15
It had already been four hours at twenty-five thousand feet. Or maybe many more, I couldn't really tell. At least the screen on the back of the seat before us informed us about the point of space we were at. Anyhow, I would have said we were lost in a tangle of time.
Luke was deep asleep beside me, and Professor Abbey had been sat at the other end of the plane.
I thought of Nora. It seemed like I hadn't thought of her in a long time. And that made me feel very guilty. I could see her flying around the plane in that white hippie dress she had always wanted to wear. I could see her face popping up at every window, her finger pointing at me and reminding me how unfaithful I had been to her over the last weeks.
I knew she was the reason I had gotten this far in my research. She had been the cause of whatever was going to happen next. I owed her a lot. I owed her her life back. I felt she was angry at me for not having been able to figure the secret of life out before. I felt sick when I thought I had needed her death to get deep into the matter. I may have died someday as well if she hadn't been killed by leukemia.
I hated picturing her as an angry, frustrated soul. She had always been just the opposite when she was alive. She would have encouraged me to get as far as I'd gotten, even if she couldn't make it with me. I was certain she wouldn't be angry if she could actually be in a mood. But paranoia conquered my imagination every time I thought of her, and transformed her into a furious, vengeance-thirsty enemy.
I missed her. I would have loved her to meet Luke. I laughed picturing the expression that would show on her face seeing me in love like yet another fool. I supposed she would feel a bit disappointed in me. She always said she admired my lack of need for someone to make me high. Nora believed in passionate love only theoretically. She used to say the only true love was the one each person had for their own life.
She used to say that, and she died at twenty-one. That obvious, ironic and smudged thought turned my laughter into tears, as the frightening image of her that my subconscious had made up faded away and let me see her open, contagious smile. I promised myself I would never forget that smile. I promised her I wouldn't let her fade away. She must stay alive, with me, in me.
The pilot muttered something through the megaphone and Luke opened his eyes slightly.
"Are we there?"
"Almost." I said, and I pointed at the screen. We were a dot that was almost touching the continent.
"Ouch, I think I killed my neck sleeping in this position. I think it needs your witchy life-injecting poison right here, miss."
"Are you sure that is the poison it needs?"
He laughed and sat up to kiss me, still complaining about his neck. A smartly dressed blonde distracted me from him.
"Luke! That's Kate Rosewood."
She was covering herself in perfume and stretching out her flared business trousers and white blouse.
"What time did you make the appointment, exactly?"
"Tonight. At seven."
"In six hours." I said, as I settled my clock five hours before, flying into the past.
I sighed.
"Do you think they suspect anything?"
"I had no choice but make them suspect so that they would make an appointment with me the day before the congress. So, I guess they do."
We had decided on Fleming&Florey after realizing it was yet another pharmaceutical brand. Luke had tried to revise their ethical policies but hadn't had much luck at getting any insights. The ones we had read on their web page didn't sound bad. I would have been strongly preoccupied about their marketing issues if they had, though.
At least we had Luke on the inside. That was the strongest reason to justify our choice. I realized I must appear strong and sure of myself to be able to negotiate properly. But I wasn't important and I didn't have important people supporting me, so I didn't have much to do. Anyway, I bathed myself in perfume, mirroring Kate Rosewood's movement, and lifted my chin up. Luke laughed and I sprayed perfume at him.
"Dear passengers, we'll be landing at JFK, New York, in thirty minutes." the pilot muttered.
"Ready for the jungle?" Luke said, teasing me.
"Give me a break." I complained, and I sprayed some more perfume at him.
Kate took her hand luggage and passed before us, without having any idea that we were the berserk students she had a date with that evening. Or maybe she wasn't the one meeting us.
"Do you know anything about this meeting, Luke?"
"I know it's our final judgment. Specially yours."
"Please, Luke. I need a tone of valerian, not your ... encouraging words."
"No, I know what you need, and it's not valerian. Let's get out of the airport and I'll tell you."
Professor Abbey met us at the baggage claim, and the three of us took a taxi, becoming one more tiny, yellow ant in the cage controlled from the top of the skyscrapers. We entered Manhattan from the first avenue, and passed perpendicular to it, along the 56th street, into the following ones, as luxury increased together with the number of each of them. Nevertheless, from the taxi, nothing seemed as big and impressive as I had imagined it. The buildings were not as flawless, as silvery, as futuristic, as they appeared on magazines.
We arrived at the equator, and a series of the shops Kate Rosewood's shop assistant must buy her clothes at passed before me. However, I missed the elegance the expensive shop area had back in London.
Elegance was touristed in the fifth avenue, naff. As every other thing, it had been made big, and had, therefore, lost its charm.
The sixth and the seventh avenues were two steps back in sophistication. I quickly realized the isle was like a mountain in which the fifth avenue was the peak. Everyone wanted to get there, to be there. We arrived at the hotel and made our way to our rooms. Separate rooms. Professor Abbey didn't know one of them was going to be empty the three nights.
A shiver run down my spine as I wondered if the three of them would be empty after tonight. Or maybe two of them, since Professor Abbey might seriously kill us when he found out what we had been keeping from him. I had already been picturing how treason and scorn would look on his face, how he would frown and shut us off.
He told us he was meeting up with a colleague for lunch, and set us free as he excused himself. Luke suggested we went to Central Park. I inquired him about what he had not told me at the plane, but he managed to escape my questions every time. He didn't have to work very hard to do that, because my insisting mind stopped every time he brushed his lips with mine. We arrived at Central Park and he took my hand and started running.
"Luke!" I said, laughing. "Where are we going?"
He kissed my forehead and kept jogging until we reached The Lake. He threw himself on the grass between two Red Oaks and took a packet from his pocket, as I watched, expectantly.
"Welcome to the United States and their impassable, iron frontiers."
I unwrapped it and glanced back at him, shocked:
"Are you crazy?!"
He cracked up laughing.
"Africa told me to give it to you when you started to freak out. So here you go."
He infected me with laughter, as if we were already high, but, after, a few seconds, sanity conquered my erratic mind again.
"I knew she was nuts, but I didn't know you were too, as flipped out as to cross the borders with marihuana in your pocket! Do you realize how much trouble we could be in, in this intolerant country? And how the hell did they not realize?"
"I have no idea. But seeing your shocked face was definitely worth the risk." he said, and he burst out laughing again.
"Well, I am definitely not going to smoke it before meeting the always-serene Kate Rosewood."
"Okay, I'll smoke it all by myself, then."
I looked at him warily and he broke out in laughter again.
"How about we save it for tonight?" I suggested.
"I like that idea. We should invite Professor Abbey to joint us." he said, and laughed some more.
I laughed along, and said:
"I am starting to think you had one of these by yourself on the plane."
When we had already laughed everything we could and kissed as hard as we could without doing anything else, I rested my head on his shoulder and we observed the lake.
It was an intense moment. Whitish, winter sunshine shone on the water, and swans cuddled together, looking for warmth. The leafs that hadn't fallen down were a vibrant shade of green, and that contrasted with the off-colour appearance the beautiful but weak winter light gave everything else. But the most striking contrast was the one between the peace of that moment and the chaos in my head. I started to feel very cold, and cuddled between Luke's legs.
The light didn't last very long, and though the sunset invited us to explore each other beneath the oaks, we had to contain ourselves when we looked at our crazed, jet-lagged watches and realized it was time to face the first event in the destiny of humanity.
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