if i see any of y'all calling mars annoying or saying she's overreacting, i'm throwing hands. she's 13, and believe it or not, that's still a kid! she isn't even in high school!
just because YOU wouldn't react the way she did, doesn't mean she's wrong in doing so. she feels betrayed, she was scared, she's upset. she has every RIGHT to feel these things and has every right to want to have time for herself and be ALONE

yes, she can be stubborn, but again: SHE'S A KID. she's not being dramatic. or rude. or annoying. she's reacting.

so please, for the love of god, stop belittling a 13 year old character's feelings. it's pathetic to see; some of you need to learn to put yourself in other people's shoes.

FOURTEEN
The Sun Can Burn

Mars had been giving Elias the silent treatment for three days.

Well, the semi-silent treatment. She only talked to him when necessary, like asking about dinner or homework she was stuck on. Other than that, nothing. He knew she could be stubborn, but he didn't know she could be that stubborn.

He had just picked her up from their neighbor's house after work, and just like every other day since their falling out, she didn't even look at him. She just waited for him to unlock the door so she could disappear inside.

But it was getting unbearably painful at this point.

"Mars," he said, making her stop in her tracks. "Can we talk?"

"No."

He clenched his jaw, trying to ignore the ache in his chest. "Mars. I'm sorry for yelling at you. I know that was probably scary, but I promise you I'll never do it again. Can you please look at me?"

"I don't want to."

"Then can you at least talk to me? Or listen. You don't have to look at me."

She didn't respond to him verbally. But her walking right up the stairs was an answer in itself.

Elias dropped down onto the couch and leaned over, burying his face in his hands. How much longer would it be like this? He had never gone this long without talking to her — normally talking to her. How was he supposed to get her to listen?

He didn't know how. He'd tried everything. Was it supposed to be this hard?

This whole situation had been dragging him down for the past few days. He couldn't stop thinking about it, couldn't stop going over the possibilities of what would've happened if he talked to her sooner, if he just told the truth as soon as she asked instead of hesitating.

His bad mood was obvious to anyone who was even remotely close to him. Gale noticed, Felix and Marco and the Anthonys noticed — Roman noticed, most of all. Even when he told everyone he was fine, Roman was the only one to seem fully unconvinced.

God — Roman. Elias couldn't help but huff out a sad laugh into his palms. He was so blatantly worried; you could see it in his eyes, in his texts, in the things he said. Elias forgot the last time someone cared about him that much.

He wasn't sure he ever had a partner that cared to that extent.

Elias thought that whoever Roman ended up with in the future would be so, so lucky. If he cared for Elias that much, he couldn't even imagine how he'd be toward a lover.

Ding.

And speak of the devil.

Roman -
You like cats, right??

Roman sent a photo

Roman -
(:

It was a picture of one of the cutest cats Elias had seen in his life. It had an orange coat and eyes the same color, pressing its body up against Roman's legs.

Elias -
Whose is it??

Roman -
Idk it just came up to me

Roman -
It's so cute I just wanna take it home ):

Elias -
Well I'm sure it already belongs to someone, so

Roman -
Don't crush my dreams

Roman -
Are you doing any better? (:

He smiled to himself. Roman never seemed to be asking out of a feeling of obligation, but because he genuinely wanted to know.

Elias -
I could be better

Roman -
Do you wanna talk about it?? I get why you wouldn't, but I'm here to listen

Elias -
It's a lot

Roman -
I don't mind

Elias -
You never do, huh?

Roman -
(:

Elias -
I wouldn't really want to talk about it over text?? So I don't wanna bother you

Roman -
I'm free to call or come by, whatever you want

Elias was kind of hoping he would read that and think "oh yeah, too much." But no — he should've known Roman would say something like that. Why is he so nice to me? Elias couldn't understand it. Was he like that to everyone he knew?

He just didn't want to feel like he was burdening him or keeping him from more important things.

More important people. What about that person he was interested in?

Elias -
You can come by

As much as he liked to tell Roman he was allowed to do whatever he wanted, Elias could be a little selfish.

Roman -
Okay, do you want me to bring anything? (:

No human was completely selfless.

Elias -
No it's okay

He put his phone down and leaned back, tilting his head back to look up at the second floor. Mars' door was still closed, no surprise there. He closed his eyes and sighed. He hated this. She wanted him to explain things, but she wouldn't even let him talk to her. Hell, she wouldn't even make eye contact with him.

This was easily one of the worst feelings he'd ever experienced.

