You Can't Do That in the road

Missi Mini stayed home that day, safe in her nice warm garage. Paul's chauffeured black shiny Rolls Royce looking motor pulled to the kerb out front of Jim's instead.

Paul pushed my mouth closed and opened the door to the back seat. I stepped back to Jim, who was hovering to say goodbye and also on the lookout for apparently pesky Beatle fans. I gave him a hug goodbye.

"Should be at St Johns Wood in 45 minutes, Paul" the chauffeur offered up.

"Oi, Mal mate this is Abby" Paul had sat forward on the seat and Mal nodded to me in the rear mirror. "Mals our all round roustabout"

"Pleasure.... Knife sales have been up so I brought the Rolls for his royal highness" Mal nodded toward Paul chuckling and I frowned, another person who knew I was a fool, how wonderful. 

Paul smiled tiredly and fell back beside me in the seat, grabbing his bottom lip with his teeth lightly he then waved manically at Mal, hit a button, and the privacy window slid silently up.

"That's better"

"No, it's not really" I looked around for a button on my side of the vehicle, I couldn't see one.

"Look Abb I'm getting rather irritated at all this, ummm, tension"

"I'm getting rather irritated by you so fairs, fair I guess" I retorted quickly smiling at Paul as I did so.

"How are we going to do this, you know for dad's sake and your sexual pleasure" Paul snorted at his very unfunny joke. I did what a good strong northern girl would do gave it back to him.

"Well anything for your dad but I don't think you have a snowballs chance of fulfilling my sexual pleasures" I giggled and Paul soft punched my shoulder, grimacing at his takedown.

"You're ok, you know" Paul flashed a megawatt grin at me, and brought me in for a hug. Paul McCartney is hugging me!

"Truly what am I going to do, how do I make you un-Beatle celebrity crush and brother- sister material" I mused as I stared at the streets streaking by quickly.

"We could just do it" Paul held a hand out "See if it fits and all that"

"You're a really bad tease" I tease back yet again, silently shaking in my boots as I do, but I will retort back nonetheless "Now?"

I smiled as alluringly as I could, starting to remove my cardigan off one shoulder and Paul's face dropped, fear setting in, if he could have, he would have been scurrying out the door onto the roadway the car swept over "Well I see I turn you on, NOT!"

"Abigail!" Paul was reddening at the thought and consequences, I had to laugh at his pain. I was held in a head lock for the rest of the journey, my hair being tousled and fluffed about.

We were so engrossed in grossing each other with nasty asides we hadn't noticed the car stop and park, the door was cranked open at a disturbing sped and John jumped just as quickly in, uninvited.

"Well isn't this pleasant, I see Paul is already annoying the crap out of you, Abbs. Like he does me" John heckled and tore Pauls arm from my shoulder, pushed Paul all the way to the other side of the car too. I was now in a tender embrace with John's arms slung around me lovingly, a quick kiss on the cheek was dispensed.

I tensed as his lips hit my cheek and sat rigid.

"I wouldn't do that John" Paul watched the scene and smirked dangerously at me "Our Abbs is in a quagmire of fan girl unrequited sexual tension" John slowly lowered his gaze to mine and smiled hungrily but in a John joking way, his eyes levelling me with their intensity. I didn't feel like joking or recoiling in embarassment, so I put a hand on his thigh and Paul cracked.

"Abigail Grant McCartney, whatever your name is, retract and desist or by god, I will go mad" Paul shouted and shoved my hand off Johns thigh, John laughing like a mad man then stopping just as soon as he started. Very strange but very funny.

I was then quarantined to the centre position of the backseat a hand space either side, while John and Paul talked about me.

"So, should you just do 'er. So, she can be severely disgusted and under- impressed" John heckled over my head at Paul and laughed.

"Well better than you doing 'er and she is disgusted with the whole male species" Paul retorted quickly.

"Threesome!?" John threw out the words like confetti, slowly the word seeped into my ears....then brain. As I reddened like a beetroot, they both took delight in my uncomfortable demure.

I'm a virgin, I'm lacking in any and all experience, John and Paul's casual attitude had me frazzled to say the least and I was on a tight rope of tension.

I took the time while they bantered to mull over the logistics of the whole 'threesome' act, my face must have run a mile a minute with weird grimacing and wondering- both good and not so good, then I spilled out "ewww"

"Stop it, this minute" I growled as madly as I could, throwing my hands up in panic.

"There she is, thought you had hoped out at the last set of shops" John tickled me "Come on Abbs, we're only teasing"

"Are we nearly to wherever we are going" I begged out the question.

I needed freedom, any freedom, from the confines of the car. A soundproof room so I could scream blue murder sounds rather nice at the moment. "This isn't going to work" I said sadly.

'I'm sorry's' flooded my ears and they were back to being nice pleasant young men again. I could now handle a few more minutes in their company.

Abbey Road studios the sign said, as I watched out the window beside John, we had arrived it seemed. They now looked bored with the car ride or perhaps it was the return to 'work' making them quiet.

It was neither I was quick to find out.

At least 50 plus girls jumping up and down, pounding on the windows and metal of the Rolls were adoringly, loudly, greeting their hero's, I shrunk back in the seat and Paul tapped my hand, waking me from the scare.

