(I'm not cursing in this book btw) (also sorta a vent??) So anyways my basketball team is hating on me because I'm upset abt the fact I'm missing out on my bsf of three years aka one of the first real friends I've had because I had problems talking in my younger years because of different things such as adhd FOR A FKING GAME THAT WERE PROBABLY GONNA LOSE CAUSE WE SUCK AHH I also hate the sport and was forced to sign up for it because of my dumb parent who wants me to play a sport and be amazing. And simply because I told them that they started goin off abt how one of them missed they're dads and grampas funeral because were a team and teams are like families and tbh I don't give a freak like I'm sorry for your lose but I'm not feeling bad for you trying to guilt trip me into being upset. I am supposed to have feelings and that is the stuff I struggle with. I've already profusely apologized to my bsfs because I care sm abt them and even though they say it's fine I feel like it's my fault because one of our friends already can't show up and I'm coming now HOURS LATE LIKE 7 HOURS. They can call me whatever but idrc because I've had a great day and I haven't had a single episode till now and it's F,ing because of them. I've really been struggling lately and I just can't really believe they aren't trying to even see from another point of view. I was finally starting to get along with them (we've been together for 4 months I just struggle with social situations) and it's ruined. Do I apologize even though I'm not sorry or do I tell them off like I want to. There's only one person who hasn't spoke that I'm not mad at and I get she also struggles with anger issues and adhd so I really hope they get it. There also saying I'm trying to abandon them for no reason??? So all of a sudden me saying "I'm kinda upset I have to go to the game cause I'm missing out on something really important" is me being such a horrible teammate. They also said there are things more important than bsfs, THEN FKING FIND ONE FOR ME BECAUSE OTHER THEN WATTPAD AND YOUTUBE THEY ARE MY LIFE AND I WOULD PROBABLY KMS FOR THEM SO YOU CAN THROW THAT OUT THE GODDAMN WINDOW 

I would send screenshots of the convo and blur there name but I also respect there privacy so thank you for coming to my Ted talk.