Chapter 16: Happiness is What I Desire
"Opal? Opal, are you okay?" Auntie's voice seemed to be coming from far away.
Slowly, I emerged from the darkness of sleep and I opened my eyes. I was confused when the darkness persisted until I realized that my face was still pressed against the couch cushions, but as I turned my head the fluorescent lights nearly blinded my unadjusted eyes.
Swiftly I closed my eyes and groaned, rubbing them for a second. Tentatively, I opened them again and the light seemed to be gentler now, so I opened them the rest of the way and focused on Auntie's beautiful face. Her brown eyes were filled with concern and I felt a prickle behind my eyes. Auntie had always loved me, but she didn't know what I was. Once again I wondered if she would stop loving me if she found out that I had ruined her brother's life.
"Are you okay, Opal? Why are you sleeping on the couch? It's almost midnight."
"Midnight? Why are you back so late?" My voice was rough from being woken up and I cleared my throat.
"There is a new project that my boss put me in charge of. I kind of got lost in it and I missed the subway, so I took a taxi but there was an awful wreck so I was stuck in traffic for almost an hour."
"I'm sorry, Auntie, but I'm glad you got home safe," I said with sincerity and she smiled.
"Actually, I'm glad you were on the couch because I have something to ask you."
"What is it?" I asked, holding back a yawn.
"Well, this project is a collaboration with one of our sister companies and they want to send me to a conference in a couple of weeks. It's not far and they'll pay for a hotel and my boss said it would be fine if I brought you with me. So what do you say? Do you want to go to the beach with me?" Auntie asked with a twinkle in her eyes.
"The beach? Of course!" I exclaimed with excitement, my sleepiness vanishing. Auntie laughed at my enthusiasm.
"It's not for another two weeks, so right after your school gets out for summer break we'll head over to Coral Bay. We'll only be there for the weekend and I will have to work for most of it, but I promise to spend time with you too. And you can hang out at the beach when I'm at work."
"That sounds fantastic, Auntie. Thank you!" I flung my arms around her neck and squeezed her gently; I had always dreamed of going to the beach.
Auntie hugged me back and I could hear her chuckling quietly. As she held me I felt warm, happy, and content. This was where I was meant to be. Right here with Auntie. When I was with Auntie I could pretend I was a normal girl. I gave her an extra squeeze before letting her go and standing up to stretch.
"I guess I should go to bed for real." As I said that though my stomach rumbled so loudly both Auntie and I could hear it. Auntie stared at me for a second before bursting out laughing. After swallowing my embarrassment I joined in with her laughter and Auntie gave me a quick side hug.
"Sounds like a midnight snack is in order," she said with a grin and I smiled sheepishly back at her. I had skipped lunch and had fallen asleep almost immediately upon arriving home without dinner so it made sense that I was hungry.
Auntie urged me into the kitchen and we whipped together a quick pasta dish. Auntie cooked the noodles and sautéed mushrooms and onions together as I made a creamy parmesan sauce.
"So, are you worried about finals at all?" Auntie asked above the noise of sizzling onions. I shook my head, concentrating on pouring out the right amount of milk.
"Not really. All of my classes are pretty easy. I'm excited for my Shakespeare final. Mr. Tremont paired us off and we're going to act out a small skit from our favorite Shakespeare story."
"Oh, that sounds fun! Who is your partner?" Heat crept up my neck and into my cheeks and instead of answering I pretended to be absorbed in my measuring. "Opal?" Auntie asked and I bowed my head, trying to keep Auntie from seeing my warm cheeks. Auntie gasped then squealed with delight.
"It's that Lysander boy, isn't it? Oh, Opal how exciting! What skit are you doing?" I tried to hide my smile but it seemed to spread against my will.
"We haven't decided yet. Mr. Tremont announced the partners as class was ending. Lysander and I decided to come up with a couple of different options and then choose which one is our favorite."
"You should be Romeo and Juliet! Oh, that would be so romantic!" Auntie squealed with obvious joy and I rolled my eyes.
"I don't understand why everyone thinks Romeo and Juliet is so romantic. I mean, love at first sight doesn't make sense. These two foolish kids decide in the blink of an eye that they love each other and are willing to die for one another when they know absolutely nothing about each other except that they're supposed to be enemies and they find each other physically attractive." Auntie looked at me with horror.
