Episode 32: Cherrisnake
Cherri honestly didn't have anyone to really reunite with. She honestly didn't think her parents wanted to see her and if they did, then she'd apologize. But, that was a time for another day.
Was that a sign that she had more to work on in order to get redeemed? Probably.
But in the meantime, she was much more curious about what Pentious had meant earlier...and now...
Pentious let out a maniacal cackle as he held a paint-covered rifle close to his chest, taking cover behind a wall. "Face it, my dear!!! In thisss battlefield, you are outmatched!"
Cherri cackled, holding her own paintball rifle. "We'll see about that, old man!!!"
Pentious then peeked behind the wall, aiming his rifle as he slowly and quietly slithered out. And when he heard footsteps, he whipped around and began firing.
Multiple colors of paint splattered across the once blank walls. If one was colorblind, they would probably assume its red and they had just witnessed someone's brains being blown out.
But, to Pentious' surprise, Cherri had used a recording of footsteps from her phone, and then the cyclops appeared, blasting at him with pink paint while laughing maniacally. "EAT THIS!!!!!"
Pentious was hit in the back with the various paintballs and he collapsed, dropping his paint rifle. "I YIELD, I YIELD!!!"
Cherri giggled, covered in various paints herself as she went over and held out her hand towards him. "Good game, though!!! That was a lot of fun!"
Pentious laughed as he took her hand. "And thank you...FOR LETTING YOUR GUARD DOWN! SSSURPRISE!"
He then took out a paint pistol and shot her in return, covering her stomach with golden paint.
Cherri's eye widened in surprise, then she grinned. "Ooohhh, you're so gonna get it!!!! C'mere!!!!"
Pentious laughed and quickly slithered away as the chaos continued.
They had spent nearly 3 hours in the paintball arena before the angels running it used magic to clean them and the arena itself of all the paint.
"It'sss a shame they had to clean it all up so fassst." Pentious said. "I noticed you were usssing your gun to actually try and paint an art piece on the wallsss! I never knew you wanted to be an artist!"
Cherri giggled. "Well...I was always pretty creative, I guess. It's just that, well...I was really interested in fireworks, and how I could make those pictures using fireworks in the sky, y'know? But...I also got a love for the thrills. Creativity and a love for the shit that goes boom is...not a good combination."
Pentious hummed. "No, I sssuppose it isn't. I mussst admit, I understand what you mean. Back when I was alive, I alwaysss had ideas for contraptions that weren't exactly...morally correct. Ssso, I think I had a desire for the thrill as well."
Cherri looked at him softly. "Yeah, but...that doesn't explain how you ended up in Hell. I mean! You're sweet! Kind! You are honestly the sweetest fuckin' person I met there! I don't understand how someone as sweet as you ended up in such a bad place..."
Pentious' cheeks reddened at all the compliments before his own eyes softened. "Well, ummm...let'sss jussst say-"
He then looked at his watch and his eyes widened. "Oh! I have to drop off Arthur! Sssshit, I forgot!!!"
Cherri's eye widened. "Wait...Arthur?"
Pentious turned towards her. "I sssuppose I never did tell you about my son!"
Cherri's eye bulged. "...YOUR REACTION TO ANGEL'S DADDY JOKE MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW..."
"He had me fooled for a moment." Pentious admitted before he pulled out a golden crystal and tapped it, creating a portal to a large playground.
He then took Cherri's hand and pulled her right through. "I apologize for thisss, my dear! We can jussst drop him off at his mother'sss and then we can continue our date! And you need to meet him anyway considering the 'OH MY GOD' look on your face!"
Then, GM poked his head through a portal. "You rang?"
"Oh! Sssorry!" Pentious said sheepishly.
GM chuckled. "'No worries' as you kids say!" He said before disappearing once again.
"Pen..." Cherri said nervously. "Please tell me I'm not a homewrecker. I-I know that it's probably been years and I've had more than one boyfriend, but-"
Pentious' eyes widened and he held her hands. "N-no, no, no! You're nothing like that! It'sss...complicated to explain, but I can promissse that you aren't breaking anything. But I'll explain after we drop him off. Hisss mother may be a little worried by now..."
And then, a familiar voice cried out. "Papa!!!"
Pentious turned and his eyes lit up as an amphibian Winner who looked a lot like him ran over. He slithered over and scooped the young boy into his arms. "Arthur!!! There you are!!! Did you have fun?"
"Uh-huh! Miss Jophiel put me in charge for a while!!!" Arthur said with a nod.
"Not sssurprising. You're very resssponsible!" Pentious smiled.
Arthur then noticed Cherri and gasped. "Papa? Who's that?"
Pentious smiled. "Remember that, err, close friend I told you about? In Hell?"
"...Apple Bomb?" Arthur asked, tilting his head.
Cherri's heart melted, and she giggled. "Close, little man! I'm Cherri. It's so good to meet you!"
"Ohhh! It's good to meet you too!!!" Arthur smiled. "You have one eye! That's super cool!"
Pentious laughed. "Yesss, it is. Now, let's get you to your mother, hmm?"
"Okay!" Arthur said with the brightest smile he could muster.
