IN MY TIME OF DYING.

02. DUE : grey skies to match the (almost) bloody world (n.e)

The Cullen's were a thing of beauty and Bella had been finally graced with their presence during lunch. Everything had started like normal with Jessica's insistent chatter and Angela's talk of the school editorial, but then the Cullen's made their way into the cafeteria.

Like everyone else at the school, Bella was immediately drawn the the perfectly pale group. Cecilia had chosen to stay out of their conversation, simply staring at the blonde girl who seemed to glide across the cafeteria floor with such grace that it should've been impossible.

The moment Bella asked who they were, it seemed like Angela and Jessica had no filter on their mouths. Every word after that question was spoken about the mysterious group of teens.

Cecilia chose to ignore their chatter. Instead, she mindlessly played with her food, picking it up on the fork and dropping it down with a look of disgust. As she looked up from her messy tray with a small sneer, Cecilia saw that Bella was vaguely interested in a popular topic known as the Cullen's. Angela's chatter was persistent, especially when it came to the Cullens and as she spoke, said group seemed to dance through the door and into the cafeteria.

"Yeah, 'cause they're all together... Like together together," Angela explained, leaning in closer to Bella. "Well, everyone except Emmett and Rosalie. The blond girl, that's Rosalie, and the big dark-haired guy, Emmett..."

"Cecilia has a thing for Rosalie but I'm pretty sure she's going to end up with Emmett." Jessica cut in, ignoring the gaping look that Cecilia sent her way. If looks could kill then Jessica would've been buried six feet under years before Bella even came to Forks.

"Jess! Who knows, maybe there's a chance she swings for both teams." Cecilia mumbled, glaring at the girl as she sunk lower into her plastic chair with a splotchy pink tinging her cheeks. She was already regretting sitting with her group, but now there was no where for her to go. Cecilia was stuck listening to the same crap she had been hearing for the past two years.

Jessica gave her a sarcastic smile, taking her eyes away from the blonde goddess and tall, dark, and broody. "Let me know when hell freezes over, then we'll set you and Rosalie up."

A scoff left her mouth. "You and I know that I'll be long dead before that."

"And... Okay." Jessica looked back at the door where two more people were gliding in. It was unfair how perfect they all seemed to be, and Cecilia envied that about them. "The little dark-haired girl is Alice... She's really weird. And... She's with Jasper, the blonde one, who looks like he's in pain. Dr.Cullen is like this foster dad-slash-match maker..."

Cecilia let her eyes float to the table across the cafeteria where Rosalie and Emmett were currently waiting for their other two siblings. They all seemed to be flawless and perfect, and Cecilia hated that. But as much as she hated them, she couldn't find it in her heart to actually hate them - especially Rosalie. That girl was just so far out of reach, and she was struggling

"Maybe he'll adopt me." Angela sighed dreamily causing Cecilia to turn her attention back to the table.

Bella's attention however, was focused on the last of the seemingly perfect group who just lingered outside, gliding past the windows and into the large room. "Who's he?"

She watched as Jessica tensed a bit. Edward was always a touchy subject considering half the population of girls in their school had at least a minor crush on him - Jessica included. "That's Edward Cullen... He's totally gorgeous, obviously. But apparently nobody here is good enough for him." Jessica started trailing off, the tension in the air rising with each word as Edward walked past them toward his siblings, "like I care... You know. So... Yeah... Seriously, don't waste your time..."

Bella looked over her shoulder at the group on the other side of the table. She seemed transfixed on the table, staring at them with an air of curiosity. "I wasn't planning on it," Bella mumbled, but her eyes only briefly left the Cullen's table before returning right back at it.

One look and Cecilia knew Bella was already in too deep.

Cecilia sighed, dragging her own attention to the sad excuse of a lunch that sat in front of her. She picked up her fork and messed with the food once again as her friends chatted on. There was nothing left for Cecilia to do but wait. She sure as hell wasn't going to eat the foot on her plate, so for the time until she was to be picked up, she was stuck.

Minutes began to feel like they had turned from sixty seconds to sixty minutes. The plastic chair underneath her began to hurt no matter how much she tried to wiggle for comfort, and Cecilia found herself passing the time by glancing at others around the cafeteria. Everyone seemed to be chatting away, bright smiles plastered on their faces as they ate.

It wasn't long before she found herself subconsciously looking at a certain blonde. As if the girl could feel Cecilia's eyes on her, she turned to look at the brunette who seemed mortified to be caught. She could feel her cheeks turn a splotchy pink, and the buzz of her phone seemed to drag her terrified eyes away from the other girl's gaze.

For once she could thank her mom for texting her during the day. Cecilia would've been petrified if that text hadn't saved her from Rosalie's surprised gaze.

from mom;
hurry up, don't want to be late!!!

