to arie,

#####

Messenger
ERPS BALITA

Eastre:
@Ryker nasa jail ka raw?

Cal:
Totoo ba, erps?

Eastre:
Need help?

Ryker:
oo 😔😔😔😔
okay eto ang problema ko
nasabi ko mahal ko si aziah
tapos

Eastre:
Makukulong ka na nga
Ayan pa problema mo???

Ryker:
minura nya ako 🥹

Cal:
😂😂😂😂

Hala sorry, mali.
Take two.

😭😭😭😭

Ryker:
im shitting on my own pants
because aziah's not speaking to me
i cant get through her pretty head

pakiramdam ko erps nahihibang na ako hahahaha her silence is making me feel that it was wrong to tell her i love her

Cal:
Magpakulong ka na lang siguro.
Ako nahihiya sa 'yo. 😭
Ryker: i love u Aziah: pakyu
Huhuhu 😭 kawawa.

Eastre:
Ang gago HAHAHAHAHA

Ryker:
fuck u cal !!!!
stop giving me ideas 😭😭😭
i think orange will good on
me though

Eastre:
Can the both of you get
serious for once? 😀

Ryker:
i love aziah
i do
tangina di ko alam gagawin ko kapag nawala pa siya sa akin

Cal:
Hindi naman. . .siguro?

#####

Chapter 20

Napunta kami sa presinto. Of course, Rome was angry as a bull when he gained consciousness. The police bought Ryker's excuse that it was self defense, ang tanging naku-kwestiyon lang ngayon ay bakit hindi agad sinapak ni Ryker si Rome dahil pinagsalita n'ya pa ito ulit.

Ginagamot ko yung namamagang panga ni Ryker. Ang totoo nga ay halos nadaplisan lang talaga siya. Si Rome ang dumeretso sa hospital dahil halos maging pulbo na talaga. Pareho namang umurong ang mga kaso dahil pinagusap silang dalawa. Ryker didn't want to withdraw but I was the one who told him to let it go. Mas malala ang magiging kaso n'ya dahil halos hindi na makalakad si Rome.

"Huwag mo uulitin iyon," sabi ko sa kan'ya. "Ayoko nakikipagsuntukan ka."

Ngumuso siya. "Hindi mo naman ako mapipigilan manuntok lalo na kung binabastos ka na."

I held his hand and started to kiss his fists. "These hands are not made to hurt anyone, alright? Hindi naman ako na-offend sa sinabi n'ya."

Natahimik si Ryker. Batid pa rin sa mukha na badtrip siya dahil sa mga sinabi ni Rome tungkol sa akin. I wonder. . .does he believe him? At kung naniniwala man siya, does it bother him?

I know that even if I agree that Ryker is indeed hot and attractive, once his morals are not aligned with mine—I would gladly dodge a bullet. I wouldn't want to fix him. Ayoko maging tulad ni Mama na ipipilit ang paniniwala ko sa isang lalaki. Manglalaki na lang ulit siguro ako.

Pero iba si Ryker. . .I just know deep in my heart that even if what Rome said was true—it wouldn't change the fact that he loves me.

Mahal n'ya ako.

Pero kailangan ba. . .mahal ko rin siya pabalik?

"May gusto kang itanong?" He hesitantly asked, fidgeting his fingers.

"Ano?"

"K-kanina ka pa kasi tahimik. . ." Halakhak n'ya, pero ramdam ko ang kaba sa pagbitiw ng kan'yang tawa.

"Wala naman," I shook my head. "Kaya mo pa ba mag-drive? I'll call your friends for you. Pasundo ka na lang ba?"

"Ako ang maghahatid sa 'yo pauwi, hindi naman ako lasing," he said. "Malayo rin sa mata o kung saan man ang suntok n'ya sa akin. I can still drive you home safely."

"Kahit hindi na," I insisted then opened my phone to contact Lotte. "Magpapasundo na lang din ako sa friend ko."

"Aziah," he called my name, helplessly. "Okay ba talaga tayo?"

"Oo naman," I looked at him, shot him with a dubious look. "Bakit naman hindi?"

He sighed. "I love you."

"Parang gago," I snickered upon hearing him utter those words.

His eyes were effortlessly drowsy, para bang nahihimlay siya sa sarili n'yang boses. When he says those words. . .it was only as if it was natural for him to say it. Para bang parte na ito ng araw-araw n'ya.

