It was safe to say that when Crowley was miserable, the entirety of his asylum was miserable too. It was kind of hard not to be, what with their King in such a temperamental mood that they were all having to constantly walk on eggshells anytime they were around him, out of fear that if they even so much as looked at him wrong, then he may very well snap them out of existence.

That had happened twice already, and it was horrifying to say the least. The poor souls, or lack of souls rather, hadn't even done anything bad in order to deserve to meet such a sudden end. One of them had simply corrected Crowley during the first morning meeting after his break up and alas, she ended up in a puff of black smoke.

As for the second one, he did something even less worthy of an execution in that all he'd done was accidentally bump into Crowley in the hallway, and he too ended up as a pile of dust on the asylum floor. So to say that the King was feeling fragile lately, well, that was one hell of an understatement — pun fully intended.

In fact, Crowley wasn't just fragile and temperamental, he was downright depressed. And everyone knew why. He'd made sure that news of his split with Selina made its way swiftly around the asylum in order to assure her safety completely, so it was no surprise that he fell into this mood so quickly after. And by quickly, they meant immediately. He hadn't even allowed time for the rumour to spread fully, let alone make an impact before he allowed himself to fall so low.

Guess he really did love her, as honestly, most of his demons thought she was nothing more than a toy he used for his own pleasure.

To be honest, the majority of Crowley's demons couldn't care less about who he was seeing. Or if he truly loved them. They all knew he'd been injected with human blood so it wasn't overly surprising to have heard rumours about his brief love affair with Selina Winchester. Of course, they were surprised to hear it was Selina Winchester who'd stolen his newly working heart but truthfully, as long as Crowley was happy, then they were happy — because at least then they didn't have to live in fear like they were doing now.

However, those who were against Crowley and Selina getting their happily ever after, were thrilled to hear the news of their break up. Of course they were. After all, it was what they'd strived for in attempting to take Selina out so you could see how that would be cause for celebration. For a while anyway. After about three or four days their moods started to wither away with how down and mopey Crowley was all the time.

It's not that they particularly cared whether or not he was happy, as they were part of the handful of demons who didn't particularly like Crowley himself — yet still feared him as he was the most powerful after all and honestly, Hell was running better than ever under his rule. It was more the fact that instead of focusing his attention back onto his job and making sure Hell continued to run smoothly, like they'd wanted, Crowley was doing... literally nothing.

Like for real, he was doing nothing. Except for sitting on his throne all day every day. Sulking to himself and watching as life carried on around him. Thank God for Guthrie, as without him, Hell might very well have fallen apart with Crowley's long-lasting spat of depression, and chances are he wouldn't have cared.

He could barely even manage to do the basic necessities of his role as King — like signing things here and there. And even when he did manage to do that, he'd sigh deeply as though it were a big deal, which to him it was, and that's exactly why he didn't do it quietly. He'd sit there and curse at whoever was unlucky enough to have been picked to bother him.

But hey, at least he didn't kill them. Yet.

When it came to Crowley's mood no one was safe, and even Guthrie, his most loyal and trusted follower, was reluctant to go near him. But if there ever was someone who'd be safe from, what those in the asylum were calling, the Curse of the Black Smoke, it would be him, so most of the time he took it upon himself to approach Crowley when needed. And do nothing but pray that he wouldn't push him too far.

"Sir, these require your signature," Guthrie said hesitantly, nervously, approaching Crowley with extreme trepidation as these days, even getting too close could be considered an executable crime. He then raised his hand, extending it in the King's direction and watching as his empty, yet deeply saddened, eyes fell to the forms, where he did nothing but sigh and hold out his hand.

"Haven't you learned how to forge my signature by now?" Crowley muttered, sarcastically obviously, as forging the King of Hell's signature was considered an unspeakable crime, one which even Guthrie wouldn't be pardoned from.

Lazily, Crowley took the clipboard and scribbled his signature across the parchment, the red ink trailing messily over the line as he couldn't be bothered to make sure it was neat. Or readable. The scrawly writing could have said literally anything other than his name so it was just as well this was Hell related, as had there not been a little spark of demonic magic involved then the document would be considered completely invalid.

Not that Crowley would care anyway. Business was the last thing on his mind right now, and he couldn't wait for the 'work day' to be officially over so that he could go to his room and sulk in peace. He was sick of his demons constantly floating around him and yammering on about one thing or another. It was driving him crazy and if there was one thing he didn't need right now, it was to go completely crazy.

He was bad enough with how he felt already. Empty. Numb, yet at the same time overwhelmed with such intense heartache it was as though there was a tiny anchor hanging off his heart, swaying from side to side with each lonely beat that only reminded him of what he was missing. Of the only thing he'd had that was worth living for, and sometimes he found himself wondering whether or not it was worth carrying on without it.

Without her, he should say.

Selina was his entire heart and soul. His entire world and he'd been stupid enough to let her go so really, what was he even still doing walking around and breathing? Other than being utterly miserable all day and having to go about without the other half of him. He'd give anything to have Selina by his side again. To have her rule alongside him — if she wished to that is, as he knew well that she hated all things Hell related with a passion.

Except him, that is. He was the only Hell related being she ever loved and he'd gone and thrown it away like it was garbage. Like it was nothing to him, when in reality it was more than he ever deserved.

Perhaps, had things ended differently between them, then it wouldn't feel as bad as it did. Perhaps, if they ended things amicably then Crowley wouldn't feel as though there was a vast black hole right where his heart should be. Perhaps, had he simply told Selina the truth rather than lead her to believe he never loved her in the first place, then maybe, just maybe, he wouldn't feel so overcome with guilt that he just couldn't bring himself to stay away from her.

Crowley knew he shouldn't be doing this. He knew it was risky, and cruel should she find out he had, but he just needed to know that Selina was okay. That she wasn't rotting away, depressed, in her bedroom as he was in his. He couldn't bring himself to think of anything other than her and if he didn't find out how she was dealing with the break-up, then it may very well kill him.

He'd already tried multiple times to get Castiel to give him some sort of an update on Selina, but each and every time the angel had left him on read. Or worse, sent him straight to voicemail. Crowley was growing inherently tired of hearing Cas tell him to make his voice a mail and so, as the day came to a close, he'd decided that enough was enough.

It was time to take matters into his own hands and if that meant popping into Selina's room, whilst under the cloak of his invisibility, just to see how she was doing, then so be it.

Although, the very instant in which he appeared in the room he was immediately overcome with the crushing weight of regret. He should have stayed at home. He should have never come here as the second his eyes landed on Selina, it was as though an angel blade had sliced right through his heart, and then chopped it up just for good measure. Regardless, he crept quietly forward, never once allowing his gaze to drift from her as part of him felt as though he had to see it. As though he had to see what he'd done to her in order to properly suffer for it.

It was only fair as clearly, by her red-rimmed eyes and tear-stained face Selina herself was suffering. And perhaps even more so than he was as the closer he got to her, the more worse for wear she began to look.

The circles beneath her eyes were so incredibly dark, like she hadn't slept more than an hour or two a night and chances are she hadn't. But Crowley brushed that thought aside. Seeing her like this was punishment enough, he didn't need to be stuck with the mental image of her laying awake all night and crying over him.

Otherwise, he may crumble to the point of no return.

Taking another step forward, to where his knees brushed against the edge of her bed, Crowley reached out his hand, ghosting his fingertips along the length of her arm that lay strewn at her side and wishing that somehow he could touch her properly. That he could sit down beside her, wipe away her tears then bring her into his arms and tell her it was all going to be okay. Because it would be. It had to be. He had to believe that it would otherwise he might not ever be able to keep up this charade.

It was already hard enough not to show himself and apologise to her right here and now, so he didn't even want to think about the guilt he'd feel if she never recovered from this. If that happened, he'd either have to risk her life by telling her truth and taking her back, or worse... He'd have to kill himself, because then there'd be less risk to her, and maybe she'd have a better chance of moving on without him.

"Crowley?" The sudden sound of Selina's empty, yet soft voice caused Crowley's eyes to refocus, only to find that she was now staring directly up at him, her brow deeply furrowed and her lip trembling so much it might have fallen off. "Is that... Is that really you? Are you really here?"

"I'm here," Crowley whispered, against his better judgement as this was by far the worst possible thing that could have happened. She wasn't meant to know he was here checking in on her, let alone have seen him.

Hell, she wasn't even meant to be able to see him under the cloak of his invisibility but it was just his luck that she could. Honestly, it was no surprise and really, Crowley should have known better than to rely on his silly parlour tricks around her.

Of course, she'd be able to see him. Why wouldn't she? Not only were they still connected from the trials but Selina literally owned his heart. She was his heart. The one and only person who ever would be. Who he'd ever fully open up to. Ever fully trust. So it shouldn't have come as a shock to find out his tricks wouldn't work on her. And even if they had, say they weren't as connected or as in love as he thought they were, the chance that she'd be able to see him was still incredibly high.

