"You're not alone"

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"What took you guys so long?" John asked,

"Uuh, it's called 'girl time' sweetheart." JiJi sassed then smiled. "Now leggo eat loonch!"

She marched off with us following behind. We went to the front yard by the bleachers and sat down on the last bench. We opened up our bento boxes and started eating. They got me tempura, the boys both got calamares, and JiJi got noodles and salad. After we were done eating, we put our boxes at the side and then talked.

"Mika." Ryan started. I looked at him with weak eyes. "Why didn't you tell us you were bullied?"

"I-- uh-- u-uh." I stuttered trying to find the correct words to say as they stared down at me. I really hate being in the center of attention, I'm so sensitive almost about everything. I gripped on my arms, feeling the stinging pain as a reassurance. "I-- um."

Oh no, they're gonna find out my secret! They'll be scared! Just like Mary, Liz and Patty! No! I can't. I can't say anything. No.

"Mika, please don't cry." I didn't realize I was crying when I felt a warm hand touch my cheek, pulling me out from my thoughts. I looked up and saw Ryan's sky eyes. "Hey it's okay."

"N-no." I muttered out, standing up. They gave me series of looks.

"What? Why?" John asked.

"No. I-i can't." I replied as I took a step backwards but immediately regretted it when I felt my foot stuck under the bench and felt myself falling. "Woah!"

I gasped when a strong grip held onto my arm. The stinging sensation you call pain shot throughout my arm making me cry out a bit. The hand pulled me back from my place but I immediately sat down on the floor cradling my arm. I looked up at them and saw faces of relief, confirmation, and pity.

"Hm." John breathed out from his nose with a small, sad smile.

"Just as we thought." Ryan confirmed with the tiniest smile.

"W-what?" I asked. I looked at JiJi who was sitting in front of me. She was staring at my eyes. I blinked a couple of times.

"You have beautiful eyes, you know." She commented with a warm smile. I didn't say anything but my eyes started to pool tears.

What are they doing? What are they talking about? What?

"It's a shame for you to cry like that sweetie." JiJi took out a green handkerchief and wiped my eyes with it. When she pulled her hand away she continued to stare at me. I sniffed then looked down at my arms, covered with the arm bands.

"You're depressed aren't you?" I looked up at JiJi again with astonishment.

"H-how did you?"

"We can see through that smile of yours Mika." Ryan commented.

"Though your eyes too." John added. I was about to ask why again but I heard JiJi giggled. I looked at her, seeing her smile.

"Don't worry. You're not actually alone." She smiled so warmly that it makes me wanna cry again.

"W-what do you mean?" I managed to ask. Instead of replying, JiJi stood up and took out a yellow towel and drenched it with water from her water bottle. She sat in front of me again and held her left arm out. She looked at me with assuring eyes before gazing at her arm and wiped it with the towel. I gasped at what I saw.

Lines, lots and lots of jagged lines. Some dead white and some fresh red. They were seen only on the spot she wiped with her wet towel. It was all clear but slowly fading to her natural skin tone. That's when I realize, it was make up.

"That's some pretty heavy make up." I commented as I fixed my eyes on her arm. She then withdrew her towel again and wiped her entire arm with it. The marks were everywhere. From her wrist to her forearm. I gasped.

"Ugly. I know." JiJi laughed quietly. I looked at her.

"I-i-- uh." I stuttered. She looked at me.

"May I see yours?" She asked. I continued to stare at her then slowly at my arm bands. I hesitated but pulled them off. Fresh, very fresh cuts were revealed to their very eyes, they started at my wrists to my forearm and I was afraid on what they're going to say.

I heard footsteps and saw Ryan hovering above me. He stared at me along with JiJi who didn't look up at him. He crouched down beside JiJi and looked at me. He reached a hand out for my arm but hesitated.

"May I?" He asked with pleading eyes. I blinked, but slowly nodded. His warm hand made contact with my arm. He cradled it like a treasure, like it will break any moment. Then slowly he bent his head down to my arm and his warm lips made contact with my cuts, I gasped. When he pulled back, he looked at me.

"Just as what JiJi has said." Ryan started. "You're not alone." He smiled before retrieving the towel from JiJi and wiped his arm with it. And just as the same as JiJi. He has cuts as well but not only cuts, bruises too.

Ryan handed the towel to John who was sitting on the bench because there wasn't any space on the floor anymore. He too wiped it on his arm to reveal cuts and bruises.

"Long story short but we're depressed as well." John gave a humoring smile. I stared at the three people around me with a shock face.

"It took me like an hour to place in the make up for the three of us." JiJi sighed dramatically. John grinned at her while Ryan softly smiled.

"Well it's necessary JiJi." Ryan said, nodding.

"Well yeah." JiJi agreed, then looked back at me. "We're all abused at home."

"Ryan's parents are divorced and his father blamed it on him." John said.

"John's family died in a fire 5 years ago and was taken in by a psychopath, he's bipolar as well." JiJi said.

"JiJi was abandoned when she was very young, 2 years old. Was taken in by an abusive drunkard." Ryan said with a scowl as John growled. JiJi sweatdropped.

"Fucking overprotective assholes." JiJi whispered under her breath.

"Hey we heard that!" John said hitting JiJi on the head.

"A-ah. Sorryyyy. Hehehe." JiJi joked. Ryan raised an amused eyebrow at them.

"Why?" I whispered, the three looked at me.

"Hm?" JiJi asked.

"Why are you all so happy? All so joking and humoring about everything when your lives are all fucked up?" I asked. "You were so happy when I first met you but when I found out the truth.."

"Well the truth hurts, isn't it not?" John asked.

"Aren't you afraid?" I asked. "Afraid to go home and experience all those beatings again?"

"Afraid?" JiJi snorted. "Tch. I'm not afraid. I'm terrified."

"Same here." Ryan agreed rubbing his abused arms. John hummed in agreement staring at nowhere.

"If you don't want us to be with you then you can leave if you want. But that isn't an option for us." JiJi said.

"But I'm boring, plain, and ugly." I said. "I now believe no one would ever want to hang out with a lame loser, crybaby person like me." Scrawny hands reached for my face and wiped my tears away. I looked at the source of the hands and saw JiJi.

"Just as I said earlier." She giggled.

The last tear slid out.

"You're not alone."