"We can explain!" I blurted out hastily.

"Please do," Jacob with pseudo calm. I cringed, swaying slightly. 

Okay, maybe I was not as sober as I thought.

I steadied myself on the counter top. 

"You drove here drunk like that?!" Jacob seethed.

"Umm no?" I muttered, sitting down on the barstool. I gulped down more water, hoping to sober up . . . how many drinks was it in all, three? Four?

I hiccupped. My hand flew up to my mouth reflexively.

Five.

Yeah, that's right.

Oh god, just let me live to see the daylight again.

"Belle, are you okay?" Carter asked, evidently concerned. He got over Logan quickly. Probably because it was very normal.

"Yeah," I hiccupped again.

Oh God, why? 

"Let's get you to bed," he sighed. "Jay, take Logan to the couch, will you? He'll sleep there and deal with the back pain tomorrow."

Jacob didn't show any signs of hearing Carter even if he did. He only glared at me.

I gulped.

"Let's go," Carter urged, pulling me upstairs with him. He didn't have to tell me twice to get me to cooperate. He left me some PJs on my bed, made sure I washed my face and brushed my teeth before leaving.

My lack of actual parents was surely made up by having three amazing brothers. I could have been in jail for murder and they would have broken me out of there and ran away with me.

I lazily changed into my night clothes and snuggled deep in my covers. I was out like light in seconds.

*************************

I woke up early in the morning with a full bladder.

Gee, I wonder why?

I shot out of bed, getting up on my feet too fast. I had to sit back again as black spots swirled in front of my eyes. I shut my eyes tight, trying to dispel the uncomfortable feeling. It went away quickly enough.

I rushed to the bathroom, trying to please myself with the little fact that all I had to do was pee whereas most in my shoes would be puking their guts out right now.

Like Logan.

I wondered if he was awake yet. I checked the time and was surprised that it was past eight. Carter must have disabled my alarm for the day. I sighed and decided to freshen up. I took a quick shower, got dressed in a loose shirt and a pair of shorts and went downstairs.

Logan was nowhere in sight. Nor was anyone else. I could hear voices though. Of someone retching, I think, and someone talking.

Oh that's right, I was in trouble. 

Maybe if I leave now I can make a run for it. They'll have to go to the dorms again tonight, right? That's when I'm coming back, then.

Without eating anything like I originally planned to, I just grabbed my keys, ran upstairs to get my wallet, and tiptoed past Carter's room from where the noises were coming from. I cringed at Carter's stern and reproachful voice. I quietly pushed open the garage door, sighing in relief.

"Going somewhere?" 

I jumped like a foot in the air when I heard Jacob's voice, gasping like a fish.

"No," I shook my head frantically at my brother who was casually seated on the hood of his white Porsche.

"Really?" He quirked an eyebrow.

"Umm yeah," I stuttered a little. 

I swear to god, he could make me go back to my four year old self from a self confidant bitch in a matter of seconds sometimes. I hated it. 

"With your wallet and keys, what else are you doing here?" He questioned.

"Umm," I tried to think of something.

"Isabelle." He deadpanned.

"Alright, okay, fine!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands up in the air. "I was going to go away for the day. To the beach, maybe? Anywhere but here!"

"And why is that?"

"You know why, Jacob."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"You're my little sister." He stated.

"And you're my big brother," I rolled my eyes. "I think we established that seventeen years ago."

He glared.

"Okay, fine, continue," I put my hands up in defense, leaning against the wall.

"It's a new city, Isabelle. We don't know anyone here. Do you even know who's party you were at yesterday?"

I opened my mouth and closed it again. He had a point.

I do not.

"My friends were there," I defended myself weakly.

"You don't," he stated. "That's what I thought." He shook his head.

"I worry about you, Izzy."

I stayed silent.

"You came home drunk at one thirty two in the morning. One thirty two. Do you have any idea how worried I was when you weren't home like you said you'll be? When you didn't answer any of my calls and texts? And then to see you come home with a half conscious Logan, knowing you drove drunk in an unknown city? What if someone took advantage of you?" His voice raised a little with every sentence.

I felt so guilty. He had a point; I was incredibly reckless. Shit. I hadn't checked my phone even that morning. 

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, bowing my head, dragging a hand down my face.

He stared at me for a solid minute before sighing. 

"Just don't do it again."

"What?!" My head snapped up.

"Don't do it again," he repeated himself firmly.