After all, she was still wearing the necklace he'd given her. The one that allowed him access to the bunker in the first place. That had saved her life when his hound attacked her. That was a small, yet large representation of the love he felt for her. One that Crowley himself had carefully made — out of his very own essence which had been excruciating to extract from his vessel. Even just that small amount he'd used had hurt worse than any torture ever could have, but in the end it had been completely and utterly worth it just to have seen the look on Selina's face when he gave it to her.

He'd never be able to forget her smile that day and if only he'd been able to see her face when he told her the truth behind its meaning. Rather than having to see her now. Broken. Drained of all colour, and still staring mindlessly up at him as though he were a mirage.

"I'm here, darling," Crowley said again, doing his very best to swallow down the thick lump that so eagerly wanted to escape from his throat. He watched as Selina lifted herself up onto her knees and raised her shaking hand, inching it slowly towards him like she was scared to touch him should he hurt her by throwing it back at her again.

Eventually though, her trembling hand landed aside his face and she smiled, shattering Crowley's entire being with it as even despite what he'd done to her, she was still as happy to see him as ever. Just as he was her. And before he knew it — before he could stop it, Selina had thrown herself hard against him, hugging him with all her might and white-knuckling the back of his coat out of fear he'd vanish into a puff of smoke, having been nothing but a cruel, sleep deprivation induced hallucination.

Even with his mind telling him not to, Crowley's own arms wrapped tightly around her small frame, feeling as her body shook beneath him and he knew she was more than likely still crying. She'd probably never stopped from the moment he left her, and so he told his mind to shut up. He'd figure out a reason, or an excuse for this later, but for now...

For now, all he wanted to do was hold her.

Trailing his hand slowly up her back, Crowley made his way towards her hair, knowing if there was one thing he could do to help ease her pain a little, it was stroke her hair. She always liked when he'd do that, and most of the time she didn't even have to ask him to either. He'd come to know by now that she always wanted it when they hugged and so he placed his hand gently on the back of her head, beginning to comfortingly stroke her soft locks as though nothing had changed.

And for a moment it hadn't.

For a moment, as Crowley heard those soft hums of hers leave Selina's lips and felt the steady beat of her heart against his all was right in the world.

Until it wasn't.

"I'm dreaming, aren't I?" Selina said sadly, her voice breaking with every word that left her lips. She pulled back a touch, just enough to look Crowley in the eyes and when she saw they were glistening. Slowly layering with tears as the seconds ticked by, she knew her assumption was correct.

She had to be dreaming as the real Crowley? The one she loved more than anything? The one who'd so easily whittled her down into nothing more than an empty shell of her former self? He'd never cry over her. Not truthfully anyway, so it was pretty easy for her to believe that this was all in her head.

"You're not really here," Selina shook her head, before tilting her face towards her shoulder which she used to wipe at the tears that fell from her eyes. "You're not real... I'm dreaming."

"You're dreaming," Crowley replied, despite everything in him telling him not to. He wanted desperately to tell her he was really here, but he knew that would only end with a second heartbreak when he had to leave her all over again.

Therefore, it was for the best that, for the time being, Selina thought she was dreaming.

Leaning in, Selina took a second to simply look him in the eyes, seeing the love she once thought she saw hidden deep behind them staring back at her. It was strange, how it all felt so real. The touch of his skin. The warmth of his body. Even the way in which he smelled made her feel like she was back in the real world. Back in the arms of the real Crowley, who she'd give anything to have look at her like this again — with so much love. So much adoration that she thought she might drown in it.

Little did Selina know, of course, that she was very much in the real world. But as badly as Crowley wanted her to believe that, it was probably for the best that she didn't. If she did, there was the chance she might tell him to go and now that he was here, he didn't think he'd ever be able to bring himself to leave again. Not until he'd got her to have a few full hours of sleep at least, as by the slight way in which she swayed in his arms, he could tell she was running on fumes.

"Lie back down, darling," Crowley said softly, brushing a few damp strands of Selina's hair back from her face, as they'd gotten stuck to her cheeks with the amount of tears she had shed.

He wanted to try and get her back into bed without giving her any indication that this was real. Or before she came up with her own way to spend the night as given that she thought she was dreaming, there was a slight chance Selina might have wanted more than to have him hold her. Crowley didn't even want to kiss her given that thought, let alone do anything else. It wouldn't feel right. It wouldn't be right to take advantage of her when she was so vulnerable and easily manipulated.

To be completely honest, Crowley wasn't even thinking of anything like that right now anyway. All he truly wanted was for Selina to get some sleep and if he could lie next to her whilst she did, allowing him to feel the way she'd nuzzle her face against his chest and tangle her legs together with his, then he'd take it. It was more than he could ever hope for and at least this way, he wouldn't spend all night drowning in his feelings and Selina wouldn't be left to cry herself to sleep for yet another lonely night.

"Will you hold me?" Selina whispered, her shyness pulling on Crowley's heartstrings furiously. She glanced up at him, chewing absently at the skin on her lip and when he lifted his hand, drawing his thumb down her lips to stop her from biting them, he smiled.

It was a small smile. A strange smile, honestly, as she would have thought that in her dreams he'd smile properly. That he'd smile like he always did when she was around. Nevertheless, it was a smile. One capable of bringing her more relief than she ever could have asked for, and when he leaned in, placing the softest, most gentle kiss against her forehead Selina almost melted against him.

Too bad it wasn't real, she thought to herself, but hey, at least her dream self could be happy even if she wasn't.

"I'll always hold you, my love," Crowley said softly, allowing his breath to puff out across Selina's skin, sending a small shiver down her spine before she slowly started to lower herself back onto the bed.

Rounding it swiftly, Crowley freed himself of his coat, shoes and jacket before climbing in beside her, feeling his stomach start to churn when she attached herself next to him the very second the mattress sunk beneath his weight. If he had known that the last time they were together like this would have been the last time then he'd have treasured it more. He knew he'd have to leave her again soon, before she woke up and found out he was really here, but at least for now he got to experience what it felt like to have her next to him one more time.

One last time, he should say as he knew he couldn't do this again. Not only was it not fair on him, but it wasn't fair on Selina. He couldn't keep allowing her to think that she was dreaming about him. That she was dreaming about a version of him that he wished he could be for her and would give anything in order to be. It wasn't right, and quite frankly it was cruel to keep her in this fantasy world when he should be allowing her to focus on trying to pick herself back up.

But until the clock signalled that it was time for him to go, this is where Crowley would remain. By Selina's side. Holding her tightly. Soothingly, in every way in which he could think of to help her sleep until the early hours of the morning crept up on them and he knew he truly had to leave.

Prying himself out of Selina's tight hold and tearing himself away from her was painful, but he managed. Truthfully, it hurt like hell, but eventually he dragged himself out of the bed and began to make sure he hadn't left anything lying around that might hint towards the fact that he was really here. Once he was sure he was in the clear, Crowley leaned down, pressing one last lingering kiss to Selina's forehead before disappearing — this time, for what he hoped, was for good.

As though sensing his absence, Selina began to stir in her sleep and with her eyes still closed, she threw out her arm, expecting, and hoping for it to land atop a sleeping Crowley's chest. Only, when it was met with nothing but the firm mattress in which he'd once occupied, she quickly remembered that he had been nothing more than a figment of her very own mind.

Of course he had. He wouldn't come to her. He wouldn't care if she was suffering. If she was broken. Hell, he'd probably find great joy in knowing that she was. In knowing that she wasn't able to sleep without him beside her and yet regardless of that, she was still overcome with immense disappointment to know that none of it was real.

But at least it felt real.

Real enough that she'd managed to get a full night's sleep for the first time since Crowley had left her. She didn't think that would ever be possible as even with help from Castiel, she hadn't been able to close her eyes for longer than an hour or two before she ended up drowning in heartbreak.

In fact, the 'dream' had done Selina a world of good that when she reluctantly climbed out of bed, she actually felt a little more energised than normal — which was just as well as now that she was awake and riddled with the angst of knowing she'd never have the real Crowley by her side again, she found herself in desperate need of distraction. And by distraction, she meant a project.

Selina needed to find herself a project, and fast. Something she could do. Something that would keep her occupied long, and hard enough that she wouldn't fall back into the pit of despair. She was already getting to be a frequent flyer down there and honestly, it was growing to be mentally exhausting for her and if she didn't find something to focus her attention on, and quickly, it might very well kill her.

Only, off the top of her head, Selina couldn't think of anything she had left to do inside the bunker she called home. She'd already done most of it, back when Henry died, and anything she had left to do, she didn't really want to risk doing — not right now anyway.

All she had left to do was mostly going through inventory and checking out any ancient artefacts the Men of Letters had stored away within the walls, but given what happened last time she'd gone snooping, Selina wasn't too keen to jump back into that job. Especially considering the mood she was in as chances are, she'd end up releasing another Wicked Witch and she could really do without losing someone else she loved.

Losing Crowley was already hard enough on her, and she was barely surviving that but if she lost anyone else. If she caused anyone else to die, then she might just surrender herself to Death willingly, save herself the pain of having to go through it all over again. Therefore, she had to find something to do that wouldn't be too much of a risk to those who were living with her.