"Wala namang magbabago 'di ba?" He chuckled nervously, as if my reactions were not the ones that he was expecting.

Wala naman.

Siguro.

I shrugged my shoulders off and helped him fix some of the things that needed his attention. Once we're done in the police station, we went to his condo. Nagpaalam na rin ako kay Mama.

The drive wasn't as fast as I was expecting. Parang kabado talaga si Ryker ngayong gabi. Hindi ko alam kung bakit parang hindi siya mapakali. Is it because he thinks that a record on the police station would ruin his reputation? Hindi naman na sila nagkaroon ng record dahil pareho silang umatras. And I doubt Rome would spread rumors, he's a talkative shit but not at his own expense. Ang pangit naman kung ipagkakalat n'yang bugbog sarado siya?

I hastily entered his password and when the door finally opened; I dragged his entire body inside his condo. I slammed him on the wall and started to kiss him. His hands managed to open the lights yet I was busy trying to navigate his mouth.

"Azia—" he grunted against my lips. "Sandali—"

"Ry," I moaned in his ears. "I miss you."

I started to kiss his neck while I was unbuckling his belt. Ang nasa isip ko lang no'n. . .baka kaya siya nag-I love you dahil kulang na siya sa sex? Ang tagal na no'ng huling beses na gumawa kami ng milagro. Walang condom sa bahay at hindi talaga namin ginagawa iyon sa kwarto ko bilang respeto pa rin kay Mama. Wala naman kasi siyang kasama sa condo n'ya; kaya sino ang rerespetuhin namin dito? Yung diffuser?

"We've been together since morning," Ryker said as he started to hold my hand. Kinuha n'ya ito mula sa pagkakahawak ko sa belt n'ya. "Ang clingy naman ng Ziah ko."

He kissed the back of my hand as he stared at me. . .lovingly which took me by surprise. No! Bakit gan'yan siya tumingin sa akin? Na para bang seryoso siya? Na para bang ako lang ang nakikita n'ya? He's not. . .serious about loving me. Mahal n'ya lang ako dahil siguro nakukuha n'ya ang gusto n'ya sa akin. That's it! He wouldn't love someone like me!

"Ziah," he kissed me on my lips. "I want us to start again, not as fuck buddies. I want your touch, not your body. I want your presence, not your availability. I want my princess. . .not someone who's just there to have sex with."

Binawi ko ang kamay ko sa kan'ya. My entire face blanched which took off the happiness from Ryker's face.

"Gago ka ba?" I hissed at him. "Can you read the mood that I just want to fuck? Ano bang pinagsasabi mo?"

Ryker widened his eyes. "Syempre hindi naman girlfriend agad! Liligawan kita!"

"Tanga!" I glared at him and immediately stormed off. Nagmamadali akong nagsuot ng sandals habang naririnig ko ang mga pahapyaw n'yang sigaw sa pangalan ko.

He's got it bad.

He wouldn't take me seriously. Alam ko naman na sa bandang dulo, dehado ako sa kan'ya. If I fall for him, he would see my weakness and he would use it against me. If he sees how vulnerable I am. . .he wouldn't want to love me ever again.

Patakbo akong sumakay ng lift. Agad ko itong pinindot para ibaba ako sa ground floor. I was praying that the available elevator on the right side was occupied so Ryker wouldn't be able to catch up with me.

Habang nasa elevator ay tumunog ang cellphone ko. Hindi ko na dapat ito titingnan pero sunud-sunod ang lumabas na mensahe mula sa isang numero na hindi ko kilala. I sighed as I took my phone out to see the messages.

From: 092********
sent a video
bye bye latin honors i guess?

Nangunot ang noo ko dahil video lang naman iyon na nakikipagsuntukan si Ryker. It's weird because I know that there were those who took videos of the scene, but I was also sure that all of them were erased because of the security. Ang weird lang din na dapat ay sa social media ko na nahagilap ang mga ito, hindi sa mismong text message.

Ziah:
Anong problema mo hahaha
Putangina
Ano bang pake ko dyan?

092********:
if you want it deleted
lets meet up @ st. andrew avenue
wag kang magdala ng kasama

I sighed as I thought it through. I could ask Lotte to be with me. Hindi naman ako tanga para hindi makipagkita at hindi magdala ng kasama.

