The days passing since Draco returned had been graver than strange, he was everything, but himself and nothing turned the same. He was hiding something from me, similar to the last time he acted this way, yet as the strong-minded boy he lived to be, he refused share,

He shut me out completely, as if I wasn't visible to him anymore, nearly not to matter. He became distant in my sorrows, and even if he was here, he wasn't.

He didn't speak to me like he used to. He didn't look at me the same way — he was numb, and his quietness turned me vein, mad, crazy,

I needed him, more than ever since Luna's passing and Hermione's threats to cease me of life, even if he slept beside me at twilight, holding me close, his mind traveled, to places I was not allowed to come, and the coldness he brought became overwhelming,

I love him, more than the stars, the moon, everything in this universe combined, even further than a human being could ever understand, and I missed him,

I missed him so much, even if he was here, his body close to mine, his breaths flaming my skin, the boy I loved faded away in his misery, and there was nothing I could do to settle it,

I watched as he turned to face me in between the sheets, his pale skin lit up like porcelain, the blonde hair had grown longer, the dark circles underneath his enchanting blue eyes almost blackened,

His lips parted, a shaky breath released, " You should sleep," He spoke, quietly, eyes still closed, but even if he rarely looked at me anymore, he knew me, inside out, "Leiah, it's late, you need to sleep,"

My eyes rolled at his words as I tried to shift around, the crispy covers shrugged smoothly against my heated skin, " Don't do that—," He mumbled, halting my tries to turn away from him, a cold hand wrapped around my waist, stroking my skin gently,

" Do what?" I whispered, my mind drained in question, my soul empty, " Do what you have done the past week?" His eyes flayed open, piercing through mine, his breath ragged as nostrils slightly flared — I struck a nerve,

" What is that supposed to mean?" He spoke, sounding hurt by my act, brows furrowed in the moonlight slipping through my window, " Why would you say that?" I meet the eyes I fell deeply in love with, still staring intensely through mine,

I shook my head, sealing my eyes to avoid another argument, because that was all we seemed to be doing, argue, fight, bicker, and the ache in my heart, turned it vulnerable, had no strength in doing that anymore, " Nothing. I'm sorry, let's just sleep—,"

" No," He pushed, propping himself up on one elbow, still facing each other, " You clearly have something on your mind, " Draco's vocals accusing, his tone harsh, " Enlighten me, what am I doing exactly?"

I swallowed thickly, almost scared to speak of this, because I knew how sensitive the subject of him being distant has grown to be, how he deep within felt more than bad to be treating me the way he had, " It was just a stupid comment, I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything—,"

"Leiah," He endangered, making my eyes clock wide, " Tell me what's on your mind, right now," The breaths leaving his lips trembled, he prized that he'd hurt me, that something felt more than wrong between us. I blinked quickly, the twisting feeling swirled within as I sucked in a breath, " I miss you, that's all," His face fell, his eyes softened, but not even a second later, jaws clenched, brows furrowed,

" I'm right here," He nearly broke, doing everything possible not to show his cracking inside, " I'm right here," He cooed, freezing, strong hands moving to pull me closer. My head hugged to his chest as he stroked my back. His cold fingers caused goosebumps to trail his touch,

" Right where I'm supposed to be,"

" But your not, Draco," I snapped, my temper suffering to his lies, " You're here, but you're not here," I forced myself back, away from him, my spine heavy against the headboard as he glared at me, furious to why I kept pushing him, to why I couldn't surrender my annoying thoughts, " You don't speak to me anymore, you don't talk about anything, ever since you got back from visiting—"

" Shut up, alright? Just shut the fuck up," He breathed heavily, almost regretting yelling at me the moment he did. He sighed loudly, pushing himself off the bed. My eyes immediately flickered to his arm, noticing the scratches of his nails, the bleeding wounds of him fighting the mark my father had punished him with,

" You don't know anything, so can you just stay out of it?" He seethed, teeth gritted, his toned muscles flexing by the heavy breaths, the temper failing him, but I stayed silent, not kenning what to say or do at this explosion, " Just—,"