Only, given her clouded mental state and the desperation she had to think of anything other than Crowley, Selina probably picked the worst, most dangerous, project to undertake. And those in the bunker, wholeheartedly agreed.

"What the hell are you doing with that?" Dean demanded, launching himself up the library steps in one large jump as he could believe what he was seeing.

"What does it look like? I'm making sure it's secure," Selina said plainly, and innocently as though she weren't fiddling with a box that contained the head, and essence, of a Knight of Hell.

"You're making sure it's secure?" Dean repeated, dumbfounded to say the least as he never thought Selina would be this reckless. Heartbroken or not. "Are you crazy? Cat, there's a Knight of Hell in there, and if she gets out..."

"She won't get out," Selina interrupted, refusing to acknowledge that possibility and remaining sure of herself that everything would be fine. "I'm not even opening the box, and even if I did, she has a devil's trap carved into her forehead."

"Who has a devil's trap carved into their forehead?" Sam asked casually as he entered the room, oblivious as to what was going on and honestly, he was just happy to see that Selina was finally out of bed.

"Abaddon," Dean said bluntly, and Sam's face dropped instantly. "Who might end up taking us all out if little sis here doesn't put her back where she got her from."

"Cat?" Sam said questionably, walking slowly up the stairs as opposed to the speed Dean used. He had no idea what the hell Selina was planning, and honestly, he was worried that her break up with her mystery man had finally driven her to the brink of suicide. "Cat, what are you doing with her?"

"I'm trying to make sure she can't get out," Selina sighed, tossing some tools aside as they'd been useless in carving into the iron box that housed Abaddon's head. She placed her hands on her hips, chewing at her lip and staring at the box in thought before suddenly, lightbulb . "Where's the blow torch?"

"Oh no you don't," Dean said seriously, lurching forward to take hold of Selina's arm in case she decided to venture off in search of things she could use to 'not break open the magic box'. "You're not putting the blow torch anywhere near that box."

"Why?" Selina said a little angrily, roughly pulling her arm free from Dean's hold. "I'm the one who built it, I should be able to make alterations whenever I want to."

"Alterations?" Dean repeated, wide-eyed, "It's not a dress, Selina, it's a curse box. One that should be encased in six feet of concrete."

"Yeah. About that," Selina drew out, chewing nervously at the skin around her nails, "I wouldn't go in that room if I were you... It's messy."

And just like that, Dean's face fell as he finally noticed how sweaty and grime-y Selina looked. She had smears of grey all across her face, not to mention a few cuts and bruises littering her hands and arms. No doubt he'd find a sledgehammer, a pick axe, and a bunch of other tools scattered about the empty room that once housed Abaddon's head, and now he was really regretting going out to grab breakfast at the diner.

"Selina," Dean said sternly, crossing his arms and feeling as though he was about to have to scold her.

"What, Dean?" Selina sighed frustratedly before he could, "What do you think I'm going to do, huh? Release her? Sell her to the highest bidder? Or do you really think I'd stoop so low as to use Abaddon as my own personal suicide pill?"

"What? No. No, I don't think that," Dean replied defensively, despite both him and Sam thinking exactly that.

"Selina, it's not Abbadon we're worried about. It's you." Sam said softly as he stepped forward, reaching out to wipe a particularly dark patch of dust off the side of Selina's head before his hand settled aside her face. "We're worried that you're going to do something reckless and get yourself hurt."

"I'm already hurt, Sam," Selina whispered, her voice having fallen back to being broken and empty. "What more could she do to me that I don't feel already?"

Within seconds of those heartbreaking words leaving Selina's lips, Sam pulled her into his arms, uncaring about whether or not she was filthy as just hearing that tone of voice coming from her was enough to make him forget all about that. He lifted his hand, placing it on the back of her head and covering the entirety of it with just his palm as he began to gently stroke her hair, hoping to offer her a little comfort during her hard times as it was as much as he'd been able to do since the night she came home in tears — as she'd done nothing but lock herself away in her room since then.

However, Sam was no miracle worker. And he was no Crowley either, therefore there was simply nothing he could do to help ease the overwhelming pain in which Selina felt. But that didn't mean he couldn't help distract her, and once she'd finally pulled away from him and settled herself a little, Sam himself, along with Dean, got to work in helping Selina assure that Abaddon would never see the light of day again.

They scoured the entire library, looking for anything they could find on Knights of Hell, and how to deal with them. Yet no matter how many books they skimmed through. Or how many of Kevin's scrawly demon-tablet translations they shuffled through, there was simply nothing. Not even a single word relating to the Knights of Hell were amongst the knowledge they owned and honestly, Selina was starting to feel a little deflated.

That was, until Sam found a little something that might be exactly what they were looking for.

"Check this out," He called out, straightening from where he'd been crouched over and digging in a filing cabinet. "It's a file on some guy named... Wow, tough name, Cuthbert Sinclair."

"Wait," Selina perked up, lifting herself from where she'd been slouched in her chair. "Cuthbert Sinclair... I know that name. I think... Yeah, I think I've driven his car before."

"Who is he?" Dean asked curiously.

"Looks like he designed most of the warding that keeps the bunker safe," Sam explained, slowly making his way towards the paper covered table as he flicked through the files. "It says here that he was named Master of Spells right after he initiated, but I guess his work got a little crazy after that."

"What makes you say that?" Selina asked, rounding the table to peek over Sam's giant shoulder in attempts to read the file for herself.

"The leadership called it eccentric and irresponsible." Sam read aloud. "There are projects here that he proposed the last two years he was here and look at his..." He lowered the file a little, scanning his finger over the writing on the paper. "Rejected. Rejected. Rejected."

"Wait, look there," Selina reached over, pointing to a small notice in the top right corner and reading out loud, "Cuthbert Sinclair, formal separation from the Men of Letters, April 1956."

"1956? That means..."

"He missed the massacre," Sam finished for Dean, huffing out a chuckle as they might have just found the answer to what they'd been searching for as who better than an expert spellcaster to help make sure Abaddon never breathed fresh air again.

"Does it say where we can find him?" Selina asked hopefully, suddenly wishing she'd asked Henry more questions about his time with the Men of Letters as maybe he might have known this Cuthbert guy.

"No, unfortunately," Sam said around a sign, flicking through the pages again just to be sure. "Looks like we might have to cast a spell of our own to try and find out where he is. Or if he's even still alive."

"I think I might know someone who can help us," Dean said hesitantly, as he wasn't thrilled about who he was thinking about.

"Who?" Sam and Selina asked in unison.

"Crowley," Dean replied, unamused and thankfully he'd glanced away from his siblings and was unable to see the way in which Selina's face dropped. He made his way towards the tray of liquor, pouring himself a morning glass before continuing, "Remember how many times he talked about trying to get in here? Chances are he might know that someone got out, and so... maybe he knows where we can find him."

"It's worth a try, I guess," Sam shrugged, closing the file and tossing it on the table before he focused his attention towards Selina, who was trying her absolute best not to crumble in front of them. "Cat, you wanna give him a call?"

"No," Selina said bluntly, turning herself away from her brothers should she start tearing up, and instead she began to sift through the discarded notes for other means of finding Cuthbert — whilst at the same time shooing Kit away from trying to eat the paper.

"No?" Dean repeated, his eyes narrowed as he edged his way towards her. "What do you mean no?"

"I mean no. You wanna hear it in Spanish too?" Selina snapped, a little harsher than she would have normally meant to as she turned to him, her eyebrow raised as she watched Dean do nothing but frown at her before taking a long sip of scotch.

"Cat, why don't you want to call Crowley?" Sam asked, a little suspiciously he might add as usually, Selina would be fighting to call Crowley if it saved them time and effort.

"Because I don't want to," Selina said plainly, tossing some pages back onto the table as they had nothing to do with what they were talking about. "Okay? I don't want to call... him..."

She couldn't even bring herself to say Crowley's name, it hurt so much.

"So just drop it already," she finished, sighing in frustration once again as she didn't have it in her to fight with her brothers. But she especially didn't have it in her to see Crowley again, not after her dream last night and not when she was feeling so incredibly fragile. Therefore, she turned on her heels, making her way towards the library steps to go search the store rooms for some sort of spell they could use to find Cuthbert. "And don't call him whilst I'm gone either."

"We won't," Sam and Dean said in unison, the former eyeing her suspiciously whilst the latter simply sighed in annoyance, then sipped his scotch.

Only, once Selina was out of earshot, Dean set his now empty glass aside and pulled out his phone, "Screw this, I'm calling Crowley."

"Dean..." Sam went to carry on, to warn him that it might not be the best idea but before he could so much as utter another word, Dean held up one finger to silence him, then started to talk.

"Crowley," Dean said, a little more cheerfully than Sam would have expected. But that's usually how it goes when he's trying to get something so honestly, it wasn't a surprise. "Listen, we need your help with something. Something Abaddon related... Uh-huh... No she's not out, but she might be if we can't fix this curse box Cat made for her."

