Those Feelings: Special Chapter

KENNEDY'S POV

I marched into the cafeteria, scanning the place. Today, I decided to wear my hair down since I was to depressed to fix it up today. I also wore the first thing I grabbed from my closet which was pretty much an old t-shirt, a hoodie and worn out jeans paired with my simple rubber shoes.

I avoided Aesha-not to mention Brent- because I wanted to be on my own. And it looks like my wish was granted again today. Through my black rimmed glasses, I can see that our usual table was empty. Brent was sitting with the popular group and so was Aesha, who was sitting beside Cole.

What? So my two best friends in the whole world were going to just leave me like that? Are they going to pretend that I didn't exist?

Fine, I can live with that.

I took one last look at the friends-or ex friends- of mine then left the cafeteria with my fists clenched.

There was nowhere I could go to. There was nobody I could go to. Unlike Aesha, who had Cole. She was lucky.

Well, why haven't I thought of this happening? Of course Brent would step up into the popular rank and so would Aesha. Nobody sees a flaw in them, nobody sees a reason why to not let them be one of the popular kids.

But me? Huh, I was just the nerd, nobody important.

Of course they would leave me out. What if Brent had a girlfriend? What if Cole and Aesha were dating? What if I would become that loner who just follows them around, hoping others would treat me like them?

Those were nightmares. And I'm surprised I wasn't crying yet.

I walked quietly through the hallway, clutching my books to my chest. I think I know the right place for me.

~~~~~~~~~~

I stepped right in the library. It was almost people-less and that's how I like it. I inhaled the sweet book scent (yes, they have a smell) and walked towards the tall bookshelves.

Tables and chairs were arranged neatly around the place. Bookshelves were gathered in different sides and so were the computers. The whole room was air-conditioned.

But I wasn't here to read.

I reached a little part of the library where it was completely deserted. I lay down my things on the floor and sat on the little corner. Nobody would disturb me here, for sure.

I hugged my knees and buried my head in them. Almost everyday I was happy but now? What the hell is wrong with me? I just wanted to curl up into a ball and sob my heart out.

"I hate it. I hate everything." I whispered to myself.

That's when I heard the hushed voices. I crawled quietly out of my hiding place and peered around. The place was empty except for several people gathered around.

I guess they were younger than me, around fifteen, I guess? They were pretty much around two people...

I stood up, silently and carefully hiding behind a bookshelf.

"Just do it already!" Someone spoke up and the others cheered. Then I heard a high pitched scream.

My eyes widened. I couldn't see what was happening because of the crowd blocking my way but I'm pretty sure it was bad.

Then there was another scream, like before but only louder. This time, I bolted from the shelf and quickly pushed through the crowd, not caring what they say or what they do.

I bit my lip when I saw the whole thing.

It was none other than my best friend's siblings, Sean and Shaelon. They were standing in the middle of the crowd. Shaelon was kneeling on the floor, her face tear stained. There was a cut on the left side of her cheek and one little cut on her forehead.

And beside her, towering over was her brother,Sean, with a pair of scissors on his hand. And he looked pretty proud of himself.

I rushed immediately towards Shaelon. Noticing a little blood dripping from her face, I flashed a murderous glare towards Sean. "How could you do that to your sister?!"

"It was a dare!" he explained.

"You don't have the right to cut  Shaelon like that!" I yelled back.

"Well, I'm sorry, you're not Aesha so you don't have the right to tell me what to do! You're just a nerd." He said rudely.

I decided it'll be best to just leave him. Supporting Shaelon, we walked out of the crowd. I can hear her crying softly as we made our way out of the library, ignoring the protests of the other kids.

~~~~~~~~~~

I played substitute sister for the rest  of the lunch period. Now, I'm walking alone, heading towards the doors of the school so I can get home.

But of course life would plan to make everything worse.

As soon as I got to the door, a couple who were lip-locking were blocking my way. They were deeply kissing each other, as if they were going to suck each other alive.

When they pulled away, sensing my presence, I gasped inwardly.

The kissing couple were, of course, the one and only Brent Frinnate and Willow Thompson.

Oh, God just kill me now. My heart is already shattering.

"Excuse me, but we're busy here," Willow snapped at me as they pulled away from each other.

"Yeah, nerdy, go away," Brent agreed.

My fists clenched and my face twisted into a scowl. "Excuse you, you were the one blocking the door."

"Oh, is that our problem?" Willow asked, pecking Brent's cheek.

"You're the problem!" I screamed at both of them. As they went back to their make out session, I stormed towards another exit.

~~~~~~~~~

I stood alone in the parking lot, so desperate for a ride home. Aesha was of course catching a ride with fire boy. Brent-the jerkface- was hanging out with his so called friends. That left me with only one option: Cylene.

But why would I hope for that? Cylene's busy especially with a contest in the city and so definitely she'd be out practicing with her band.

But a purple and black figure brightened me up a little. In no time, Cylene's car stopped in front of me.

"Hey kiddo," she greeted me. I managed a little smile and climbed on the passenger seat. "Where are Aesha and Brent?" she asked me.

"Uh," If Cylene found about Cole and Aesha, she would really get mad. I'm a loyal best friend, not some friend abandoner like Aesha. "Aesha's catching a ride with Brent." 

"Why didn't you join them?"

"I-I wanted to go home early. Aesha's with Brent to his job." Kennedy Kate Keldridge, you are the queen of excuses.

"Are they going out or something?" Cylene joked.

"Cy!"

She started the car and drove out of the school's parking lot. "Are you still mad at Aesha?" I asked nervously. "Yes," she replied coldly.

I just leaned back on my seat and sighed.

