a/n:: this is probably the darkest chapter I've written so far so,,, be warned lol
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❝i feel like im drowning,
you're holding me down and,
you're killing me so slow❞

constant, it was oh so constant, like a never ending cycle thats only purpose was to drive hajoon mad. he felt like he was suffocating everywhere he stepped.

it was harder to focus on work.

it took too much strength to talk to his friends.

his feet dragged with every step he took to get to school.

he was sinking.

sinking in the toxicity of what he once called love.

his friends noticed this, of course they did, they tried to help out. tried to distract him from the intrusive thoughts, woosung even went as far as doing hajoons work for him. but distractions wasn't what he needed, no.

what hajoon needed was solace. he needed to confront jaehyeong and tell him to just stop messing with my head. but even being around him felt too overwhelming. hajoon could feel jaehyeong a mile away, his senses were hyperactive around the man and being near him had hajoon drowning in his scent. he hated that fact so much. he hated this so much. he hated himself so. much.

but what could he do? he was trapped under a spell that he couldn't break. that wouldn't break.

his grades were dropping, his friends faith in him was slowly dwindling. hell, his family barely contacted him since this whole mess started. hajoon had a feeling dojoon told them about the ordeal. hajoon would be furious if he had the strength to feel any emotion anymore. he just felt weak. he was weak for letting that man control him so easily. he was weak.

weak.

weak.

so... so weak.

hajoon cried more times he could count that night. he didn't have the energy to fight it anymore. so he succombed to the want. he called up jaehyeong and let him have his way with him.

it felt good. but he knew it was only temporary.