At that, Dean raised his eyebrows towards Sam, as if to say don't look at me like that, lying works — as there was nothing wrong with Selina's curse box, she just wanted to make it stronger. However, if they wanted Crowley's help, they had to bend the truth and make it seem a little more serious than it truly was.

"We're looking for someone," Dean carried on, "A guy who was expelled from the Men of Letters just before the massacre and were wondering if maybe you knew where he might be...? Uh-huh... Yeah... Uh, no. No, Selina isn't here. She's with Cas, visiting, uh... Garth."

"Garth?" Sam said questionably, to which Dean simply shrugged. He may have panicked a little there, but in his defence he wasn't expecting Crowley to ask whether or not Selina was there. And by his tone, it was sort of like he was hoping she wasn't, hence the lie.

"Yeah, Garth," Dean went along with it, praying Crowley would believe him and thankfully, it seemed as though he did as before Dean could even hang up the phone, that signature black suit of his appeared directly in front of him.

And yes, it scared the crap out of him. Again.

"God, would it kill you to knock?" Dean grumbled, hanging up the phone and shoving it annoyingly back into his pocket.

"What do you want?" Crowley asked bluntly, as he was in no mood to play games or be snarky. He just wanted to get this over with.

And quickly, as he didn't believe Dean's story about Selina being gone for a second. Obviously, as she'd been inside the bunker as of a few hours ago when he left her for what he'd been hoping was the last time. But he knew that if he kept saying no then they'd keep annoying him and he really wasn't in the mood to deal with them right now. Or to see Selina strolling sadly around the bunker in her Oodie, so he could only pray that what they wanted was fairly easy for him to give them.

"We're looking for this guy," Sam told him, momentarily scanning the table for Cuthbert's file before quickly handing it to Crowley. "We thought maybe you might know where he is."

"Hmm," Crowley mused, reading briefly over the file's contents and feeling a small hint of satisfaction over finally putting a face and name to the one person he had spent a good portion of his life searching for. "You're in luck. As a matter of fact, I do happen to know where Mr Sinclair resides. Roughly anyway, we never could pinpoint his exact location."

That came as a relief to both Dean and Sam, as had Crowley been nothing more than a useless venture, then Selina would have likely been even more pissed to find out they'd called him. Not that she wouldn't be pissed regardless of that, but still, it would be nice to give her a win for once as with what she was going through, she could definitely use one.

Except, little did they know that even with his key piece of information about Cuthbert, Crowley would be nothing if not an extra loss for Selina right now. And when her footsteps began to echo closer towards them, those in the room appeared to freeze almost instantly. Crowley especially, because if he had to see her covered in her own tears and drowning in sorrow again, then he might very well release Abaddon himself just to have her kill him.

"Okay, so I found the spell we used that one time to try and find Kev..." Selina's words trailed off as her eyes rose slowly from the floor she currently walked across, stopping dead as her gaze landed on Crowley, whose own heart began to beat just as hard as hers was.

Only, Selina's heart wasn't beating hard solely because it was broken. Or because seeing Crowley, the real Crowley and not just one whom she'd thought was nothing more than a dream, again didn't crush her very soul and make her feel as though she might have thrown up the measly cup of coffee which was all she'd had for breakfast.

No, it was more because she was so overcome with anger that her brothers would do the exact opposite of what she had told them to, that honestly, Crowley ended up as nothing more than a dark and murky blur in the background.

"Seriously?" Selina said coldly, tossing the spell onto the war room table which was about as far as she'd gotten into the main room before suddenly halting. "Can you guys not oblige by the one fucking thing I asked you not to do?"

"Look, he knows where Cuthbert is," Dean said in defence, of himself of course, as he was solely to blame here.

But Selina didn't seem to care about that fact and honestly, she seemed more livid than ever before and even her nostrils were flaring with how mad she was, which told Dean that perhaps this time, he might have truly fucked up.

"I don't care," Selina exclaimed, not wanting to hear any of their pathetic excuses. "I specifically asked you not to call him... With everything I'm dealing with right now, you couldn't just give me that?"

With the slight hint of a wobble towards the end of her sentence, Selina took it upon herself to leave the room, not wanting to cry in front of her brothers again, let alone cry in front of Crowley. She'd already given him enough in terms of a reaction, she didn't need to give him the added satisfaction of seeing her crumble at the mere sight of him.

"Selina, come on!" Dean called after her, just before she could slip through the archway.

"Forget it Dean," Selina fired back, holding her hand out to silence him. "I'll find Cuthbert myself."

And with that, she was gone.

"What the hell was that all about?" Dean asked, spinning on his heels and casting his glance around those still left in the room, as though looking to them for an answer as he hadn't a clue as to one himself.

"Beats me," Crowley said casually, pretending that that hadn't hurt him terribly. See, this is the exact reason why he didn't want to come here and had he known that Selina had specifically asked that they not call him, then, to spare her the heartache, he simply never would have picked up the phone. "Perhaps she's still mad at me for what happened the other week."

The attack in the store, he means, which would hopefully be reason enough to draw suspicion away from her brothers as to why else Selina might be so mad at him that she couldn't stand to look at him.

"I guess," Dean sighed, running his hand over his stubble-covered chin as he leaned back against the table. Made sense, he thought to himself. Selina had been a little weird after that so chances are Crowley was right. "Let's just give her a while to cool off, then we'll try again."

"You know what," Sam began, scratching absently at his chin as his eyes drifted from the strangely-acting Crowley, to the archway his sister had just stormed through, "You guys start figuring out a plan for Cuthbert. I'm gonna go talk to Selina."

Sam didn't even wait for confirmation from Dean before he headed off in the search of Selina, who he was starting to have his suspicions about as there was something about this whole thing that wasn't making any sense to him. At first he thought maybe Crowley was right, that maybe Selina was still mad at him for almost getting her killed but that just didn't seem very plausible as Selina never appeared to care about getting attacked, regardless of the state she ended up in.

There just had to be more to it than that and if Sam ever wanted to get to the bottom of it then he needed answers. And truthful ones too, which is why he didn't stop searching the bunker until he found Selina. In the dungeon of all places, sitting in the middle of the devil's trap with her knees pulled up to her chest and her head buried between them.

"Selina," Sam said softly, approaching her cautiously until the tip of his toes brushed the outer edge of the devil's trap. But even then, Selina didn't look up at him. Instead, she continued to cry, the only evidence of that being the gentle shaking of her shoulders and her soft sniffles.

Slowly, Sam proceeded to cross the trap, coming to crouch down in front of his sister who was breaking his heart to have to see like this. He reached out his hand, gently placing it on her arm and when she still didn't look up at him, he knew that what he'd been thinking. What he'd been fearing , deep down inside, just had to be true as why else would she not be able to bring herself to look at him if not for this one specific reason?

"Selina," Sam began, pressing his lips together as he wasn't even sure if he'd be able to get the words out. He took a breath, closing his eyes momentarily as he didn't want what he was about to say to be true. But he also didn't want Selina to have to keep suffering in silence and so he finally brought himself to ask, "Selina, is Crowley who you've been sneaking off to see? Is he the one who hurt you?"

At that, Selina's sobs went from silent to partially audible as she nodded her head, before finally lifting it to look Sam in the eye. Although her own eyes were filled with so many tears he was nothing more than a blurry shape, but she could at least make out the softened brow that he sported, which was surprising to say the least as she half-expected him to look at her with disgust.

Until she remembered, he'd slept with a demon too so really, he couldn't hold it against her.

"Please, don't tell Dean," Selina whispered through broken sobs, dropping her face once more as she couldn't take looking at Sam's pity-filled eyes any longer.

"He deserves to know, Cat."

"Please, Sam..." Selina looked back up, desperation written all over her face and riddled in her voice. "Please... He'll kill him."

"I have every right to go out there and kill him myself," Sam replied through partially gritted teeth. How Crowley could ever show up here after what he did was a pretty ballsy move and he should count himself lucky that it was him that had figured things out and not Dean, otherwise Selina would be mourning a lot more than a broken relationship.

"That wouldn't change anything, Sam and you know it," Selina said seriously, feeling a hint of fear in her chest that Sam actually would go out there and kill him. And that she'd have to watch. "I've already lost him... Please don't make me mourn him."

God, when she put it like that, it kind of made Sam want to wrap Crowley up in bubble wrap just to keep him safe as if this was what Selina was like now? With Crowley alive? Then he really wouldn't like to see her if he wasn't.

"How did this even happen?" Sam asked softly, hoping to help ease Selina's worries, even just a small bit. "How did you..."

"Fall in love with the King of Hell?" Selina finished for him, sniffling as she tried her hardest to calm down.

"Well... yeah," Sam exhaled, watching as she wiped her watering eyes, smearing the dirt from earlier across her pale skin even more.

"I don't know," Selina breathed out, wiping her face again. "It just sort of happened... But it doesn't really matter anymore though does it?"

"It matters if you still love him," Sam said plainly, "Do you still love him?"

Selina nodded, her lip trembling terribly as she swallowed, before adding shakily, "More than anything."