~~~~~~~~~~~

When the was about to turn to my street I said, "Stop the car,"

The car screeched into a halt then Cylene turned to face me with one brow raised. "What?"

"I want to hang out at your house." I said confidently.

"Why?"

"I just..." When I couldn't think of an answer, Cylene steered the car, heading to their mansion.

When we got there, I secretly hoped Aesha and Cole wouldn't be inside or anywhere near, hanging out or-worse- making out. It made me shudder thinking about the ice girl and fire boy getting together.

"Why'd you suddenly want to go here?" Cylene asked. Dang, Cy, what's with that curiosity? The real reason is I want to stay away from the jerk who happened to be living across from me.

"I was thinking of a jam." I suggested while her eyes lit up in an instant, "Yeah, sure,"

We went up to the usual place-the attic. But it felt so lonely not having Aesha and Brent around. 

Cylene picked up her guitar and plugged it in. It was pretty much the first time I've sung without Brent. He was my partner in singing, we were a duet. Our voices fit together perfectly, but he's gone now.

"Whaddya wanna sing?" Cylene asked excitedly.

I told her the perfect song to fit what I was feeling right now. She informed me that she could play it then I grabbed a mic. ( I don't own music/ the song)

You're on the phone with your girlfriend-she's upset, I sang, savoring every moment, She's going off about something that you said. She doesn't get your humor like I do.

Godammit, I'm singing about my crush.

I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night. I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like. She'll never know your story like I do. Oh, Willow, I know him better so back off!

But she wears short skirts. I wear t-shirts. She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers, dreaming 'bout the day when you wake up and find that what you're looking for has been here the whole time. Didn't he ever feel the same as me? Did he really think of me as a friend only?

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you, been here all along so why can't you see? You belong with me. You belong with me. My voice was surprisingly great alone and with the music. It was like I was letting out my feelings.

Walking the streets with you and your worn out jeans. I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be. Laughing on the park bench thinking to myself, " Hey isn't this easy?" The times I've spent with him, all those memories came flooding back to me as I closed my eyes.

And you've got a smile that can light up this whole town. I haven't seen it in awhile since she brought you down. I miss his smile, even though it can be a playful smirk or a cocky grin.

You say you're fine-I know you better than that. Hey, what you doing with a girl like that?

She wears high heels, I wear sneakers. She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers, dreaming 'bout the day when you wake up and find that what you're looking for has been here the whole time. Yeah, I don't wear tons of makeup, I don't wear mini skirts and dresses and I'm not a flirt but I loved him truly.

I sung the chorus again, thinking how he deserved me, not Willow. Thinking how he should've gone with me. We should've been together.

Standing by and waiting at your back door. All this time how could you not know, baby, you belong with me, you belong with me. How could he be so blind? How could he not see that I'm not complete without him? How could he not see that I care for him a lot? How could he not see that I'm heartbroken?

Oh, I remember you were driving to my house in the middle of the night. I'm the one who makes you laugh, when you know you're 'bout to cry. I know your favorite songs and you tell me about your dreams. I think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me. I know he's comfortable around me. I know he likes me around him.

Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you? Been here all along so why can't you see? You belong with me.

I finished the rest of the song, still not satisfied. I didn't let out everything yet. I haven't cried yet.

But I was already hurt that he left me. He just left us like that as if he doesn't care at all. I wasn't sure now whether I still liked him.

Brent Frinnate, you belong with me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I convinced Cylene that I'll be fine walking home even though it was a little far from there. Iwalked home with ease, though when I was nearing my house, all hell broke lose.

The red car was zooming towards me, like the driver did not care if I died. I screamed out loud and the car abruptly stopped. Out stepped from the car was Brent.

"What is wrong with you?!" I yelled at him.

"You were standing on the way, Nerdy." He told me arrogantly.

I rolled my eyes. Seriously, how big can his ego get? "Oh, it's my fault now? You think it's a good idea to get me run over by a car?" I snapped back.

"Maybe I shouldn't have stopped that car." He said.

I can't take it anymore. He was being so big of a jerk. "You left us so suddenly! You're just a big jerk who didn't care about your true friends and you came running away from us. What happened to that kid who was funny and cheery, huh? You changed, Brent, why?" I tried a lot holding the tears back. I jabbed a finger on his chest.

"Didn't you ever think of how I felt? That kid who gets picked on, who wasn't anywhere near popularity? He's gone, Ken. Can't you just accept who I am now?" He shouted.

"Didn't you ever think about how I felt towards you? I-I....." I just couldn't get those words out of me. It was too risky admitting my feelings to him. 

Then I just burst into tears right there. He didn't do anything. The idiot just stood there with his fists clenched and his teeth gritted. What happened to you, Brent?

"You're too soft, Ken. Learn to stand up for yourself." he said softly and sternly. Then he left, heading to his house.

I did the same and went straight to my bedroom, planning to cry myself to sleep.

I hate him I hate him a lot.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pretty sad chapter right? Who knew Kennedy felt like this? I like this special chap though. Tears for our dear Kennedy! I can't load the song though -_- so there's no media.

-Vireen