~"Well, it ain't no use to sit and wonder why, babe, even you don't know by now.
And it ain't no use to sit and wonder why, babe. It'll never do somehow~

Brian didn't see her until New Year's Eve.

He was actually invited to a totally different party, but when Celeste asked him if he had time, all his other plans were forgotten in a blink of an eye in favour of being with her. 

Was it naive of him to think that this maybe finally was his chance to be with her? It seemed awfully cliche, but he didn't care. All he wanted was -if he was honest with himself he wasn't sure what he wanted anymore, when it came to Celeste.  At first she had only seemed attractive, then he had got to know her and started to like her on a personal level and now? After they had made out and she had nearly slept with him, there hadn't been a moment Brian didn't think about the kisses they had exchanged. That she had slept in his bed and her smell had filled his nose for nearly 3 days after it hadn't help either. He wanted her so much it hurt, but some other part of him was scared that if they ever made that step there was no turning back and he would lose her in the end, which he couldn't risk...

He was nervous and had at least changed his outfit five times. Nothing seemed to look right nor to be the right choice. Celeste had said casual, which wasn't exactly a word one would use to describe Brian's wardrobe, but appearing on her doorstep in his usual attire felt wrong somehow... In the end he had settled on a black turtleneck pullover and a pair of trousers with a checked pattern, he hadn't worn for nearly three years. In a way it made him almost feel send back to the early 60's and strangely he didn't mind. It had something comforting about it. Maybe because it reminded him of a time he had been happier than he currently was... Maybe that was as well the reason why it seemed to be the perfect outfit to wear to visit Celeste, she might not remind him of happier times, but she made him feel better, even if he currently felt awfully nervous because of her. 

He nearly didn't dare to ring her bell. Brian stood before her door, unsure what to do. Rain was pouring down on him, the wind was cold, making him shiver, but he couldn't bring himself to ring. Celeste deserved better than him, no matter how much he might want her, he wasn't the right man for her. Frustrated he clenched his teeth and balled his hands into fists. 

"Brian?"

He recognised the voice immediately, but even as Brian turned around and looked at the other man, it made little sense to him. He hadn't seen him in ages and now meeting him here of all places felt unrealistic, even though in the back of his head he could suspect his reason for being here. It was most likely the same as his own: Celeste.

"You're visiting Celeste,"he stated. His tone somewhere in between question and accusation.If the american musician was surprised, he didn't show it, instead he stepped closer to Brian, so close that he was now standing  underneath the umbrella as well, which he certainly didn't mind. Brian was at this point properly drenched, though he should have known better and brought an umbrella with him as well. Celeste was going to nag at him for not doing so or maybe not... After all she had Bob, so why should she bother with him? The worst was Brian liked him and he certainly couldn't be mad at the folk musician for his past with Celeste, but he still was. It was his stupid jealousy that filled his head and he could do nothing against it, beside glare at Dylan, who just smiled knowingly.

"I missed that chance ages ago, man. We're only friends."

Brian's glare turned into a confused frown. Of course he knew they had been friends, he had seen the pictures, but he couldn't believe that Bob hadn't made a move on Celeste.  "You weren't with her?" he asked disbelievingly.

"We were and we weren't, you know? Our timing was always off and it still is," Bob told him cryptically, making Brian only more suspicious of his intentions.

"What are you doing here then?"

"I could ask you the same thing. She wouldn't go out with you." Brian wasn't sure what irked him more Bob's casual tone or that he voiced what Brian knew already deep down.

"She would!" He yelled out, louder than he meant to, at which Bob only smiled and Brian realised too late, what he had indirectly admitted to the other man: He was interested in Celeste and Brian would have liked nothing more than to hit himself for his own stupidity. "But we decided it is better to stay friends," Brian added and he could swear the folk musician only smiled more, obviously not believing that 'they' had decided that. 

"I give you an advice, Celeste loves lilies."

"But-"

"Here, I can always visit here tomorrow,"Bob interrupted him and held out a bouquet of white lilies Brian hadn't even realised the other musician had been carrying, though he was confused he still took them. "I couldn't have stayed long anyway. I need to be at a party. Tell her Zimmerman says it ain't no use to sit and wonder why. It'll never do somehow."