Confessing that particular aspect of her love aloud for the first time hurt Selina a lot more than she ever could have prepared for, yet at the same time, she couldn't help but feel a small touch of relief.

"But like I said, it doesn't matter," She shook her head, her voice cracking with every word, "Because he doesn't love me back."

That's where Sam grew a little confused as honestly, now that he knew the truth, the entirety of Crowley's behaviour towards his sister made one hundred percent more sense. How weirdly close they'd gotten. How he couldn't seem to say no to her. How, after Lola, he was so worried that Selina didn't trust him anymore that he actually seemed distressed over it. Not to mention how, after the demon attack, he hadn't wanted to leave her bedside and seemed furious that they'd so much as gone near her, let alone touched her.

Even his behaviour just now seemed to contradict everything Selina had told him about her breakup. Sam had been watching Crowley closely from the minute he showed up, as there had been something about Selina not wanting to call him that had bugged him. And from the moment he arrived, he'd seemed... antsy. Twitchy, as though he were looking over his shoulder and at first it didn't make any sense.

But it did now. It made so much sense. Crowley did love Selina, otherwise he'd have shown up here full of confidence and his usual egotistical self over knowing he broke her. Only he hadn't. He'd been reluctant. Making sure Selina wasn't here, and that didn't exactly strike Sam as the type of behaviour the Crowley he thought he knew would portray, therefore, he had to be in love with Selina.

The only question was, why did he make her think he didn't? And why the hell would he let her go?

"Get up," Sam said, a little bluntly in all honesty and it actually made Selina widen her eyes a little out of surprise, tilting her head to the side as if to say excuse me? "You heard me... You're Selina Winchester. You strike fear into the hearts of monsters everywhere, okay, you're better than this... So get your ass up, and let's go out there and show Crowley that he didn't break you."

"He did break me, Sam," Selina replied, only less sadly than she once might have and instead, more matter of factly. Regardless, she stood up as something told her if she didn't, Sam would have pulled her up himself and she'd like to keep her arms in their sockets, thanks. "And he already knows it."

"Yeah, well he's not gonna break you anymore, alright? So let's go out there, and let's use him to find this Cuthbert Sinclair."

"You know I'm only doing this to distract myself from thinking about Crowley, right?" Selina questioned, in a surprisingly light tone as Sam began to usher her out the door. "Seems kind of pointless to use him, don't you think?"

"Cat, you're my sister and I love you," Sam began, trying his hardest not to smile as he'd missed that playful side of her greatly, "But shut up and get your ass up those stairs."

"Alright, fine," Selina sighed, gripping the handle by the stairs as she readied herself to walk up them and face Crowley again. She knew Sam was right, she was better than this but honestly, she wasn't sure if she'd be able to handle it. At least, not for very long without cracking.

Nevertheless, she climbed the stairs and began to make her way back to the main room of the bunker, detouring to the bathroom on their way there just to clean herself up a little, as Sam had not-so-nicely told her she looked a mess.

Once she made herself a little more presentable, she carried on, her stomach churning with each slow step she took. Until finally, she returned to the entrance to the war room, where just before she walked through, she took a deep breath, put on a brave face and told herself that she could handle this.

Whether or not she could, well, that was still to be determined but regardless she sucked it up, and stepped inside.

"Good, you're back," Dean said gladly, drawing Selina's immediate attention towards himself as she tried her hardest not to look at Crowley. "We doing this or what?"

" I'm doing it," Selina corrected, and Dean narrowed his eyes as she pointed towards both him, and Sam, "You two are staying here."

Was it a good idea to be alone with Crowley? Probably not. But it was an even worse idea to be around both him, and Dean given the circumstances. At least if she were alone, she wouldn't have to pretend... much. So, for the time being, she'd just have to man up and try to act as though every second during which she was breathing wasn't excruciatingly painful.

"You sure about this?" Sam asked quietly, to which Selina nodded her head.

"I'm sure," She whispered back, flashing him an assuring, yet uncertain, smile before stepping closer to the one person she wanted to stay as far away from as she could, yet at the same time wanted to be as close to as humanly possible. She took a deep breath, allowing her eyes to draw slowly up the length of Crowley's body and as soon as they met his own, distant and glazed, her heart clenched tightly in her chest.

This was going to be harder than she thought, but she managed to keep her cool, as did Crowley who could easily tell what had happened with her and Sam. For starters, Selina seemed more relaxed than she had been earlier, whether it was a facade or not he wasn't quite sure but at least she could acknowledge him now. And secondly, Sam was staring at him intensely, as though trying to see into his mind and in all honesty, it was a little unsettling.

"Crowley will take me there, won't you?" Selina asked, although it came out more like an order and she was a little shocked at herself that it had. And that she'd managed to say his name without choking on it. Or bursting into tears.

"Certainly," Crowley replied, seeming outwardly like his usual self when on the inside, it felt like he was dying.

"Good," Selina said in satisfaction, before looking back over her shoulder towards her brothers. "You two can tidy up the mess in the library as punishment... Oh, and feed Kit, he keeps trying to eat Kevin's notes."

With a nod of her brother's heads, Selina smiled once in thanks before turning back to Crowley, who'd never once taken his eyes off her and it only made things that much harder for her to deal with. But of course, that's what he wanted and so she took another deep breath, then moved forward, until she was within about an arms reach of him and it was only then did he speak again.

"You ready?" Crowley asked, watching as Selina momentarily hesitated and glanced over at Sam, who gave her a reassuring, and supportive, head nod in response.

"Let's just get this over with," Selina muttered, her words slicing through Crowley's heart like a knife through butter as she repositioned herself next to him.

Out of instinct, Crowley's immediate response was to take her hand, expecting her to then lean her head against his arm as she once would have. However, before he did, he quickly realised that he couldn't. It wasn't his place to do that anymore, so instead his motion carried upwards until he came to her shoulder, where he hesitated for just a second before allowing his hand to finally settle upon it and feeling how Selina instantly tensed up rather than relax as she once did.

That probably hurt him more to be honest, that in such a short time his touch no longer came as a comfort to her. Little did he know though, Selina was only acting and in reality, that touch was everything to her. She could feel the warmth of it travel across her skin and just as she closed her eyes to savour it, the two of them vanished.

Reappearing alongside a forest, just adjacent to an empty clearing, Crowley glanced to his side almost immediately, still unable to keep his eyes off Selina — even more so now that they were alone. His gaze then fell to his hand, that still lay resting atop her shoulder and he knew he should pull it back now that they were here. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't seem to want to move it.

It was as though he'd gotten a taste for it: the feeling of her. Like he was suddenly unable to keep his hands to himself after what felt like a never-ending two weeks of Hell, as the only thing that ever seemed to bring him comfort was her. And so, against his better judgement, Crowley raised his fingers, lighting brushing a few loose strands of Selina's hair back over her shoulder, barely able to feel the heat of her skin against his fingertips like he once did, but getting just enough to cause his heart to flutter.

God, how he missed that feeling. How he missed her and every single emotion she could ever have made him feel at once. How he missed kissing her. Hugging her. Holding her neck as he gazed into her eyes and feeling the slow beat of her pulse increase as time ticked by, as he always did tend to make her heart beat faster and she was never shy in telling him that.

Crowley would give everything and more just to experience all that again but deep down he knew he never would. He didn't deserve to either, not after what he'd done to her. Not after he'd hurt her so badly that she struggled to even look him in the eye.

Although, to his surprise, as his fingers continued to graze her neck, Selina didn't swat at his hand or shove him roughly away as he might have thought she would. Instead, she closed her eyes again and took a deep breath, like she was basking in the sensation of his touch as over the past two weeks, it's all she had wanted to feel.

Until she remembered. Crowley didn't love her. He wasn't craving her touch as she was his and she was supposed to be showing him that he didn't break her. She was better than this and so she shrugged, releasing her shoulder from beneath his hand and sidestepping until she was more than an arms length away from him. She wouldn't allow him to add to her misery by teasing her with what she could no longer have. No matter how hard it was to stay away from him, or how hard it was not to fall to her knees and beg him to come back to her, she knew had to.

Not just for her dignity, but for her sanity as well.

"Don't," Selina exhaled, her breath shuddering lightly as she softly shook her head, whilst doing everything in her power not to look at him. "Just don't, okay? You already got your revenge, so please... I'm asking you... Don't hurt me anymore."

Selina knew that wasn't very you didn't break me of her, but she didn't care. She needed to set some boundaries otherwise she would shatter completely.

Just as Crowley did right here and now.

Don't hurt me anymore. God, she might as well have just killed him as those words had almost done it for her.

"So," Selina began, clearing her throat and not even giving Crowley a chance to respond — which was just as well, he might have fallen apart had he done so. "This is where you tracked him to?"

"Exact spot," Crowley said quietly, taking an incredibly small step closer to her just to be within the radiance of her presence. "Never could find him though and I'm sensing nothing so if he's here, he's warded up to the gills."

"Well he was a genius at it. Sure as hell ain't gonna be found by a single demon." Selina replied bluntly, coldly, in an attempt to try and make herself hate him.