Quickly typing a reply back, Cecilia sighed and looked back at her friends, ignoring the way her cheeks still burned. "Look, guys, I have to go. Wish me luck."

Cecilia stood, throwing her backpack over her shoulder and grabbing the lunch tray of food she definitely would never eat. She gave Bella a small smile, and turned to her friends who seemed to know why she was leaving by the looks on their faces. Bella, however, was confused as to why one of her sanest friends was leaving.

"Good luck, hope everything's clear," Angela gave her a reassuring smile and a thumbs up which made Cecilia laugh a bit.

"Yeah, yeah me too." Cecilia turned, ignoring the insistent feeling of eyes piercing the back of her head.

____

The visit was exactly like any other visit she had. She'd sit on the uncomfortable sanitary plastic and wait for them to give her more and more tests. So far, Cecilia had been mostly in the clear, and she'd love for it to stay that way. At least her results had come back okay, and Dr.Cullen sent her off with no more than a warning to be careful around town and that she was still in the clear.

Cecilia thought about his words later that night. What did she have to be careful from? There was nothing completely dangerous lurking around the boring town of Forks, Washington. Her mind reeled back to all the animal attacks that had recently occurred but there was nothing more than that.

Like every night, just in case things would start to go horribly wrong, Cecilia went through her mental list, checking over each and every name of the people she was closest to. Her mother, father, Jess, Mike, Angela, Eric, Bella, Dr.Cullen, and maybe even Rosalie. Everyone seemed to be accounted for. No one was forgotten and she was still in the clear.

After every hospital visit, Cecilia would find herself staring at everyone with such an intensity that it probably freaked them out. She wanted to remember each and every detail of their faces, the slopes of their noses, the color of their eyes, and the upturns of their lips.

Bella had even asked why she was looking at her so weirdly but Cecilia just shook her head and changed the subject. Her friend didn't need to know about it yet. Of course, Cecilia hadn't missed the concerned looks from Mike, Angela, and even Jessica. They were worried for her. They knew.

They were worried.

After each test they'd be even more worried for her until she told them the results were clear. Then it would be back to everything that was normal and sane.

Within a matter of a few days, Cecilia had managed to hang out with Bella twice who told her about the Cullen boy that ran from her like the plague, and keep up with Jessica and Angela when they went shopping. She even found the time to hang out with Mike and Eric before they'd have to split to go do whatever after school activities they had.

Everything was all normal at school and among friends, but I'm the privacy of her own home Cecilia would always repeat the list. It was the only thing she could do to stay sane.

The next day Cecilia found herself staring at the angelic blonde who was calmly reading the wrinkled pages of her book. And the day after that, she found herself doing the exact same thing. The blonde didn't seem to notice or care, and it wasn't until the third day did she actually mention Cecilia's weird behavior.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she spoke, her harsh tone bleeding through every syllable. And though her tone was harsh, Cecilia could tell the girl wasn't as bothered with her as she let on. The silence of the classroom was broken and everyone turned to look at their table with curious eyes.

Cecilia was shocked to say the least. She snapped out of her stupor, flailing in her seat at the girl's sudden attention. Immediately, she could feel the warm blush that spread across her cheeks as she stared at the girl, ignoring the others looks. "Huh?"

"Why are you staring? You're supposed to be reading." Rosalie glanced down at the book that was held limply in her hand and then back at Cecilia, her eyes narrowed.

She shook her head, staring at her lap trying to avoid the prying eyes of the girl she had been staring at. Maybe it could've been a little less awkward, but Cecilia was glad that the class' attention had gone back to whatever they were doing before. "Nothing. It doesn't matter."

Rosalie stared at her dubiously. "Are you sure about that?"

"Well, it wouldn't make any sense to you," Cecilia replied, shaking her head slightly. No one would really understand what she was going through and she sure as hell wouldn't tell her all time crush about it. It was embarrassing enough that she had caught her standing. If Rosalie knew the truth, she'd be disgusted and leave Cecilia to drown in the depths of the social ladder.

"Try me," she challenged, the look on her face showing determination. Her brows were set in a straight line, but by the rise in the corner of her lips, Cecilia could tell she was enjoying the little mystery. Too bad for her because that mystery would stay with her until she was lying on her death bed.

"Just... forget about it. Okay?" Cecilia muttered, lifting her book to hide the embarrassment written all over her face.

"Okay, then we better talk about Romeo and Juliet before Ms.Atkins kills us," Rosalie said, before muttering words under her breath as she lifted up her copy of the book. Cecilia could barely make them out, but what she could hear sounded like "I'd rather not almost die a second time."

Cecilia couldn't help but let her mind trail off, eyes growing comically wide as she thought about all the possibilities those words held. She thought about the fact that all good things must come to an end. The hero dies in the hands of their first and only love. The hero's demise in the eyes of another. Maybe Rosalie was the hero, and Cecilia was just another one of her devotees. Maybe Rosalie had found her other. Maybe Emmett was the only one for Rosalie and Cecilia was just a silly girl with a giant sense of unrequited love.

