I grunted as I washed the last of the plates in the zinc, it was actually a miracle I completed washing this damn plates without barging into Samuel's room and breaking every single bone in his body to use for crunchy snacks, for real this whole place was a disaster. I just don't know if it will kill him to do the dishes, or maybe actually not leave particles of food on his plate. Every damn thing just sticks to the plate. And then I have to soak it first before washing, or risk breaking a fingernail, and I love, I mean, cherish my nails. Like, can't he just be like Ademide? For real, the dude was a neat freak, cleans the kitchen every damn time he enters it.

Well, speaking of Ademide, I've been doing quite a good job of avoiding him ever since I chased him out of my room, and that was two days ago. Haven't really seen him since then, and I know he must presently be at work now. Yes, he definitely was. I really don't know how long I plan to keep this up, but I just wish I could just not see him forever. The thought of him leaves me sad every single time, and each and every day, I try to come up with what ifs to make myself happy. Like what if the girl he was talking to wasn't really his girlfriend, what if he wasn't playing, and actually liked me, his words and action look like it, what if he was actually been sincere and doesn't really know what he did, or I think he did. And every single time I always remind myself to snap out of it because I know what I heard, and saw, and no guy who was sensitive enough would hurt a girl he like the way he hurt me, that only proves the fact that I'm just a game to him, and I was a fool to fall. A stupid fool.

I snapped out of my stupid state of remorse, washed my hands, and cleaned my hand with a kitchen napkin before exiting the kitchen. Immediately I got out of the kitchen, I saw Ademide coming out of his room, dressed in black grey pants, blue shirt, and a grey waistcoat, with his briefcase, looking handsome as usual. I felt my heart jump a bit at the sight of him, I quickly retraced my steps and headed right back for the kitchen, chanting to avoid him! Avoid him! Like a mantra in my head.

"Mary." I heard him call my name, but I ignored it. "Mary!" He called again, this time sounding more stern. I quickened my steps, walking into the kitchen. It wasn't until I was there that I started wondering what I could possibly do there, gosh, stupid me again.

"Mary!" I felt a grip on my arm, and soon I was pulled back. I turned to face him, anger radiating in my eyes, wanting to know what he wanted. "What exactly is wrong?"

"You gripping my arm is," I stated.

His face hardened, letting go of my arm. He dropped his briefcase and rubbed his hand on his face, looking at my face intently. "I need you to talk."

"Say, what exactly?" I asked.

"Are we going over this again?" He asked, sounding quite frustrated. "Mary, I know there has to be a reason. You can't just go from wanting me to avoiding me like a plague. There has to be something I did. Just let me know what it is, and I will adjust."

He had me very confused here, I didn't know what to make of it. The look on his face was curious, confused, conflicted, and hurt. Why? And his voice sounded hoarse like he was trying to bottle up some emotions. Now, what the hell was this guy playing at?

"What if I don't have a reason," I deadpanned. I know I could actually bring up the topic of him picking up his girlfriend call, and then neglecting me like a common whore which I'm definitely no. But that would only make him feel like he has an edge over me. He's gonna know that I like him, and was heartbroken because of him. And I can't afford to look so weak to him, he's only going to mock me at the end anyway. Trust me I know what I'm saying, I've heard stories, seen guys do awful things to girls, making a fool out of them, and I will be damned to be one of those girls. Already fell once, I won't go deeper into the dirt by letting him know he has a leverage over me.

"You can't just not have a reason Mary." His voice was gentle, and soft, and his face held the same gentleness, and softness. His raised his hands and touched my face, staring into my eyes deeply, and I really wanted his hand to stay where it was, foolish me leaned into his touch letting his palm caress me before I snapped out of it and stepped back from him as though he's got leprosy. For a second I saw a look of hurt flash on his face, and really wanted to believe that he was really hurt, but as you have all figured out by now I've got the biggest trust issues. "Perhaps you regret it," he looked at my face with curiosity as he said this, that actually light up a bulb in my head. Regret was something that hasn't come to my mind, yes I felt hurt and wanted to stay away from him, but regret I couldn't say. "You regret having sex with me, giving me your virginity, is that it?"

