I walked down the street, taking in the beautiful day. It was warm and sunny out with a slight breeze, it was perfect. The whole world around me seemed perfect. So perfect that I almost forgot, just for a moment, that my world was falling apart because of me.

My mind was swarmed with thoughts of the night 3 days ago. I just couldn't stop thinking about it.

Ever since that night, silence was a guest that was often lingering in our house.

I tried apologizing to him multiple times and every time he claimed that he forgave me. But I know that it was lie.

There was no longer any happiness in his eyes. They were bland and empty, similar to a void. He never smiled, and he rarely ever spoke. He lost the remainder of his happy spirit, and it was all my fault.

Knowing that I was the reason for making his depression worse ate at my conscious.

Gosh I felt like such an asshole, I regretted every word I said. I would do anything to fix it. But sadly I don't think there's a way to.

[J-Hope POV]

I laid in bed staring at the celling. My mind was blank. The words that Jimin said that night was like a knife to the heart. But all that pain is gone now. I became numb.

No matter how hard I tried to be happy or even sad I just couldn't. No emotion ever came, it was like I was empty. I was just a shell with an empty inside.

I lost all my purpose in life. I lost the little inspiration I had left. But worst of all I lost all of the love I once had for Jimin.

Jimin... Park Jimin. The man I used to love. The man who says he unconditionally loves me. It's funny how I used to believe that. I was so stupid and naive to believe for just a second that someone could love me.
No one could love me. No one.

I subconsciously got up and made my way to my safe place, the bathroom.

I used to absolutely hate the bathroom. It would always remind me of three horrific feelings, emptiness, isolation and helplessness. But that was in the past. Over the past three nights I have found a new adoration for the bathroom and those three feelings. The only odd part is that it wasn't just a sudden adoration. It was an obsession. I began to love and crave those feelings.

I walked into the bathroom and locked the door. I placed my hands on the sink leaning on the counter. Looking at my miserable self in the mirror. I stood there staring into my blank eyes. Deep down I could feel this urge. An urge that wouldn't go away, one that I couldn't control. This feeling would've made any sane person scared half to death. But I knew exactly what it was. I knew that today was the day. Today was the day I was going to finally put an end to this shitty life of mine.

I hastily opened the cabinet. Oh the cabinet. The wonderful cabinet full of my happy pills that don't do shit.

They don't make you happy. They just make you feel like more shit than you already were before you had them. All they're good for is for killing yourself.

I searched the shelves, grabbing all the bottles that I could find. The pills ranged from antidepressants to Tylenol. I honestly was desperate for whatever drug I could find. Anything that could put me asleep for eternity.

I wasn't sure if Jimin, "the love of my life, who will unconditionally love me no matter what", was home or not. I didn't care if he was or wasn't all hoped for was that he would come banging on the door pleading for me to open it like he always does. But instead of me finally opening it he would break it down to find my empty shell of a body, laying there.

I began to chuckle at the morbid scenario playing in my head while I began to open all the bottles of pills.

Each bottle I opened sent an extremely pleasurable shiver through my body. The delicious fumes that were trapped in the bottles danced through the air. Welcoming my nose with every inhale I took.

Once all the bottles were opened I hungrily stared at them. I contemplating which pill I would consume first.

"Ennie, Meanie, Minie, Mo~", my finger landed on the bottle of painkillers.

"Painkillers it is!", I shouted a wicked smile forming on my face.

I grabbed the bottle and took a deep breath, preparing myself to swallow the whole bottle in one go.

I tilted my head back and dumped all the pills into my mouth. I immediately swallowed as many as I could. In the middle of swallowing I reached for another bottle. Preparing to dump that one in my mouth right after.

The feeling of pills lodging themselves down my throat sent a thrill through my veins. It was so fascinating to know that I was swallowing full bottles of pills one after another and somehow I hadn't choked and died yet.

After about three bottles of pills my arm began to become very limp. Then my knees began to get weak along with my head beginning to spin.

I've experienced this feeling before, it was one that I no longer feared.

I managed to grab one more bottle and swallow a couple more pills before I collapsed to the ground. My vision slowly began blacking out.

Until....

everything........

was.........

Black.

A/N:

That's the end of this short story.

I hope you all enjoyed it!

Thank you all so much for reading <3

Don't forget to vote and comment ;)

~MiintYoongii ♡