"Yeah, uh, here's one..." Cecilia let herself trail off before she spoke the words that made her want to crawl into her sweatshirt and never come back out. "Do you believe in love at first sight? I think this book shows that but, you know, it doesn't end very well."

The reaction Cecilia got from the girl was not one she was expecting. She was expecting maybe a frown, or the furrow of her brows and a tilt in her head. No, that's not what she got. Surprisingly, Rosalie flashed her a small smile; it was the prettiest smile Cecilia had ever seen and it was something she had never seen the girl do before. It was just so unlike her. And Cecilia loved it.

____

Stepping outside into the cloudy grey that was Forks, Cecilia ignored the laughter of her friends from behind. She stared up at the sky, bag clung tightly over her shoulder as she just stared. It was nice to be outside. For once the grey skies didn't bother her. The light splatter of rain across the bridge of her nose was soothing. For once she didn't care about the frizzy hair or the wet clothes that would cling to her body. She just wanted to escape their laughter.

Immediately, her eyes searched for the cars that she knew would always be there. Right in the front of the lot stood Rosalie with Emmett, the two quietly talking about who knows what, sucking up each other's attention. God, how she wished that was her. But it was nothing more than a mere dream; a fantasy that had yet to actually become a reality.

How she wanted just to desperately curl up into a ball underneath her covers and not to come out until she's officially dead. It was a mistake to tell Andrea and Jessica about what had happened during English. It would've been even more of a mistake to tell them exactly why she was staring at the girl. Sure, she had managed to hold a conversation with a girl who was not a part of her friend group, but it still didn't take away the fact that she was still socially inept.

Their shrill laughter covered the panicked screams and squeal of tires against the tarred road. The screams were the first thing that brought her attention to the crash not one hundred feet away. The next thing she heard was the crunch of metal against something and she looked to see a big black van stopped not even two feet away from Bella's red truck.

Before she could register what was happening, Cecilia abandoned her spot with Jessica and Angela, running over to her friend. It looked like Bella could've been crushed by the van by judging how close the two cars were together. Cecilia hoped the poor girl wasn't hurt and suffering some major injury due to Tyler's stupidity.

Her heart was pounding so fast it was like a jackhammer was drilling into her chest. She was afraid of what she would see behind that van. A crowd had already started to form around the accident, and Cecilia, despite her thin frame, started to push her way to the front. With each step closer, Cecilia really hoped that there was no blood.

She had been mentally preparing herself for the worst so when she found Bella unharmed on the ground it was like a giant weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Immediately, Cecilia rushed to the girl asking if she was okay. The pale girl only nodded.

"Bella, I'm so sorry... I panicked." Tyler spoke up from the passenger seat of the car, worry creasing his face with lines. He had almost hit Bella and Cecilia found herself wanting to punch the guy right in the face. She gave the guy a harsh glare. It was one that said back off, you've done enough damage.

People were already talking on the phone, rushing their words. It was already making Cecilia's head spin and she wasn't the one who almost got hit by a car. With as much force as she could, Cecilia pushed through the crowds and made her way toward a worried Jessica and Angela whose phones were gripped tightly in their hands, ready to call an ambulance.

She turned to Bella who still hadn't spoken, eyes wide and mouth open in shock. "I'm going to take you to the hospital, okay?"

Bella's eyes found hers and she swallowed thickly. Another nod. There was no room for words when all that could be thought of was her own demise.

"It's okay, guys. I'll take her there. I have to go to the hospital anyway." Both their mouths snapped shut and they nodded in understanding. Cecilia lightly gripped Bella's arm again, leading the poor girl away from all the wandering eyes that found themselves staring at the two.

She guided Bella to her small Toyota, helping the shaky girl get into the car before she dropped her bag off in the back and rushed to the driver's seat.

____

The ride to the hospital was silent; the two of them didn't dare speak to the other. Almost dying could do that to a girl. Cecilia kept her eyes on the road, watching the rain fall as she held a tight grip on the wheel. A shuddering breath escaped her mouth as she glanced at the girl once again. Bella wasn't paying attention too anything, only staring out at the passing trees in the distance.

Green smothered their view for what seemed like forever, and the grey sky began to become patchy, leaving behind small traces of sunlight. It was beautiful - breathtaking even - but it was the worst time to be beautiful. There was no beauty in the thought of death so Cecilia took her eyes away from the verdant of her town. There was no beauty in the thought of death.

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[word count: 3095]

Thank you guys so much for over 2k reads (I am totally freaking out about this rn) and over 200 votes! How'd you guys like the chapter?

Dedicated to Rachel who I hope is feeling better now, and I planned to post this sooner but oh well. Rach, I hope you're okay! :)