"Opal, how could you not believe in true love?" she asked in horrified shock. I shrugged, feeling uncomfortable.
"I just think that love should be born from shared experiences and getting through difficult situations together. I don't think love is something so instantaneous." I turned back to my sauce thinking, Not that I'll ever experience that, but I made sure to keep that to myself. I glanced back and Auntie's expression had softened. She turned off the stove before coming over and wrapping me in a gentle hug.
"You are absolutely right, Opal. Love doesn't happen in an instant. But you also have to give your feelings a chance to bloom into love. Remember that."
Auntie's voice seemed heavier than usual and I wondered if she was thinking about the love that she had hinted at before. I waited to see if she would continue but she let me go, patted my cheek lightly, then took the sauce I had made and put it on the stove to finish cooking it. Disappointment caused me to frown slightly, but I didn't push Auntie for now. I hoped she would tell me one day, though.
The next day at lunch I was curled up on one of the soft chairs in the school library with all the Shakespeare plays I knew surrounding me. Hamlet, Macbeth, Merchant of Venice, Midsummer's Night's Dream, there were dozens. I glanced at all the books on the ground and on my lap and I sighed.
There were so many good scenes that Lysander and I could do easily but my eyes continued to wander over to the small book titled "Much Ado About Nothing" lying to the left of my chair. I picked it up and flipped first through act one, finding the first Benedick and Beatrice scene. I grinned as I read the witty banter between the two stubborn, headstrong characters. I jumped to act three and found the portions where Benedick and Beatrice believed that the other was in love with them. And finally to act four, scene one where Benedick declares his love for Beatrice and she, in turn, tells him that if he loves her, he will kill the man who dishonored her cousin. I closed the book and studied it.
Much Ado About Nothing had always been my favorite Shakespeare play. It was light-hearted but still touched on raw human emotions like love, betrayal, greed, hate, hope, and pride, yet even with so many horrible events, it still ended happily. I had always wished for something like that in my own life. That all the hardships I had gone through would eventually lead to a happy ending. I had given up on that wish long ago, but I still enjoyed and connected with this play. The bell rang and I quickly gathered up the books strewn on the floor around me, replaced them on the shelf, and walked towards World History, still holding onto the copy of Much Ado About Nothing.
As I walked into World History just before the tardy bell rang I looked to the back row where Castiel was sitting. He met my eyes and raised an eyebrow as if asking why I had cut it so close. I lifted up the small book in my hands slightly and he rolled his eyes which almost made me giggle.
I took my seat and class began. The teacher seemed determined to make it through the last two chapters in our textbook before the end of the school year. At the end of the period, he handed out a study guide that highlighted all the information that might be on the final, and I scanned it quickly, noticing that he was including a small section on the information we would be learning right up until exam day. I made a note to read through those chapters on my own before tucking it into a folder and gathering my books to head to Shakespeare class.
As I walked into class I saw that the few students that had come before me were in their pairings, looking through plays and trying to choose their scenes. Mr. Tremont was sitting in the back of the class at his desk and he was looking at all the students with obvious anticipation.
"How are you today, Kate?" I jumped and whirled around, clutching my books to my chest as I came face to face with Lysander who was giving me an amused look. My heart was beating at a shockingly high rate but I tried to ignore it and smile naturally up at him.
"I'm doing good. How are you Lysander?" He offered me one of his whispers of a smile and my heart slowed down so fast I thought it was going to stop all together.
Maybe I'm not so good, I thought to myself worriedly.
"I'm well. Have you thought of a scene we could do together?"
"Ah, yes, sort of." Lysander walked towards his seat in the middle row and I tentatively followed him, taking the seat next to him which earned me another almost smile.
"I've thought of a few as well. What were your ideas?"
"Well... There are a few that are obvious choices, and I'm sure you found one that will be perfect for us... but I keep coming back to the story of Benedick and Beatrice."
Lysander placed one elbow on his desk and propped his chin on his hand, giving me his complete and undivided attention. I blinked and swallowed hard, realizing that my throat had gone dry. Am I sick? When had that happened? I wondered.
I looked down at the copy of Much Ado About Nothing in my hands, away from Lysander's penetrating gaze. After clearing my throat quickly I brought my head up but opted to look at Lysander's shoulder instead of his entrancing eyes.
