A month later

I walked into our room to see the love of my life laying in our bed taking a nap. I quietly made my way over to the side of the bed. I gingerly moved the covers away from his face and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. "Hoseok, baby I'm going to the post office to mail off a letter to my parents", I whispered making sure I wasn't too loud so I wouldn't fully wake him up.

He slightly nodded his head against the pillow then he turned to his other side and continued sleeping. A warm smile formed on my face, he was just so adorable when he was asleep. I exited the room grabbing a piece of paper, an envelope, a pen and a stamp. I then grabbed my house keys and I made my way down the street to my favorite place. The willow tree.

I would always write letters to my family in this willow tree. It's like a tradition for me.

I placed the envelope full of my writing supplies between my lips. I grabbed two branches and I hoisted myself up into the tree. I climbed pretty high up so the draping leaves would keep me hidden from sight. I leaned up against the trunk of three, closing my eyes. Taking in the nature around me.

Nostalgia welcomed every sense of mine, engulfing me. I took in a deep breath, and I prepared to begin writing. The pencil effortlessly moved on the paper writing down everything I wanted to tell my parents.

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Dear eommawa appa,
It's been about a month since that scare at the hospital. I thought I was going to loose him. But thank god that he's still here with me. He's been doing a lot better since last month but he's still struggling with depression. We've tried almost everything but nothing has worked. Almost every night I have to convince him that I love him and that life is worth living. I really do want him to get better but it's been very tiring. We've been dating for 4 months and I truly love him with all my heart but I need a break from all this negativity. Seeing him through this dark time has really put a damper on my happiness. I'm scared that I might be falling into depression over him. Seeing him go from the happiest person I've ever met to the most depressed person I've ever met really takes a toll on my mindset. And I think it's best for me to focus on my well being before anyone else's. I really hope I don't make his depression worse by leaving him but I have to do what's best for me.
~Salanghae Jimin
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I didn't realize but tears managed to escape past my tear ducts, seeping into the letter. I told myself I wouldn't cry but that was a promise I couldn't make myself. I wiped the tears off my face and I climbed down the tree.

I decided to jog to the post office that was right down the street so that I could go home and see the love of my life, Hoseok. I had been away from him for too long.

After a nice easy jog back home from the post office I unlocked the door and scanned the living room. There was no sight of Hoseok. I then checked the kitchen and our bed room, he wasn't there either. That only left one place left in our tiny apartment. The bathroom.

I refused to let my mind think of the worst possible scenarios. I kept telling myself that everything is okay, that he's just using the restroom, No need to worry. So I decided to go to the kitchen to get myself a glass of water while I waited for Hoseok. I sat there at the counter aimlessly drinking my glass of water. A couple of minutes passed by. Then a couple of minutes changed to five and five went to ten and ten went to fifteen.

I looked over at the bathroom door, anxiety begging to spread over my whole body. My breathing got heavy and my heart raced. I could no longer fight the fear of finding him laying there, with a bottle of pills by his side.

I hesitantly walked up to the door, softly knocking on it. "H-hoseok are you in there?", I shakily asked. My ears were straining to hear what was going on on the other side of the door. But all I could hear was my heart pounding. I waited a bit longer but after awhile there was no response.

I knocked again this time louder. "Hoseok, please answer me", I pleaded. Tears began to swell up in my eyes. "Hoseok, p-please", I pleaded once more. Hoping that he would respond...... Silence.

I was no longer able to hold back tears, they pored out leaving warm salty streaks down my cheeks.

I pressed my forehead up against the door, desperately wanting to just go though. "God dammit Hoseok, why do you do this to me?", I sobbed through gritted teeth.

"You make me worry like crazy!", I shouted, slamming my hand into the door.

I took a deep breath preparing myself to shout again, "I'm clearly here waiting for you, with my arms wide open. I'm willing to love you yet you let your depression manipulate you!"

"I know it's not your dam fault but come on! I'm tired of dealing with this. I'm tired of waiting. Most of all I'm tired of seeing you hurt like this", I sat there leaning against the door. Guilt immediately washed over me. I couldn't believe the hurtful, disgusting words I just said.

A faint tap came from the other side of the door, catching my attention.
"I need hope", was all that was said.

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~MiinYoongii