⚠️*Trigger warning: Suicidal thoughts*⚠️

Princess Victoria

I sit in the bath, closing my eyes and allowing the warm water to hold me like a hug. The heat helps my tense muscles be calm.

I look at my stomach beneath the bubbles, tracing my scars with my fingers. Their pink hue turns the water a rose color. Some of them still hurt to touch even after a month of healing.

I sink my body below the bubbles, holding my breath beneath the waterline. I pop back above the water after is becomes hard to stay under any longer. What am I doing? I can't do that.

I allow my eyes to wander around the room, looking for something to distract my mind I find Clarke's armor laid out for the day. He has not gotten dressed yet. The silver reflects my face, showing me the despair on my face.

Five men flash in an image in my eyes for a split second, remembering the look on my face when they got close enough for me to see myself in their bloodied armor.

I can not stand these constant reminders I see every day of what happened to me. It has all become too much.

I sink my body low in the tub again, wondering how long I will have to stay under to end it all.

End my suffering. End the nightmares. End the torture. End all of my hurting. End my life.

My lungs begin to burn the longer I stay under. I know if I can just push past this pain, things will be infinitely easier for me.

Large hands splash in the water, gabbing on to my shoulders, causing me to scream out in pain. His nails dig into my sore skin as he yanks me out of the tub, pulling me onto the floor.

I cough and gasp for air as he wraps a large towel around me. He sits in the floor with his body wrapped around mine. I stare at the tub, wondering how close I really was to having it all be over?

"We have to talk to Henry. I have been patient but he needs to know. This has gotten out of hand. That's the third time this week, Victoria." Clarke tries to talk to me. All I can think about is how close I must have been this time. "Victoria?!" He shakes me out of my trance, forcing me to look into his eyes. "Talk to me."

"What's the point?" I ask.

"What's the point? The point is I love you! The point is you tried to kill yourself! The point is I do not want you to suffer anymore!" Clarke sounds angry but I know he is just upset.

"Then why did you keep stoping me?" I ask, looking him straight in the eyes so he can see how much I hurt.

"Because I love you, Victoria. Because you are stronger than this." His tears fall onto my towel.

"What if I'm not?" I shrug.

"I happen to know that you are." Clarke holds my cheeks, keeping my face close to his. "Please, let's go talk to Henry. You need help. Let me help you." I stare at him, weighing my options. I am not sure I want to do this anymore. "Please."

"Do not let them chain me up in an asylum." I beg him. "I can not handle being tied up again."

"Never." He shakes his head. "I will never let that happen. Never."

"Okay." I nod.

"Okay?" He asks. I nod again. He helps me stand. "Okay, let's get you dressed." I feel his hands on my skin as he pulls my dress up my body. "Are you ready?" He spins me around slowly. My hair drips onto my bare feet. I nod. "Okay then, let's go." He grabs my hand and walks with me.

I know he is only going with me because he can not trust me alone anymore.

We enter the kitchen, finding Henry sitting down at one of the tables. "H-Henry?" I clear my throat. I look at the person he is talking to. She is hunched over a bowl of soup. "Is that Serena? I was hoping to talk to you alone." I cry, rubbing my arms.

"Victoria?" He stands. "What is it?"

I look at Clarke for support and then back at Henry. "I- I need help, Henry."

The brunch guest stands and removes the hood of her cloak. "Victoria?" She asks, turning towards me.

"Mother?"

*
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