"Benedick and Beatrice have such a complicated relationship at first. Their wit and sharp tongues are legendary and their timing is impeccable. The only problem is that there isn't a scene with just the two of them that is long enough for our assignment. So, I thought we could take bits and pieces from different scenes and put together a story about how they grew to realize their love for each other..." I trailed off, waiting for Lysander to say something.
The silence seemed to stretch on forever and I hesitantly peeked up at Lysander's face. His eyes were gentle and both corners of his mouth were lifted up slightly. My breath caught in my throat and I froze, mesmerized.
"I also enjoy their relationship. And I've never played a character quite like Benedick. I would enjoy it, I think." I sighed in relief and smiled, feeling relaxed,
"Great. I plotted out what I thought would be the best passages for us to incorporate into our scene..."
The rest of the period flew by with Lysander and I pouring through the book, reading through entire scenes at times to make sure we knew how to portray the characters properly. When the bell rang we both looked at the clock with surprise.
"Good work everyone! Tomorrow we will all go to the computer lab where you will type up your scene for my review. Have a marvelous day!" Mr. Tremont called after us as we all left for our final class of the day. I waved to Lysander as I headed for Art and he inclined his head in farewell before disappearing around a corner.
In Art Ms. Kelly told us that our final would be partially based on our final project, a charcoal sketch that personified what we desired for the future. The other part of the final would be a written exam on the notes we had taken at the beginning of each new section. I looked at the large piece of paper in front of me and chewed on my lip.
What do I desire for my future? I wondered uncomfortably.
Violette was already applying confident strokes of charcoal to her own paper. I tapped my finger against the table for a little while but eventually got up and began flipping through Ms. Kelly's reference books for some inspiration.
By the end of the period I was no closer to an answer than I had been an hour ago. I replaced the books, trying to keep my frustration from showing. Signing my name on the back of my still blank paper I placed it with the others in the far back corner of the art room and left the room feeling discouraged. I walked slowly through the hallways, still trying to figure out what I truly desired from life.
"Hey Opal, I haven't seen you in a while."
I stopped and looked up at Nathaniel and his friendly smile. Suddenly an idea clicked into place and I gasped. Grinning widely I clapped my hands in excitement and Nathaniel's grin turned confused as he watched me.
"Oh, Nathaniel, thank you! I know what I can draw now!" His confused look deepened and I couldn't help but giggle. "Sorry, Nathaniel. I was a little stumped on what to do for my art final, but you gave me a great idea," I explained. He shrugged and smiled at me.
"I don't know what I did, but I'm glad I could help."
"You did," I assured him. "I'm going to go to the greenhouse. Thanks again Nathaniel! I'll talk to you later."
With that I dashed off towards the greenhouse, but as I walked past the streaming students leaving school for the day my gaze naturally went over to Castiel's tree. I was surprised to see that Castiel was already leaning against the trunk, ignoring the other students walking by him. Smiling slightly I peeked at his calm face as I walked swiftly to the greenhouse.
Shaking my head at my own silliness I opened the doors and looked at all of the plants that seemed to stretch on forever and I felt excitement for my idea fill me up again. I filled my watering can and walked up and down the flowers, stopping to commit certain petals or shapes into my memory. After I had watered them I found the list from my mysterious president and it simply said to add some fertilizer to the rose bushes and weed the marigolds. I happily went about my tasks, paying close attention to the delicate lines of the rose petals and the layers of petals in the marigolds. Even after my duties were done I continued examining all the flowers around me. After almost half an hour of study, I left the greenhouse, ideas flickering through my mind.
Before I left for home I stopped by the gym to see if the basketball boys were still practicing. I thought it was amazing how even though their season was only from the end of October to mid-March they practiced year-round to stay in shape. Peeking into the gym I saw the boys playing a game of scrimmage. I glanced around the bleachers and saw Iris on the third row watching closely so I walked over to her, trying not to let the boys see I had come in and sat down next to her while placing my backpack on the ground.
"What's the score?" I asked. Without even looking over at me Iris opened her mouth to reply.
"The jerseys are up by a basket and the next basket is the last of the game."
