June March pushed her car door closed, pushing her sunglasses up onto her  head as she made her way towards the country club. Her mother had reminded her the day before that they were members and that June should use the amenities provided considering they were free to her. As much as she didn't want to agree with her mom...she was right, the country club had plenty of things she could use. So she had put on some running shorts and a tank top, and decided she would hit the gym, see if running was still her thing. Her brother had offered to go with her and then had disappeared with plans, June feeling betrayed that he'd choose Zach over her. Still she figured exercising was something she could try to get back into. June pulled the front door open and headed towards the desk, the lady smiling as she looked at the youngest March.

"Ms. March! It's been awhile since we've seen you! How are you doing?" Martha, the woman behind the desk, asked. June gave a genuine smile as Martha began to type into the computer.

"I'm doing fine. How are you?"

"Not too bad. You're all set." June smiled and gave the woman an appreciative nod, her ponytail swaying as she made her way towards the gym. It had been a long time since she had really exercised, most of her ability to stay in shape coming in the form of sprinting and running for her life.

June pushed the door open to the gym, her eyes dropping to her phone as she tried to find a playlist. A few texts from JJ popped up at the top and she swiped them away, letting out a sigh as she tried to drown out reality with music. She was struggling immensely in deciding if her decision was too hasty, and in some aspects she was asking for a sign, something to tell her she had done the right thing. Finally she got some music on, the girl making a beeline for the locker room. She then hurried out, hoping to catch a treadmill.

There was a few open, today apparently not being a busy day in the gym. She was quick to adjust it and decided to walk as a warm up, her eyes on the controls as she fixed her speed. She let the music blast in her ears and drown out the thoughts in her head that reminded her of the big life decisions she had been making. Everything was fine for a few moments before she heard a ding, her eyes lowering to her phone at what set up against the panel of the treadmill. She turned her head to see who had texted and realized it was JJ again, her heart skipping a beat as she saw his name.

She didn't know whether to hate herself or not because she had forgiven him. She remembered the girl who swore she would make him regret it, she felt like she had accomplished so that, he had been groveling for months, hoping to earn her back. Sometimes it felt like enough, but sometimes the sound of his voice telling her she didn't matter reverberated through her head, and she was reminded exactly why she had given him up in the first place.

Sarah's opinion on their relationship had bludgeoned the idea in her head that everything would just return to normal, a normal that she hadn't lived in in a long time. She felt like getting back together with him was like getting back with a completely different person, and she wondered if he felt the same. The June he used to know was not the one he was with now.

She turned the speed up, breaking into a jog as the music blared but could no longer drown out her thoughts. She asked again for a sign that she should continue, that everything would be okay, that they would  actually make it this time. She turned the speed up. She wondered if she could find clarity soon, because the three days since had been torture, and while she wanted desperately to give herself to him fully, she was holding back for clear reasons. This was not a decision she was making lightly, she knew it wouldn't be, but she had opened a door for him and he had wedged his foot in, walking inside and making himself at home. She needed to know if she could live with that anymore.

All at once and out of nowhere June felt a terrible chill go down her spine, her eyes lifting and then widening when she caught sight of someone across the room. The sight of him made her sick to her stomach and she stumbled over herself, unable to keep her pace and pulling the emergency stop. She assumed she made a lot of noise because everyone turned to look at her, her breaths heaving and her face flushed as she bent over to catch her breath. She stared down at the floor in disbelief, wondering if she had hallucinated or if she had really seen him there, the girl blinking a few times as she stared. She closed her eyes for just a moment, and hoped he wasn't really there, her stomach in knots of uncertainty and nervousness.  She let out a shuddering breath and looked up, only for a second, her dark eyes meeting blue from across the room. Of course he was really there...of course right when she was pleading for a sign—this is what she would receive. June March turned a cold shoulder to the unwanted attention from an unwanted guest, her breaths still heavy as she looked back to the treadmill. She stepped back onto it, her breaths calming as she sent another stolen glance in his direction. He was really there...Rafe Cameron was really there. And why wouldn't he be? He was everywhere.

He was holding a barbell in his two hands, his eyes staring straight ahead and avoiding her. He curled the bar towards his chest as he felt the burning sensation of eyes, but after the first glance he was determined not to look back at her. Of course she was there...she was everywhere, her presence haunted him. It was only a matter of time before she materialized. 

June looked away, clearing her throat as she clicked the speed button again. She went from a jog to a sprint, her eyes staring straight ahead. Her stomach felt queasy and weak as she felt the weight of just being in the same room as him. The burden of their shared secrets being too much to bear. She tried to resist but she couldn't help herself as she stole another glance, trying to play it off but making eye contact with him.

Rafes teeth grit as he continued to curl the bar, his breaths shuddering out from the workout and from the desperation he was fighting in his chest. He was mad at her, he had been mad at her for awhile, and he knew he couldn't say anything...because the two of them had an agreement. He kept his eyes straight forwards and tried not to look, but he couldn't help the insatiable urge to glance at her.

June felt a frustration build in her, the girl wondering why he had to come into the gym on the very day she decided to go. Her mind began to theorize and she wondered if he was tracking her again, something that he seemed to like to do. The longer they existed in the same room together the more frustrated they both grew and soon enough it was too much for June to bear, the girl pulling the emergency stop again.  She let out heavy breaths as she stepped off of the treadmill, half of it being from  the running and the other half being from sheer agitation. She grabbed her phone and turned her music off, starting as quickly towards the locker room as she could. The second she reached for the gym door she heard the sound of the bar dropping to the ground, her pace quickening as she walked away. Rafe hurried behind her, so genuinely mad at her just for existing. She could feel him following her but she tried to make it to the locker room, the girl wishing the walk wasn't as long as it was. The sound of speeding footsteps behind her almost made her break out into a run, but she accepted the inevitable, a huff of air falling from his lips as he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into a linen closet, closing the door behind him.

