I saw you this morning

and that's when I decided

that I would talk to you today.

And just possibly,

I'd tell you about my feelings, too.

The last bell rang,

and I  heard your friends talking,

saying that you'd be behind the school.

So I grabbed my stuff

and quickly made my way to the back of the school.

I saw you first,

and then I saw 

Mackenzie.

I frowned.

"just please nathan"

She grabbed your arm.

"i love you"

You said nothing.

I walked closer.

"please"

I paused as she grabbed your face,

and in the next second,

you two were kissing.

My chest tightened.

And my eyes watered.

But fighting off the feeling in my stomach,

I just blinked rapidly to clear my vision.

I felt dizzy.

A second passed,

and then another one.

I couldn't move.

And even as I tried to withhold them,

tears escaped freely now.

"nathan"

I asked softly,

and your lips ripped off of hers as quick as lightning.

"elliot wait"

I don't know why you said that.

I wasn't going to move.

I couldn't move.

"it's fine nathan"

My voice cracked.

"i just wish you would've told me first"

I wiped the tears from my eyes

before forcing a small smile on my face.

You grabbed my hands.

"no elliot. it's all a misunderstanding..."

"just please. i'm so sorry"

You were crying too.

I don't know why though.

You were the one who decided

to kiss her back.

"it's okay nathan"

I said,

trying and failing to rip my hands from yours

to wipe away my tears.

"it really is"

You looked at me helplessly,

I just smiled.

Well,

at least I think it was a smile.

"i'm sorry elliot"

I thought you were going to wrap your arms

around me,

apologize profusely,

and tell me that you still liked me,

that you still wanted to be with me

as more than just friends.

You didn't.

You just let go of my hands

and gave me a sad smile

before taking a step back.

"did you even like me"

I blurted out,

not being able to stop myself.

"like really like me"

"just not for pity or for guilt"

and you froze.

Silence passed by us

and I could see Mackenzie from my peripheral,

waiting for your answer, too.

But seconds ticked by

and you didn't say anything.

Before you could see me break down 

completely,

I nodded,

turned around,

and started walking away.

My steps were unsteady

and my heart had never hurt so much.

How could I be so stupid for believing you?

How could I be this naive?

How could I be so... pathetic?

I guess this is what I get for falling for you.

Instead of me breaking your heart,

you broke mine.

Ha!

Fate sure twisted this around!

And as I clutched my chest,

tears burning the back of my throat,

I thought to myself

I'm fine

I'm fine

I don't need you

I'll be fine.

| Nathan, you idiot! Don't be a silent reader and tell me your thoughts down below! I'm Fine is slowly drawing to a close ='(  I'd like to thank you guys for how far this story has gone: from gaining 2 reads a week to thousands of reads in a single day! It's almost unbelievable, really. Only two more parts to go. Also, I want to wish a very happy birthday to Introverted-Cat! I hope your first day back to school wasn't all that bad!

P.S. Don't hate me! |