But spoiler alert, it wasn't working, and if anything, it only made her feel worse.

"I guess so," Crowley murmured, her words once again slicing through his chest like a samurai sword.

Only this time, it wasn't so much her words themselves, more so the tone in which she'd used to speak them. She'd never once called him a demon like that before. Most of the time she'd say it loud and proud and full of love but to hear it said like that? So cold. So empty, So... disgusted? Well, it may have hurt him terribly but honestly, he knew too well that he deserved it.

"Lucky for you, I'm a legacy," Selina said proudly, stepping away from him and clearing her throat before loudly calling out to the air, "Cuthbert Sinclair, my name is Selina Winchester... I'm Henry Winchester's granddaughter and a Woman of Letters... If that's even a thing. But I guess the Men of Letters aren't technically a thing anymore either so it doesn't really matter."

Babbling. Great way to introduce yourself to someone, Selina, real smooth.

"But anyway, I uh, I know what happened to you back in the day and I gotta say, I don't agree with it. You were clearly so ahead of your time and to get to the short of it, that's why I'm here... I need your help and hopefully..."

Selina's words trailed off as a swirl of wispy, grey smoke erupted from thin air in front of her, glowing as it uncurled itself from the cloud to form a perfectly accessible doorway. From that performance alone, Selina knew this was the solution to her problem and so she stepped forwards, timidly reaching out towards the door just to be sure, and once she realised it wasn't about to disintegrate her, she stepped through it.

And not alone either as there was no way in hell, Crowley was letting her wander in there by herself. Legacy or no legacy, he had no idea what this Cuthbert might do to her and he'd be damned if he allowed it to happen on his watch.

The grey, murky darkness lasted a matter of seconds before suddenly, Selina and Crowley found themselves standing in a rather magnificent hallway, with the door no longer in sight and not a single clue as to where they were going. They shared a questioning look — the first proper look since Selina's 'dream', and when Selina cocked her head to the left Crowley nodded briefly, following her cautiously down the length of the hallway whilst making sure to remain within reaching distance should he need to grab her and teleport her to safety.

For a second there everything felt like it once did. As though the two of them were simply exploring an empty mansion in a distant country while it's owners were out of town, gazing wondrously at their collection of famous paintings and antique weapons — whilst at the same time looking for the perfect room to get down and dirty in as they'd done on many occasions, the memories of which both of them treasured dearly.

Especially the one time they'd gotten caught by the owners and had to jump out the window before vanishing. That was adrenaline pumping to say the least and the sex they'd had after that? Mind-blowingly amazing.

However, this time couldn't be more different if it tried.

For starters, they weren't together anymore, and there was a rather thick animosity lingering in the air between them. So thick in fact that you might have been able to cut it right in half with the rather expensive looking sword they'd just passed on their exploration through the seemingly never-ending hallway.

Secondly, this adventure wouldn't be ending in sex. Instead, it would probably end with even more heartbreak than it started with when the two of them finally had to part — for what they could only hope was the last time as neither of them had any strength left to have to go through this hostility and heartache again.

And thirdly, perhaps the most different of all the differences... was that there was a vampire patiently waiting for them just up ahead. Hiding within the shadows of a small alcove on the left side of the wall and readying itself for the perfect moment to attack. Neither Selina, nor Crowley himself, knew it was there and it wasn't until just seconds before they were about to pass by said alcove, did it lurch out in front of them, baring its fangs and with a deep bloodlust riddled in its eyes.

Immediately, Crowley reached out and grabbed Selina's hand, pulling her safely back towards him and out of the danger that was the vampire's attempt to lunge towards her. Where, had he been successful, he more than likely would have ripped out her throat before she'd even had a chance to react.

Now that she was aware of what was happening and did have the chance to react, Selina turned to her side and reached out, grabbing the sword she'd been admiring only moments ago from the display it sat upon. She had no idea she was still holding Crowley's hand as she did, or rather, that he was still holding hers as she was a little too busy trying to deal with the vampire, who lunged at them again and with one well-timed swing of the sword, its head separated from its shoulders and began to roll across the hardwood floor beneath them.

Then, out of a speaker that was as invisible as the mansion itself had been, came a well timed round of slow applause, followed swiftly by a voice that couldn't sound less enthusiastic if it had tried, "Bravo... Well done..."

Sharing a puzzled look, Selina and Crowley stepped over the slowly growing pool of blood on the floor and continued down the hallway, turning right towards some soft playing music that stopped the second they stepped foot into the room. They glanced cautiously around, looking for any more hidden vampires before their sight soon landed on a lonesome gentleman, standing next to a record player, with his hair neatly styled and his and his bow-tie sitting as perfect as could be.

"Cuthbert Sinclair?" Selina asked hesitantly, eyeing the well-dressed man carefully for any signs of nefarious means.

"Ugh, I haven't gone by that moniker in oh... fifty seven years," Cuthbert replied, reaching to his side to pick up a crystal tumbler and gently swirling the amber liquid within.

"Well, you're looking good for a guy pushing... ninety?" Selina replied, having to take a moment to make sure that was right as math never was her strong suit.

"Well thanks, darlin'," Cuthbert replied with a cheery smile, taking a short sip of his drink before continuing, "There's a spell for damn near everything these days."

"Yeah, I'm aware of that," Selina muttered, glancing out of the corner of her eye towards Crowley, who was silently seething over Cuthbert's use of a pet name. Of his pet name, he should say. He was the only one who should get to call Selina darling, but alas, he'd gone and royally screwed that up.

Although, maybe not as badly as he'd thought because this entire time, Selina had yet to let go of his hand.

"Anyway, sorry about all the theatricality," Cuthbert said as he slowly rounded a brown leather chair, gracefully taking a seat and crossing his legs. "I just wanted to see what you were made of and let me just say, I'm impressed. Back in my day, there weren't many women who could handle a sword the way you did."

"Hm," Selina hummed bluntly, wondering just how much of 'his day' Cuthbert had carried with him as she was not in the mood to deal with internal old man sexism, regardless of how young he looked on the outside. "I see you don't get out much."

Cuthbert laughed, "Oh, I get out plenty, my dear."

"Really?" Selina mused, "Well then you should know that women are a lot more than just housewives these days."

"Yes, I can see that," Cuthbert replied, and if he was bothered by Selina's bluntness then he clearly wasn't showing it. "A Woman of Letters... How far they've come in such a short period of time. Although, I must say, I thought that whole thing died out after '58?"

"It did," Selina nodded, stepping a small bit closer to him and bringing Crowley with her, "And it's true, I am a legacy, but actually... I'm a hunter."

"A hunter? Wow!" Cuthbert laughed again, openly amused by the news. "A woman hunter with the key to the kingdom! The old men must be spinning in their graves... And perhaps even more so should they know who your... associate here is."

That was the first time Cuthbert seemed to acknowledge Crowley throughout this entire interaction, his eyes swiftly dropping to his and Selina joined hands and he couldn't help but narrow them, drawing his tongue thoughtfully across the top of his bottom lip.

"Associate indeed," Cuthbert muttered, to which Selina finally realised what she'd been doing and swiftly pulled her hand from within Crowley's tight grasp, clearing her throat awkwardly and praying she wasn't as red as she felt.

"Listen, Cuthbert..."

"Ah, please dear," Cuthbert held up his hand, silencing her, "Call me Magnus."

"Alright, Magnus," Selina corrected, making Cuthbert smile to himself in satisfaction. "The reason I'm here..."

"Ah, before we get there," Cuthbert interrupted. Again. And without even appearing the least bit apologetic and honestly, Selina was starting to lose her patience. "You hunters may not care who you do business around..."

Meaning Crowley, Selina thought to herself. And it was confirmed when all Cuthbert did was widen his eyes a touch and glance towards Crowley, who was growing a strong, strong disliking towards him and his incessant need to interrupt Selina.

"But I do," Cuthbert carried on, standing up from his chair and smoothing out his jacket as he crossed the room in a few short strides. Then, before either Selina or Crowley could react, he placed his hand in his pocket and pulled out a pinch of green powder, blowing it towards Crowley before softly muttering, "Abi, ab oculis meis!"

In the blink of an eye, Crowley disappeared in a puff of smoke, causing Selina's heart to begin beating rapidly beneath her tightening chest as she had no idea what the hell just happened. She wasn't as well versed in magic as she could have been, and if something had happened to him... she'd more than likely never forgive herself for bringing him here.

"What... What did you do to him?" She asked calming, appearing outwardly unbothered aside from some heavy breathing, yet on the inside she was riddled with panic and fluster.

"Strange for a hunter to be so concerned for a demon's well-being." Cuthbert said plainly, his eyebrow raising knowingly towards Selina.

"He's my ride home," Selina replied sarcastically... sort of. It was true in the sense, but that clearly wasn't the reason she was asking. And it appeared as though even Cuthbert himself knew well of that as despite her efforts, it was written all over her face.

"I believe he's a lot more than that," Cuthbert murmured, taking a long, slow sip of his scotch as he shook his head. "In love with a demon... How the mighty must fall."

