I still recall Carl(my husband)'s face and how my five year old son Ben jumped about the house when they found out that I was going to have a daughter. I too was exuberant as I had always wanted a daughter so that I can dress her up and admire the view. There was only two months left for my due date and everyone was beyond excited. My husband bought me delicious and nutritious food saying that I should eat to give birth to a healthy and beautiful baby.
Months, days passed. I was admitted to the hospital. I was suffering so much from the timely contractions but Carl was always there holding my hand and making me at ease. Then, after a few hours, I was taken to the labor room. It was really hard but was bearable since I already had experience with my first child.
The nurse placed the baby in my arms but I sensed that something was wrong with my child. It was all written on the faces of the nurses. I looked around but couldn't find my husband. What is he going when he should be here sharing the joy with me?
Anyway, I looked at my daughter and admired how beautiful and cute she was. Then it dawned upon me....... Why was she not screaming or crying or doing whatever a sound a new born should emit? She was just staring at me with those big, round, blue eyes as if asking me "what's wrong with me?".
My whole body hurt but I stood up and went to the other room where I assumed my husband and the doctor was. There they were. I overheard what they were talking.
"But doctor..... What can I do? How can I tell my wife that her new born baby cannot speak?" I heard my husband's voice. What??? How is this even possible? She looked so angelic that I couldn't not even imagine her being dumb.
"I guess it'd be better if you talk with her now. However, we can't hide it from her any longer. She must be already wondering why there is not a single sound coming from the baby." That was the doctor.
"Doctor..... I have another question..... Will my daughter be like that for the rest of her life?"
This......I listened with eagerness. This was the question that kept swirling in my mind since I overheard their conversation.
"Well, that's a matter if time. I can't say anything for the time being. We'll have to see her development with the course time. You should be patient as the parents of a disabled and you should be ready for the worst. However, don't lose hope."
I couldn't stay there any longer. My legs couldn't keep me steady. I fell down........
"Oh my god Clarisse! What happened to you? Are you alright?" I must have fallen with a loud thud. My husband came running to me with the doctor. I felt like unconsciousness sweeping through me. It would be better if I was to die right away. I may be too sinful to become the mother of a normal child. Why? Why??WHY?? I let out a silent cry by myself.
Three and a half years have passed since that day. We named her Angela because now we have realized what an angel she was to our life, what an amazing gift she was from God. Me, my husband, Ben.... all of us accepted Angela as she was and what she she is meant to be.
My husband and I didn't lose our hope or faith in god. We kept trying everything possible to cure her and kept taking her to a speech therapist regularly even though every time we were disappointed to the brim. Well, there was nothing left for us to lose, so what's left for us was only our belief that someday she will start talking.
One sunny day we were in the backyard watching Ben and Angela enjoying themselves. How fortunate we were that Ben was an incredible brother who looked after his sister with great care...... We watched as Ben carefully placed Angela on the swing and rode her. Angela's dashing smile enlightened the entire yard. That smile....it was always on her when we were with her as if to say "Thank you for loving me" and "I love you too".
That day we were having tea in the backyard when Angela looked at me with her twinkling blue eyes. That look.... I have not seen it before. Her mouth started to twitch as if she was getting ready to say something.
"I love you!"
I couldn't believe my ears. Tears came sprawling down my cheeks. She actually spoke. She actually uttered those three words. I looked at my husband.
"I heard it Clarisse. I heard her." For the first time in my life, I saw a drop of tear glistening on my husband's cheeks.