Title: You said Forever and Always by lostlovefairy
Source: Feedback request
Genre: General Fiction
Subgenres: Mental Health, Romance
Mature: Y (domestic abuse, dubious consent, eating disorder, explicit sexual content, infidelity, medical depictions, mental health issues, miscarriage, physical abuse, religion, sexual abuse, sexual assault, strong profanity, suicidal ideation, trauma, mentions of alcohol, smoking, and substance abuse)
LGBTQIAP+: N
Status: Complete
First impressions: 38/40
Digging deeper: 97/100
Final thoughts: Complete

Clicking the "External Link" button below the "Continue to next part" button will take you straight to the book, or click the link in the inline comments here. → 

*****

Note: This is a difficult story to read, but the depictions of trauma after abuse, victim mentality, unconditional love, and the journey to healing are realistic and beautiful. The tasteful handling of Naina's past relationship with Advik and the bond she forms with her new husband, Zayne, sets this apart from stories that romanticize sexual violence and take every opportunity to insert smut. I don't like to read sexually explicit content because it's usually meaningless porn meant only to stimulate the reader, but after the abuse Naina suffered, the sexual aspect of her marriage is integral to the story and meaningful. It shows how she's recovering from the past and growing closer to Zayne, and it's written for the characters, not the reader, so the emotional details are much more descriptive than the physical details.

This isn't a story for everybody, but for those who can handle the subject matter, I strongly recommend checking it out. Please keep in mind, however, that the author took a huge risk, emotionally and mentally, writing and publishing it. The characters are flawed, and while comments and constructive criticism are always appreciated, hate and verbal attacks are not.

*****

First impressions: 38/40

Title: 9/10
I love the title, because it invokes a sense of loss and heartbreak, along with the concept of marriage as a permanent union. My only nitpicky thing is that I'd capitalize the first letter of "Said."

Addendum: After reading the entire book, I understand why you didn't capitalize "Said," so I guess it's just a stylistic choice. If it were me, I'd capitalize it, but it's fine to stay as is, too.

Story description: 9/10
The content of this blurb is great. It's not heavy on too much information, simply introducing the three members of the love triangle and the basic plot conflicts and ending with provocative questions and statements. I don't think you need the divider between the first and second parts of the blurb, though. I think they flow together really well, and the dividers feel too sharp for this soft, emotionally intense story. That's just me, anyway. And I'm not one who typically likes quotes or story excerpts in the blurb either, but the one you include at the very end is short and enhances the mood of emotional pain, so it's fine.

Cover: 10/10
This is a gorgeous cover. Showing the couple standing in front of a mirror allows the reader to see his arm around her, supporting her and holding her close, while in the mirror itself, we see them wearing neutral expressions, not smiling or frowning. It seems like there's some fuzziness or distortion in her reflection, and then there's the cracked section at the top, covering a bit of each of their foreheads, where we see her reflection with another man at her side. There's so much depth going on here in all the imagery. Your text placement, font choice, sizing, and color are all perfect, and the text is clearly visible from the title page as well. You and ahavaenoch nailed this.

First chapter (and everything that came before it): 10/10
Author's note: I don't think you had the section about domestic abuse before, or maybe it just didn't stand out to me until I read way too many "romance" books full of toxic, abusive relationships, but I'm actually going to drop the link to this chapter in the section of my SPAG book where I go over Wattpad's Content Guidelines, because this is such great information for victims. I know you've said you'll replace this with an actual prologue later, but I would strongly recommend just adding a new chapter for the prologue and leaving this as is.

Chapter 1: This chapter always hits so hard. You do a great job of bringing Naina to life for the reader and bringing the reader into her experience, so we get to feel all the turbulent emotions she experiences as she struggles to move on from her past abusive relationship. It's such a sad, heartbreaking wedding. We don't know Zayne too well yet, but he seems like a nice, stand-up guy at this point, and he's already respecting her boundaries, which is something she probably hasn't experienced for a while (if ever). I understand her sister's desire to cheer her up, but trauma isn't that easy to get rid of, and simplifying the situation to, "Well, just forget Advik and sleep with Zayne" isn't helpful.

There are no grammatical errors that I could find, and your descriptive detail is wonderful, as is your dialogue. Each character you've introduced so far is a unique, distinct, realistic entity, even the ones we haven't personally met, like Advik and Tara. And for anybody who read the blurb and author's note and still isn't sure if they can handle this book, this first chapter gives a good taste of what to expect. This will not be an easy read (emotionally speaking), but it's an important story that needs to be told, and I hope it brings healing for victims of domestic abuse.

