I DON'T

Taehyung quickly wiped his tear stained cheeks, before he entered his and Jeongguk's shared bedroom. He smiled lightly, seeing his boyfriend on the bed, eyes glued to the television in concentration, where a K-drama was currently playing.

"Hey, angel" Jeongguk greeted, but didn't avert his gaze away from the display of the tv, seeming totally immersed into the plot.

Taehyung didn't say anything, wordlessly walked over to the bed to lie down next to his boyfriend and hugged him, closing his eyes. Jeongguk put the series he was watching on pause and hugged Taehyung back. "Everything alright?"

Fighting tears, Taehyung buried his face in Jeongguk's chest, feeling a knot forming in the pit of his stomach. "Everything's fine, just hold me please."

Jeongguk worriedly tightened his hold on Taehyung, giving the crown of his head a small kiss. "What did you and Bang PD talk about?"

"Nothing important," Taehyung lied, feeling guilty right after. He never lied to Jeongguk before.

The younger tilted his head suspiciously, but let it go. Taehyung would tell him if something happened. So all he did, was hold Taehyung, spooning him into his embrace like a baby. "I guess the show can wait, my only priority is you," he cooed.

Giggling, Taehyung bit Jeongguk's chest, causing the younger to squeak out in surprise and look at the brunet with wide eyes.

"Your sappy ass deserved that," Taehyung grinned.

Jeongguk squinted his eyes at him, before rolling on top of Taehyung, making Taehyung whine. "Get down, you're heavy!"

"You love when I'm on top of you, shut up!" Jeongguk mocked, laughing when he heard Taehyung do the same. The older eventually succeeded in pushing his younger lover down from his own body, but the loud thud sound that followed made him look up. Jeongguk fell from the bed.

"Oh fuck" he heard Jeongguk groan and went to the edge of the bed to look at the ravenette, rubbing his back.

Holding back laughter was so hard in a situation like this, but Taehyung tried his best. "I-I'm sorry." He went down from the bed and knelt next to Jeongguk. "Does it hurt a lot?"

"Yes, I think I'm gonna die, quick--give me a last kiss!" Jeongguk stated dramatically, trying to kiss Taehyung, who squealed, trying to push him away

"Don't joke about something like that!" He glared, but couldn't hold it much longer and bursted out laughing again, together with Jeongguk.

No, Taehyung will never let go of the happiness he feels when he is with Jeongguk.

"It's past ten, do you maybe wanna go for a walk?" Jeongguk asked after they calmed down a little.

Taehyung tensed. When it's dark outside, it's easier for the two to go out together, therefore they do that pretty often. Taehyung would love to go outside on the fresh air with Jeongguk right now, but he was a little scared after what their boss had told him.

But taking one look at Jeongguk's smiling face and his hopeful, glistening eyes, Taehyung couldn't find himself saying no. "Okay, let me get a scarf though, it's cold."

Smiling happily, Jeongguk got up, extending his hand for Taehyung to take so he can help him up too. Taehyung gladly took it, pulling himself up, trying to ignore how the veins on Jeongguk's forearm seemed like popping every second.

"I didn't expect it to be this cold," Jeongguk complained, waddling his arms in attempt
to warm himself, as the two walked around the small and quiet neighborhood, the icy night wind striking right through them.

"I told you to take a scarf with you," Taehyung scolded.

"I'm hungry," Jeongguk suddenly pouted and Taehyung rolled his eyes. "Gguk, we literally ate an hour ago."

"Still, let's go eat somewhere."

Taehyung halted in his steps. "Together?"

Jeongguk turned around, raising a confused eyebrow at his boyfriend's question. "No , me alone" he joked, "Of course together. Why?"

Taehyung looked down. It was late, who would be there anyways? "Nothing, l-let's go." He didn't look up though, keeping his gaze low. Jeongguk eyed him for a while, before continuing to walk again.

Eventually the couple reached a small noodle shop not far from their dorm. Luckily, it seemed to be empty when they entered. However, it didn't ease Taehyung's worry at all, making it unable for him to relax, constantly looking around in fear someone might see them.

A tap on his shoulder interrupted his observing and he flinched lightly.

"Where do you want to sit?"

Taehyung looked to Jeongguk and then around the room. There were six empty tables and one caught his eyes, a small table in the corner, view blocked by a few plants. "Let's sit over there" Taehyung pointed to the table and Jeongguk just nodded, walking towards that, a frown marking his face. He isn't dumb, having noticed Taehyung's uncommon behavior.

Taehyung thought about sitting in front of Jeongguk, but if he did, the plants wouldn't block the view of him, so he sat down next to Jeongguk, the younger not bothering about asking why.

"Here are your-" a young waiter halted looking at the two males with wide eyes "-menu cards" Holy crap, they're BTS!

"Thank you we only need one though," Taehyung said, nervously, he noticed the boy had recognized them.

"Are you not gonna eat?" Jeongguk asked, clear worry laced his voice and look. Taehyung shook his head.

"M'not hungry," he turned to the waiter, "also please don't tell anyone that you saw us here, we just want to eat in peace, i hope you understand," he added, hoping for the waiter, who looked around 17 to 19 years old to get what he means.

"Of course, I understand" he smiled sweetly and handed Jeongguk a menu card. "Please let me know when you're ready to order." With that he left and Taehyung breathed out relieved.

Jeongguk put the menu card down, turning his whole upper body to Taehyung. "What's wrong?"

Taehyung tried to keep a cool appearance, internally scolding himself to calm down. He never had to fake something when he was with Jeongguk- besides that they had to fake being friends- and he never knew that it would be so hard.

"There's nothing. Why are you asking?" Did he stutter? No, but his voice was still quiet, unsure.

Jeongguk reached his hand out to cup Taehyung's cheek, but the older backed away with widened eyes, a hurting heart. "What if someone sees us?"

Jeongguk furrowed his eyebrows. "There's no one Tae. Relax."

Taehyung couldn't relax, he was scared. One small mistake and he would be forced to break up with Jeongguk... That's the last thing he wants.

"B-but what if there is? We need to be more careful," Taehyung whispered and Jeongguk felt lost at words.

He huffed. "You need to tell em what's wrong, don't just act like that without letting me know why. We tell each other everything." Jeongguk placed his hand on Taehyung's thigh under the table. "We promised no secrets, right? So tell me, what's wrong?"

Taehyung looked down to Jeongguk's hot hand on his cold body, mind running wild, but not words leaving his lips.

Sighing, Jeongguk took Taehyung's chin in his hand tilting his face to look at him. "Do you want to go home?"

"B-but you are hungry."

"And you are more important. Don't you like going out like this?" he asked, letting go of Taehyung's chin.

"It's not that..." Taehyung has to make a decision, one that will keep their relationship safe. "Yes, I don't like it"