He had heard the words before, Brian was sure of it, but couldn't place them nor could he ask Bob. Brian was speechless, this whole interaction seemed so surreal and if he didn't know that he was absolutely sober he would have believed he only imagined it. Dylan used Brian's state to his advantage and stepped away from the blond guitarist and rain fell down on Brian again, which finally got him out of his daze. 

"Why are you helping me?" he yelled out after Dylan, who didn't bother to turn around and just walked on, but Brian could swear he heard him mumble  'I'm not helping you, but Celeste.'

" Wait" Brian tried again , but Bob disappeared in a nearby car and all Brian could do was stand in the rain and wonder if that really had happened.

He would have doubted it, but then where had the flowers come from?

*

Brian couldn't do it. He couldn't give her Bob's cryptic message, after some time he had at least figured out where he had heard the words before. It were lyrics from one of Bob's songs, don't think twice it's alright, but that was everything Brian had. He wondered what Dylan had meant by mentioning them to him, was he perhaps telling him to go for Celeste or had he just been fooling with him? Knowing Dylan, everything was possible, but at least he had been right about the flowers.

Celeste had looked so happy and fuzzed about how pretty they are for 5 minutes and all Brian could do was stare at her and wonder what was so great about flowers, but he surely didn't complain when after she had put them away, had hugged him and kissed his cheek to thank him. 

It had been too short though, Brian wanted- no needed more of her. Sadly whenever he tried to make a move on her, she came up with a silly excuse and send him off.  For once the two off them were alone without anyone possibly interrupting them and Celeste tried her hardest to keep him at arm's length. Brian suspected or at least hoped the reason for her caution was that she wanted him as much as he wanted her and was simply scared about what it would mean if she gave in to her desire. 

Bob's words came to his mind again as he was eating a slice of the cake Celeste had made for dessert. Her food had been amazing as always and he had been more than full when she had offered him some cake, but he couldn't resist. Maybe yes Dylan was right, and he shouldn't think twice about Celeste as well and just be with her. 

"Are you finished? Can I take your plate?" she asked him, tearing him out of his thoughts. Bob's words were easier said than done though... He only nodded shyly as she took the plate before heading to the sink with it to clean it. 

How was he supposed to approach her though without having her yell at him in the end? he wondered as he watched her doing the dishes. She was telling him about something Marion had said or done, but he wasn't listening to a word she said. He didn't care about her sister at all, even if he had to thank her for introducing them. Instead his mind wandered back to 'how to win Celeste'. There didn't seem to be just one solution to his problem or only ones that would end in her throwing him out he feared... But maybe he needed to risk it.

" It ain't no use to sit and wonder why. It'll never do somehow..." he mumbled quietly.

Celeste stopped in the middle of her washing and looked slightly tense all of sudden. She was clutching a pan in her hands, not moving at all and an awkward silence settled between the two. Frowning Brian got up from his chair, slightly fearing Dylan had indeed planned on ruining his evening, when he approached Celeste. Cautiously he patted her back and she let the pan sink into the soapy water. Before he could do or say anything else she hugged him and buried her head in his shoulder. He returned the too tight hug, sensing that it was what she needed.

"Are you fine?" he asked her truly concerned.

"I know this will never work out, but I can't help myself fr-from wanting you so much." Her voice was hushed by his shoulder, and it nearly sounded like she was sobbing as well, but Brian still heard every word of what she had said and his heart leaped. 

"Don't think twice, it's alright," he found himself say as he caressed her hair. 

He felt her smile at his words and she turned her head sideways. It was still resting on his shoulder, but no longer hidden, even if he couldn't see it from his position. "I used to say that all the time to Bob, when he was worried about something... It seemed so much easier back then maybe I was just naive ..."

"No. Sometimes we have to take a risk or we'll wonder about it all our life..."

Celeste didn't react at first and Brian already feared he had messed up again, when she lifted her head from his shoulder and looked at him. Her eyes were slightly red, but her expression seemed determined. "You're right..." she said as she leaned in. In the distance he thought he could hear fireworks going off, but he had no idea if it was due to the New Year or Celeste's kiss. Of one thing he was sure though 1969 was going to be his year.

Thank you for reading, voting and comments.<3333

* Lyrics by Bob Dylan

I think there are about 3 chapters left to this story.