Ten years.

It's been ten years since Anthony and I dated.

I miss those days.

He held my hand and gave me small gifts every once and a while. If I was lucky, he'd give me small kisses up my neck, making me shiver. We even had sex once, but I'd have given that up in a heartbeat if I'd known he'd break up with me the next day.

I remember how it all got started. As a matter of fact, I may never forget it. Anthony and I were at his house, playing video games when he leaned over and kissed me.

"What was that?" I asked calmly.

He shrugged. "I dunno. I just like you I guess." I blinked. "Wanna go out?"

I laughed. "Dude are you drunk? Where were you before I got here?"

He laughed back. "The bathroom getting high, clearly." We laughed and I took his hand in mine.

"Well, I guess I'll date you, high or not." I kept smiling and stared into his chocolatey eyes.

He smiled back and we returned to playing the original Halo.

God, what happened?

Me.

We got into one fight. One. And Anthony broke up with me two days later.

I had been cleaning his house when I accidentally knocked over a picture of his mom, who'd died only a year before.

"Ian!" I heard the shout. He took one look at what I'd done and started crying. He thought I'd done it on purpose and threw me out. He wouldn't talk or listen to me until he texted me the next day, saying that he wanted to have sex with me.

It was his way to say goodbye.

"I'm sorry, Ian. I used you for a social experiment."

"You were experimenting with guys?"

He nodded.

Once again, we were in Anthony's house, sitting on his couch. The picture of his mom was in a new frame and back on the shelf.

"When we were dating, I actually wanted you, but when you broke the picture of my mom, I realized that I was just thankful for you through my time of hardship. I'm sorry, Ian."

I forced myself to hold back my tears. "It's cool. I understand." I punched his arm playfully. He sighed and smiled.

"Good. I'm glad to get that off my chest." He stood and held out his hand. I took it and he pulled me up. I squeezed his hand before he let go.

"So do you wanna play video games?" He asked me, either ignoring or completely missing my slight gesture.

I shook my head sadly. "Nah. I have some errands to run," I lied. "See ya later."

Why did I let him slip away from me? I miss him. I need him. I want him back. Shit. Maybe I'll start an experiment of my own.

I stand up and right as I'm about to leave, on my way to God knows where, I run into Anthony. Perfect.

I grab his face in my hands and force our lips together. He doesn't pull away, mostly cause I won't let him, but when I finally let go, he doesn't say anything.

"That was MY experiment," I tell him and walk out the door.