(WRITTEN BEFORE APOLOGY TOUR COMES OUT THIS MONTH)

The Big G was thrown onto some kind of large meeting table, still tied up by holy chains. Then, a light was shone right into his face.

"Alright, bucko!" A voice cried. "You answer to us now, Four Eyes!"

"Sir, who even is this?!" Another voice asked.

"He's really shiny." Another one said.

GM then looked around and saw...three Imps and a single Hellhound texting on her phone.

Imps and Hellhounds were the lowest of low in Hell's society. Demons with no supernatural powers in the slightest and often treated like pets or punching bags.

It was probably why Beelzebub turned into a Hellhound. She hated how terribly they were treated, but couldn't really do much to help their social status despite her own.

"Shut up, Mox!" The first Imp with a white scar on his face cried. "And I...don't actually know. I just saw him walking with King Lucifer, sooo...he's gotta be important."

"So, you asked us to kidnap him?!" 'Mox' cried.

GM then suddenly chuckled. "Oh, do not fret! I let this happen, I've never been kidnapped before! Is this what it's like? I have to say, I expected it to be a lot more life-threatening."

The first Imp blinked. "Oh! Oh, you want life-threatening?! Millie?!"

'Millie' then took out a giant chainsaw, starting it up with a psychotic grin.

GM...didn't even look phased.

"...okay, damn." The first Imp said. "Are you into this or-?"

"Gross." GM said, his four eyes narrowing. "And no. I'm just not threatened."

The first Imp groaned. "Well, fuck! How are we supposed to ask you for shit if you aren't scared enough to give it?!"

"What do you think I am?" GM asked.

'Mox' then went over. "I'm assuming a demon royal?"

"Demon?" GM repeated before laughing. "O-oh, no, no, no. I am far from a demon, Moxxie."

Moxxie blinked and stepped back. "...okay. The strange white-suited man knows my name. That's...concerning."

Millie then walked over, suddenly nuzzling Moxxie. The two must've been together. "It's alright, honey! I'll fuck him up if he tries anything!"

GM couldn't help but smile at the love these two clearly had for each other before looking back at the first Imp. "So! Blitzo, was it?"

The first Imp groaned. "For fuck's sake, how does everyone know my goddamn name and still get it wrong?! The O is silent!"

"Oh! Apologies! Blitz." GM nodded.

Blitz blinked. "...oh. Uhh...thanks."

"Sir, if he's not a demon royal, then maybe we should let him go." Moxxie said.

"Oh, hell no! He's still gotta be rich or powerful or something! He was just casually talking with Lucifer of all people!" Blitz cried. "I mean, that blondie hasn't been seen out of his castle in...uhh..."

"Years?" Moxxie said.

Blitz nodded. "Yeah!"

"My boy really needs to go outside more." GM hummed. "But for your information, I am not exactly rich. I'm not even from Hell."

Blitz blinked. "Say what?"

The Hellhound then groaned. "Are you all fucking blind? Look at him! He's glowing and shit!!! He's from Heaven!!!"

The three Imps then looked at GM and stood back. "Ohhhh..."

"I'm surprised you didn't figure that out." GM said, sitting up despite the chains. "But I suppose the eyes do make me look a little spooky, ha! But yes! I am from Heaven. I'm just here to visit my granddaughter and her hotel. As for why I was talking with Lucifer? Well, every father should be able to talk to their son once in a while."

Blitz blinked. "...wait...son?"

Millie turned. "Lucifer has a dad?"

Moxxie's jaw then dropped, since he actually did some research on their King's origins.

Blitz noticed. "Yo! Mox! You know something! Fucking spill it!"

"...ummm...s-sir...if what he's saying is true...this is God."

Blitz whipped his head towards GM. "Say what now?"

The Hellhound then looked at GM as well, her red eyes wide. "...no shit?"

"Perhaps I should've taken a form that was more recognizable. A lot of people can't seem to tell who I am." GM chuckled. "The beard is itchy though."

Blitz was left there, trying to process who they were talking to. "...you're telling us you're God? And you're real?"

"We're talking, are we not?" GM asked.

Millie hummed. "Okie dokie! Prove it!"

GM nodded and then effortlessly shattered the holy chains into thousands of pieces, standing up properly.

Blitz's eyes widened. "HOW DID-"

He then walked over to the Hellhound. "Loona, was it? May I borrow this?"

Loona then watched him take her phone. "THE FUCK, DUDE!?"

GM then tossed the phone into the air...and when it landed, it was now some kind of technological demon or lifeform with a screen for a face.

The four stared in awe, looking the former phone up and down.