"Fuck you!" She said the instant they weee face to face, her hands connecting with his chest and pushing him back into the shelf of pool towels.  He didn't even looked stunned, only angry, the boy bouncing back quickly and shaking his head at her. "What—are you following me again?"

"Following you? No. We had an agreement."

"So you just happen to be at the gym the one day I decide to go?" His face contorted into one of pure disbelief and he was quick to retort, making her feel dumb.

"That's just like you to think everything is about you! I come here everyday, you're the one who randomly showed up." He was in her face, Junes lip curling up as he made her feel stupid for not considering not everything was about her.

"Did you have to follow me? Did you have to pull me into a closet? Where was this urgency to see me when you abandoned me at a boarding school for three months and stopped visiting?!" Her words made him roll his eyes, the girl pushing her finger into his chest and making him scoff. He hurried to bite back, the boy pressing his hand to his chest to defend himself.

"Oh you're never gonna let that go are you?"His eyes danced over her face as he saw how sweaty she was, his stomach turning as she looked up at him. Her mouth dropped open and he knew he should've said something else, not meaning to chalk his absence up to nothing.

"Let it go?! You were the only thing keeping me sane in that place and then you stopped visiting. I was there because of what you told me to do! Fuck you." They stared at each other, Rafes nostrils flaring as he let out huffs of air, his hands clenching at his side as he felt an ache in his back from where she had pushed him against the shelf. His eyes traced over her as she looked away from him, her arms crossing over her chest as she wondered what he would possibly say next. She was already gearing up for her next remark when he noticed a small mark peaking out from the neckline of her top.

"What's this?" His hand lifted from his side and he pulled the fabric down a little bit, June quick to pull his hand from her chest.

"Don't touch me." She said in a warning tone, her neck turning red from anger as she wondered who he thought he was. However his eyes were glued to the spot and he let out a low groan, a dark look entering his eyes as he shook his head at her.

"I swear to god if you're fucking with that Pogue again to get back at me—"

"Wow...that's just like you to think everything is about you." June almost regretted saying it when he spoke next, his tone sounded serious and carrying a warning tone.

"June." Her eyes narrowed at the anger and resentment in his eyes as they wavered between the mark and her face, her arms crossing over her chest as she caught his attention.

"I'm not fucking with 'that pogue', his name is JJ and he's my boyfriend." She said defiantly, her chin turning up at him as she dropped boyfriend and JJ in the same sentence out loud. They stood at a standstill for a moment before his lips screwed up into smile and he actually laughed.

"Your boyfriend? And it's gonna work out so much better this time?" He was actively mocking her, her defense going up as she aimed to prove him wrong.

"Yes it is." His smile and laugh dropped and he got in her face again, June attempting to hold her ground as he towered over her.

"No...June—it's really not. Because you keep doing the same thing over and over again, thinking something will change...but it won't." His words only enraged her, her chest heaving as she bit the inside of her cheek. She could see it in his eyes and it made her sick, the anger, and that devotion.

"That's not true...the only person I made that mistake with was you." She said, cutting as deep as she possibly could. However his steely demeanor didn't seem to crack and he kept on, his face closing in towards her with poison on his tongue.

"You know how I know I'm right? Because we're the same—and I know you just can't help but to fuck it all up. Because come fall...you'll be right back to your old self again. You can't help it." She swallowed hard, trying not to believe a word he said. He was wrong, they were not the same. He was bad and she was good and he was only saying this because he knew she was unsure of herself. But she had to stay strong, even when his words felt like knives digging into her certainty and making it bleed.

"Whatever you think is happening here isn't happening. We've been done. It's over." She said, attempting to hit him the same way he had hit her. It was the largest insult he had to say they were alike, knowing how much she hated him and herself, and wondering if that hatred was akin to anything. He stared deeply into her eyes and spit his words, her stomach feeling like it was going to implode with fear at what he said.

"It's never over." He said it like a promise, the words tattooing themselves into her body and she was so stubborn she swore she would erase them on her own. She would prove him wrong, she would prove Sarah wrong, she would prove her parents wrong. She would prove everyone wrong about who they thought she was.

"We're not the same." She said as she looked up at him, only a millisecond of doubt  flashing across her eyes. He was too quick to notice it, that slick smile crossing his lips again as he shook his head at her. She pushed him back and hurried to the door, wanting to be as far away from him as she possibly could. She felt tears prick at her eyes for some unknown reason and he ripped the door open behind her,  walking into the hall and yelling after her.

"Whatever you when to tell yourself to help you sleep at night June! You know the truth! You just cant  accept it!" She let his words bounce off of her back as she jogged towards the exit, biting her lip so that those angry tears wouldn't escape. When she pushed the door open she felt the fresh air, the wound of the ocean behind her, and for a moment she felt like she might implode, like those walls she had been using to shut out every bit of bad in her life would collapse and flood her and she would have nothing to do but to die under the weight of them.

And then she sucked in a breath of new air, unlocked  her car door, developing the ability to move on with every step she took towards her car. When she reached the car she was able to exist without feeling like she was seconds away from crumbling. She pulled the door open and quickly headed home, attempting with everything in her to think of anything but what had just happened.

And then she remembered...Erika Harris hadn't called her back about the dress yet. June had a key sitting in the bottom of her purse, waiting to unlock an important safe. Maybe now was the time to do that. Maybe that would get her mind off of things. But she needed help, and she knew exactly where she could get it from.