"Do what? Party in general or go MIA and drive home drunk after midnight?" I asked.

"Both," he narrowed his eyes at me.

"Jacob," I said flatly, "That's ridiculous and you know it."

"It's not!"

"It is! I am a teenager whether you like it or not. I want to have fun with my peers. You're being unreasonable. And a hypocrite. I remember you partying quite a bit in your high school days. I don't see why I can't."

"Isabelle."

"Don't Isabelle me," I snapped. Okay so I made one mistake, but that's how I would learn, right? How was I to learn without messing up first? And it was not like I was brainless. "I want a reason that doesn't involve me having more X chromosomes than you."

He rubbed his temples tiredly.

"Come on, Jacob!" I cried, exasperated at his obvious unspoken answer. "That's bullshit and you know it. I'll be careful and I'll inform you of my whereabouts. I'll drink less and make sure I'm with people I know. What else can you ask for?"

"I'll think about it," he sighed after a while. I narrowed my eyes at him but let it go. I had fought enough to last a while. He would come around eventually.

"Fine." I conceded.

"Breakfast?" He offered quickly.

"I'm starving!" I exclaimed, welcoming a topic change. "By the way, what were you doing here in the garage?" I asked curiously after a beat.

He grinned.

"I had a feeling you'd make a run for it," he jumped off the hood. I rolled my eyes.

"I hate your sixth sense," I stated,  opening the garage door, walking back inside, to the kitchen.

He laughed.

"I know," he mused knowingly.

"Hash browns?" He offered.

"Please," I plopped down on the stool.

"Coming right up," he sang.

"You're bipolar you know?" I laughed. He ruffled my hair.

"Nope, I'm just an older sibling. You won't know how it feels like." He smiled.

"Sure," I drawled.

He got to work and I watched him. He could cook well. I was watching him prepare my plate when Carter walked in followed by a groaning Logan.

"You look nice," I chuckled.

"Shut up!" he snapped. "Just because you're immune to hangovers doesn't mean the rest of us are."

Yes, I don't suffer from hangovers. People like me do exist. We're not a myth, you guys.

"Advil?" I offered, ignoring his mood. I was used to people being extra cranky around me just because I don't suffer as they do. They thought I should, too. I thought I shouldn't. See the conflict?

"Two," he demanded. He sat funny, at an awkward angle.

"I'll go get them," I rolled my eyes. "Thanks for last night, Cart." I hugged him.

"Anytime, Bells," he smiled, hugging me back. I skipped upstairs, opening the cabinets in my bathroom and getting out the medicine kit. I opened the kit and took out one entire pack of Advils. It was not like I needed them anyways. I ran back downstairs and threw the pack of pills at him, shouting a quick, "Here!"

He grunted as the pack hit him on his head and I stifled a laugh. He cursed, glaring at me and rubbing his temples. I gave him a faux innocent shrug, biting back another laugh.

It was entertaining to watch a hungover Logan, I couldn't help it. Don't judge me.

I observed him for a long time as he grumbled incoherently, avoiding light and complaining continuously. He snapped at us for no apparent reasons, he ate a lot, and would groan whenever we laughed too loud while conversing. 

That truly made me thank my little genetic quirk that makes me immune to such hideous mornings.

"Just go to your room and sleep, Logan," I sighed.

He didn't reply, but pushed his chair and went upstairs nonetheless. I turned to our brothers.

"I thought that you guys weren't coming home this weekend," I interrupted their conversation rudely, asking the question that had been on my mind for a while. They stopped and faced me, unfazed by the interruption.

They probably were making small talk to pass time.

"We worked our asses of all day so we could come and see you guys in the evening," Carter disclosed.

Oh.

"So, you'll go back tonight?" I asked.

"No, we'll leave in the afternoon to finish a few more assignments we need to do," Jacob told me apologetically.

"I'm assuming that when Logan wakes up there's going to be another lecture on responsibility?" I questioned

"You assume right," Jake told me with narrowed eyes.

"Awesome," I said sarcastically, getting up. "See you then."

"You are grounded, missy, so don't even think of going out," he saw through me.

"Fine," I huffed and trudged to my room, slamming the door shut behind me.

I face planted into my bed.

Now what?

Well, I could do the assignments that were due tomorrow or I could read another book.

A new book it is.

***********************

We saw our brothers off a few hours after lunch . . . and a very eventful afternoon which mainly consisted of them lecturing us. We could attend a party as long as we told them and let them track us. Track us. That was ridiculous, but they didn't want our inputs. Their minds were set.