Elias wondered just how far Roman lived from his place when he arrived five to ten minutes after texting. Had he gotten there that fast before? He couldn't remember.

"Um, hi," Roman said when Elias opened the front door. He held up a bottle of wine. "Marco wouldn't let me leave without this. Even though I reminded him you have a child."

Elias couldn't help but let out a soft laugh, opening the door wider to let him in. "I'll save it for a special occasion, then," he replied, taking it from him and leading him into the kitchen.

"Uh, where is... she?" Roman asked hesitantly, leaning against the counter, watching as Elias slid the bottle into a cupboard. "Is she at a friend's house again?"

Elias shook his head, facing him with a tired smile. "No, actually... She's avoiding me."

Roman blinked, surprised. "Oh. Is – Is that why...? Are you not sick?"

"No, I'm not," Elias said, taking a seat. Roman joined him, folding his arms on top of the surface. "Just... feeling like shit, I guess."

Roman frowned. "What happened? Is that why you've been looking so...?"

"What, depressed?"

"Uh, well — no?"

"It's okay. Admit it," Elias mused. He ran a hand through his hair, closing his eyes for a brief moment. "Sorry. We've never had a falling out like this before. We've argued, but we made up after like, a few hours. It's been three days since she last smiled at me."

"Oh, I'm sorry..."

"Don't be. It's my fault," Elias mumbled, looking at him, heart momentarily flipping in his chest. Why was he looking at him like that? Like he was... Elias wasn't sure. But it wasn't normal.

Roman tilted his head. Elias cleared his throat and said, "Sorry. I don't know what's too much to say."

"Nothing is. I'm here for you, remember?"

"I...I'm not — " Elias stopped. Everything sounded so much worse when he tried to say it out loud. He let out a bitter laugh. "God, I can't even say it. I'm sorry. You came all the way here and I can't even tell you — "

"I'm guessing you've been keeping it in for a long time," Roman stated quietly, causing Elias to stop and stare. "It must be for a reason, right? Does it hurt? To think about?"

Elias clenched his jaw tightly, nodding, covering his eyes with his hand. Hearing that brought on an intense urge to cry. He didn't want to cry in front of Roman. It would be embarrassing. And he didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

"I've never told anyone," Elias whispered, cringing at the way his voice wavered. The lump in his throat was becoming painful. It hurt to swallow. "N-No one knows except for me, and — "

"Elias," Roman said, voice so fucking gentle that it made him want to cry even more than before. "Do you — is it okay if I hug you? Is that alright?"

"I — yes. Please."

Roman got up and came around, gently taking Elias' arms and wrapping them around his waist. He could've crumbled right then and there when Roman brought his head to his stomach, one hand cupping the base of his neck and the other gently pressing against his back.

Elias had never felt so safe before.

He clutched the back of his shirt, fisting the fabric in his fingers. Roman smelled like fresh detergent and the faintest hint of the ocean. He pressed against him, seeking comfort in his entire being. He really, really wanted to cry. But he was trying his hardest not to.

He hated crying. He didn't want to.

"You can cry if you want," Roman said, as if he read his mind. "No one can see you."

"I can't."

"You don't have to if you don't want to," Roman replied, sliding his fingers through the hair near the nape of his neck. "But just know it's okay if you do."

Elias inhaled shakily, wincing when he had to sniffle. "It just... it hurts so bad to think about," Elias whispered into his stomach. "I-I thought I'd be better at talking about it after all these years, but I'm not. I can't even say her name without being in pain."

"I'm so sorry," Roman whispered, thumb running back and forth against his neck. "I can only imagine. You don't have to talk about anything until you're ready."

"But I need to tell her," Elias murmured. "Mars deserves to know. I just — I don't know how."

"We don't know how to do a lot of things. Sometimes we just have to wing it," Roman told him. "You just have to do it once, and it'll become easier. Do you think... telling me first? Would make it easier to tell her?"

"Maybe. I don't know."

"What if I guessed? And you gave me yes or no answers?"

Elias sniffled. "I-I think I could do that."

"Okay." Roman carefully pulled away and dragged a chair closer so he could sit in front of him. Elias glanced at him, wiping at his eyes, checking to see if he had cried at all without realizing it. He hadn't. "Is this about who Mars' mom is? Or where she is?"

"...Yeah." He guessed that pretty fast.

"Okay," Roman said slowly, leaning his cheek against his palm. "Was she adopted?"

"Kind of, yeah."

"So, is she related to you? Or not?"

"She is."

Roman blinked. Elias furrowed his brows. "Sorry," Roman said. "I'm just... thinking. Um, are you her father?"