The screen on the lifeform then lit up. "You have one text from 'Tex'."

GM smiled as he did the 'jazz hands' towards the lifeform. "Eh? Eh? Pretty cool, right? Don't worry, they're not sentient."

He then tossed the lifeform back into the air, turning it back into the phone and then handed it back to Loona.

Loona looked from her phone back to GM over and over again, still processing what had just happened.

"Your mini-computer is quite fascinating by the way." GM said before turning to the imps. "Believe me now? If not, I have a musical number planned for this occasion-"

"No, no, no! We believe you!" Blitz said. "...fuck, you just let us kidnap you, didn't you?"

"I already said that." GM chuckled. "No one could kidnap me if they tried."

Moxxie gulped. "A-are you going to kill us?"

GM's eyes widened. "Oh, heavens no! What reason would I have to-"

He then hummed as he used some of his foresight. "Hang on...you're the four that have been killing people on Earth, aren't you?"

Blitz laughed sheepishly, well aware of the power that God himself had. He was very likely bulletproof. "Uhhh...I-I mean, it's just business! H-hahahaha..."

GM's eyes narrowed a bit before he sighed. "While you deserve a punishment, I will not be killing any of you."

Millie's eyes widened. "Wait, seriously? But...we killed a lot of people."

"Millie, sweetie, you're not helping our case." Moxxie said.

GM hummed. "While that is true...you are, at the end of the day, killing horrible people. Most of the Sinners that come to you had their lives ended by someone just as horrible as they were in life, and...as much as it breaks my heart, humans die everyday. Sometimes by natural causes, sometimes by a cruel hand of fate, an accident, or in this case...murder."

Blitz blinked. "Okay, lemme get this straight. So, you aren't mad?"

"I didn't say that." GM said.

They gulped.

"But, I'm just saying you all have a point. Demons work on Earth all the time and at the end of the day, you're merely speeding up the process of a horrible person getting their deserved karma." GM said. "However...what I will not excuse is the fact that innocent people get caught in the crossfire."

Blitz grinned sheepishly. "...d-do they now? I-I can't think of a-"

"Spring Break, the opera, a minority of the DHORK Agents, the lumberjacks, Los Angeles, the campers, annnnd that one incident where you murdered a gang of crooks but a little boy had seen it all. That boy has not slept since." GM said.

Moxxie tugged at his shirt collar. "W-when you put it like that, I...guess we haven't exactly been careful lately."

"Precisely, Moxxie." GM said. "So, a punishment is in order. But until I decide what that is, why did you kidnap me anyway? To hold me ransom?"

Blitz rubbed the back of his neck. "...uhhh...personal shit."

GM hummed. "Okay. That being?"

"I...needed you to get me a meeting with Prince Stolas." Blitz said.

GM tilted his head before he closed his eyes and used his foresight to catch up on the relationship between this Imp and one of the Ars Goetia.

But, all four of his eyes snapped open once he was done. "...you fucked up."

Moxxie turned. "What!? Sir, you said it went okay!"

Blitz turned. "Well-"

"You both fucked up." GM said. "That confrontation could not have gone any worse- That's a lie. It somehow could have gone worse."

"Okay, I think we need an explanation!" Moxxie cried.

Blitz opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

GM sighed. "May I speak with your boss in private? I do not think he wants to tell you all the details...what I can tell you is your jobs are safe. This is something involving him and him alone."

Moxxie and Millie looked at each other before looking back at GM.

"...I mean, you're the big boss of the universe...do whatever the fuck you want." Loona said.

GM nodded before gesturing for Blitz to follow him into his office.

Blitz followed and then closed the door behind him. "...how badly did I fuck up?"

"Very badly." GM said.

Blitz sighed. "Great. Like that's anything fucking new...look! He just laid out this 'feelings' bullshit on me out of nowhere-!"

"It wasn't just that night." GM said. "Your entire relationship with Stolas has been unhealthy from the start...and both of you are at fault. Albeit, unintentionally due to your poor communication skills."

Blitz blinked. "...okay, that's one way of putting it."

GM sighed. "Blitz...you used him. You were after his book and you made him believe that you were there for him after he had gone through a lifetime of arranged misery. And then, you used him again at Ozzie's."

"...shit, I...guess I did." Blitz muttered.

GM's eyes then softened. "And then you assumed that all he wanted out of you was sex and nothing else. And yes, he did treat you like his plaything instead of an equal and he is at fault for that...but he isn't like the other Royals. And deep down, you know that not all Royals are the same. Stolas is a perfect example."

Blitz sighed. "C'mon, how?"

