Perhaps this was a mistake. Perhaps walking up the stairs to what felt like his doom was a petrifying mistake. Maybe it’d be better for everyone if he just turned back and went to his room, awaiting any orders Sterling would give him, living the rest of his life as a servant of a deranged mind. Or maybe he was just being dramatic about this, everyone here has had to experience that test. Yes, he was being dramatic, or weak, and there was no need for this. But, if he knew he was just being weak, then why was he still walking up those stairs? Did he honestly seek comfort from the one who ordered him to kill people more than once? Or was he just expecting an explanation? What could Sterling possibly explain to him? What could he possibly say that would justify all this? What could he say to make this crushing guilt go away? 

Vito found himself outside Sterling’s office door, staring at the doorknob. There were others in the room, but all seemed preoccupied with other things, likely orders from Sylvester. None of them paid the pine marten any mind, none of them questioned what he was doing just standing outside the office and staring at nothing. Now was his last chance to turn back and pretend nothing was wrong, pretend that he didn’t need to hear anything from the brown hare, as if he’d suddenly found a solution to his problem. 

Yet, he still didn’t move. A minute had passed and now others began to pay attention to him, glancing at him every few seconds or just staring at him. Sterling was in that small room, and had no idea he was out here. Why couldn’t he bring himself to walk away? The more he thought, the more he presumed he didn’t have much else to lose, so he knocked. There was silence for a moment, then a muttered response. 

“Come in.” Sterling hissed from behind the door. Vito swallowed, then turned the doorknob and let himself in. He peeked around the corner and his gaze locked with the brown hare’s silver eyes immediately. He looked displeased, to say the least, like he’d been interrupted while doing something very important. 

“Y-You look busy, I can come back-” 

“Sit down.” The weasel squeaked, Sterling sighed. The pine marten begrudgingly shut the door, quietly, before sitting down in the padded chair in front of the hare. 

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed you’ve been avoiding me.” Sterling said calmly, looking back down at the note he was writing. 

“I uhm, I’ve had a lot in my mind.” Vito muttered. 

“Your accent’s faded quite a lot. It’s only been a week.” the hare stated. 

“I been keepin’ to myself.” he replied. 

“You’d think with all that alone time, it’d enhance.” he chirped, a low rumble of thunder following his sentence. It’d been raining all week, and the scouts have turned up less and less information due to lack of time outside. Sterling glanced behind him at the window, then smirked. 

“Careful what you wish for, eh?” Sylvester chuckled, Vito cracked a smile, “So, what exactly has been on your mind?” he asked, clicking his pen and setting it down. 

“Uhm… a few- a few different things.” Vito choked. 

“Still trying to process the execution?” Sterling asked, Vito locked eyes with him before darting his gaze away, “executions?” the hare corrected. The pine marten swallowed, nodding. Sterling inhaled deeply, then folded his hands on his desk. 

“It takes a strong person to handle such a situation. And it takes a broken person to come out of it unaffected. You’re healthy, be happy about that.” he paused to flick a spec of dust off his desk, “In this world, you have to be careful who you bond with. Be careful of who you let into your life. You’re very lucky you were on this side of the lever, and not next in line for The Reminder. And please, for your sake, if you see someone you care about doing something stupid, warn them about what will happen to them.” the brown hare said.

“I did warn him.” Vito choked, “I told him you had it out for him, I heard what you said to- to Mayhem.” he looked up at him, right in the eyes, “I told him you had price tags on him already, and he had to stop doing whatever it was that had you all riled up.” he breathed heavily, standing up at his seat, vision foggy with tears, “I told him you wanted to kill him.” he slumped back down into his chair, Sterling retrieved a box of tissues from his desk drawer and pushed them closer to him. Vito took one, wiping his eyes with it and balling it up in his hand. 

“Then you did everything you could…” Sterling said, calm and with a blank face, “You tried to help him, but he didn’t listen. That was his idiotic mistake, not yours.” 

“I let him go.” Vito said, as the hare tilted his head to the side, “In the building, I found him- I let him go.” 

“And he still got caught? You gave him two chances, and he still failed.” he nudged the small trash can to him with his foot, “I appreciate the honesty, though I would have preferred it a little sooner. But, beggars can’t be choosers.” He smirked. His smile fell and the weasel in front of him didn’t return one. 

“There is a very important aspect of life called ‘natural selection’…” Sterling sighed, “Springer got two separate warnings to change whatever thought or idea was in that head of his, and chose not to heed them. That kind of… call it stupidity or, or ignorance, does not earn you a long, happy life here. For both themselves, and those who gave him those warnings.” he added, Vito looked down at the trash can, “Which is why those idiots must be eliminated early, so they can’t hurt the people who do care.” he chirped, Vito only nodding in response. 

