(Ok so if you don't know Mrs.Martha is Mrs.Washington also known as Washington's wife)

So I'll be at the orphanage today. I guess I should start cleaning Margarita's and Maria's room. So I headed in there and nothing in there was that bad it was just the closet and they forgot to put everything that was on the desk back away. I think that bad so I just started putting everything away. Oh what the classes I forgot about that, if anyone ever try to sneak in we already have guns everywhere.

So since the room wasn't that bad I just left it alone. I start walking over to George's and Seabury's room peek in and nothing is wrong. Wow it's funny, actually quite surprising. Do you know how bratty George ||| is?

I'm just really surprised that he got his room clean before I had to say anything about it. Maybe because he sharing a room with Seabury. So I don't know what I'm supposed to do! Everyone always has their room clean especially because I knew that I was going to come in there.

Going over to Eliza's in Angelica's room. Like always nothing is wrong. These kids are perfect well almost... I mean we have some mentally insane ones and major depression disordered ones so I guess they're not exactly perfect but they are in some kind of way in mine.

So I guess there's not that much to check out... I mean Burr's just going to be perfect because you can never find anything wrong with his room. He likes to show that off sometimes. I feel like mainly they do this because they know that I'll find something. Even though I don't like going through anybody stuff I do look through it at least once. Anyway it is a part of my job.

My husband told me that I should always make sure I know what they're doing so I know they're healthy and unhealthy mindsets. That's why we have therapist for them, I've been through John's drawings. It's my job. I mean I don't officially work here but partially, yeah.

James and Thomas don't really have anything bad in the room. The only thing is that there's papers everywhere. I wonder why. But I don't go through this stuff because you know I don't like doing that. But what I do is read some of them the paper airplanes unfolded ones. Oh, good love notes! I absorb enough information in a good 5 Seconds. Absorbing information is my thing. That's why I was Chrome the smartest girl in the classroom and he was the smartest male.

Theodosia is in a separate room. I just speak in there once and see a book on the floor. She's going to freak over that later. She thinks that if there's one thing on the floor and the whole room is clean the room is disgusting. It's pretty hilarious to me because she always gives one of the biggest reactions and I love it.

I don't know what I should do now, I mean I do want to see what's in Hamilton and John's room but I'm scared. Is it dirty? I don't think so. John seems like the kind of person who doesn't keep their room dirty or anything was right?

So you know what I do? I go inside. So now what I'm afraid to do is actually see what's actually in here. I close my eyes when I entered because I was scared of what actually was in here.

Opening my eyes slowly... Oh my God it's dirty. I really thought that John would know better. John at the top bunk now so he should not have done this much damage to his room. I mean it's really good and stuff it's just there's cups and all kinds of stuff in here. What's this...?

Oh my goodness... It's his diary. I didn't think that he would have one and he said he never did! He lied? Oh well, everyone lies at least once in their life. I don't want to read it but I don't want my husband to read it. Plus I know that they can trust me and I can trust them.

I open it and just scan through it. I absorb enough information. I think. Oh no... He wrote about that time. The time when he first got dropped off here. His mother is so cruel She was so rudeol and, and... I couldn't stand her.

She certainly had no idea who she was talking to! Martha Washington! I honestly don't know how... I kept my cool... I guess it's because we were both pregnant women and we both know what we were going through. But why would she try to take John? His mother left him here for a reason! Even though she didn't love him we did! She needs to get over it.

I just really hope this parents are treating his siblings terrible as well. They could come here if they like but... Her.

That bitch.

I really don't think I should we what she said and I wont. But if I did do you promise not to tell him what I read? I really don't want him to be like 'you... you read my diary!!' And not trust me anymore.

Obviously he would trust me if I did, he just have to shush me every time I brought the subject up. Which I think is pretty cute. I love that he wants a relationship with Alexander and that he's really nice to him and we became friends with him the very first day they came. That was so amazing.

It was amazing because after his mother said he was really bad at socializing and hated everyone he became instant friends with Margarita and Alexander. They're two different kinds of people. When is mentally, physically and emotionly and the other one is always trying to help him be better and always knows what to do to for fill his legacy.

