Season 2, Episode 6: Into You Like a Train
Overall Episode Number: 15
Created by: Shonda Rhimes

/ / /

In general... people can be categorized in one of two ways. Those who love surprises, and those who don't. I don't. I've never met a surgeon that enjoys a surprise, because, as surgeons we like to be in the know. We have to be in the know. Because when we aren't, people die and lawsuits happen. Am I rambling? I think I'm rambling. Okay, so my point actually ... and I do have one. Has nothing to do with surprises or death or lawsuits or even surgeons. My point is this: whoever said what you don't know can't hurt you was a complete and total moron. Because for most people I know, not knowing is the worst feeling in the world. Okay, fine, maybe it's the second worst.

- Meredith Grey

/ / /

Mackenzie looked at the busy E.R. with wide eyes. There were incoming patients left and right, and Mackenzie was sure that she might have to stay overnight at the hospital.

The 11-year-old girl spotted Derek, and she began to follow him. "Papa! What's going on?!"

Derek whipped around, seeing his daughter. "Sweetie, you shouldn't be here in the E.R. You don't need to see all of this."

"Papa, I just talked George through a thoracotomy in a broken-down elevator; I think I can handle whatever's going on," Mackenzie said.

Derek, having known about her role in what went down earlier, nodded. "Okay. There was a train wreck, and the E.R. is getting swamped with patients. I want you to be as far from the E.R. as possible. Okay, baby girl? Can you do that for me?"

Mackenzie nodded. "Of course I can, Papa. Just page me if you need me. Go save some lives."

Derek kissed her head. "I love you, and I will see you when I can."

Mackenzie sighed as she watched him walk off, her lips forming a thin line. "I love you too."

/ / /

In the X-ray observation room, George and Bailey were standing and looking at the scans. Burke was sitting on a chair, looking at them on a computer screen. Meredith was just standing off to the side with her banana bag IV. They were viewing the x-rays of Tom and Bonnie.

George sighed. "Is-is it going straight through her spine?"

Bailey nodded. "It is. T8's completely crushed."

Derek walked in. "Hey." He notices Meredith with her bag. "What happened?"

"Uh, tequila." Meredith answered.

He nodded.

"I'm keeping an eye on her," Bailey said.

He nodded again and then noticed the x-rays. "Look at this. These people are still alive?"

George nodded. "They're still making small talk."

"Pole's tamponading the wound as far as we can see," Bailey informed.

Derek looked at the x-ray. "It's hitting the aorta."

Burke nodded. "And look at him. It's right in line with his inferior vena cava."

"Is there anyway to operate without separating them?" George asked.

Burke shook his head.

Derek also shook his head. "No."

George sighed. "But if we move the pole...."

"They'll both bleed out," Bailey finished.

Burke sighed. "What if we don't move the pole? What if we move one of the patients off the pole to get the saw in there? Then we can hold the pole steady in the other one. Move it very slowly and repair the damage as we go."

George sighed heavily. "Who? Which would you move?"

Derek glanced at Meredith who stared back at him.

Burke sighed. "With her aortic injuries, her chances of survival are extremely slim no matter what we do. But if we move her, we have a real shot of saving him."

"Well I could argue since her injuries are so extensive we should move him. Give her the best shot we can," Derek argued.

"So basically whoever you move doesn't stand a chance?" Meredith asked. They all glanced at her, unsettled. "So how do you choose? How do you decide who gets to live?"

/ / /

George and Meredith look through a window to an adjacent hallway that can look into the ER ward. George and Meredith were sitting below the window.

"Ow." Meredith whined.

George was giving an IV to take a sample of Meredith's blood. "Ow. Shh." Meredith shushed.

George shrugged. "Sorry."

Meredith chuckled. "So you operated on a heart earlier, George. You think you could draw a little blood."

George smirked. "I rocked that heart."

"Yeah you did," Meredith agreed.

George sighed. "I think I'm strung out on the scalpel."

Meredith smiled. "Nothing wrong with that."

George changed the subject. "So any news? About..."

"No. I can't read him," Meredith said sadly.

George sighed. "You know, I think, I think it's pretty amazing you even gave him the choice. And I think for what it's worth I think he's crazy if he doesn't pick you."

Cristina came up hurriedly to them. "Please tell me you've seen a right leg. A cleanly severed right leg?"

George shook his head. "No."

Cristina hurried off.

Meredith chuckled. "How weird is this job?"

George nodded. "Weird."

/ / /

Alex and Meredith were standing at on open doorway, facing each other resting against the edges outside the blood labs.

Meredith looked at Alex. "Addison yelled at you in front of a patient?"

Alex shrugged. "She didn't exactly yell." Meredith just looked at him expectantly. He sighed, "Fine. She's Satan's whore."

Meredith nodded. "Thank you. So did you yell back?"

"No," Alex answered.

"Dude, you lost your mojo," Meredith claimed.

Alex raised an eyebrow. "Excuse you?"

Meredith shrugged. "I was trying to talk boy."

"O'Malley plugs a hole with his finger and everyone walks around like he's some kind of hero. I have one off day." Alex said frustrated.

Meredith smirked. "You chickened out."

Alex chuckled. "I hesitated briefly."

"Why didn't you kiss Izzie?"

Alex stopped smiling. "And now I'm leaving."

/ / /

Bailey, George and Derek were in the room with Bonnie and Tom, who were looking apprehensive.