"Keep your head down, and hold my hand" I twisted my mouth and looked at his hand like it was a dirty rag "Or John's, whatever, just make sure your holding something of ours" Paul pleaded, John sniggered. John was then rewarded by Paul who clobbered him in the head playfully, I laughed at their antics which made Paul smile. So out of Johns pain came sweet relief of the heavy tension we had previously shared.

The door flew open and Mal stood guarding the boys as much as he could. John got out, grabbed me roughly by the hand and fled forward, Paul was quick to tail us from behind, we were smashed together tightly and both my hands were in Beatles paws now. The studio door beckoned and I could see Ringo staring at the melee from the seemingly safe building. Then the words fell over me.

"Who's the girl belong to, Paul?" A voice cried but this voice was loud, screaming the question "Not your usual pretty type I say" My hand was squeezed in reassurance.

"Yea, could get better from our group of girls, guys.... don't have to look in the bottom of barrels for 'em" Another ridiculed me and I was shrinking quickly, another few steps and we virtually fell into the building, Ringo Starr helped me to stand as Mal grabbed John up, Paul rescuing himself from the tea ladies cart.

"You ok, Abbs?" John looked me over and I nodded not lifting my head though, the scornful words had tapped a huge gaping vile hole in me.

Paul lifting my chin, him smiling at me so understandingly undid my tangle of pain and I gulped greedily for air to stop tears, I wasn't going to cry, they were just words that were given to a strange girl, holding their idols hands.

I nodded more steady now and looked at Ringo, smiling a little "Hi" I whispered out and Ringo smiled broadly.

"She's alright. Didn't you give Abigail the dolly drill Paul??" Ringo tisk- tisked Paul and grabbed me from the boys, we started off down the hallway towards I don't know where, I was safe now so I didn't mind.

"Don't pay heed to those scruffs outside, they have no life bar mouching around here all day waiting for us to appear, they can be nasty, like you have now found out but once they see your no 'arm, all will stop I'll bet" Ringo, dressed in cream turtleneck sweater and dark coffee coloured pants gave my shoulder a squeeze ok, as we moved further inside the building.

"Bathroom, Richard?" I begged out.

"Oh sure luv, over there." Ringo tossed a finger in the direction shaking his rings in my face as he did so "Through them doors then it's on the left, no right, left is for us lot of males!" He chortled.

Finally, alone, I could gather up my thoughts and stop my utterly irrational mind, gathering speed to madness.

Fixing my makeup had me concentrate on the image of the child in the mirror, holding one hand over the other to keep a steady hand to reapply my lipstick and dust over my features with a light foundation, a brush through my hair and a spray of perfume. I was composed, ready again for my adventure. I tumbled out the bathroom door and was greeted with three boys leaning, nonchalantly smoking, on the wall opposite. The sight was overwhelming on one hand and utterly wonderful on the other, I choose wonderful and grinned broadly and was met with a return serve of open, happy smiles.

'Ready! Let's go find George" I grabbed Pauls arm hugging him to me and we meandered down the corridor following John and Ringo, who were walking backwards most of the way, chatting aimlessly about the latest song 'House of the Rising Sun' by the Animals.

"It's stripped down and o' course that's what makes it different" Paul offered to John.

"It's sexy and tough and filled with power" I offered and John laughed at my open admission.

"OK, A hard Day's Night?" Ringo joined in.

"Not fair, um powerful, fast, pushing me over with...."

"Sexual tension" John and Paul cried in unison and we all laughed noisily down the hall, George peeked out at the commotion and offered up his arms for embrace. I accepted, I liked the way he held me close swinging lightly like I was a close friend, not the stranger that just turned up.

"'ello luv" George smiled down at me they were all tall and I was a shorty amongst giants "So Paul thought he would share you then" I nodded and he led me into what was their home away from home, the studio full of instruments and speakers, empty teacups littered the piano, biscuit packs on a table, Ringo's drum kit across the room gleaming silver frosting at me. "Sit yourself there and be prepared for amazingly slow process called John deciding where to sit to play today!"

Paul wandered over with a sliver of a proud smile on his lips to stop in front of me and hesitantly popped down on his haunches "So we will hang here for a bit, and then home to home" He smiled at his gaff "then some tea, alright?"

"Sure, but won't I be in the way of Richards brilliance?" I smirked and Ringo tipped an imaginary hat my way.

"No, no, course not we are just laying out what has been swimming in our heads over the weekend. Any way! if you get bored blame George"

"I 'eard that" George snatched his outstretched arm back which was about to offer Paul biscuits.

And with that I was subjected to 2 hours of intriguing snippets of magnificence and clangs of sound going nowhere; hastily scrawled lyrics no sooner written, were discarded on the floor, others kept on top of the piano or beside me on the table, lines scratched out and changed, tidied into verses of love and fun.

A tinny don do de don don de de on guitar turned into 'You Can't Do That' in minutes seeming to flow out in perfection, although I had an inkling this had been in the works for a few days, either way, John's voice coarse and wanting making it soar in my ears and their harmony's swoon worthy. I had to clap when they finished running through it.

"So, it's ok, yea!?"

"Perfect" I replied smiling.