John slept soundly after the sessions and there was not much hanky panky, well ok there was a little bit of hanky panky but he fell straight to sleep on my belly afterwards.

I was up again very early and made a huge breakfast knowing that they would be off on tour yet again, all the way up to Scotland then tumbling back into England Leeds, Brighton, Bournemouth, over to Belfast the start of November then back through Nottingham, Southampton, Cardiff in Wales, then ever closer Liverpool, Sheffield, Bristol!

They would have days off here and there but I wouldn't get to see them 'til around midnight on the 10th of November!

"Morning luv" Paul wandered in first, looking wonderful in his suit but it was sad too as they were so close to going, "John's in the lav".

I fetched tea and loaded up a plate each, sitting in the spot between John and Paul... my spot.

"Oi don't eat it all" John yelled bounding down the staircase, I looked up smiling like it was the most sunniest of days but I must have been failing cause John gave me a peck on the cheek and a squeeze on the hand under the table, settling his fingers on my skin as he shifted the skirt a little higher.

He tried eating everything one handed and Paul was watching intently, amused at Johns folly. John picked up and dropped loads of food on the plate, not taking a single bite.

"Abbs, help"

I pulled the knife through the grilled tomatoe and he stabbed with his fork while I pushed it on with the knife then I helped load a few baked beans on top, I was giggling as he squeezed my knee.

He gave up after a while because he realised my own fry-up was going cold and I lost my leg's warm fingers, they escaped back to his knife and meal.

Assured I would be safe alone John whispered love letters in my ear, everything I wanted to hear, that he would be true, that he would call very often and that I shouldn't worry about him. Paul basically did the same again asking me to be safe, telling me to have fun, use the car- the Aston Martin too whenever I wanted, he didn't say he would be true but that bit wasn't mine to hear.

I waved goodbye as the gate girls screamed. I shut the door on the outpouring of the girl's overwrought grief, having enough of my own without their howls of despair.

I was going to Jim's firstly, then into Saville Road to help Freda til the tour was over. Jane was away so that left Pattie and Maureen who would be dropping by every other weekend and we were full of plans to go to the cinema, shopping, perhaps a trip to the zoo, Hyde park and even a trip on the Thames.

The house was incredibly silent as I tiredly climbed the stairs. The washing up could wait, the laundry could sit unwashed in the pile and I would sob in my loneliness for just a little while.