Hello.

Naughty JungKook made an appearance in this story. So there is that. Oh yea ! Thanks for 20k reads guys! Woah... that's a lot of people. 🥺💜💜💜

Trigger warning~ coma type dream thing, (he is not in a coma)

~~~~

"Hyung? Can you help me later today for the new dance?" Hoseok sighed, he already had to help Jin, Namjoon and Taehyung with the dance, and now Jungkook needed help. "I can't seem to get this one part right."

"Yes, just come with the rest of us when we leave." He sighed, annoyed.
"Thanks, hyung! You're the best!" Hoseok patted Jungkook on the shoulder, and sat down on a stool at the breakfast bar. Jungkook left the room, so he buried his head in his hands and sighed out of frustration. Everyone had needed his help, Jungkook could normally nail the routine almost as quickly as Jimin and himself, why was this time different?

His phone rung, his ringtone had been changing a lot since he first entered the dorms. They all had iphones except for yoongi, therefore they never knew who's phone was ringing. So they all changed theirs' to a unique sound, Hoseok's being Jungkook's voice saying, 'ding dong'.

"Hello?" He questioned, now really wasn't the time for distractions, he had work to do. The other end of the line kept on talking and he didn't even have time to process the information. All he could think about was, 'how am I going to get home for this?'. He needed to be home in 4 days. He had four days to tell management, get a flight, a flight back, and to find an outfit for the event.

"Ok, sure. Yes, I will. Tell her I said good luck." It was his mother. His sister was supposed to be getting married in four days, and he had totally forgotten about the date. He knew it was going to be December 31st, but he had forgotten that today was the 27th. Or the fact that this whole month was December. "Love you, bye bye." Panic mode: activated.

He spent the rest of the afternoon trying to get their manager to let him go home. It wasn't easy, it was comeback season and the boys had a lot of promotions to attend. This comeback season had to be big, after the events of covid-19, people still had to social distance and wear face coverings. Of course, some of these rules were optional, but they were idols and had to protect their health way more than the average person.

You would think that having diets, and constant exercise would boost your immune system. It definitely would, as long as you had a healthy balance. The lack of sleep, but constant work and production tore their bodies apart. They caught colds way more often and the flu always hit them like a hurricane.

"Hyung?" Jungkook wandered around the bighit building, searching for Hoseok. It was 8, Hoseok was supposed to be helping members learn the dance. "Oh- there you are!" He shouted, it held more annoyance in it than confusion. "Aren't you coming?"

"Oh, right. I'm sorry. Let me wrap this up, and then-" He was interrupted by the maknae,
"No! You are already late. You should have done it before, come on!" Hoseok was trying to be less sensitive, but he couldn't help but feel as if he had done something terribly wrong. He felt like a child getting scolded by his mother. He nodded sadly, and got up from the bench to walk to the practice room. Jungkook lead, taking big strides, almost as if he was trying to get away from him.

Hoseok was genuinely sorry, his brain was crammed with things to do. He had so many deadlines to meet, and so many things to do to prepare for the wedding, he completely forgot that didn't have a tuxedo! Let alone one that fit with the theme of the wedding. He hadn't prepared wishes for the two, or thought of a meal or snack to bring. He hadn't done anything but worry about his own work.

"Hyung!" He hadn't realized he dazed off. His eyes were glossy and he looked ready to cry, but the tears just wouldn't fall. No one seemed to noticed. No one seemed to care. "Aren't you going to try? At all?!" Namjoon seemed to be getting more irritable as the promotion checklist was made longer. "I get you are the best dancer, but please. You don't have to not try your best to help us on purpose just so you can be the best."

Intentional or not, the boys didn't stand up for Hoseok. All they did was nod in agreement. "Selfish, selfish." Jungkook teased. And although Hoseok should have explained himself, he should have told them how stressed he was, he couldn't. His mouth was glued shut.

~~~~

Today, January 2nd. The wedding was over, but the schedule for the boys were still packed and loaded with all sorts of tedious tasks to do. Hoseok was in his studio, working on a song for his new mixtape. Hoseok had checked off everything on his promotion list, and wanted to see if anyone needed help.

Eager to find a member to go help, he quickly got up from his chair (which Jungkook had gotten him for Christmas) and grabbed his coat, which hung on the coat rack across the room. He usually kept his room quite warm, it gave it a homey feel, which he really liked. The hallways of the company were freezing, and if you dared to step into them without a jacket, there was no doubt you would catch a cold the next morning.