Logan has been forbidden to hook up. Again.

I've lost count of the number of times I've either witnessed or heard of them talking about Logan knocking some girl up. He never listened, though. It was rather amusing, really.

Logan was pissed, to say the least. I watched the spectacle with an evil sense of humor, fulfilling the duty of a naughty little sister, snickering at the right places. He was still a little hungover despite the pills, food and water. Frankly, I was surprised, that his liver was still functioning.

"It's Monday again tomorrow," I whined, plopping down on the couch with a pout.

"Fuck," Logan groaned.

"Still hungover?" I inquired in amusement.

He gave me a stink eye, sensing the jest.

"No, I just like drowning myself in my eternal misery," he droned.

I frowned, playing along, "Well, you shouldn't. Talk it out!"

He eyed my face for a minute, falling for it. When he took a deep breath, closing his eyes, his lips twitching a little. 

I lost it.

I laughed out loud. His eyes snapped open and a flicker of hurt and vulnerability flashed through them before it was replaced by the mask of irritation and annoyance he had taken to wear around me. These days if it was not that, his face would be emotionless.

That change made me shut up, looking anywhere but him awkwardly.

"Ha ha, that was funny," I forced out an awkward chuckle. I cringed internally at it myself. He actually has something bothering him. He was going to tell me. Now he wouldn't. Fuck. Why did I do that?

I fidgeted with my fingers.

What was happening to us? We were so good just last week . . . What changed? I missed my Fun Brother.

Yes, they are labeled. When you have more than one brother figure, you kind of start labelling them.

Jake was the Overprotective Brother. Carter was the one I went to when Jake was mad at me. He was mature and could help me out without any judgement. He was the Sweet Brother. Logan, with all his rebellious streaks was the Fun Brother. The best person to go to have fun, to have a breather. I couldn't remember ever being this suffocated in his presence. I missed the carefree feel his presence used to give me. I missed our dynamic.

"Sure was," he commented drily, getting up. "I'm gonna go up and sleep. Night." He stiffly walked away.

I faceplanted into he sofa and groaned.

Why me?

My mind was now finally blank after over twelve hours of hurried activity. For all my talk of being happy about being immune to hangovers, I did have a few drawbacks. I remembered every embarrassing thing my fucked up self did when high on alcohol. Super inconvenient, if you ask me.

Take last night party, for example.

I kissed Benjamin Felix Rodriguez.

Well, technically we kissed each other, but that knowledge was not really helpful. The point is, my drunken brain found that hunk of flesh attractive enough to make out with.

Cue the cringe.

Great genes, I know, I know. Move on.

Each time I thought about the night before, about the feel of his lips on mine, it made me giddy, made my heart beat fast and butterflies erupt in my stomach.

I swore off that feeling a long time ago. I didn't like how it ended for me. Not everything is sunshine and roses when there's teen romance. Not every story ends well. There's deception, manipulation, inconsideration and insensitivity. It scars you. In a way that you can't seem to be able to forget it completely.

So why did I do that? Why? I'd blame the alcohol, but I wasn't really that drunk. I could hold my alcohol well.

But its not like I hadn't used making out with random strangers as a way to rebound or get my mind off things. No, I'd done plenty of that. Then why was I make a big deal out of this?

Because I'm scared that this time I actually really liked it. 

Because this time, with his kiss I went back to the innocent Isabelle who saw the world with big doe eyes. The Isabelle who believed in love, familiarity and forever. The naïve Isabelle who trusted easily. Too easily. The Isabelle who liked to take a chance, to get involved. The Isabelle I swore to never be again.

The Isabelle in me he killed.

*************************

I woke up at five thirty the next morning dreading going to school. I was terrified. I did not want the past to repeat itself. I may not have as much to lose this time like I did back then, but that certainly didn't change the situation. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't. I wouldn't.

Nip it in the bud, Iz.

I decisively got up and started my day, swaying slightly again as black spots clouded my vision. I sat down and drank some water, waiting for the feeling to go away. I felt like I was missing something. Something I should remember but I was missing.

I shook my head. If I forgot, it wasn't something worth remembering in the first place.

I went for a jog, worked out a little, showered, had breakfast, packed lunch, avoided Logan like he avoided me, and left for school. 

School. Somewhere I was bound to run into Benjamin at some point.

What was I supposed to say to him? He didn't even consider me a friend. He must have been furious with both of us for letting that happen.