"Okay, listen here, Cuthbert ," Selina snapped, fed up with playing nice, "I didn't come here to talk to you about my love life, okay? I came here to ask for your help in making sure a Knight of Hell — the very same Knight who wiped out the Men of Letters never sees the light of day again. Now, if you refuse to help me then fine, tell me how to get out of here and I'll be on my way. But if you are, in fact, willing to help me, then do me a favour... drop the act."

Chuckling, Cuthbert nodded his head and uncurled one finger from around his glass to point towards her, "I like you Selina. You remind me a lot of your grandfather... A wild hair. And never one to back down from a fight, I'll tell you that much."

Ignoring how badly that made her wish Crowley was still here, Selina edged her way closer to Cuthbert, who simply beckoned for her to take a seat and after a moment of hesitation, she sat down.

"So Selina," Cuthbert began again the moment Selina got about as comfortable as he suspected she'd allow herself to get, "Tell me... What do you need my help with?"

The minute Selina opened her mouth she went on to tell him everything. Starting from the moment Henry came barrelling through their closet door and opened up a whole new world for her and her brothers. She mentioned Abaddon following behind and how they'd tried to stab her, to no avail.

That specific part did spark a little interest with Cuthbert when he learned exactly what they'd tried to stab her with — the demon killing knife of The Kurds. He'd actually tried to barter with her for it but Selina basically told him to dream on and that the most he'd get for his services would be an angel blade, which honestly Cuthbert was more than happy with as the angel part of his collection was thin to say the least.

Negotiations dealt with, Selina then carried on, telling him all about how they'd tracked down one of the last few remaining members of the Men of Letters and found the location of the bunker. She told him how Sam had ended up kidnapped by Abaddon and when they went to 'trade for him' she had double-crossed them — Cuthbert was not surprised to hear that at all and had a few choice words to mutter about Selina and her apparent liking for trusting demons, which she opted to ignore otherwise she may stab him with that funny looking bone blade she'd passed on her way to the couch.

The story continued with how Selina had a pretty fast hand when it came to weapons, and that she'd managed to shoot Abaddon in the head with a devil's trap bullet before she could turn and kill Henry — who Cuthbert actually seemed genuinely saddened to hear had since then been killed by the Wicked Witch. But that was a whole other story Selina did not want to tell him and instead, she kept going, mentioning how she'd built a box to house Abaddon's head in and due to her messy break-up, had stupidly dug it up from the ground in an attempt to distract herself from her thoughts.

Cuthbert stayed surprisingly quiet during that part, and instead listened intently, no doubt curious as to what sort of box was currently housing the essence of the very demon who'd killed the men he once saw as family. He was sure Selina had done the very best she could in designing the box, but he seemed to be lacking some faith, which was evident by his frequent the hm's he'd let out in response to her step by step tale on exactly how she'd built the box and the measures she'd taken in assuring its security.

"So yeah, it's probably for the best that Dean stopped me, otherwise..." Selina drew out, pressing her lips together as she raised her eyebrows in meaning — that Abaddon likely would have escaped had she been stupid enough to pull out the blowtorch.

"Well," Cuthbert exhaled, standing up to pour himself another glass of scotch, to which Selina denied his offer of one as honestly, she'd drank enough lately, "You certainly know how to tell a story and I must say, I find the life of a hunter rather fascinating."

"If you call being tossed around by werewolves and having your heart squeezed by old lady ghosts fascinating, then sure," Selina said with a hint of sarcasm, which Cuthbert ignored.

"And whilst I believe you did the very best you could in designing the, what was it, magic box?" Cuthbert said in question, making Selina nod her head to the nickname they'd given Abaddon's box. "I can see why you'd have some concerns... Nevertheless, I'd be happy to help you."

"You would?" Selina said surprisingly, which she didn't really mean, it was just, this whole time he never showed any indication that he was willing to offer his help, let alone be happy to.

"I would," Cuthbert nodded, taking a sip of his scotch. "Or rather, I'd be willing to take Abaddon's head, and this magic box off your hands and into some more... experienced ones."

"Offence taken," Selina muttered, causing Cuthbert to chuckle softly and set his glass aside before straightening from where he'd been resting on the arm of his seat.

"I'm sure you're very good at what you do, dear, but I've been doing this since long before you were born and from what you've told me... there's simply no way this box of yours will keep Abaddon encased forever," Cuthbert explained and Selina sighed, nodding reluctantly as she guessed he had a point. He then moved closer to her and held out his hand, motioning for her to take it, "Come, there's something I want to show you."

Once again reluctantly, Selina placed her hand on his and allowed him to help her to her feet. He then dropped his hold, as something told him the demon outside wouldn't be too happy to find out he'd been touching his girl, no matter what they were going through and chances are, he might come back later and threaten him. So instead Cuthbert led the way through his mansion, telling Selina brief little facts about a few of the artefacts they passed until eventually they reached what looked like a vault.

In fact, it was a vault. Like one straight out of an Ocean's Eleven movie and when Cuthbert span the spindle, only after scanning both his fingerprint and eye, the door swung open and Selina half expected to see George Clooney and Brad Pitt inside practising how they were going to steal all the cash, but instead she saw a hell of a lot more than that. Shelves littered the space and on top of them housed all manner of cursed and dangerous objects, which was evident by the amount of do not touch signs that were plastered about the place, begging the question of who else was allowed in here besides Cuthbert himself.

On one side of the room was a sarcophagus, the contents of which Selina did not want to know about as there was velvet rope cordoning off the space it occupied and by the faint sparkle to the fabric, it appeared to be electrified. How? Selina had no idea but there was no doubt in her mind it was something to do magic. The whole vault was covered in it, from sigils to spell work, even some hex bags were scattered about the place and right above her, taking up the entirety of the ceiling was a devil's trap. Only, it was no devil's trap she'd ever seen and part of her was glad Crowley wasn't here as chances are, it would have killed him the moment he crossed the threshold.

If he even could cross the threshold as something told her there were extreme measures put into place to stop anyone that wasn't human, or Men of Letters blood to be exact, from stepping foot into the vault. Thank Henry for her legacy.

"This is where I keep the most dangerous objects the world has ever seen," Cuthbert explained, picking up a pair of basic white gloves, which no doubt were riddled with magic themselves, and putting them on. He then delved further into the vault, with Selina following cautiously behind him as she marvelled at the wonder's within.

"Is that the Hope Diamond?" Selina said excitedly, stepping up to a glass box which housed inside a beautiful sapphire diamond necklace, surrounded by sixteen white diamonds and said to be one of the most cursed objects in the world. "Shouldn't that be on display in the Museum of Natural History?"

"A fake one is," Cuthbert said, pushing a button that lifted the glass case from atop the necklace. He then picked it up, making sure to never allow the diamond to touch anything but the gloves on his hands. "This however, is the real Hope Diamond, said to bring extreme misfortune and tragedy to anyone who wears it."

"Is it bad that I kind of want to wear it?" Selina asked as she chewed absently on her lips, tilting her head a little whilst gazing at her own reflection in the sapphire — which really was drawing her towards it.

Cuthbert chuckled, "Not at all. The gem is capable of enticing a person to wear it but fear not, once I place it back in its protective case, that feeling should wear off."

And he was right, the feeling wore off the second the glass lid slid back into place atop the necklace's case, allowing Selina to breathe a little in relief as she had had enough tragedy in her life, she didn't need anymore piled on on top of it. She turned away from the necklace, instead focusing her attention to a wall full of paintings, each one also covered in a no doubt magical pane of glass.

"The Anguished Man... The Crying Boy..." She mumbled to herself as she slowly paced before the paintings she'd only ever heard tales about. "The Hands Resist Him... Quite the collection you have here."

"Indeed," Cuthbert nodded, following her patiently along. "You seem to have quite the knowledge of cursed objects yourself."

"I listen to a lot of podcasts." Selina told him, hearing a faint ah slip past Cuthbert's lips. "Gotta pass the time on those long car rides somehow."

"Well, then I'm sure you know just how dangerous all of these objects can be," Cuthbert replied, and Selina simply hummed in agreement before stopping dead in her tracks when she noticed James Dean's car — his real life car sitting pretty off in the corner.

Oh, Dean would be so jealous to find out she'd seen it.

"Therefore you know that Abaddon will never see the light of day again should she join them," Cuthbert finished, waiting for Selina to take a photo of Little Bastard, then spinning on her heels to face him.

"Why?" She asked plainly, dropping Cuthbert's brow with it.

"Pardon?"

"Why are you so willing to help me when I've offered you nothing but a measly angle blade in return?"

With his brow softening, Cuthbert sighed, "Because despite what they did to me, the Men of Letters were the closest thing I ever had to a family."

"So you want revenge, is that it? Because if so then you can forget about ever seeing Abaddon..."

"I don't want revenge, Selina," Cuthbert cut her off, only this time it didn't bother her a single bit as he hadn't done so like he did earlier. Instead he almost seemed... sad rather than cocky. "I simply want justice for my brothers... You can relate to that in some way, can't you?"

