The idea that he has been looking at me while he .. pleasured himself.. I really hate that.

Zac is chewing his lip. "Can I ask you something ?" I nod. "Why are you doing this ? Selling pictures like that to men.. because he is not the only one is he ?"

"No he isn't". It makes no sense to lie about that. "And why shouldn't I ? Men are .. in general.. pathetic lowlifes who is only out to use women.. why not use them instead ?"

"Oh sweetie.. can't you see that you so isn't you using them.. it's allowing them to use you.. it's degrading yourself for money". He sounds kinda sad.. but his words are like daggers in my chest.

I grind my teeth.. he is a man, of course he is seeing it that way. I am the wrong one. "Well money is important.. they pay me a lot.. and by the way it's none of your business what I do".

"Dammit Pilar.. do not do this". The level of his voice makes me take a step back, his voice going soft again. "Please do not pull up those walls on me.. I just want to help you".

"Well you're not really helping.. you are just judging me.. so typical men.. they are the ones watching porn, paying big money for pictures of women in their underwear.. but the woman she is the one who is cheap and dirty right ?" The thought that he sees me like that is ripping at my very soul.. but all I can do is play hard and pull up my facade.

He takes my hand. "Oh darling.. I would never think that.. especially not about you.. but I can't bear to think that you see yourself as .. not worth more than that".

"It's my life Zac.. Maybe I have no problem doing it.. I have nothing to be embarrassed about do I". To be honest I don't know why I insist on fighting him.

"Pilar.. this stops now.. I won't let you sell out yourself like that.. and no you have nothing to be embarrassed about.. but.. no.. just no". He sounds slightly agitated.

I huff, who the hell do he think he is ? Coming here and tell me what to do.. I swear that sometimes he is such a.. man. "Says who ? How dare you think you can tell me what to do ?"

"And why do you insist on doing this .. do you like the thought of men looking at you.. fantasising about touching you as they.. why ?" His voice is raised in a way I have never heard from him before.

*Zac*
"Have you considered that I have no fucking choice ? I have no real education.. my career never came further than a couple of commercials and b level modelling.. my mother is sick and can't work and she needs to care for my brother.. he is.. mentally handicapped.. they need me.. they need the money.. I can't earn them in another way.. unless I go sell myself on the street". Her voice is slightly shaking.

I grab her hand again. "I am sorry darling.. I had no idea you had that pressure on you.. it shouldn't be like that".

She looks at my hand holding hers, but at least she does not pull it away. "But that is how it is Zac.. and no I do not enjoy it .. but it's easy and I feel in control".

"But is it really worth it ? Giving up part of you, for money". To be honest I am of course worried about how it can mentally affect her in the long run.. but I also can't stand the idea of other men looking at her perfect body.. imagining touching her.. Being with her.. no it's eating at me in a way that makes me go stir crazy and wanting to go for a long run.. and I hate running.

"I have no choice". She tries to pull her hand from my grasp but I am not letting go. "We are not all rich and famous you know".

I close my eyes for a second. "So.. how much money is it ? How much do you make from this.. what do you need to .. make it work ?"

"Uhm it depends.. two-three thousand dollars most months.. what does that matter ?" She looks slightly confused.

"I .. can't let you continue doing this..". She is about to say something, but I hold up my hand. "I understand you need the money.. so I am gonna give you them.. three.. no let's say four thousand every month.. then you are sure not to.. need more.. and you will stop with the photos and stuff.. okay ?"

She is shaking her head. "Zac.. I know you mean well.. But I can't do that.. and .. isn't that kinda the same.. Selling myself out".

"I do not expect anything in return darling.. I just want to help". I can see that she is about to refuse again.. And I can't claim not to understand her, so I quickly say. "If it makes you feel better.. I can find like a job for you.. something I need done that I can pay you to do.. would you accept that ?"

"Why do you even care what I do ? Why does it matter how I make my money ?" She still look uncertain. "I am not a charity case Zac.. some pathetic little girl to be rescued so you can feel good".

Why does she have to be so damn stubborn ? She just know how to push my buttons in just about every damn way. "Because I like you okay ? I like you and I do not want other men to be.. is it that hard to understand ?"

"Oh !" She just stare at me and part of me want so badly to kiss her, but I also know that it's not the right time to do it and she would just misunderstand. "So.. what is it you want me to do ? For the money I mean.. it has to be something real Zac".

I think for a moment.. I would honestly happily just give her the money if she would stop doing it, but she needs to buy into this and not feel she owe me anything. "Hmm you are a model.. you have done commercials.. and you are in great shape.. we could use a female model for flowsupps.. like doing workout on lives and pictures and stuff.. so women feel they can do this too.. Maybe for wyldwood too.. would that be okay ?"

"So.. you can take pictures and video of me.. but no one else can ?" She cocks one eyebrow, but I recognise the teasing tone in her voice.

"I think that sounds very fair". My hands grab her waist, slowly pulling her to me. "So ready to be mine.. my model I mean ?"

Her hands go to my chest, resting lightly there. "Okay.. but this need to be for real Zac.. no playing around.. I mean I want to do the work.. I expect you to do too".

Why do I suddenly feel this is not only about the money and modelling anymore. "I assure you darling, I am fully committed to making this.. collaboration work.. in the long run that is.. so no straying right.. to other brands or if someone offers you big money".

"I promise.. no more.. of that". She bites her lips softly. "I am all yours.. for the model work I mean".

My heart is pounding like crazy and I know I am going to kiss her, I just hope it won't end with me getting slapped or something.. but her smile kinda tells me I can do it.. so I slowly lean closer.

"Sorry has anyone seen my laptop ?" Matt's voice suddenly sound next to us and to be honest I kinda want to strangle him when Pilar quickly pull away from me.

To be honest Matt is not on my like list right now.. the only reason I have not asked him to leave is my respect for Nick and because I think Emilia needs time to figure out what she wants to do..I bend down and pick up the laptop, almost showing it in his face. "Here you go..".

"Thanks.. I.. I think I'll just go to my tent now". He cradles the laptop to his chest.

I am not sure what possesses me, but I point to his laptop. "Those pictures of Pilar.. they better be gone from every device you own within five minutes.. every single one of them.. is that clear ?"

"Yeah.. totally clear". He glance at Pilar once, then scuttles off.

"Oh wow.. jealous much ?" Her hands is on her hips, as she looks at me, and I sigh, knowing it won't happen tonight.. her walls back up.

I shake my head.. then sigh.. I might as well be honest with her. "Okay yeah.. I do not like the idea of him seeing more of you than I can.. okay ? Also wouldn't you want those picture gone ?"

"You are right.. of course I do". She steps up, ghosting her lips softly over mine and I have to fight with every fiber in my body not to grab her. "Thanks Zac.. for everything.. I think I need to sleep now.. see you tomorrow".

"Sweet dreams.. see you tomorrow". I sigh as I watch her walk away.. yup she is both perfect and all kinds of wrong for me.. it won't be easy.. but I am not one to pick easy.. never was.