Chapter Thirteen

Friend

"What is it that you want to talk about?"

I turned to Ezion. Chelca's birthday party was over and most of the guests already went home. "Nakauwi na sina Gretchen at Julius?"

Ezion nodded. "Yes. What is it?"

Hindi pa agad ako nagsalita. I turned to look around and then after I gave back my attention to Ezion. Kaming dalawa lang naman ang nakatayo doon. "Is Julius really your son?" I started asking.

Ezion looked like he was taken aback by my question. Nagkatinginan kami. We looked into each other's eyes for a while. And then he slowly sighed. "I married Gretchen years ago because she was pregnant..." Natitigilan pa siya.

Bahagyang kumunot ang noo ko. "Did you know that it wasn't your child she was carrying, or..."

Ezion shook his head. "I knew... But I chose to father Julius..."

My lips parted. I didn't know what to say next. Parang nagkahalu-halo ang mga nararamdaman ko. Pero isa ang siguradong umusbong sa akin at iyon ay ang galit. Galit para sa pang-aabandona niya noon kay Chelca dahil mas pinili niyang magpakasal sa babaeng hindi naman siya ang nakabuntis. Awang pa rin ang labi ko at nang tinikom ko ito ay mariin at sandali rin akong pumikit. I tried to calm myself down. "Alam mo rin noon na buntis ako, hindi ba?"

Napapikit din si Ezion. Before he opened his eyes again, begging. "Gretchen was fragile at that time. She was so lost. I was afraid she'd do something to harm herself and the baby."

"That's why you chose her and her child than your own daughter?"

Hindi nakasagot si Ezion.

Umiling ako in disappointment. Ezion just disappointed me more after hearing the truth now and from him. Hindi ako makapaniwala na pinagpalit niya si Chelca na totoo niyang anak sa anak naman ni Gretchen sa ibang lalaki. "I can't believe you, Ezion."

"Ciri—"

"Gretchen was fragile? How about me? I was young, Ezion. I got scared, too! Namatay pa si Daddy... Bumagsak ang pamilya namin."

Ezion looked away and guilt was obvious on his face. My lips quivered and tears started pooling in my eyes. "Hindi ako makapaniwala sa pinili mong gawin. I know that I was at fault, too. Alam kong hindi mo tayo binigyan ng linaw noon. Pero pumayag din ako. But do I deserve to suffer the consequence alone? And where were you all those years?! Bakit nga ba ngayon ka lang nagpakita kay Chelca? Don't give me a bullshit answer that we were away. That I went away. May pera ka Ezion at puwedeng pwede mong punatahan ang anak mo! O kahit gumawa ka man lang ng paraan para magkaroon kahit kayo nalang ng communication. Pero wala! I tried but you never reached out!" I can't help it anymore.

"I'm sorry..." mahina niya lang na hingi ng tawad.

Iyan nalang ang kaya niyang gawin?

Kinalma ko rin ang sarili ko. Nasa venue pa rin kami kahit wala naman na ang mga bisita. But my family's still here. "Sa totoo lang, Ezion, kung hindi lang para kay Chelca ayaw na kitang makita pa. I'm just doing this for Chelca. Hindi ko na alam kung mapapatawad pa ba kita. Because to be honest I hate you. And I hate you so much right now for what you've done. You know what?" I looked at him straight in the eyes. "I find you stupid." I said to him harshly. "Stupid for raising someone who isn't your child. Na ni wala ka namang patak ng dugo sa batang 'yon. Imbes na sana ibinuhos mo ang mga oras na binigay mo kay Julius kay Chelca na totoo mong anak. I am very disappointed with you."

Wala naman sigurong masama sa pagpapalaki ng bata na hindi mo kadugo. Pero ang magpalaki ng anak ng iba kaysa magpalaki ng sarili mong anak... I find it not right. Lalo na at kung kailangan siya ni Gretchen o ni Julius noon kailangan din naman siya ni Chelca na anak niya.

Hindi na nagsalita si Ezion. We also heard Chelca approaching us. "Mommy! Daddy!"

Huminga ako at kinalma ang sarili. Pinigilan ko ang emosyon ko at naghanda ng ngiti bago ko hinarap ang anak ko. "Chelca." I gave my daughter a smile like everything's okay. "Are you ready to go home?"

Tumango naman ang anak ko. "Yes, Mommy. Nilagay na po namin nina Tito Caleb ang gifts ko sa car."

"All right. Let's go." Kinuha ko na ang kamay ni Chelca. Sa medyo malayo ay nakita ko rin si Declan na mukhang naghihintay din sa amin.

"Daddy,"

Bumaba si Ezion para maglebel sila ni Chelca. Hindi ko na siya tiningnan. "Goodbye for now, Chelca. You go home with your Mommy. I will visit you again, okay?"

Chelca nodded like she understood. "Okay, Daddy."

"Be good to Mommy."

Naramdaman ko ang tingin sa akin ni Ezion pero hindi ko na siya nilingon.

"Opo."

"Good girl." Hinagkan ni Ezion si Chelca.

Pagkatapos nilang magpaalam sa isa't isa ay dinala ko na rin si Chelca sa sasakyan ni Declan para makauwi na kami. Sina mommy at Ate Cianna ay sumabay na kanila Lorie sa kotse naman ni Kuya Caleb. Pwede rin kaming ihatid ni Ezion pero sa nangyaring pag-uusap namin ngayon ay alam na niyang ayaw ko na siyang makasama pa nang matagal kahit magkasabay man lang kami sa kotse niya pauwi.

"Are you all right?" Declan asked me while we were already inside his car and he's driving. While Chelca fell asleep on the backseat.

Bumaling ako kay Declan. I gave him a small smile. "I'm okay, Declan..."

Tumango lang siya at hindi na nagtanong pa. Nanatili ang tingin ko sa kaniya nang ilang sandali habang focused naman ang mga mata niya sa pagmamaneho. I noticed that one of things that I liked about Declan is that he never pushed me to tell him anything or to do anything. He has enough patience to wait for me until I'm ready to share something to him or with anything.

"Thank you sa paghatid sa amin ni Chelca, Declan."

"It's all right. Ihahatid ko na kayo. I'll carry Chelca to your unit."

"Naku, huwag na. Kaya ko naman..."

"She's heavy, Ciri. Ako na."

Tumango ako. "All right."

Declan got Chelca out of his car and carried her. Yumakap naman si Chelca kay Declan. Napangiti nalang ako.

"Ingat pauwi." I told Declan when he was about to leave after bringing me and Chelca safely home.

"Ciri... I know that we weren't really close before... Even if I'm also a friend of your brother. But we've been friends now, right?"

Tumango ako. "Oo naman, Declan. And you've been a good friend to me."

He nodded, too. "You might not trust me well yet... But you can always call me if you need a friend... or anything."

I nodded and I smiled. "Thank you, Declan. Same with me." habol ko pa.

Declan smiled and his handsome face lit up. Napangiti lang ako lalo at parang gumaan pa ang loob ko.