Chewing at her lip, Selina nodded. She could relate to that and to tell the truth, she hadn't even thought about how it would feel for Cuthbert for her to come in here demanding help with the demon who killed his family. Part of her thought he wouldn't have cared given what they'd done to him, but by the hint of genuine sadness behind his otherwise sparkling eyes, she could tell that he was hurt. And if giving him Abaddon not only eased her own worries, but helped ease his pain, then she was more than happy to hand her over because like he said, she'd never see the light of day again and that's really all Selina had wanted in this endeavour.

That and distraction from Crowley, but that wasn't relevant here. Although he would be in a moment as she'd need him to go back home and bring her Abaddon so she could see to it that she was locked away securely in the vault.

"Okay," Selina said softly, glancing to her side momentarily and being met by the eerie stare of a creepy wooden doll. "But I'll need you to bring Crowley back in so that he can go and fetch her."

"Crowley, that's your demon... friend?" Cuthbert said carefully, gaining only a slight narrow of the eyes from Selina as she nodded once. "Very well, but let's take it back to the main foyer. I wouldn't want you to have to see him explode into a million little pieces if I summoned him in here."

A good idea, Selina thought to herself and she followed him out.

No more than five minutes later, Selina had watched as Cuthbert placed Abaddon safely into her own magical glass case in his vault, the bullet wound on her head still as bright as the day she shot her and the lipstick of poor Josie smudged all over her face. She knew she'd be secure in here and after leaving her number should Cuthbert ever want her to return the favour, Selina soon found herself back in the bunker where she was once again, in desperate need of distraction.

After all, this entire endeavour had been to distract her from Crowley and given that he'd been with her for most of it, it was safe to say that now that she was home, she was once again overwhelmed with the aching pain of her emotions. So much so, that the second she appeared in the bunker, she had to take off her jacket as the thick leather she often loved couldn't feel more suffocating if it tried.

"Selina, are you alright?" Crowley asked carefully, hearing a faint, empty chuckle leave her lips in response as she placed her hands on her hips and shook her head.

"Like you give a shit." Selina muttered to herself even though she knew he could hear her, and it crushed him that he could. She then spun on her heels to face him, before tiredly asking, "Why are you even still here, Crowley? You got what you wanted. You got to add to my misery by simply being here. Why can't you just go away and let me get over you in peace?"

"I'm just making sure that you're alright," Crowley replied quietly, pretending that that hadn't crushed his heart into dust. Even though it was what he wanted, for her to get over him, he really didn't need to hear it himself. Not from her lips anyway.

"Well don't. You lost the right to ask me that when you broke my heart," Selina said angrily. Well, about as angrily as she could bring herself to be and in reality she sounded nothing more than exhaustively broken. "You lost the right to know anything about me when you dumped me like trash okay, so don't you dare... Don't you dare come in here and act as though you care about me. As though you didn't break my very being into tiny little pieces okay, just don't."

At that, Selina spun on her heels and went to storm out of the room for a second time that day. Only, when she reached the step she stopped abruptly when she thought she heard Crowley whisper her name as he once did. Come to think of it, she could have sworn she'd seen a slight twitch of his face when she'd said that . When she'd confessed verbally that he'd broken her. But that was just a delusion, right? From lack of sleep? She was just seeing things wasn't she? Crowley didn't care about her so why on earth would he care if he had indeed broken her?

Unless... No. No, that wasn't possible... It couldn't be possible. He didn't love her. There was no way loved her and there was no way he ever could. Not with what he did to her. Not with how easy he was handling things — on the outside anyway as unknown to her he was crumbling more and more inside as each day passed idly by.

Nevertheless, Selina glanced over her shoulder to see him still standing there, his eyes gazing so deeply into hers that for a minute it felt like nothing more than him dropping her off after a day the two of them would never forget. That for a split second it felt as though they'd never been apart and when she slowly started to make her way back towards him, her legs moving on her heart's order rather than her mind, Selina's suspicion started to swiftly unravel as the very moment she stepped in front of him, Crowley took a gentle hold of her neck.

"It was real, wasn't it?" Selina whispered tearfully, lifting her hands to grip the front of Crowley's coat as he drew his thumb slowly over her pulse. "Our love... My dream... All of it."

"Yes, it was real," Crowley said absently, not giving a damn about what he was spewing and the very second the words reached Selina's ears, he gave in and kissed her. Slow. Steady, as though savouring every moment of it and unknown to her, he was. He was savouring every single part of it as he knew deep in his heart that this would be the last kiss he'd ever get to give her. "All of it was real, my darling, I do love you."

And for a moment, everything fell back into place as Selina felt every part of her heart piece itself back together. Until, once again, Crowley shattered it with a simple sentence,

"But I can't be with you."

"What?" Selina shook her head, having trouble believing what she was hearing. "What are you talking about... What are you..."

"I'm sorry, my love," Crowley said softly, drawing his thumb down the length of her neck. "But this is the way it has to be."

"Why? Why does it have to be like this?" Selina asked, so sincerely that it broke Crowley's heart in a whole new way.

"There's just too many risks, Selina," Crowley said plainly, "It's why I had to hurt you. Why I had to make it seem real as there's too many things... Too many demons out to get us, it's just not worth it."

"Not worth it?" Selina repeated, her voice cracking terribly, which led to Crowley realising what he'd just said. Or rather, what he hadn't said with it, which was: it's not worth you dying over.

"I didn't mean it like that," He said immediately, almost flusteredly and when Selina pulled from his hold, he felt a whole new wave of sorrow wash over him, making him wish for a split second he'd never gained the ability to feel in the first place.

But hey, at least she hadn't let go of him, that was something.

"No, I get it," Selina said, her voice trembling as her lip wobbled terribly. She wanted to be angry. To be pissed off but the truth was, she didn't have it in her to be. Those words, whether he meant it or not, had struck through her chest like an arrow and had it not been for her remaining hold on Crowley, she was certain they'd have sent her to the floor. "I do. I get it. I'm used to always being second best in life so it's okay. I know that I'm not worth having to fight for."

And just like that, it was Crowley's turn to get angry.

"Don't you dare say that," He gritted, raising his hands and placing them back aside her neck whether she wanted him to or not because he simply needed her to hear this. He needed her to look at him whilst she did as he could not. He would not leave here with her thinking she wasn't worth it because she was. She was worth it in every single way, but just not to the point where it risked her life. "Don't you dare say that you're not worth it because believe me, you are. You are worth more to me than anything in my life ever has been and I would fight to the ends of the earth just to be with you..."

"Then why didn't you?!" Selina cried, and finally, she was properly angry. Properly frustrated. With her chest heaving rapidly, and for a split second Crowley thought she might hit him. Until suddenly, in one deep, shuddering breath, she deflated, letting go of the front of his jacket and falling back against the pillar behind her where she quietly, heartbrokenly, added, "Why did you give me up so easily?"

Crowley hadn't thought of it like that before but she was right. He did give her up, and far too easily than he ever would have liked to have done. And even though it may not have been too late to go back on things, as by the mere way in which Selina was looking at him told him she'd more than likely take him back in a heartbeat, he simply couldn't take the risk. He'd just gotten the target off her back and he'd be damned if he stuck it back on personally.

"Because I had to," Crowley said, barely, as he was having trouble breathing let alone talking. But Selina deserved the truth this time, and so he moved his hands up, cupping her tear-stained face and having to pretend that feeling her finally lean into his touch didn't crush his heart like a grape. "I didn't want to ever give you up, my love, but I had to. They would have never stopped coming after you and I cannot — I will not watch you suffer because of me, okay? I won't. Not again."

"Then take me away," Selina said, or rather she begged. Desperately. Painstakingly, reaching out to grip the front of Crowley's jacket again in hopes that he would take it literally and disappear on the spot. With her by his side. She freed one hand, instead placing it aside his face and in a tone so soft. So innocent, she added, "Take me away. Give up the throne and let's travel the world. Let's go somewhere they'll never find us. Somewhere we can be together like we're supposed to... Like we're meant to."

"I'm sorry, Selina." Crowley whispered, and for the first time ever, his voice cracked as he did.

"Please," Selina said, around a spat of quiet sobs as she increased her grip on Crowley's coat, dropping her other hand back down to curl around the soft fabric. "Crowley, please... Please don't do this... I need you. I need..."

Placing his thumb on her lips Crowley silenced her, as anymore words out of her mouth might have killed him entirely. He brought her face towards him, placing a soft, lingering kiss to her forehead as the tears rolled down her face, dripping off the end and landing on her hands that slowly loosened as the strength faded from within her.

"You were the best thing that ever happened to me, Selina, I need you to know that" Crowley said quietly against her forehead, as looking her in the eyes right now was an absolute no go. "You were the best part of me... And for as long as I live, I'll always love you."

"Crowley..."

"Goodbye, my darling."

"Crow..." Selina couldn't even finish her word — Her plea for him before he was gone and this time...

This time she knew, deep down, that she'd never see him again.