"You don't even believe your own words right now." GM said. "His texts in the form of paragraphs, his small gestures to show he cares...and him giving you that Asmodean Crystal so you can continue your business without your horrible deal. He cares for you, Blitz...you were just too blind to notice...because you don't think you are capable of being loved."

Blitz then sat down, his eyes narrowing. "...if you're all-knowing or some shit, you should know why I'm not."

"I have seen your life, Blitz...and while I do see a man pushing others away...I also see a man who is only doing that because of his own self-loathing. You are not as horrible as you think you are."

Blitz gritted his teeth a bit. "How do you know?"

GM smiled kindly. "Fizzarolli was one of your first and greatest mistakes...yet. You're friends with him again after all these years. You also gave Moxxie and Millie a job so they can support each other and be together, even helping save Moxxie from a Mafia wedding. You gave Loona a home and while much like you, she doesn't like to show it...deep down, she truly appreciates it. You made her feel wanted in a world that tossed her aside...and as Stolas said himself? You made him happy...and you feel the same way. That's why this is hurting you so much."

Blitz was left silent, looking down.

GM then sat down on a chair he summoned. "You should not have assumed that his feelings were fake. You should not have used him or assumed that all Royals are the same because much like you and me, we're all different deep down. And you should not have blown up at him either, despite the fact that admittedly, you were acting off pure emotion and I can't really blame you for yelling...much like you don't know him, Stolas doesn't know you."

Blitz then took a deep breath as he felt some tears in his eyes before he quickly wiped them away. "...then what the fuck do I do? I-I just hurt him again like I always do...h-how do I stop being this way?"

GM's eyes softened again. "You need to realize that everyone is capable of change and love. You are capable of giving love, which means you are capable of receiving it. You have hurt people, but use Fizz as a perfect example that you can make amends to those you have wronged."

"...how do you know if that will work...?"

"You don't feel so bad about Fizz anymore, do you?" GM smiled. "What happened to him as an accident, and you both understand that now...maybe try apologizing to others such as Verosika. As my granddaughter says, sorry is where it starts."

"And if they don't forgive me?"

"You shouldn't expect that." GM sighed. "Their feelings are valid...but you need to show them that you have changed. That you understand what you did to them was wrong...and you might be surprised what happens."

"...but-"

"Blitz...if you want to move on from the past, you can't stay in it. You need to see that you can do just as much good as you can bad. Everyone has the capacity for change...and you clearly want to. You just have to take that first step."

"...and what about Stolas?"

GM sighed. "I honestly think you need to better yourself first before you try and have such a serious relationship with him. And remember, Stolas is just as much at fault here as you are...I won't be getting you a meeting with him, but I will talk with him."

Blitz rubbed his hand across his face before he nodded. "...okay."

GM then stood. "I will be assigning you a therapist though. I may have a way with words, but one talk between you and I isn't going to magically change things for the better."

Blitz scoffed a bit. "You hardly know me and you do that? Didn't you just go on a tangent earlier about how you were mad at me for killing people?"

"I am still cross about that, but I think you will be more careful from now on. And if not, your eventual punishment is just going to be worse." GM shrugged. "But it won't be death or the end of your business, I can assure you that. I'm well aware Imps are not exactly in a great position financially."

They then began walking towards the door with GM looking at him. "Remember what I said, Blitz...everyone is capable of love. Both giving and receiving."

Blitz was still silent as they walked back into the office, where Moxxie, Millie, and Loona were waiting.

"Well! I shall be off!" GM smiled.

Moxxie turned. "Ummm, Mr. God?"

"Please. Mr. God was my father. Call me Big G." GM grinned.

Moxxie blinked. "...you have a dad?"

"No, I just always wanted to make that joke."

"Oh...well. I just wanted to apologize for our kidnap attempt."

GM chuckled. "You wear your heart on your sleeve, Moxxie. Apology accepted! Oh, and Loona?"

Loona turned. "Yeah?"

"Stop calling him fat. Moxxie has enough self-insecurity and you do too." GM said before facing Millie. "And Millie?"

Millie tilted her head.

"Call your family more often." GM said.

And then, with a tip of his hat, The Father of Heaven went out the door.

"...that went well." Moxxie hummed.

GM then peeked in. "I've just come up with a punishment!!!"

He then snapped his fingers...and in the room materialized a dark red and black demonic horse with almost needle like legs suddenly appeared.

"...SPINDLE?!" Blitz squealed.

"Everytime you kill an innocent, your former pet will do this!"

Spindle then headbutted each of them, causing them to groan in pain as they laid on the floor.

"Alrighty then! Farewell!" GM said as he left.