[Buckle up Shadowlings, shits going to happen  and a lot of what's mentioned in the next two chapters is going to be important to remember when book 2 comes out. Also, part of this is me venting out my emotions because i feel like Deceit right now—]

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Deceit flinched a little as Remy helped him wash up. He felt so emotionally and mentally drained and had no energy to fight back. So he simply allowed the 'trait' to do as he pleased. The hot water felt good against his cold skin and he wanted to stay in the shower for as long as he possibly could. 

"Ssstingsss," Deceit mumbled, accidentally hissing his S's. The cuts from himself as well as what Remy had made on him during their 'session' were stinging badly from both the water and the soap. He refused to acknowledge how he now had 'Remy' carved onto his waist. 

"I know Denton, but I don't want your pretty little marks to get infected." Remy cooed, kissing Deceit's neck as he traced the carving of his name. Deceit shuddered in slight fear. It felt wrong, really wrong. Even his name felt wrong to hear and he used to take pride in how he had the same name as the reporter from the 1992 Newsies. 

Remy helped him out of the shower and wrapped a towel around him and smiled softly. Deceit returned the smile but it was fake. He allowed Remy to lead him to the bedroom and get him dressed despite the sick feeling in his stomach. A collar was clipped around his neck after the hoodie was placed on him. Then he was gently laid on the bed and tucked in. 

"Such a good boy for me, aren't you Denton?" Remy cooed. He kissed Deceit softly yet possessively. Deceit kissed back just a little and nodded in agreement. A good boy? he was a good boy? "Get some rest love. I'm going out with a few buddies and I'll be back later tonight. If you're not here when I return, you're going to be in big trouble." 

"Yesss sssir," Deceit replied respectfully. Remy pet his scales as a reward before leaving. He curled up under the blanket despite the pain and waited a while before quietly crying. Even after his shower, he felt so disgusting and lewd. He wanted Logan to hold him. He wanted Virgil to hug him and tell him stories like he used to. He wanted Remus to annoy him with disgusting facts and thoughts. 

But most of all, he just wanted to feel the love and comfort of the family he had to abandon because of Remy. 

Remus stop being around him. Virgil moved onto being a Light Side and recently, Logan failed to keep his promise. Hell, even the three dark boys whom haven't exactly been around as long as most of the others—Rage, Depression and Self Doubt—stopped hanging out with him despite their claims he was a fatherly figure to them. It was like all he could do was fuck shit up!

You'll never be good enough for them. Even Remy can't stand to be around you and he's your goddamn boyfriend! the voice in his head yelled at him. Deceit couldn't help but agree with it. You couldn't even break up with him without apologizing and giving into his glare. No wonder why he marked you up with your own knife!

Deceit curled in on himself even more from that and sobbed a little louder than he had meant to. He felt broken and used and like Death herself had struck him. He wanted to die and that scared him. Not because he was afraid to die (he wasn't), it was the fact he wanted to die that scared him. 

"Are you sure you saw Remy leaving here?" 

"Of course I'm sure! And I swear to every unholy being that I'm going to destroy him if I ever see him again!"

The voices in the hallway made Deceit slap a hand over his mouth so he wouldn't be heard. He didn't want Remy to get mad at him for people finding him. He shut his eyes tightly, hoping to go to wake up from this 'nightmare' and find himself in Logan's room in his arms.