♪ Say Something- A Great Big World ♪

The unreliability of the endurance of everything from trivial objects to massive existences is inevitable in this universe but I never really registered this phenominal process of decay until it hit my mother. Those were the days when it felt like someone had clawed out my insides and left me with this gaping hole that sucked life out of me with every moment I struggled to...exist but souls who struggle to exist and merely exist experience the death of their yearnings and longings, desires and cravings. It feels like you are, still you cease to be.

Gradually, fate dragged me over the sizzling embers of hurt and scattered my ashes into oblivion. However, going through that ache, I made this fatal mistake; I thought I had gone through it all. Illusioning myself to have beared the extent of suffering, I drowned myself into silent numbness and imagined that it'll never return but I was wrong.

For, later on, there had arrived moments in my life where I had seen drunken sunsets in someone's gloriously golden eyes and let down all my guards altruistically. I had handed over the strings of my vulnerability to someone's delicately artistic fingers that had spun a honey grey web of fragility and love. The broken pieces inside me had slowly healed while swaying around someone's light steps.

This someone who had blessed me with poetic sensations.

This someone whose smile had lit up my entire universe in a split second.

This someone who was not mine but belonged to me in ways I couldn't put in words.

This someone whose fingers had caressed every feature of my face yet never touched it.

This someone who was elysian to such an extent that it made me feel like I had been walking in a dream.

A dream sprinkled with fairydust and woven into the magical symphonies of long lost glee.

A dream so beautiful to be true.

This someone who had never heard her name from my lips yet her name was all I could hear.

Hazel.

Hazel.

Hazel.

"Hazel...say something..," I sobbed by her bed as my body crumbled to a million pieces.

Everything had passed by my eyes in a strange fog and I didn't really remember anything. I could recall Dad consoling her mom. I could recall Marrie grabbing my collar and slapping me on the face. I could recall a very nervous Doris standing in the dimly lit corridor of the hospital. I could recall it all like a robot. Their images moved in my head mechanically but I discovered that none of them aroused any response out of me. I had looked past them as if they didn't exist. Nothing existed..except Hazel. She was everywhere...

...yet nowhere.

I remembered inhaling the sweetly pungent smell of her blood back then.

-"That's none of your business!"-

I remembered holding her motionless body in my arms and tearing up.

-"Put me down!"-

I remembered having her crimson paint all over my body.

-Don't know why..but I have this strange obsession of colors.-

I remembered clenching the white sheets all over her and falling apart.

-It's white. I like white. White is the color of purity, peace, dreams, clouds, fantasies, angels, pearls..it's beautiful. So, I adore white.-

I remembered watching her entrapped in colourful tubes and blinking lights.

-I love living and dreaming in colors because I think every color has a life. Colors are beautiful and wondrous things to play with.-

I remembered being surrounded by all the strange beeping machines.

-"I need music."-

I remembered the faint blabber of doctors over her reports.

-"We don't discuss reports in cars. We have the classrooms for that."-

I remembered being alienated from the world outside in our shattered universe.

-"Drape the curtains first."-

I remembered hearing the raindrops tapping at the window pane silently as the heavens cried for us.

- I wonder how this rain, that urges me to run outside and open my arms wide in the air, can't even make me get out of my bed?-

I remembered shaking her to open her eyes atleast once. To let me in...

-I wish to lie down here in my bed and listen to the rhythm it's creating.-

I remembered shouting at her that it was raining outside in the hopes of getting a response.

-I want to enjoy this music of nature while I burn.-

I remembered sobbing all alone and whispering that I couldn't bear losing her smile.

-"What you don't know is that a smile is the easiest and simplest thing that helps makes the important things in life easier."-

I remembered telling her that she needed to come back for her mom.

-I owe her everything in my life.-

I remembered insisting that Doris was waiting for her.

-"I hope to see you again."-

I remembered whispering I couldn't believe it all.

-My imaginations have taken me too far that I believe the unbelievable easily.-

I remembered cursing myself and apologising to her a million times for what I had caused her.

-No, I won't fall for Roxen Dale. Because I don't want him to hurt me.-

I remembered telling her she had done wrong to come after a useless guy like me!

-Because what I think is that, I'm falling for the guy who's writing me letters.-

I remembered crying that I had never expected things to turn out this way.

-His letters occur at the most unexpected times.-

I remembered begging for a miracle to undo it all.

-Maybe he does magic.-

I remembered begging by her bed to come back to me for the last time.

-"We didn't have a commitment."-

I remembered crying continuously for hours by her side.

-"Change the song, please."-

I remembered withering to a crumpled mess and crying out that nothing was right.

-"Is there somethin' wrong with him?"-

I remembered telling her over and over that I loved her.

-"You brought me here just to tell this?"-

I remembered confessing that I had been writing her the letters all along.

-As you discovered me, let me DISCOVER YOU.-

I remembered breaking apart for we couldn't meet that evening.

-For I see, beyond the skyscrapers of Amsterdam, the way our horizons meet.-

I remembered telling her how hurt I was and that she was my only solace.

-If you've hurt your knee while falling for me, then please, let me bandage it for you.-

I remembered repeating like a mantra that I hadn't seen the gold melting in her eyes for two days.

-It's been two days but it feels like centuries.-

I remembered.

I remembered it all.

I remembered it so well that even when that pang of terrible pain shot through my head and everything blurred before my eyes, I knew what to say. They were holding the remnants of my scattered soul and carrying me away from her. A horrible ache enveloped my senses and I knew it was over. I knew we were done. I couldn't breathe and suddenly it felt like all the oxygen from the world had vanished into thin air. Poof! Like an exploding supernova, I let it all shatter me into an unrepairable substance. I didn't remember any further but wandering in the valley of severe suffering, I didn't forget saying one thing for the last time before I drowned myself in a blissful unconciousness.

It was her name.

-"Hazel. Call me Hazel."-

Author's Note

I have never been so broken and proud at the same time. I am never satisfied with what I write but what you just read is my BEST creation. It couldn't be done better and I'm proud of it.

But it has left me so drained..I feel hollow. Very hollow. My love for this story is endless and no book of mine can take it's place. Thanks for sticking with me, Imaginators! I'm proud of you all. :')

Also..this is NOT the end. Do not cry..I love you all. ♥♡

The song for this chapter is "Say Something" by A Great Big World. I LOVE THIS SONG more than I can ever tell. :')♥♡

Don't forget to vote and comment. ♥

Much Love xX
Hazel *-*