The hallways seemed awfully quiet. Usually you could hear the echos of the maknaes playing around, wrestling in the hallways. Jimin normally didn't participate in these actions, but rather cheered them on from the sidelines. If Jin was feeling up to it, he would try to take on Jungkook. (most of the time he would lose, but it was still fun)

He decided he would try Namjoon first, he was always very busy as the leader. He knocked on the door, and got no response. He thought Namjoon just had his headphones on and couldn't hear anything, so he let himself in. Namjoon wasn't there.

He tried Yoongi next. Nothing. Jungkook. Nothing. Taehyung. Nothing. Jin. Nothing. Jimin. Nothing. Where had they all gone? He decided to go look at the dorms, noone. He called them, nothing.

He was getting worried. He hurriedly marched to his manager's room, only to find that he was peacefully working on his laptop. He rushed into the room in panic. "Woah, Hoseok, what's wrong?"

"The boys.... Where did they.... Go?" The manager looked more or less, confused.
"They didn't tell you? They wen to the movies, they left half an hour ago! They said they asked you if you wanted to come and you said no. Remember?"
"No! They never asked me!"

Hoseok's eyes turned glossy again. "Don't cry Hoseok. I'm sure it's just a miss understanding." Hoseok didn't think so. Ever since that one dance practice, he had been so stressed, everytime someone asked him to help them with a dance move, or a section of the cheoreo, he turned them down and simply said, 'ask Jimin.'.

He swears he didn't mean to cry. But the next thing he knew, he was sobbing into his manager's chest. This was so embarrassing. His eyes went all puffy and red and he could barely see through all the tears that glossed over his eyes. His body felt heavy and he had no control over himself. "Look at me, Hoseok." He didn't, he didn't want to because he was so embarrassed. "Look." He repeated. "They did not forget about you."

Hoseok knew it, they didn't forget about him. They excluded him on purpose. He couldn't decipher what was worse, being forgotten, or being left out purposely. That's when he figured out why he was crying. Being excluded on purpose was worse. And that's what had just happened to him.

After he had somewhat brought himself together, the manager spoke again. "Go get yourself a treat, I can see how stressed you are. When you are done, go get some sleep." In his hand was a $20 bill. (i don't know what country all my readers live in so here is african, european, and korean, in that order, 1977.50 Rand [CFP franc], €16.7, 21836.20 won) {please don't attack me if itś wrong-}

Hoseok nodded as a way to say thank you, because he wasn't in the mood to speak at the moment. His manager must have understood, and waved to the younger as he walked out the door. Hoseok waved back, and walked out the company building to his car. The big van the other 6 used to get here wasn't one of the vehicles parked aimlessly amongst the parking lot. He sighed, thinking about it again.

~~~~

"Oh, hi guys. I brought you some cake.. If you want it." He tried to sound all cherry and excited, like the Hoseok the others were used to, but his voice came out shaky and afraid. Fragile.
"Go away Hoseok, no one wants your cake. You probably poisoned it or something." Yoongi grumbled, he wasn't one to be mean; (none of them were) so it shocked Hoseok.

He was offended. It hurt him more than anything that anyone had ever done or said to him. He could feel his heart skip a beat. His head dropped, his palms shook. He dropped the cake. The frosting covered the floor like paint on a canvas. His legs trembled, he couldn't feel anything. He felt numb. He used to be in so much pain, and now he couldn't feel anything. He couldn't do anything except for let his body drag him out the door. He ran. And he ran far.

And he did go away. He ran out the door. No food, no money, no clothes, no water. Nothing. He didn't need bangtan. He would never need them ever again. He would go off to his family to start a solo career there, where he would be appreciated. Where he wasn't so stressed. Everything would be fine. He didn't need bangtan.

~~~~

It was only when he had ran further than he imagined that he realized he messed up. He needed the boys.

He was soaked in rain and the mud that covered the ground. His jacket was no use anymore as it had torn up on a branch overnight. His feet were covered in ant bites, the track also ran up his leg. He felt faint, but he kept walking.