The team members in the scrimmage game were divided into five wearing blue jerseys and five wearing their usual workout shirts. I watched as Dajan snatched the ball away from Troy who was on the shirts team, and dribbled quickly down to the other end of the court. Brandon was right behind him and went to swipe the ball, but Dajan expertly dribbled it behind his back to his left hand and pivoted, making Brandon overshoot. Dajan brought the ball up and in one fluid motion jumped and shot towards the hoop. The ball sank through with a small swoosh and the jersey team all cheered. I stood up and clapped loudly which caused some of the boys to look over.
"Sato!" Troy called in excitement and bounded over to the bleachers. I walked down to say hi but noticed that Iris hadn't moved. Instead, she was trying to hide behind the chairs.
"Iris, come on. Let's go say hi."
"No way!" she yelped, crouching even farther behind the chair in front of her.
"Why not?" I asked, waving at Troy to keep him from coming up here.
"It's way too embarrassing!" she said and I blinked in confusion.
"Well... okay, but come down if you change your mind," I said and then walked down to where Troy and now Dajan and Brandon were waiting.
"Hey, boys, you're looking good out there," I complimented with a smile and the three grinned up at me.
"Thanks, Sato. Did you see that last shot? As soon as Dajan got the ball from me I knew it was game over," Troy said with obvious admiration for his captain.
"Oh, come on, I could have gotten it back if Dajan didn't decide to pull a ballerina move," Brandon retorted while shoving Dajan.
"Whatever man, you know you're just jealous." I laughed at the boys and their playful banter.
"So, how is studying for finals coming?"
"Ugh, don't remind me," Brandon groaned, wiping his sweaty forehead.
"Once you have your study guides let me know and I can hold a special study session and go through all the information with you," I offered and the boys agreed to let me know.
They all left for the locker room and I glanced up but didn't see Iris. I wondered why she hadn't stayed to talk to Brandon if she liked him so much. With a shrug I began the walk home, watching as the sun began to set over the horizon.
The rest of the week and a half I had before finals passed by in a blur of study sessions and my rehearsals with Lysander. Mr. Tremont had declared our version of the love story between Benedick and Beatrice pure genius and given us both an A+. I had loved acting against Lysander, who turned out to be as incredible an actor as he was a musician.
When the bell rang, signaling the end of this school year, the students cheered and rushed out of Art class. Violette and I exchanged phone numbers and promised to hang out sometime during our month-long break. As soon as she left though I grabbed my final project and rushed off to the student council room, hoping that Nathaniel would be there. Without knocking, I burst into the student council room and Nathaniel looked up from his place next to the file cabinet.
"Hello there, Opal," he greeted me kindly. I smiled up at him and stepped back, nervously fidgeting with the rolled up piece of paper in my hands.
"Hi, Nathaniel. Do you remember when I told you last week that you had given me an idea for my art final?"
He nodded while looking at the paper in my hands with open curiosity. Only barely containing my excitement I unrolled the picture so that Nathaniel could see it. His eyes slowly widened as he took it all in and I felt like I would explode with pride. Nathaniel reached out and took the picture from me and slowly sat down at one of the desks. I knelt down, placing my arms on the desk and leaning my chin on top of them in anticipation.
I had drawn a picturesque mountain meadow. There were flowers all along the bottom and in the meadow itself. A small waterfall trickled on the right side of the picture amidst some shadowy rocks. Fluffy clouds floating in the sky and on the left side, a young woman was leaning against a tree holding a flower up to her nose and smiling serenely, her hair being tossed gently by the wind. The charcoal gave the entire picture a soft feel of gentleness.
I looked up at Nathaniel, wondering if he would see what I had hidden in the picture. He slowly reached out and lightly traced the girl that I had drawn. He looked down at me and the wonder in his eyes gave me goosebumps of happiness and I couldn't keep the smile off my face.
"Is this you?" he asked, looking at the girl again. I blushed and nodded.
"Our assignment was to sketch what we desired most for the future."
"And you desire to be surrounded by nature?" he asked with a chuckle and I smiled.
"Not exactly. Look a little closer." Nathaniel looked again, this time not looking at the girl but at the scenery and then his eyes widened as he pointed at one of the clouds.
"Is that...?" I grinned broadly and he stared at the cloud that I had fashioned to look like his smiling face. "Why am I a cloud?" he asked and I giggled.