"Yes! I regret." I yelled into his face, he flinched back with his face filled with pain, real good actor. This only fueled my anger for him, "I regret everything, your touch, your kiss, I regret the fact that I let myself be so vulnerable to you. I regret letting you hurt me this much," I thought back to the feeling of hurt that I had felt that day, I remember how dirty, and used I felt, tears stung my eyes at this, threatening to fall. "I regret everything."

"Everything?" He asked in a deadly quiet voice, but the next minute a look of determination filled his face and he said, "you expect me to believe that? So you're saying you regret this?" He pulled me flush against him by the waist, I let out a gasp at the force and suddenness of the action. I placed my hands on his chest, trying to pry him off, but it was fruitless. Damn, I didn't need this now, I can't bear the closeness, and the feeling it arouses in me. "And this?" He ran his hands over my body, my waist, then across my breast. I fought the urge to let out a moan when his hand grazed my breasts which was quite hard since I wasn't wearing a bra, and I was still in my nightwear which was made out of the lightest material.

"Ademide...let me go," I breathed out, my hands still placed flat on his chest trying to pull him off. I looked up at his face to see him watching my face with that look still on his face.

"Or do you expect me to believe that you regret the feel of this." He pressed his body into mine, I let out a moan as I felt his erection pressing smoothly into my abdomen.

"Ademide..."

"Or you expect me to believe that you regret me doing this?" He said in a husky voice that was so close to my ear as he bent down and started placing kisses on my neck. I moaned when I felt him nipping at my neck, chest, forgetting that I wasn't supposed to let him leave anymore mosquito bites on my body. My eyes naturally fell close as my body reveled in the feeling of his touch, his kisses, and of him being so close. "Or this?" He jammed his lips on mine in a hard and forceful kiss, nipping at my lips, seeking entry into my mouth, and like a fool I let go of all of my senses and opened up to him. My hands that were supposed to pull him off ended up pulling him closer as I leaned deeper into him, enjoying and wanting every single moment of the kiss.

He pulled me back, resting my back against the wall deepening the kiss. His lips on mine softened, he kissed me slowly, and sensually, running his hands over my body. This was what I've tried to avoid, this guy does something to me that I have no control over, I would definitely let him take me here and now, if not for the stupid fact that I was on my damn period.

He suddenly pulled out of the kiss, chuckling a bit before saying, "you regret it indeed." Everything came washing down on me as he said this, his voice was mocking and self assured. I fought the urge to let my tears fall as I opened my eyes and looked at him to see him watching me with a coy smile. He placed one final kiss on my lips and adjusted his clothes, he picked up his briefcase and said in a dead serious tone staring deep into my eyes, "when you are ready to let me know what exactly is wrong, and ready to work out whatever this thing between us is, you know where to find me."

He turned on his heels, and left. I slumped onto the floor tears clouding my vision. I cried because of my stupidity, and for my very low self control. I just can't believe I let him do this to me, I hated myself for been si weak to his advances. After minutes of sitting down and doing nothing but cry, I realized I needed someone to talk to, and I knew who to go to exactly.

I stood up and ran over to my room, I unplugged my phone from the socket and dialed his number, the number of my one confidant and mentor. Mr Seun, my mum's colleague and a great friend of mine, he is actually the only one I feel free enough to talk to, he is someone whom I'm always honest with, someone whom I try my possible best not to hide things from.

"10am, you called at the right time, I was going to call you to let you know Funmi was around, you said you wanted to meet her." I heard his calm voice say from the other end, note this he calls me 10am because of my mum's influence, and Funmi is the name of his fiancee.

"Hi sir." I sniffed.

"10am are you okay? You sound like you are crying," he said in a concerned filled voice.

"Well, that's because I'm crying." I said.

"What happened?"

"Can I see you now? Can I come over to your place?" I asked, holding back a sob.

"Of course you can."

"Okay, I'm coming." I said and hung up the call.

So, what do y'all think?
Yay, or nay?
© Mary Aden.