"The R stands for . . . Penis."
••••

Draco laid in bed, his eyes focused on the ceiling as yesterdays events unfolded in his mind.
---

"Harry James Potter," Draco spoke; his jaw clenching.

---

He brought his hands to his face, covering it,

--

"I dont give a damn how much you protest or deny it, but you're going to bloody listen to me and believe every fucking word that comes out of my mouth or so help me I will presonally throw you off of this tower."

---

He groaned into his hands, afterwards sliding them down his face until his fingertips were left at his mouth,

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"I know you're scared, but there is one in a trillion chances of anyone you care about being taken away from you." Draco explained, "oi, look at me when I'm talking to you," he ordered, grabbing Harry's cheeks so he was facing him.

"Stop blaming yoursel--"

"I cant help it! It's my fau--"

Draco slapped him, "listen to me, Potter!"

---

Draco looked down at his pocket watch, 6am. He sighed, knowing he wouldn't sleep tonight.
But it was the same with Harry.

---

"Everyone voluntarily risked their lives for you and everyone else in the world. It isn't your fault. It never was. It was voldemorts. You risked your life just as much as they did. And if you didn't, more people would be dead. Millions of people would be dead. Gone. And it would continue for Merlin knows how long. The only thing that'd be your fault, would be if you DIDN'T fight. Then nearly everyone would be dead."

---

Draco sat up, putting his feet to the ground, but stayed sitting on the bed. His elbows rested on his knees as he fingers intertwined with eachother. He slumped over, his eyes focused on the ground, and loose strands of hair hung over his face.

---

"You could've died out there. But you didn't. If you would've, Voldemort would still be alive, and he'd kill everyone. If you would've died, this world would go to hell."

"But Neville was there."

"He wouldn't be in your situation right now, would he?"
---

Draco clenched his jaw, his eyes trailing to his closed - and locked - door.

---

"You are the farthest thing from Pathetic, Harry." Draco said, softer, his silver eyes switching between each of Harry's jade  ones. "So many people would've given up so much sooner. You're strong, Harry. Unbelievably strong. I know if I were in your place, I'd given up. I would've killed myself. But you haven't... and Merlin, I'm so proud of you for not giving up,"

---

Draco ran a hand through his hair, cursing under his breath.

---

"You don't look pathetic, Potter," Draco whispered softly, "in my eyes, you look strong. So, so strong. For pulling through this far. And you're not giving up, I'll have none of that bullshit." His tone got harsher. "You're going to keep pulling through. Those people - your friends that had died - died for you. They wouldn't want you to die as well. You're so much better than that, Potter."

---

Draco stood up, his knees wobbly. He hasn't moved from his bed - let alone the position he was in - since he got there.

---

"I know you're fucking tired of everything, but you aren't giving up. You're going to pull through this, just like everyone else."

Draco's gazed lingered on Harry's lips, before switching back to Harry's eyes.

They were so, so close. Draco could feel Harry's breath on his lips.

---

Draco swallowed and walked over to his windows, opening the curtains, immediately getting blinded by the rising sun.

---

To Draco's surprised, Harry was no longer focused on Draco's eyes, but instead his lips. They quickly shot up to Draco's Mercury eyes when he realized he was staring for too long.

---

Draco watched the sunrise. Watched as the orange blended with the pink, and the pink with the purple, tinting the few clouds out there with multiple different colours.

He was surprised. He was in an internal battle with himself - suffering... yet the world seemed to continue on... as if Draco's world wasn't -- no, as if his world hadn't already fallen to dust long ago.

---

Draco wasn't thinking straight. He must've been seeing things - but he didn't care. He took no time in pushing his and Harry's lip together, kissing Harry as deeply as possible.

His heart skipped a few beats when Harry began kissing back, and almost stopped completely when Harry wrapped his hands around Draco's hips and pulled him in closer; distintegrating any gap between the two completely.

---

Draco's eyes closed at the memory, his jaw clenching once more.
He cursed under his breath again.

---

Draco backed Harry into the cobble wall, his hands roaming from his cheeks to his chest, and Harry moved one of his hands up from his hips to Draco's cheek; cupping it.
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Draco blinked and bit his lip, looking back to his door, wondering if Harry was awake as well.

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They seperated for air, each of them still in a trance.

