"Look at those idiots," Natasha huffed, tossing her magazine on the bar top, "they sit there like two lovesick teenagers without the balls to tell each other how they feel. It's...gross."

"It's gross? Love is gross?"

"Yeah, Tony, it is when it looks like that. I swear, I have to do everything myself around here." She took the last drink from her glass, taking down the dark liquid in one swallow before slamming the glass on the bar with a definitive nod at her own resolve. "I'm doing this."

"Hey, hold on," Tony stood and grabbed her arm before she could get away, "don't you think that if they were ready to do something about it themselves, they would?"

"Yeah, you would sure think so. But since they can't get off their asses about it, it's time for a little loving nudge into the water."

~~~

Your hands trembled so much that you could barely read the words on the paper, the letters hazing together from the motion that you couldn't stop. "Pool party?" you muttered, feeling your nerves begin to build even more. "Natasha, you're such a bitch."

"Who's a bitch?"

"Hmm?" you startled, turning to face Bucky, who had been sitting so quietly on the other side of the lounge from you that you easily could have missed him. "Oh, it's nothing. Sorry to interrupt your reading."

"This?" he scoffed, tossing his book on the table next to the couch. "This is crap. I'd rather talk to you anyway." He stood up with a quiet grumble at the sound of his bones cracking, stretching for a moment before making his way to the couch that held you and dropping down at your side. "Gimme."

You handed the invitation to him slowly, but he stopped and took your hand instead. "You're shaking," he noted quietly, "what's going on?"

"Nothing," you sighed, pulling your hand away from his, "it's just...I don't really...I don't feel comfortable at things like that. But I know that if I don't go, I'll hear nothing but hell from Nat."

"I'm not a big fan either, but what's your deal? Personally, I've got an aversion to rust."

"It's a pool party," you replied, looking at him like the answer should have been obvious. "I've got an aversion to swimsuits..." you stopped, turning away, "...and um, too much sun and...um...chlorine..."

"Hold up, are you being serious right now?" he asked with a shake of his head, pushing up and turning to face you straight on. "You're worried about how you'll look, aren't you? Is that what this is?"

"No...it's not...it just..."

"Stop it."

"Buck, really it's okay-"

"No, it's not," he insisted, "it's not okay for you to see yourself as anything other than...beautiful...alright?"

"Easy for you to say," you scoffed, "have you seen you? Listen," you paused with a quiet cough and waved him away casually to stand, "it's fine, don't worry about me. Are you gonna go to it?"

"I 'spose I have to, or Romanoff will have my hide. Same for you, (Y/N), so don't let me down," he smiled, rising up to stand with you. "And hey, if you don't want to wear a suit, just wear what you want. Who cares? The point is to have fun, and if anyone has anything to say about it...party's over."

~~~

The day of the party came and despite coming up with a half dozen excuses as to why you couldn't make it, Natasha had blasted through each one and now you had no choice but to show up or face the wrath that Bucky had mentioned. If there could be any consolation, at least you knew that he would be there and he knew how much you didn't want to be. He would understand and maybe even help you hide a little bit if you were lucky.

A loud knock on your door came just as you were about ready to go and you startled, not expecting anyone to show up. You grabbed your small bag that was filled with sunscreen, a few books, and music to keep you occupied long enough for Nat to be satisfied and to let you leave. "FRIDAY, who is it?" you whispered, looking down at your outfit, a nice cover-up over the suit that you really didn't want anyone to see.

"It's Mr. Barnes, Miss."

"Okay," you sighed in relief, "let him in please." You pulled your wrap around you a little tighter and slung your bag over your arm, ready to go as the door opened and he paused, looking at you in a way that you weren't quite certain how to take. You took notice of what he was wearing too, finding his choice of black swim trunks appropriate, but the fitted black long-sleeved t-shirt didn't seem the best idea for swimming. "Don't you think you're gonna get a little too hot?"

"It's fine."

"Hey, I'm not exactly showing skin either, so if you're good, I'm good."

He grabbed your hand with a bit of a nervous smile and led you to the rooftop pool without saying another word. You could tell that he was tense about the whole thing, but he didn't really have any reason to be as far as you knew. Keeping watch on him was helping you to keep your mind off of your own apprehensions, and before you knew it, you were both casually sitting along the pool edge with your feet dangling in the cool water and talking without a care as to where you were.

"You're not really going to sit there in that are you?" Nat chided, dropping down next to Bucky. "Who wears long sleeves to a pool party?"

"I do," he replied flatly.

"Okay," she sighed, looking past him to you, "so what about you, (Y/N)? You just gonna sit in that cover up all day or will your skin be seeing sun at some point?"

"I'm fine too, thanks."

