After our movie ended, things were kind of awkward. Even though I knew things would be, I just had to say it. He was kind and everything I could ask for in a best friend.

We sat in silence for a long moment. Devin kept his gaze on the TV. "Devin," I said quietly. "I appreciate everything you've done to help me. You don't know how much it means to me to have someone on my side that unconditionally supports me without telling me what I should or shouldn't have done. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate Kolleen, too, because she tells me how it is, but thank you."

He shook his head, still not looking at me. "You deserve it." His voice sounded strained. He stood and turned his back to me. "You deserve a lot of good things, Jes." He smiled at me over his shoulder before walking to the kitchen. "I should probably go."

"Want to hang out tomorrow?" I asked hurriedly.

"I work the night shift tomorrow, so the usual spot at the usual time." He reached for the doorknob but abruptly turned to me instead. His eyes searched mine. I wasn't sure what they were looking for, but I hoped they found it. "Are you asking me on a date?" he mumbled.

I suppressed a shiver. Date was the last word I wanted to use, but there was no denying it. A date was exactly what it was. I gave a single nod that was so slight I wasn't sure if he'd even notice it. "Calling it a date is kind of..." I shrugged a little. "But yeah." I found I couldn't look at him. My face felt like it was red and hot.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Jes," he said, a smile in his voice.

Once the door was closed behind him, I sank to the floor. Why was this so hard?

Kolleen's door creaked as it opened and I made myself stand up. "I did it," I told her.

Her eyebrows shot up. "Did what?"

"I asked him out."

She gasped the slightest bit and ran to hug me. "I'm so proud of you! See? I knew he liked you."

"I know." Truthfully, I wasn't sure she should have been proud of me. I briefly hugged her back before pulling away. "I'm going to go to my room. I have a lot of homework to do." She should wait to be proud of me when I manage to get through the date.

While I was trying to get my work done, I couldn't concentrate. I kept imagining what could possibly happen. He could try to kiss me. I could show up wearing the wrong thing. We could end up being silent for the whole time we're there, just eating and trying not to stare at each other. Things were normally comfortable around us, but this was a date. Our first date. It shouldn't change things too much, but I was fairly certain it would.

Eventually, I gave up trying to get anything done and settled for watching random videos on YouTube. At some point I ended up falling asleep, because the next thing I knew my alarm was going off.

After school, I tried to get myself ready for the date, but no matter what I did, I had a feeling I was doing too much. Whether it was wearing fresh makeup, actually putting on a skirt, or leaving the jeans but wearing a cuter top, I wasn't satisfied.

At some point, I gave up and went to get Kolleen's advice. I banged on her door. "Kol! I need you!"

She glanced up from her laptop. "Sure thing." She looked at me and nodded. "You look nice."

"I redid my makeup and changed. Does it look okay?"

She frowned. "It looks fine. You look like you're going on a date. I mean, that's what it is, so." She gave me a shrug and looked at her laptop again.

"But does it look like I'm trying too hard?"

She sighed and turned to me after moving her computer to the side. "Jes, look. Redoing your makeup is a normal thing to do. Changing your clothes is normal. Do you look nicer than half the times you've been together? Yes. Trust me, he won't complain. You could show up in sweats and he'd be happy, I'm sure. He would appreciate you like this more, but still. It's okay to be nervous. He probably is too."

"What should I do if he thinks I'm going to be his girlfriend?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Jessie. If you don't want to be his girlfriend, why are you going on a date with him?"

I bit my lip. "Because everyone thinks I should?"

She rubbed her face vigorously. "If that's the case, text him and say you're not coming." She groaned and dropped her hands. "If you don't want to be with him, you're wasting everyone's time with this. Think a little harder about what you do and don't want. After you figure that out, try again."

I shook my head. "I have to go, though. I told him I'd be there, so I'm going. That's all there is to it." I sighed. I was aware I was making things complicated, but I was scared. My feet had gotten cold when I asked him out and had only been getting colder since. "You said it, my mother said it. There must be at least a little truth to what you guys said, right? You both think he's into me and I'm into him. You both told me that I needed to stop messing around. This is me not messing around. Okay?" I walked out of her room, slamming the door behind me.

If this is what it took for them to stop, I was going to do it. While I wasn't entirely unwilling – in fact, I was thrilled that he wanted to at least try with me – there was a part of me that was digging in my heels. I wasn't sure I'd be able to fight that part. My fears had no basis, yet they were on the verge of taking over. I just told myself that I only needed to get through this date and it would be okay. If things went smoothly, I would be able to relax.

There was a lot riding on this date for me emotionally.

When I showed up at the diner, Devin was just pulling up. He grinned at me when he got out. "Hey," he said. When I got closer I could smell that he'd put on cologne. It smelled amazing. I could have leaned in and sniffed him, but I refrained.