“Oh, I know it hurts.” Sterling stood up and knelt next to him, “I lost something in that ordeal as well. And… and that keeps me up at night. I guess I’d gotten used to having another body next to me. But, that happens here, and there’s really not much you can do about it, other than apologize.” 

“Apologize to who?” 

“Whoever you think needs to hear it. Springer, Wilson… yourself, for letting yourself bond with him. It’s not your fault he’s dead-” 

“I’m the one who pulled the lever.” Vito snapped. 

“Yes, on my orders. You didn’t want to, you had no choice. You know what I would have done if you refused, and you acted appropriately. You followed orders, and did exactly what I told you to, I’d hardly think that’s your fault. Besides, you warned him.” he grinned. 

“I warned him…” Vito repeated. 

“And you’re lucky to have been found by me. Anyone else likely would have killed you if they caught you on their territory.” 

“Yeah…” 

“Say it.” he ordered, snapping Vito’s gaze to him. He stammered, then did as he said as the grin slowly faded away. 

“I-I’m lucky that you found me, because… others would have killed me,” he muttered. 

“That’s right. Always remember that.” Sterling said, standing back up, “No one likes to feel unappreciated, like you did when your father kicked you out for losing a match? Isn’t that what you told me?” he asked. 

“Yeah.” he hung his head. 

“I’d never make you feel like that, I always try to make everyone here feel important, because they are. That’s why I have harvests, and that’s why White Fang will go down in history.” he sat back down at his desk properly, “Is there anything else?” he asked. 

“No…” Vito said, “wait, yes. I don’t think I should eat the meat here for a while…” he squeaked. 

“Why?” 

“Ju… jus’ until the next harvest.” he said, holding his own hand. 

“Ah, I see.” Sterling replied, “You know, it’s very unlikely that you’ll be served the meat from one individual.” 

“I just can’t do it again. It’s happened before-” 

“That was ordered by me specifically. Though, I suppose it was a little insensitive of me. I was a little caught up in the victory of it, I wasn’t thinking about you. I apologize.” Sterling said, face sincere, his eyes bored. 

“Don’t worry about it.” Vito replied, “I just can’t risk it again-” 

“Of course,” The hare sighed, “just for a little while, you said?” 

“Yeah. Thank you.” 

“Anytime, Vito. You’re a very emotional young man…” Sterling said, “Sometimes, I think to myself that everything would be easier if we didn’t have emotions. But, then we’d be feral.” he smiled warmly. 

“Right. I should go-” 

“Vito, maybe you should come up to my chambers tonight.” Sterling said abruptly, “We’ll share a drink, talk a little more. You got more in there, don’t you?” 

“Uh… sure.” the pine marten replied. 

“We’ll watch TV, you like TV, don’t you?” Sterling stood up, approaching him like he was stalking prey. 

“Uh, yeah, sure.” he replied, stepping back. 

“You know, since Wilson’s passing, I’ve felt a little… empty. I think you can help me.” the hare breathed, eyes wide and crazed. 

“Uh…” 

“You’ll come, won’t you?” he asked. 

“Yeah! Yeah, I’ll come.” Vito stammered. 

“Yes! At 8 o’clock, after dinner, you’ll come.” 

“Yeah, uh, I’ll see you then, sir.” 

“Call me Sylvester.” the brown hare said, Vito nodded. 

“Yes, sir- Sylvester.” 

“Go to your room and- and… I dunno. I’ve got a few things to do, I’ll see you in a few hours, right?” he asked, eyes and ears both fixated on the weasel.

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” 

“Good! Just promise me you won’t do anything drastic…” Sterling muttered. 

“Drastic? No, sir.” 

“You understand what that means, don’t you?” He asked, “Not many people here stomach my orders well… There are two types of people in White Fang; those who handle the first test flawlessly, and those who couldn’t handle the weight of what they have done…” he trailed off. Vito stared at him, brow furrowed and jaw clenched. 

“But, it sorts out the weak ones. Can I tell you a little secret?” the brown hare leaned in close to the weasel’s ear, “I only plan on keeping the Mastiffs. As time passes, more and more people will earn that blue card, and everyone else will be… used in other ways.” He purred. 

“You mean… slaughtered?” Vito asked him, fighting back a gag. 

“‘Slaughtered’ is a hideous word, but yes. And every Mastiff knows it, and if they tell anyone, they die.” 

“So… what Tanner was saying, about you killing everyone? That was true?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper. 