*****

Digging deeper: 97/100

Cover & title: 9/10
See "First Impressions" feedback.

Story description: 4/5
See "First Impressions" feedback.

Grammar & voice: 19/20
Grammatical errors are extremely rare, and you continue writing in such a way that forms an immediate connection with the reader and pulls them into the story. Naina's perspective sounds different from Zayne's perspective, which is such an important part of changing character perspectives, but many writers struggle to pull this off. Naina's chapters have a more formal tone to them, as restricted and proper as she feels she has to be, descriptive and heavy on emotional and mental turmoil. The memories intruding into her mind intrude into the narrative the same way, so the reader gets the full effect of what she's experiencing. Zayne's chapters, on the other hand, have a freer, more casual feel, lighter on the descriptions but focused wholly on Naina and the disconnect between who she was and who she is now, with an occasional memory to provide additional context.

Plot & pacing: 10/10
The plot of this story is the characters, so taking your time with character development the way you are is exactly what you need to be doing. There's no rush to get from one scene to the next, but there's no dragging, either. The story advances through the slice of life scenes and the thought life of the characters. It's abundantly clear that Naina's part of this story will be turbulent as she struggles to break free from her past relationship with Advik and finds peace and self-love, and for Zayne's part, he'll be the loving partner who's there for her every step of the way, enduring a massive test of his patience and affection for her. This will be a bumpy ride.

Characterization: 20/20
As I said, the plot is the characters, so characterization is essential. And you do it very naturally. Naina is trapped in a broken mental cycle of self-loathing, people-pleasing, and guilt about leaving Advik. She can't see the truth about him, or about herself, counting calories and second-guessing her clothing choices and appearance at every turn, and she can't accept Zayne's love for her, partly out of that misplaced sense of guilt, partly because she can't believe she's loveable. It's truly painful reading her chapters, because her mental state is realistic and believable, even as warped as it is, but the reader can also see the reality she can't.

And there's Zayne, the guy every girl reading this story loves. He's just happy Naina agreed to marry him, even though she's still in love with Advik, and when they go to bed, he's content knowing she's there, even though she doesn't want him to touch her. His love is strong enough that although it hurts, he can handle the rejection and the waiting, because he believes she will get better, and someday, they can act as husband and wife. In the meantime, he's constantly looking out for her, intervening when relatives make comments that could send her over the edge, seeking her out when she runs away to cry in private. He isn't perfect, though, and this is getting to him, even in these beginning chapters. It's a pretty sure bet he'll make mistakes. But it's also a pretty sure bet that he'll do whatever it takes to rectify those mistakes, because he loves Naina, and he wants what's best for her.

The side characters are all believable, realistic characters distinct from each other. We're getting a pretty clear picture of Advik through the combined memories of Naina and Zayne. He was manipulative and toxic to Naina, even before any physical abuse began, but as with many abusers, he always came back with an apology that Naina accepted and believed. And he probably did feel remorse, but that wasn't enough to change him.

The snippets about Naina's friends demonstrate who is there for her in the long-term and who was just a fair-weather friend, quick to pass judgment and take Advik's side when she finally left him. What we've seen of her family seems supportive, and Zayne's family is, too, although they clearly don't know the details about what happened between her and Advik. There's a potential for some unrest on both sides as the story progresses, but I hope the new couple ends up with the full support and love of both families.

Harmony within genre: 15/15
I'd say General Fiction is a good label for this story. It's not exactly a romance, although romantic relationships are a huge part of the story. It's more about the exploration of Naina's emotional and mental situation and the journey she and Zayne undertake to find healing.

Originality: 20/20
I saw someone in an award say this story lacked originality and they'd seen a similar plot and characters before, and that stunned me. I've never encountered another story like this. The plot and characters are completely unique, and even if there is another story similar to this that I just haven't read yet, your descriptive elements and distinctive writing style set this apart from any other book. This is a beautiful, heart-wrenching story with vivid imagery that provides an immersive experience for high reader engagement, and nobody can tell me otherwise.

*****

Final thoughts:
Love is hard. It's hard to love someone who hurts you, and it can be harder still to walk away from them. Naina knows that pain all too well. She agreed to an arranged marriage with Zayne to keep her from running back to Advik, her abusive ex-fiancé, but the guilt of not being able to return Zayne's love is just another weight on her mind. Now, she's the one hurting Zayne, if only emotionally instead of physically. His love is real, though, and he's determined to keep loving her, to stay with her no matter what happens. He's the rock she can rely on when traumatic memories taint every part of her life. But he's only human. How patient can he be? How much more can he take before it's too much? Is there hope and healing just over the horizon, or was this marriage doomed before it began?