He was going home.

~~~~

~at the dorm~ (ooo something new again)

"I can not believe he just- ran off like that. He is such a baby." Jungkook was next to furious. He couldn't help but want to punish Hoseok like he was his dongsaeng. Jungkook felt so betrayed, after everything the boys had done for him, he just felt as if he was better than everyone else? "I'm so mad at him.." He stormed off, going into the older's room.

On his bed side table lie a picture of Hoseok and Jimin together. They were at a dance competition and the two had been so excited. Jimin couldn't seem to get the dance right, so Hoseok had spent his whole day teaching him. Jungkook couldn't help but feel angry. "Stupid." He grabbed the frame.

He let it sit in his hand for a while before his hands begun to shake. He really wanted to throw it, he really did. But he didn't feel enough power within him to break it. He didn't feel as if he had the rights to. "I can't." He mumbled to himself. Anyone who walked into the room right now would think that he was crazy. That he was talking to ghosts.

He used all of the will power in his mind to try and throw the frame. But he felt like he was stuck in the position. He would feel bad if he did throw it. He set the frame down, it meant so much to Hoseok. It reminded him of how far he had come, how many people he had beside him to support him when he fell.

Apparently, now was different.

He had no one to catch him. No one.

~~~~

"Has anyone seen Hoseok? He said he would help me today." Namjoon said, he needed Hoseok to help him with his solo part of the dance.
"Probably ditched." Suga said, his voice was very stern, and held little to no worry.
"But it's almost 11pm! He said he would help me at 9." The leader of the group whined. He sounded genuinely concerned, unlike the older, although early he was next to angry with Hoseok.

"I'm getting worried."
"Don't worry about him, he'll be fine."

~~~~

"Ok. That's it, I'm going to look for him. It's been almost twenty four hours!"
"Do you think it would be necessary to call the police?"
"You can't call them until it's been forty eight hours. I'm going to look around outside."

~~~~

Hoseok trudged past each tree, each bush, and each pile of mud. He was cold and he didn't feel well at all. His nose was running, his hands shaking, and cool shivers ran down his spine. He felt like tiny bugs were crawling inside of his skin. His heart pounded as he heard things in the bushes. Snakes.

He couldn't seem to gather all the energy to run, yet he was terrified. All he could do was walk along, letting his fear transform into a dwindling anxiety. As the rain started to fall, his eyelids felt heavier. Black dots danced in his vision, he blinked rapidly to make them go away. He could see their house, it was right there. He could hear the members chattering and they seemed alarmed.

He was within 10 feet away when he heard someone shout his name, "Hoseok!" He couldn't even focus on the lack of honorifics that were supposed to be used by Namjoon. He was around 5 feet away when he felt a pair of arms latch onto him and slowly lay him to the ground as his eyes shut and his body went limp.

He felt conscious, he could hear the members voices calling out to him, but he couldn't bring himself to respond. He felt trapped in sleep, somewhat like a coma. He could hear everyone panicking around him. He heard beeping around him, like a heart monitor.

His conscious panicked as he heard the beeps slow down to a barely manageable pace. His hearing went fuzzy. Words sounded like jumbled up sounds, soon enough to mesh together into one long beep.

And then he couldn't feel anything else.

He saw everything he had ever done flash before his eyes, his dance competition with Jimin. His debut date, his first competition win.

And then it went black again.

"Selfish!" A voice screamed. It sounded oddly familiar, like their maknae. Jungkook. He felt a wall enclose on him as more darkness filled the room. The hospital bed was no longer there, just black.

Nothing to hear, nothing to see, nothing to feel. No one to love him.

He felt hopeless. And then he heard another voice. It was his Jin-hyung's. "Baby, wake up please. We love you so much." His voice was laced with panic and he sounded alarmed. He couldn't focus on the deep concern or how it wavered like he was about to cry. He wanted to see his face. So he opened his eyes. Gasps filled the room, like they were waiting on his arrival.

"Hoseokie, love. Good morning. We missed you."

"Did- Did I- d-d-die?" He stumbled on his words.

"Of course not baby.."

"You saved me?"

"Not this time. But we definitely will next time. Next time you fall," Jin looked at everyone in the room. The other 5 band members looked scared. "We will be there to catch you."

~~~~

Ay yo. I'm satisfied. I have a love-hate relationship with the ending, but other than that I really like this one. I hope you guys have a great rest of your day/night. This took up 7 google doc pages. I don't know why i needed to say this, but there. Wala. bam. Pow. chow. (i dont know what im doing anymore.)
Also, not related to bts but I finally found my stray kids bias.

Han !

Anyway,

~Suga requests open~