"Well, I couldn't make you out of flowers with your pollen allergy," I said seriously before giggling again. "I hid the faces of all my friends in the scenery. You're in the clouds, Iris is in the bark of the tree, Lysander is in the waterfall, Violette and Rosalya are in the flowers, Dajan is in the grass, and Castiel is in the rocks under the waterfall."
Nathaniel frowned slightly as I finished pointing out everyone. "Castiel is in here too?" he asked sulkily and I nodded.
"What I want more than anything in the future is to see my friends' smiling faces all around me," I said, then blushed and looked away. "That probably sounds silly, huh? Everyone else drew things like cars and diplomas and stuff."
I felt a soft pat on my head and turned to look at Nathaniel. His gentle smile seemed to be radiating warmth just like the sun. He patted my head once more and I felt a weird tingling along my scalp.
"I don't think it's silly. This is a beautiful picture, and I think that's an awesome wish for the future."
I don't know how long we would have stayed like that, me leaning against the desk and staring at Nathaniel while he patted my head in approval, but we were interrupted by the door banging open. I jumped in surprise and turned to face the door, finding myself staring into the irritated eyes of Amber Anderson.
"What do you think you're doing with my brother?" she asked menacingly.
"She was showing me a picture she drew, Amber. Calm down," Nathaniel huffed with obvious irritation. I looked at Nathaniel with surprise and glancing over at Amber I saw a similar expression on her face.
In the past whenever Amber had come up when Nathaniel and I were talking that meant our conversation was over, effective immediately. I'd never heard him speak to Amber in that tone.
Amber pouted with obvious annoyance on her face. "Nathaniel, come on, we need to get home! Daddy's waiting for us."
Nathaniel sighed, standing up and handing me my picture. I took it and noticed that he held onto it for just a second longer before letting me take it.
"Thanks for showing me this, Opal. It really is amazing. I'll see you in a month, right?"
"For sure. Maybe we'll even have a class together next year," I said with a hopeful smile. Nathaniel returned my smile but Amber started tapping her foot impatiently.
"I'm coming, Amber," he said, following her out of the room but sending me a small wave before he disappeared into the hallway.
I looked down at my picture and focused on Nathaniel's cloud face. The charcoal hadn't been able to make his eyes sparkle as they did in real life. Shaking my head quickly I laughed at myself, wondering where that thought had come from. I walked out with a skip, imagining all the wonders that awaited me at Coral Bay.
"Hey, Opal, wait." I stopped and looked behind me, wondering who had called my name. My eyes met Castiel's just as my picture was swiped from my hands. He flipped it open and looked at it with a critical gaze. "What's this then? A self-portrait?"
"Not exactly," I replied vaguely, wondering if Castiel would see the faces. Lysander came up behind Castiel and looked at my picture. He looked up at me and for the first time I saw surprise in his mismatched eyes.
"Kate, I didn't realize you were such an artist. This is extremely clever."
"You see them?" I asked with delight and he nodded, gracing me with his ghostly smile before pointing to the waterfall.
"This is me, is it not?"
"Yes! You found yourself!" I said happily.
Castiel frowned until Lysander pointed to the rocks next to his waterfall where I had hidden his face among the shadows. A small chuckle escaped from him and a half-smile emerged.
"Why am I a rock?" he asked and I raised one eyebrow.
"Well, why would a rock and roll enthusiast like you be anything but a rock?" I asked and he laughed.
"And a waterfall?" Lysander asked. I smiled while trying to keep from blushing.
"Your voice. It's calm and musical like a little waterfall."
Lysander's eyes lit up, making me think of stained glass. I looked away and took the picture gently from Castiel.
"I have to go now. My aunt and I are going on a business trip to Coral Bay and we're leaving in a couple of hours."
"Coral Bay?" Castiel repeated with a hint of surprise. I nodded mutely, wondering why he asked, but he didn't elaborate.
"Have a wonderful break, Kate," Lysander said and I grinned.
"I will. I'll see you two in a month."
I waved and dashed off, letting my excitement fill me as I headed for home.
A/N I wish I was actually artistic. I found the picture above on google. It was drawn by Ana Duyunova and she titled it "Spring field of flowers". Isn't it pretty? ^.^
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