And Lauren . . . Oh, my god. I didn't even want to think about it.

I drove at a snail's pace, trying to postpone an inevitable confrontation. I listened to music trying to calm myself. Why was I getting so worked up over one simple kiss? So what we kissed? People do it all the time these days! Strangers, bestfriends, lovers, everyone.

Albeit ours wasn't supposed to happen, its not that big of a deal.

Then. Why. The. Fuck. Am. I. So. Worked. Up?

I hit my steering wheel in frustration, eliciting a screeching horn from it. I jumped, annoyed. A few people driving nearby shot me dirty glares. I glared right back.

I accidently sounded the horn. Sue me.

I thought about skipping, but I couldn't. Jake was tracking me like Carter was tracking Logan.

I pulled into an empty spot in the parking lot. It was almost void of students. Most of them were already inside. Meaning, now the bell could ring any moment and I need to climb three flights of stairs to get my books from my locker before I got to my class . . . which would start in T minus four minutes.

Fan-fucking-tastic.

I heaved a deep breath and got out. I locked my car and raced upstairs, dodging freshmen and sophomores. I cursed under my breath-

Well, when are you not cursing?

Hey, bitch, long time no see? I shot back sarcastically. I tried killing my subconscious. Turned out its nearly impossible. So I was stuck with that lovely lady forever. True love right there. Great, wasn't it?

-as the bell rang. I was definitely gonna be late. Yippee.

************************

I slumped down in my usual seat in  AP Lit. Luke was yet to arrive and so was Freya. I was looking at the doors for them when the person I least expected walked in. My heart went into overdrive again.

Benjamin.

He saw me too, apparently, because he brushed of some girl throwing herself all over him and walked towards me. He slid into the seat Luke usually occupied and turned to me.

"Since when do you have this class?" I asked him, feigning annoyance. 

Did I not mention that I'm great at hiding my emotions? Oops.

"Since the start of the semester," he rolled his eyes.

"That's Luke's seat," I mumbled at him, changing tactics and wondering why the heck I didn't see him in this class last week. 

Well, to be fair, since I already did this course before in homeschooling, I skipped a few classes out of boredom.

"He'll find some other seat," he shrugged.

Uh oh.

"Hey, Izzy," Luke greeted me from behind me. I spun around to see him standing at the very door I exited quite haughtily from on my first day.

"Luke!" I exclaimed.

"Hey, Benji," Lucian smiled, seemingly unbothered by the fact that his usual seat was currently occupied. He took an empty seat in front of me.

"Luke," Ben smiled faintly.

"Why are you here?" I snapped at him.

"What?" He asked, very evidently confused.

Hun?

"Look, about Saturday night," I began, determined to shut this thing down before it escalated.

Nip it in the bud.

"What about it?" He asked, not following.

"You don't remember?!" I whisper-yelled.

"Remember what?" He asked, furrowing his brows.

I swear to God-

"The-"

"He drank a lot that day. He had a killer hangover yesterday, he doesn't remember anything except for the few initial hours of the night," Luke piped in, shooting me a look. I forgot he was here. My cheeks colored. 

He knows.

"Oh," I muttered, looking away.

"Why? Did something happen?" Ben asked.

"Nothing!" Both I and Lucian cried out together. Ben looked between us weirdly, his look clearly saying he didn't believe us but didn't press for information. He just scowled and looked away.

My eyes met Luke's. 'We need to talk,' he mouthed. I merely nodded, looking away.

He didn't remember. He didn't know we kissed. He didn't . . . Jesus. Wasn't that indirectly what I wanted? To resolve this? To move past it as if nothing happened? To prevent it from escalating?

There, he didn't even remember. 

Problem solved.

Then why in the effing world do I feel worse?

******************************
3rd May, 2021
******************************

A/N:-

Okay, I'm genuinely curious. Who do you ship Isabelle with? There are so many eligible candidates! What do ya think??? Comment you thoughts!!

Also, Benjamin and Isabelle had their first kiss!! But he doesn't remember. Lol, I know I'm a bitch. What do you think will happen next??

Sorry for the late update, but this is how its gonna be from now on. I sincerely apologize, but after eight hours of online lectures plus their homework and weekly tests, I don't have much left in me. I write a few words everyday, though, so amen to that.

Hope you guys are enjoying the read. 

Vote, comment, fan and share if you liked my work. Thank you!!

All my love,
xoxo.