What do I have to scan through Alexander's papers all it does is talk about what he wants to do and that he can have a legacy Sunday. I love seeing that. He is so creative and he just loves talking about so many kinds of stuff and he has so much to say all the time! I love all these children they're so creative and individual.

Yes, even George the third is creative and individual. He is reluctant most of time but I do trust him and he trust me. Plus he even told me about his own crush on Seabury.

They're all so individual and I just love them for that. Most of them don't even have the same. Just like Aaron and Alexander. A lot of people think that they were going out or something like that because of how mean they were treating each other. Even though Alexander really did hate that title of them going out he did try to fight at least one person.

Hopefully that he doesn't fight anybody at school. We can't afford them getting expelled or suspended. Just because they got right out of private school doesn't mean they know what they're doing in public.

At first me and Washington didn't even trust them going to public school. At first we hated the thought of them even going to private. At home I'd ask him questions like why he didn't want to take them and he'd always give the same answer.

"I'm afraid."

If you don't know why he's afraid he's afraid of them getting in trouble or even getting bullied. Most of them where you can believe for being who they are. That's why they're here. And I love all of them. I love that they can't wait for my baby to be born. I just love them I think. Children, they're so playful and so creative.

But knowing that we have mentally, emotionally and physically her kids is heartbreaking.

A let out a really comfortable sigh well I'm going through what's underneath their bed. What's underneath our bed is the photo album we've had since they've came. When the first one of them came we started making that photo album. When the first one of them came that's when we came!

The first one was Alexander. His mother signed him in... Before...

I dropped a tear on to the photo that I'm holding. It's a tear of one Alexander was so... I start sniffing and now I'm hyperventilating. I don't like my husband seeing me like this so hopefully he doesn't! I get so emotional!!

My husband calls me, I wipe my tears and make sure I'm not crying anymore. Put the blocks away and as he walks over to where I am I start folding up the clothing that they didn't.

"Are you picking up the children today?" He Questions.

"Yes, I am." I reply. I just got so formal! That happens all the time. Last time he saw me sad and I broke down because of something that was sad happened he almost cried and I hate seeing that... It almost made me feel so much worst.

So we have our own little room for the staff members. Since I play a really important role I have my own but I share it with my husband. I'm napping in there at this time right now. I hear my alarm go off in a sit-up 30 minutes until the kids get out.

Put my shoes back on tie my hair up. Start rubbing my eyes because I know how comfortable I was. But still, it does take 30 minutes to get there. So I should start going now.

I get into the van after grabbing my keys and purse and money. Turn on the radio and I just play a song by Queen naija. I don't really know what it's about but I think it's called medicine. I understand... Oh now I get it. He cheated on her.

So while I'm driving on the freeway I already see the school. Have I gone that far? Wow.

I pull up in front of the school and just wait for the kids. 15 minutes left? Oh my goodness. I see a whole bunch of other parents too. I forgot the progress reports are coming. When I was a kid I've never really likes progress reports. Even though they were always good for me and I never got whooped or anything I was really annoyed when they brought up the fact that progress reports were coming soon.

When the bell finally rings all the kids leave their classrooms. I'm just waiting in the car for them. They finally see the van and run over here. I have so much to talk about!

Then... When John enters the car I get that flash back. His Diary. I left that on the floor! He's definitely going to know that I went through it.

I can remember at least one thing that I saw. And it was all about Alexander. Alexander Hamilton. All he wrote about in that page.

'Alexander Hamilton is the name of the boy I like! Yes I'm gay still... But guess what? I'm homosexual and But guess what? I'm homosexual and I love it and I love my bisexual Crush. Even if I don't end up with him, I have the rights to say I was loved by Alexander Hamilton. He is so sweet and amazing. I cannot bear to see him with anyone else. And if I do, the Lord has directed me in the wrong way. Oh my Alexander Hamilton, don't ever leave my side. Don't ever. I love you too much. And if that's so hard for me to admit, then I will say it to your face. I'll let you find out yourself. And if you don't... I'll have to convince you of my true love and that it is not a phase. Because God damn it Alexander Hamilton, You are the one I love and the one I only love. Forever. And no one will ever take you from me. I pray.'

My heart is melting. I love this.