“Yes. But, that’s so far off into the future, every member of White Fang now probably has nothing to worry about.” He chirped, “And that’s why Mastiffs who know someone below the blue card, they heavily encourage them to behave themselves. This excludes children, that is. Very young one’s.” he went on, “Do you understand?” he asked 

“Yes, sir.” Vito replied, “Jus’... one more question,” Sterling cocked his head, “What’r you doin’ wit’ the foals? Has their mother been executed yet?” 

“No, she hasn’t. She’s a very special one, I don’t know how I want to end her. It’s almost a shame to kill her, but I want those stripes on my wall.” he chuckled, “As for the foals… I don’t know. That colt may be too old to salvage, but the baby can definitely be used. It’s a shame to execute someone so young though, I don’t think he’ll accept our lifestyle here…” Sterling paused, “I don’t know, I’ll figure it out. Why?” 

“No reason, sir. Jus’ wondering.” Vito replied. 

“Is there anything you would like to do with them?” the hare asked. 

“No, sir. Jus’… been wonderin’.” 

“Alright… Well, go on your way, and meet me upstairs in a few hours.” Sterling grinned. 

“Yes, sir.” he said, “Is… is there anything else you need me for?” 

“Not at the moment. Is there something else you wish to talk about?” 

“No, sir. Goodbye, sir.” Vito muttered. 

“Goodbye, Vito…” Sterling replied slowly, watching him walk out the door. He clicked his tongue, then pressed a little red button on his desk. 

“Axle, can you hear me?” he spoke into the speaker. 

“Yes, sir, loud and clear.” the mountain lion replied. 

“You know that pine marten right? The one who pulled the trigger on that stallion?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Keep a close eye on him. Seems a bit down lately, and we don’t want to lose another good man to himself, do we?” 

“No, sir. Why’s he upset, sir?” 

“He was close with that hare Springer. Unnecessarily close. I’m afraid I broke him a little too much…” 

“Well, you always say that you can’t fix something until it’s broken, right?”  

“I do say that, yes. But some things are too broken to fix. I hope I haven’t ruined him, he’s a very valuable Mastiff… Weasel’s are always keen to have.” 

“Yes, sir. I will do that, sir.” 

“Good, I’ve told him to meet me upstairs tonight, we’ll have a drink or two, that’s when I’m really worried about him… See if you can befriend him, that always makes grief easier, right?” 

“Uh… yes, sir.” 

“I just sent him back to his room, see if you can catch him and… do something with him. Entertain him, I don’t really care what you do.” 

“Yes, sir.” 

What had he done now? What gave him a good reason to stare down the massive building he now called home? Why bother, at this point? Surely he wasn’t really planning to jump, and he knew that. Every so often he came up here, just to stare at the road with no barrier between him and the one-hundred-foot drop. Of course, it was only one hundred feet from the roof, not his office. There had been a break in the rain, and he didn’t have much time to enjoy himself. Not like he had much time to do that anyway, he had things to do. He came up here to think with no interruptions, sometimes just to think about everything he’d done. Things that kept him awake at night, things he could hide from himself with alcohol and his trophies, or things that just ate away at his mind.

Sometimes he just felt like coming up to the roof of his building and just think about what would happen if he did jump. Sometimes, he got close. Sometimes, he stepped to the edge of the building and looked down. They say that looking down will snap you out of whatever hex made you step that close to begin with, and he believed the wind and screams of horror had saved his life several times. Maybe this time, he’d actually do it. He never got scared of that thought, everytime it entered his head, it only ever scared him when he looked down, and counted the windows he could see. He could never bear to count all of them, his nerves always got the better of him. But, maybe this time would be different. Maybe this time, he’d do it. With all the things he’s done, who wouldn’t? If he could just… not look down, just don’t look down. That’s what they say, “don’t look down.” 

Sterling stood by the edge of his building, thunder beckoning him. Either to or from the edge, he couldn’t tell, but the wind blew against him. Could this have been a sign? A sign to step away and go back to his office, he had so many more papers to write, so many more unattended things to do, or fix, was this worth it? If he jumped, he didn’t have to, but White Fang wouldn’t have a leader.

That was it, he gasped and fell back, fell right onto his rump, breathing rapid breaths as he attempted to settle himself. The coarse stucco of the roof dug into the pads of his hands, his ears fell to the back of his head in shame, or in fear. He coughed, his dry throat stinging in retaliation to his labored coughs, only making him cough and wheeze more. He swallowed, then whimpered, gritting his teeth as he bared them in a grimace. 

“White Fang needs you.” he said to himself, choking up a sob, 

“White Fang needs you…”