Cherri squealed a little. "Oh my gosh, that is so cuuute...!"
"He isss adorable." Pentious smiled, booping his son's nose.
Arthur giggled. "Papaaa!!!"
Pentious then took out the golden crystal again, summoning a portal to a house that looked to be straight out of the Victorian Era AKA when he was still alive.
They walked through and Pentious slithered up to the door with Arthur still in his arms and then rang the doorbell.
A few moments later, the door opened, revealing a reptilian Winner woman wearing a beautiful Victorian Era esque dress, with her long blonde hair tied up in a ponytail, and a hat on her head. She sighed in relief upon seeing the two. "There you two are! Edward, what am I going to do with you?" She asked playfully.
Pentious laughed sheepishly. "Sssorry, Victoria. I got dissstracted."
"Hi, Mama!!!" Arthur smiled as he leapt out of his father's arms and into a hug with his mother.
"Hello, my hoppy little frog!" Victoria cooed, nuzzling him. Then she noticed Cherri, and giggled. "Edward, I take it this is the girl you've been swooning over?"
Pentious blushed, but dragged over the clearly nervous Cherri. "Yesss! This is Cherri Bomb! The Heavenly Father hasss brought her and the ressst of my friends over for a visit! She and I were preoccupied with paintball."
Cherri giggled nervously, and very awkwardly did a curtsy. "Ummm, hello...?"
Victoria laughed. "Oh, there's no need for that, Miss Bomb! I'm happy to meet you!"
"R-really...?"
"Of course! After all, you make Edward so happy!"
Pentious smiled. "She doesss..."
Arthur then gasped. "Papa! You said she was a close friend! Not your girlfriend!"
"W-well, Arthur-"
"That means I have two moms!!!" Arthur cheered.
Cherri's cheeks turned red as Victoria began giggling. "W-wait a minute-"
"Mom 1!" Arthur said, poking Victoria's cheek and then pointing at Cherri. "And Mom 2!"
Cherri's face turned redder, and Victoria laughed. "Edward, if you don't mind, how about you two join us for dinner?"
"S-soundsss lovely." Pentious smiled, but noticed it was still the afternoon. "We'll sssee you then! I'll even bring my Egg Boiz!"
"Bye-bye, Papa! Bye-bye, Mom 2!" Arthur said with a wave.
"S-see you guys later!" Cherri said, waving as the two then left.
Pentious then looked at Cherri. "You did very well, my dear!"
Cherri gulped. "Think so?"
Pentious held her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "I know ssso. But you are probably confused about my family's situation with me, yesss?"
"Y-yeah, I...I'm kinda surprised that Victoria wasn't pissed at me for dating you."
"Well, I sssuppose I should start off by saying that while she wasss my wife...we weren't exactly in love. In fact, our marriage was arranged. We had no choice in the matter." He huffed. "My father simply told me: 'You get along well with her, so I'm marrying you off' and then bid me farewell. The assshole."
Cherri's eye immediately narrowed. "The dick wad..."
"Exactly!" Pentious cried. "Victoria and I were besst friends however, and we tried to make the mossst of it. On our 'honeymoon', we flat out told each other how we truly felt. But, we would have to act like we loved each other whenever in public. But then, one day, we...sssort of got drunk and Victoria got pregnant. Thingsss...got complicated after that. Arthur was born and we tried our best to raissse him..."
But then his eyes softened. "...but...child labor lawsss...weren't very...strict back then...Arthur wasss already working at 8, no matter how much either of usss hated it...and then...then he..."
Cherri's eye widened in horror.
Arthur had been overworked to death.
Without saying a word, she pulled Pentious into a tight hug.
Pentious' eyes widened and he hugged back, taking a deep breath. "...I snapped after that. I started building every war machine that I had in my head and I killed his murderers...but that did not make it better. I jussst started making excuses to take more lives until my own was taken. And that's how I landed in Hell...and met you years later."
"...If I ever see those fucking assholes in Hell...I'm going to make them bloody suffer..." Cherri snarled.
Pentious chuckled. "Already did...they died a few Exterminationsss ago..."
"Too bad. I would have loved to deglove their hands and feet Mexican cartel style."
Pentious then kissed her forehead. "I think you'll be delighted to know they were begging for mercy...but how about we continue our date inssstead of looking back on sssuch horrible memories? Besssidess...it really isss nice to get to speak to you this way."
Cherri grinned. "Sounds like a plan, baby...actually, I got a question."
"Hmm?"
"...do you still have two...?"
Pentious tilted his head before he saw that she was looking down specifically and his cheeks reddened. "Ummm...y-yesss?"
"...fuckin' jackpot."
(If it wasn't obvious enough, the characters of Victoria and Arthur belong to EmositeCC! The talented creator of a very good Hazbin Hotel comic!!! Admittedly, the origins here are not the exact same as here!
In the comic, Pentious was a pretty bad dad and Victoria thought that Pentious was in love with her during their marriage! I'd highly reccomend checking it out on their YouTube channel or whatever social media they got! And by the off-chance they end up reading this? Hope you don't mind!)
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