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Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten

Jealous


When I was younger I didn't really liked Declan Luigi Zamora. He's my brother's friend and I've known him since we were young. He's also the cousin of my best friend, Lorie. Palagi niya lang kasi akong inaasar noon at naiinis ako sa kaniya. While Ezion was the one who's friendly towards me. Kaya rin siguro sa kanilang dalawa ay kay Ezion napalapit ang loob ko...

Nakaawang pa rin ang labi ni Declan at hindi pa nakakasagot sa tanong ko. I asked him if he likes me. Later on I just gave him a sheepish smile. Dahil nakaramdam na rin ako ng hiya sa naging tanong ko sa kaniya. "Ah! Never mind. I'm sorry, sige umuwi ka na." At halos itulak ko na siya paalis. Wala na rin siyang nagawa.

I closed our condo's door and I closed my eyes tightly after. For sure I'll be feeling awkward when we see each other again at work. I sighed heavily. I think I'll just deal with it then. Wala na rin naman akong magagawa dahil magkikita at magkikita pa rin kami ni Declan. Alangan namang iwasan ko siya?

It was Kuya Caleb's birthday and we went out to a bar. Naiwan sa bahay sina mommy at Chelca. Si Ate Cianna naman ay humabol lang sa amin dahil may duty rin siya sa hospital. Nanlibre si kuya sa amin at sa mga kaibigan. Ezion wasn't there or my brother did not invite him. Siguro ay may galit pa rin sa kaniya si Kuya Caleb sa nangyari sa akin.

"Lorie..." Kinagulat ko iyon. I did not expect that I will see Lorie after many years without even communication. I mean yes it's still possible for us to see each other again especially that we're just in the same place now. Lalong hindi ko inasahan ang naging kilos nila ni Kuya Caleb sa isa't isa. Umawang ang labi ko.

Narinig ko naman na tumawa lang bahagya si Ate Cianna. "Kayo na?"

Napatingin ako kay ate. "What, Ate?" Naguluhan yata ako at hindi ko masundan ang nangyayari.

Nakangiti lang naman si Ate Cianna sa dalawa. I turned to my brother and Lorie again. They were both just smiling, too. Alam kong malapit na noon pa man hindi lang sa akin kung 'di pati na rin sa dalawa kong nakatatandang kapatid si Lorie. Also our parents liked her. Ang hindi ko alam ay sila ni kuya... Parang gulat o namamangha pa rin ako habang tinitingnan ang kapatid ko at ang dating kaibigan. Lorie's eyes and mine met. Natitigilan pa rin ako.

Later on we just enjoyed partying. Nandoon din si Declan kahit sina Architect Soledad. She was seated beside Declan. Habang nakaupo naman ako sa table namin kaharap sila. I looked away and I suddenly felt uncomfortable seeing how close they could get because they're seated just right beside each other. I sighed and decided na parang gusto ko nalang munang lumabas at magpahangin. I then excused myself from everyone. Bahagya pang natigilan sina ate at Declan. Nagkatinginan din kami ni Declan sandali.

"Where are you going, Ciri?" Ate Cianna asked when she saw me stood up from sitting beside her.

"I'll just call mommy to check on Chelca, ate." paalam ko.

Tumango naman si ate. I was about to leave when Architect Soledad added a comment. "Iba talaga kapag may anak na, 'no? Mabuti nakapag-party ka pa ngayon? Hindi ka ba hahanapin ng anak mo?"

Hindi agad ako nakasagot at natigilan pa. "No. Kasama naman niya si mommy sa bahay..."

Architect Soledad just nodded her head and turned back her attention to Declan. Na nakatingin naman sa akin. Pero tinalikuran ko na rin silang lahat.

Sa labas ng bar ay nag-isip isip ako. Do I regret having Chelca? No. Ang palaging sagot ko ay hindi. Especially the first time I saw my baby in my arms I was overwhelmed. I love my daughter so much. Kaya wala na dapat akong pagsisihan. Bukod pa sa nangyari na iyon at tapos na.

"Ciri?"

Nilingon ko si Lorie na mukhang sumunod sa akin. She gave me a small smile. I faced her. "Lorie..."

We were quiet for a while. "How... have you been?" I asked her first.

"I'm fine... Thanks." she answered.

It was a little awkward between us. Dati ang dami namin napag-uusapan at halos hindi kami maubusan ng topic. I remember how our friendship was like. Before we were very close. Until I just ruined it for Ezion...

"How about you? You're now working for Declan's company, too?"

I nodded. "Yes..."

Lorie smiled. "Mabuti naman... Hmm. Ilang taon na nga ang anak mo...?"

Bahagya na rin akong napangiti. "She's turning six years old. Oh! If you're not busy you might want to come. Ipaghahanda kasi namin siya ng party niya."

Tumango si Lorie. "All right. Thank you for the invitation."

"You're welcome."

Natahimik kaming muli pagkatapos. "Lorie," I called.

"Hmm?"

"I'm sorry..."

Maagap niya akong inilingan. "It's okay, Ciri. We were young back then. You were young. Alam ko naman noon na matigas din talaga ang ulo mo minsan, just like your brother." ngiti ni Lorie.

Bahagya rin akong napangisi. "You and my brother..."

Lorie sighed. "Long story..."

I just chuckled. We still have other time to talk about it. Nang magpaalam si Lorie na babalik na sa loob ay hinayaan na rin niya muna ako doon sa labas nang sinabi ko sa kaniyang doon na muna ako. She was replaced by Declan na mukhang kanina pa rin nandoon at hinintay lang kami ni Lorie na matapos mag-usap. Nagkatinginan kami nang makita ko rin siya at nakaalis na si Lorie.

"Are you all right?"

Hindi agad ako nakasagot sa tanong niya. Unti-unti akong tumango. "I'm fine. Uh..."

"You will still come with me to look for gift for Chelca's birthday, right?" Declan asked as if carefully.

Tumango naman ako. "Oo naman..."

Declan smiled after hearing my reply. Bahagya na rin akong napangiti. What I felt kanina noong nakikita ko sila ni Architect Soledad na magkalapit can probably be jealousy... Was I jealous, really? Do I really recognize? Am I recognizing my feelings now...? Am I sure? Bakit naman ako magseselos... Do I... have feelings for Declan...? It can't be... Why would I...

"Aren't you going back inside? Are you tired? Or you probably miss Chelca already."

Ngumiti ako sa sinabi ni Declan. "Hindi naman... Sasabay na ako kanila kuya at ate pauwi sa bahay."

Tumango lang si Declan. At mukhang sasamahan pa yata ako doon. Sa huli ay ako na rin ang nagyaya sa kaniyang bumalik na kami sa loob. Naabutan kong nakatingin na agad sa aming dalawa ni Declan na sabay bumalik si Architect Soledad. At mukhang nag-aabang din siya sa pagbalik namin. She looked at us until she just looked away and didn't say anything anymore. Ngumiti ako kanila kuya at sa mga kaibigan dahil na rin sa biruan nang makabalik ako. And this time Declan sat beside me at hindi na siya bumalik sa tabi ni Architect. And I feel good the whole night until we all went home as a conclusion to Kuya Caleb's birthday celebration.

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