I have a hunch who this bastard is. Pero paano n'ya nakuha yung video? I'm sure this isn't Rome, because again, he wouldn't be stupid enough to let others see that he was being beat up into a pulp.

Ilang araw ko hindi pinansin si Ryker. All of his messages were ignored. May mga selfies pa siyang pinapadala na nagpapa-cute ar kunyari ay umiiyak. Parang tanga lang talaga!

Nakipagkita na ako sa nangungulit sa akin sa St. Andrew Avenue, may malapit na coffee shop doon kaya naman doon na rin ako tumambay. Lotte came in first, like 30 minutes before I went in. Nagpakulay pa siya ng buhok na dirty blonde at nagpa-trim ng kilay.

"Aziah," someone sat down in front of me. "Sabi ko na nga ba hindi mo ako matitiis."

"Ikaw na naman?" My jaw clenched upon seeing the familiar face of Kio. He was smiling from ear to ear.

"Have you seen the video? He would get his reputation tarnished. Ang balita ko pa naman ay kapag nagka-record sa OSA ay awtomatikong hindi na p'wede makapasok sa latin honors," he smiled sweetly at me.

"Cut the crap," I snickered at him. "Anong gusto mong mangyari?"

"Break up with him," seryosong saad n'ya. "Date me instead."

Nangunot ang noo ko sa kan'ya. "Tanga ka ba? Bakit ko naman gagawin ko iyon?"

May commitment issues na nga ako, gagawin pa akong tanga sa pagpili! P'wede bang isa-isa lang sa mga bagay na ilalagay ko sa toxic traits ko? Bumi-bingo na ako eh.

"Then this video would be available inside the office of student's affair," he shrugged off. "At ikaw ang sisisihin ni Ryker dahil lahat ng paghihirap n'ya sa buong kolehiyo ay mawawala dahil sa 'yo. You think he loves you enough for him to give up those merits? Hindi. Laruan ka lang n'ya, Aziah. You're probably his favorite toy right now, but what makes you think he would stay?"

Hindi ko magawang sumagot doon. Nanatiling tikom ang bibig ko dahil naiintindihan ko ang punto n'ya. Ryker has the whole world in front of him. Ako? I was a mere dust on his universe.

"Gaya ng tatay mo, iiwan ka lang din n'ya," pangungumbinsi ni Kio.

"What the hell!?" I shrieked at him.

"I know everything about you, Ziah! I know your house, your course, mga kamag-anak mo, mama mo, papa mo. . .I know you enough and I promise you that I will stay with you forever. . ." he creepily uttered those words.

The hair on skin prickled as soon as it registered to me; he's a stalker and a possible menace to my life. Sinong gago ang aalamin ang background ng isang tao na hindi naman n'ya close? At nang walang dahilan?

"Ewan ko sa 'yo," I hissed at him. Tumayo na ako at walang sabing dinabog ang upuan sa harap n'ya.

He sighed. "Hindi ito ang huling beses na magkikita tayo, Ziah. You'll see. . .seryoso ako sa 'yo."

My god! He should seriously stuff his mouth with his own fist! Sobrang weird na talaga ng mga pinagsasabi n'ya.

Nanginginig ako habang papalabas. Sumunod sa akin si Lotte. She was frowning while following me.

"I-report mo na kaya? That guy is the Merriam Webster description of creepy," she shuddered as soon as she remembered how Kio looked at me. "Alam kong maganda ka pero grabe ang isang iyon? Hanggang ngayon ay nakatingin pa rin sa 'yo."

I gritted my teeth. Sasabihin ko ba sa kan'ya ang panakot ni Kio? Would I risk Ryker's potential because I don't want to lose him? Hindi ko alam. . .gulong-gulo na talaga ako.

Pagdating sa bahay ay patay ang mga ilaw. Binuksan ko ito at nakita ang isang surpresa. . .para sa akin.

Ryzi was wearing a jersey with Ryker's number on it. Tuwang-tuwa ito nang makita ako. There was a banner near the stairs with the words: "I just wanna ask Ziah if I could court her?"

There were a lot of flowers. A ton of them. Parang naging garden ang buong bahay namin. Lumingon ako upang tanungin kay Mama kung anong mayroon pero iba ang sumalubong sa akin.

Ryker appeared behind me with a soft smile on his face. "Ziah, can I please court you? Can you be my princess?"

My heart was beating rapidly, with a strained voice. I shouted at him. "Putangina, ayoko!"