"N-Not... Not biologically, no."

"Right, right, I should've gotten that from the adopted thing," Roman mumbled. "Uh, so, does she belong to someone in your family?"

"Yeah..."

"A sister?"

Elias swallowed, nodding. "I'm guessing she either didn't want her, couldn't keep her, or she... She isn't, um, alive. Is it one, two, or three? Or neither, somehow?"

"Three," Elias choked out. Roman's eyes softened, and he wordlessly pulled Elias into another hug. It was a weird position, leaning over just to tilt into his embrace. But he didn't care. He just liked the feeling regardless.

"I'm so sorry," Roman whispered against his shoulder. "I'm guessing you were close?"

Elias nodded silently. "I won't ask anymore," Roman told him, rubbing his back, his touch so warm and gentle that Elias could've fallen asleep right then and there. It would've been so easy. "You don't have to say anything else. I'm sorry for making you think about it again."

"Don't apologize," Elias murmured, closing his eyes. "You did nothing wrong. I'm glad you're here. And thank you... for getting me to talk about it. Even if it was like that."

Elias stayed there for a little while, pressed against Roman's chest. He eventually noticed the rapid thumping underneath his ear, and he pulled away, looking up at Roman with a small, amused smile.

"Your heart is beating really fast."

Roman's eyes widened. "Uh, no — my heart always beats really fast."

"I don't think that's healthy."

"Well, it does, and I'm fine," Roman insisted, looking away, unable to hide the red tinge to his cheeks. Elias decided not to comment on that.

Elias ran his eyes over Roman's face, tilting his head. "You're so — "

"Dad...?"

He straightened and looked toward the entrance to the kitchen, finding Mars standing there, hiding halfway behind the wall. His stomach twisted. "What is it?"

She nervously glanced at Roman, who had lowered his head, maybe to avoid awkwardness on both sides. "Can... Can you come here?" she asked, gesturing toward the entryway. Elias nodded, touching Roman's shoulder briefly before following her out.

"What's wrong, Mars?" He resisted the urge to reach out and pat her head. He didn't want to see her flinch away like the last time he tried to do so.

She shifted awkwardly in place. "I think... um," she hesitated, looking embarrassed. "I think I... started my, uh... I don't know what to do. I-I know you've talked to me about it, but I forgot. And — " She made a noise of frustration.

He faltered for a second. That wasn't what he was expecting to hear. "There's pads under the — "

"Stop talking so loud!" she complained, waving her hands in front of his face.

"Mars, it's nothing to be ashamed of."

"Just stop," she whined. "I don't know what to do."

"Okay, okay, come here." He guided her to the bathroom and crouched down, opening up the cabinets. He pulled out a pack he'd gotten a long time ago when she reached the age most girls started their cycles. "They're very easy to use. I promise."

She groaned. "This is so weird."

"Why is it weird?"

"It just is!"

He sighed and stood up, handing one to her. "I'll leave you be. Call me if you need help, okay? I'll stand out here. The sticky part goes on — "

"Okay!" she yelped, shoving him toward the door. Elias left and shut it behind him, leaning against the wall, exhaling quietly. It wasn't the most ideal way to talk to her, but at least they were talking.

He desperately hoped she wouldn't go right back to ignoring him after this.

It took a couple minutes, but she eventually came back out once the sound of the faucet running stopped. She stopped in front of him with a deep frown. "It's uncomfortable," she grumbled. Elias cracked a small smile. "And my stomach hurts."

"Do you need some medicine?" he asked. "How badly does it hurt?"

"It doesn't hurt really bad... But it's still uncomfortable."

"Tell me when or if you want anything to take," he told her, hesitantly reaching out, then gently laying his hand on top of her head. She didn't move, so he swiped her hair back, tucking it behind her ears. "Don't be afraid to ask me for anything. Okay?"

"Okay. Also, um..." She trailed off, fiddling with her fingers. "Were you... were you crying? Earlier?"

Elias paused, lips parted. He clenched his jaw for a second. "No, I wasn't."

"Are you lying again?"

He flinched. "I really wasn't crying. I don't lie to you, Mars. I never have."

"Then what about — "

"I wasn't lying then, either," Elias said, crouching down in front of her. He gently squeezed her arms, trying to catch her gaze. "It really is a difficult thing for me to talk about. It's complicated. Are you alright with complicated?"

"Yeah... I just wanna know."

He inhaled deeply. "Okay. We can talk about it."

"Really?"

"Really."