"Alright, I can see that I'm not going to get anywhere. Suit yourselves." She pushed up and away from the pool edge and took her leave, much to your relief. Someone with the build and beauty that she had would never understand that you didn't feel comfortable with showing yourself too much, but at least she wasn't pushing you any further.

You gave Bucky a gentle nudge with your shoulder once she was gone, leaning in closer to speak quietly, "so really, what's with the shirt, Buck?"

He looked around to gauge the distance around him from everyone else, but still leaned in just to keep the volume as low as he could. "I don't like showing my arm. It's not exactly something that anyone wants to see."

"Your arm is out more than it's not? Your uniform has the sleeve removed. I don't follow."

"Not the arm itself," he sighed, looking away, "it's where they attached it. I could've done better with my own needle and thread. It's appalling."

"Buck, come on, I've seen it myself, and it's not-"

Before you could finish, you felt a breeze behind you that turned out to be Natasha running past, grabbing your cover up and yanking it over your head to leave you in your swim suit just as she pushed the two of you into the pool. Somehow, Clint had managed to free Bucky of his shirt at the same time, leaving you both in the exact state that you were trying to avoid.

"Nat, you really are a bitch!" you hollered, only to hear her laughter in the distance. "That's just great," you groaned, feeling your heartbeat speeding up beyond your control. "Oh come on, not now..."

"Hey, you okay?" Bucky asked, swimming up next to you. "You don't look right. Come on," he urged, grabbing your hand pausing when you didn't follow.

"Can't...breathe," you gasped, "oh...shit...not now..."

"Okay, you've got this, doll, just come with me," he urged calmly, though inside he felt much the same as you looked right now; he couldn't give that any attention however, keeping his focus on you. "I'll get you somewhere safe, I promise. Just let me get you out of here, okay?"

"Mmm hmm," was all you could say, allowing him to swing his arms under you and lift you as he climbed out of the pool. Once on the pool deck, everyone silenced, and in the corner of your eye you could see remorse washing over Nat. Maybe she hadn't realized just how uncomfortable you were, and you already knew how bad she was feeling before she had a chance to utter an apology. As she tried to make her way towards you, Bucky threw her a cold stare that had her backing away.

Bucky brought you to your own room, knowing that it was the one place that he had seen you fully comfortable, and hoping that he could stop your panic before it could get out of your control. He sat you in a chair by your window, kneeling in front of you with both of your hands in his. "Alright, (Y/N), slow it down. Breathe slower, okay? In for five, out for five, remember?"

"This is...stupid..."

"It's not stupid," he replied immediately, "it's real and we'll get it under control. Now breathe."

You had gone through panic attacks with Bucky there before, and he was adept at knowing how to keep you on track without coming across as too pushy or authoritative. He also never once made you feel bad or embarrassed about it, and understood that sometimes these things just happen no matter how you tried to stop them. "You're...a great...friend," you panted, finally closing your eyes to concentrate on your breathing.

He didn't reply right away, his focus fully on watching you and counting your seconds aloud to keep you on track. But once he felt like you were regaining control, he decided in a split second that he was going to address the elephant in the room once and for all.

"Is that all I am? A friend?"

"Is that all you want to be?"

"Seriously, (Y/N)?" he smiled gently. "I used to be so much better at this, talking to ladies and knowing how to act, but I guess that I've never really found someone that I felt more for, ya know? So, no, that's not all I want to be." Bucky cleared his throat, now seeming far more uncomfortable than he was only moments before when he had been stripped of his cover at the pool. "Um, so anyway...how do you feel-"

"I don't want that to be all either. I thought you knew that and it wasn't what you wanted so I never said-"

He broke your words with a kiss, much to your surprise and causing another hitch in your breaths that made him pull back. "You okay? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you, I just couldn't wait any more."

"I'm good," you smiled, taking his face in your hands, "it was a good surprise, promise."

"Okay," he murmured and moved in again, but of course, the door to your room flung open before he could connect again.

"(Y/N), I'm so sorry!" Nat barged forward urgently, her hands up in front of her as she tried to apologize. "I didn't know that you...oh! Oh..." she stopped, a wide grin growing in her expression, "maybe I'm not so sorry. Maybe I'm not sorry at all, actually."

"Oh, she's gonna be," Bucky whispered, leaning in for a fast kiss before pushing away to give chase. "You better run, Romanoff!"

"But I was right!" she whined as she backed through the door and into the hallway. "How can you be mad if I was right?"

"Try me," he threatened, bursting forward with enough speed to nearly grab her arm, but she just escaped his grip by a fraction of a second. When she was out of his sight and had rounded the corner in her panic to flee, he laughed to himself quietly and shut the door again, this time taking care to be sure that it was locked. "FRIDAY, keep her running until I say to stop. Now," he smiled and turned back to you, "where were we?"