Derek sighed. "This is hard, because your body is in a certain amount of shock. It's preventing you from feeling pain." Burke walked in, and Derek continued. "Feeling the extent of your injuries."

"Dr. Shepherd. We have a metal pole cutting a path through our insides. I don't know about Tom here, but I didn't expect to walk out of here anytime soon." Bonnie said softly. George looked upset. "So ... whatever it is you have to say just please ... say it."

"Okay Bonnie." Derek said and nodded slightly. "In order to operate on Mr. Maynard, we have to separate you two. In order to do that, we have to move you backwards off the pole."

Tom looked confused. "Can't you just pull the pole out of both of us?"

Derek shook his head no slightly at Bonnie.

Burke sighed. "Well if we did that, you would both start bleeding very quickly. Too quickly. Right now the pole is plugging the wounds. Once removed, the organs will shift and there's a great deal of damage."

Bonnie tried not to cry. "So if you move me, I'll die?"

There's a little bit of silence.

Derek continued. "We're gonna do everything we can to..."

Bonnie started crying softly.

Tom interrupted. "No. No. If anyone body has to go it should be me. You just move..."

Burke interrupted. "No. Mr. Maynard ... Mr. Maynard your injuries are less extensive." Derek took Bonnie's hand and rubbed it soothingly. "If we pull the pole from you as we operate around it, we have a better chance at repairing the damage."

Tom looked pained. "It's not right. It's not fair."

Bonnie smiled sadly. "Shh, Tom. It's not fair either way. .... Is ah, is my Danny ... is he here yet?"

George shook his head. "There are delays at the airport, ah the storm."

Bailey sighed. "Uh, we could wait but, ah, the longer we do the higher the risk of infection for the..."

Bonnie sadly interrupted. "No, no. This is better. Huh. Danny, he wouldn't understand. I've had a couple of hours to, you know," she takes a deep breath, "process all of this. But if, if he had to see me ... talk to me like this ... well, I just think it would be too hard."

/ / /

Mackenzie got Derek's page and she walked from the on-call room she was hanging out in all the way to the O.R. board.

"Papa?"

Derek turned to his daughter, his blue eyes full of tears. He tried to force out a smile, but he couldn't. "Come here, sweetheart."

Mackenzie walked to him, filling his arms. Derek presses several kisses to her head, silent tears streaming down his cheeks as he did so.

Mackenzie grew concerned when she felt Derek's body shake with choked back sobs. "Are you okay, Papa?"

Derek didn't attempt to wipe his eyes. He inhaled shakily and held his daughter closer. "No. No, honey, I'm not okay. I have these two patients who have a metal pole sticking through their bodies. The girl — Bonnie — she has a high probability of dying. I'm going to have to be the one to tell her parents and fiancé that Bonnie didn't... that she..."

Mackenzie hugged him tighter. "I'm sorry, Papa. I'm so sorry that you have to do this. I love you, Papa. I love you so much."

Derek sniffled as he held his daughter. "I love you too, baby girl. Papa loves you so very much."

/ / /

Burke left the scrub room as Meredith starts prepping herself. Bailey left as Derek entered the room. George looked at this and looked at Meredith.

"George!" Meredith whispered to him.

George nodded. "Right." He left the room and headed into the O.R.

Meredith looked at Derek. "Hey."

Derek nodded. "Hi."

There's a little silence.

Derek cleared his throat. "You know, uh, I went to the bar."

"I heard." Meredith replied.

He half nodded wryly. Meredith stood, waiting for his decision, but he doesn't say anything.

Derek sighed. "You take some aspirin with the banana bag? Helps with the hangover."

Meredith nodded slightly. Derek continued getting ready, and not really making eye contact with Meredith. Realization dawned on Meredith.

"Oh. You're staying with her."

Derek nodded. "Yeah, she's my wife. Meredith... Mackenzie needs Addison. I have to try and make it work for my daughter's sake. My baby deserves to have her family, no matter what."

/ / /

Mackenzie could see the downcast look on Derek's face when they passed by Meredith on the way to the parking lot. Derek was taking Mackenzie to the trailer so she could get some quality sleep in her own bed.

Mackenzie didn't say anything when they got in the truck, and said nothing on the trip to the trailer. When Derek put her to bed, she finally said something.

"You chose Addison over Meredith."

Derek sighed softly as he kissed her head. "I did. But we will talk more about it another day. Right now... you need to sleep. You've been up for almost 24 hours, and that's not healthy. I will have O'Malley come by with some food for you when he gets a break. Just try and get some rest for me, okay, baby girl?"

Mackenzie nodded tiredly. "Okay. I love you, Papa," she said before she closed her eyes out of exhaustion.

Derek pulled her blanket over her body, kissing her cheek. "Papa loves you more."

/ / /

As surgeons, there are so many things we have to know. We have to know we have what it takes. We have to know how to take care of our patients. And how to take care of each other. Eventually we even have to figure out... how to take care of ourselves. As surgeons we have to be in the know. But as human beings, sometimes it's better to stay in the dark. Because in the dark, there maybe fear... but there's also hope.

- Meredith Grey

/ / /

2016 words

Next Update: Something to Talk About

*I'm sorry for the lack of Mackenzie content. Did anyone like the scene between a crying Derek and Mackenzie?*

Published: 2/08/2021