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Draco walked to his door, his hand lingering over the knob, before he quickly took it back, as if the knob had burned him.

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Once they realized what they were doing, and how close they were, they each backed up, Harry backing farther against the wall.

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Draco closed his eyes once more, anger filling in the pit of his stomach, you're a bloody idiot.

---

"Harry... I-..."

"What the fuck was that?" Harry cut him off.

Draco didn't dare meet eye contact with him, even though he so desperately wanted to look back into his comforting eyes.

"I didn't mean to...-"

"It bloody seemed like it!" Harry snapped.

---

Draco took a breath, his hand resting on the door knob as he leaned his head against the wooden door, his brows furrowing at the memory.

---

"Says the one who kissed back!" Draco snapped, you can't bloody control yourself, you bigot!

"I didn't know what I was doing!" Harry defeneded, "I was sad! I do stupid things when I'm sad! You're the one who kissed me!"

---

Draco swallowed, and creaked opened his door slightly.
He peaked his head out, seeing Harry's door closed as well.

---

"I'm sorry, okay?!" Draco apologized, "I didn--"

Draco'a sentence was cut short by his head whipping to the side, a sting left on his cheek.

---

Draco closed his door again, retreating back to his bed as he burried himself under the covers, his eyes watering.

---

Draco's jaw clenched, "Listen, Potter," Draco spoke through his teeth, and he raised his head to look at Harry, his cheek still stinging, "I know you're straight. I didn't mean to kiss you-"

"Didn't mean to? How do you accidently kiss someone?!"

"It just happened!" Draco yelled back, he had to get out of there, he could feel the tears in the back of his eyes. He could feel his heart in his throat. He could feel his cheeks burn. He felt like everything around him was crumbling to dust.

---

Draco curled up into a fetal position, the blanket still covering his body,

---

"Some bloody explanation!" Harry retort.

Draco's jaw clenched once more, tears threatening to spill, "I give up," he whispered, "I'm sorry." With that, he quickly made his way out of the clock tower, and to their dorm.

The moment his back was facing Harry, the tears fell. And they fell. And they fell. And they fell. And they continued to fall for hours on end.

---

Silent tears leaked onto Draco's mattress, his lips quivering. He felt his body shake as he let out a quiet sob.

He immediately bit the side of his hand in an attempt to keep quiet. He couldn't let Harry know how much this affected him.

He quickly wiped away the tears when he heard a faint knock on his door.

He didn't answer, he stayed silent and continued hiding under his covers.

His door creaked opened slowly, "Hey," Harry whispered.

Draco jammed his eyes shut in anger, "get out." He ordered, his voice muffled from the blanket.

"Draco-"

"Don't!" Draco snapped, sitting up, "get out!" He ordered, pointing at the door.

"Draco pl--"

"Don't call me that!" He chucked a pillow at Harry, "get out!" He demanded once more, his voice quivering with both; sadness and rage.

Harry set his jaw, "No,"

"Potter," Draco warned, "get the fuck out. Right. Now."

"No."

Draco stood up and pushed past Harry, quickly making his way towards the stairs, "Draco!" Harry called, grabbing his wrist.

"I told you not to call me that!"

"Dra...- please listen to me!"

"No!" He yelled, "get the fuck off me!"

That's when Harry noticed his wet eyelashes, and his red, puffy eyes.

"Were you..." he paused, "were you crying?"

Draco looked away, "of course not. Now let go of me." He ordered.

"Draco... just... please... let me talk to you..."

"Theres nothing to talk about!" Draco snapped, "I've ruined the little bit of friendship we had! It's gone! It's not coming back! Now just let. Me. Go." He demanded.

When Harry didn't obey, he yanked his arm away from him, running down the stairs. But Harry still chased him.

Harry grabbed Draco's wrist once more and pinned him against the wall, "Draco Lucius Malfoy, listen to me!"

"There's nothing to listen to!"

"Yes there is! Otherwise I wouldn't be trying to get you to listen!"

Draco fell silent, allowing Harry to let go of a breath, "please, just listen to to me."

Draco paused and weighed his options. When he realized he didn't have many that didn't result in him getting charged with murder, he caved.

"fine."

••••

Im probably getting new glasses tomorrow  ¯\_(ツ)_/