"Hi," I said in return. So far it was normal. We weren't acting any different. It didn't feel different. But then, we were still in the parking lot.

We went in and took our regular seats and ordered the same things we normally got. Nothing changed. I was about ready to take a deep breath of relief when his radio began crackling. He listened intently to it but I was lost on what was being said. His eyes closed. "I'm afraid I won't be able to stay," he said as he stood. "I'm being called. You can stay. I'll be back." He hesitated a moment, eyes flickering across my face, before he finally turned and walked out the door.

I leaned back in my chair, half relieved, half disappointed. This never happened when we hung out as friends. Of course this would happen on our first official date. Of course. What did I expect? He was a police officer. I only wished he could take an actual break without worrying about being called away.

After a couple of minutes, the waitress came back with our drinks. She eyed his empty chair. "Should I wait to bring his order out?" she asked.

I nodded. "He said he'd be back."

She gave me a soft smile. "He gets called out a lot. Sorry it had to happen on your date, though. That's a bit of a bummer. He's usually only gone for about half an hour, so don't worry too much." She sat my glass down and carried his back into the kitchen.

Thirty minutes. That wasn't all that long. I sipped my soda and watched out the window. It was fine. But as that thirty minutes turned into an hour, I began to feel like it wasn't okay. At the hour and a half mark I began to wonder if he was okay. When that turned into two hours, I checked my phone. The place was going to close in less than an hour. How much longer did he expect me to wait? Was he not back yet because he thought I'd left?

The waitress came and refilled my glass. She sighed and shook her head. "I wonder what's taking so long," she said.

"How did you know we were on a date?" I asked.

She smiled. "You guys are always here together, so I just thought that, maybe, he'd actually found a girl." She sucked in a breath. "Wait, are you dating? I'm so sorry for assuming if you aren't."

I returned her smile. "No, you're right. Tonight was our first official date, actually. We'd been coming as friends before."

A cruiser slowly pulled into a spot and I watched Devin's eyes widen when he saw me. I waved and he jumped out of his car. "Well, looks like your man is back," the waitress said. "Officer Williams is a good person. I'll go get your orders." With a last smile, she walked away.

Devin jogged to the table and dropped in the chair next to mine. "I'm so sorry that took so long. I was worried you'd leave before I got back."

I shook my head. "I wouldn't. Especially not when I know you're coming back." I blushed and took a sip of my drink as the waitress sat our food down.

"Thanks," he told her. He grabbed my hand under the table. I almost yanked it away but fought it. "You could have eaten, you know."

"I wanted to wait for you."

He paused, but I couldn't bring myself to meet his eyes. "Okay."

After a short silence that didn't feel at all awkward, we fell back into our normal routine. It felt natural to just be with each other as we ate, not trying to pack a lot of conversation into a short time. That was one thing me and Josh had never mastered. He seemed to only want all conversation all the time or I would be the one to force it because the silence just felt wrong.

Was this what it meant to be at ease?

When we'd finished eating, Devin held my hand under the table again. "Was it a hard job?" I asked.

"Not really, but the suspect put up a fight. I'm so sorry I was gone so long. I got called off on two more things before I could come back."

"I had started to wonder if you were coming back or if you thought I'd left so you weren't."

"I hoped you were here." He squeezed my hand. We fell into another silence. I was so happy that we were comfortable with each other. Considering we'd known each other for less than three months, this was something I never expected to happen. "There's something I need you to do," he said quietly.

"Of course. What is it?"

"I'm not sure where you shop at or where you go when you're not with me or at school, but I need you to only go to school and home for now, and when you need to, please use the store the opposite way of the school. You know the one, right?"

My chest squeezed painfully just the tiniest bit. "Why?"

He turned to me. "Could you promise me? Please?"

I frowned but nodded. "Okay." If there was one thing Josh taught me, it was to not question things. It only led to something worse than what was being asked of me.

"Same goes for Kolleen, actually."

I froze. "I'll pass it on."

"Thank you." He stroked my hand and then released it. "I have to go. Come on, I'll give you a ride."

"Okay."

I didn't want to dwell on what he'd said, so the ride was full of forced, idle chatter. He seemed to realize I was being strange, but he didn't comment on it. Our good mood was gone. For some reason, I felt jilted. Just when I was beginning to think maybe, just maybe, I was ready to date, something had to ruin it. Was I just destined to be treated this way?

Tears were beginning to well as Devin stopped in front of my building. He opened my door and I got out, thankful it was dark and he couldn't see my eyes too well. He pulled me into a hug I stiffly returned. "It's okay, Jessie," he said as he pulled away. He tucked some hair behind my ear and ran a thumb briefly over my cheek. "I promise it will all be okay. I'll text you."

I nodded and made my way inside, knowing he was watching me go.