It's the kind that feels like poison

And makes your soul howl nonstop.

When your blood boils and freezes alternately,

Sweating from rage,

Shivering in sadness,

Randomly throughout the day.

Your heart solidifies,

Then beats with a shock to the body.

Lungs slow to fill,

Struggling to expand

But quicker to deflate,

Gambling with your life.

When being in your own skin is suffocating,

Dying to jump out

Like a free corpse numb to the agony.

Every crumb of food becomes sickening

From your stomach unsettling:

Constantly flipping and twisting,

Until insides are done ripping

And have you gripping the bare floor.

When you're too tired to be awake,

But too restless to fall asleep.

Then you strike the balance

Of tiring from the battle of the mind.

When you no longer have nightmares,

Because every dream-

Even those unfair-

Are better than being awake;

And regardless of how much you slept,

You're never ready to open your eyes

To the world that's become a void.

You let the mind storm wildly

Just to tire you again,

Forcing your eyes to close out reality,

And escape into your new paradise.

Once and twice and thrice repeated,

From the early morning to early noon,

To realize nothing has changed,

Alone to face your pain.