Draco stumbled back, getting dressed as tears pooled my eyes, the need for him arose as my mind twirled the fact that he was leaving. I was stupid, foolish. I should have done as asked, not questioning him when he clearly strained me from doing so, " Please don't leave." I whimpered, earning a guilty look from the blonde boy. He halted in his steps, hesitatingly holding in reach, and then, he left,

______

Draco Malfoy,

I slammed the door to my room shut, furious with myself. The hatred of my doings grew wild within — I hurt her, once again I hurt the girl I loved, and it drowned me, to cease her of happiness, to take that small little piece of heaven she still managed to keep following her best friends passing — I took away, and I hated myself for it.

But as the hatred grew, so did the reality of things, the truth made me anxious, fearful for what I knew was about to come, my time with her was up, and I all heard echoing throughout my head was my mother's words,

'' It's for her own good,''

'' She doesn't deserve this, ''

'' The dark lord is not to be trusted, Draco,''

'' You need to leave with your father and forget about her,''

I sought to do as my mother wish. I tried my hardest to stay away, to distance myself. I wanted to isolate myself from her for days, but she was irresistible — there was no possible way for me to leave her behind. I needed her, much more than she would ever need me, and there rested my problems because she would be able to live her life in peace if I simply did as the death eater's asked; she could live freely, without the chains of her past,

But also, without me,

My mind snapped, the constant battle of wanting her, needing her, craving her and for her to be safe shredded my every sense — my hands roughly forced everything holding on my desk off it, the sound of glass shattering, books dropping to the floor caused me to wince, but still I was numb,

I dropped to my knees. My fingers tugged my hair back as my chest caved. I had to leave her behind. I knew it was the precise thing to do because the thing I had done while being away, the deal I made with her father — I was too much of a risk,

Draco's flashback,

My father had told me exactly where to go, where to find Potter, the day the dark lord had requested his execution. It was him or her, and even in my wrongful mind, I would choose her.

I would always choose her.

The truth of her being a Horcrux chewed my mind. The countless times I had tried to solve another answer, then for me to take a life, but nothing else made sense — if her father were to find out about her, the deepest secret she didn't even know about, nothing would stop him from taking her away from me, from locking her up where no one could ever reach her, similar to what he'd done with the other objects holding his soul.

He would hide her and never let another human being near her, ever again,

And that was something I could not let happen; no one was to take the light in my life away from me, not even the dark lord himself,

The surroundings in the busy town crowded as I was making my way to the safe house — the safe place in the order that no one knew had been compromised.

The order was filled with imposters and people who would do anything to earn the dark lord's trust, '' Alohomora,'' I whispered, hearing the door open with a klick as I slowly shoved it broadly, the darkened hallway greeting me caused shivers to flee my spine,

And with every step that I took, further into the home of the Black's, my insides scorned me,

This wasn't me.

I'm not a killer.

I'm not.

But I had to be.

I had to do everything to keep her safe.

Because she, she was everything and only the thought of losing her was enough to be the death of me, it was drowning, not to have a choice in being a slayer, having the father of the girl you love working against you,

The tip of my wand brightened the settings as I stepped into the living room, and there he was. My eyes immediately snapped to the brown-haired boy, deeply in his sleep, not standing a chance against the forbidden magic I was deemed to use.

The chosen one, the boy who lived was now the boy I had to cease of life,

To be real with myself, this last minute before my life would shift in change — I never cared much for Harry Potter, he was nothing more than a circus, a show for the order and the headmaster to toy with, but suddenly I did.

I did care; the humanity within ached as I rose my wand, closing my eyes, swallowing thickly,

'' Avada Kedavra,''

______

Tears drained my cheeks by the thought of it, by the inhuman, horrible act I had completed, and she had no clue to what I had done, no understanding of what I did to keep her safe, but that was the way it had to be,

Because if she knew — if the girl my heart beat for identified the truth of my actions, she would leave me. She was too pure, too caring, too human, and I,

I was a monster, a ruthless murderer, a failure,

I didn't deserve her, and I never will,

I knew that.

_____

The day had come.

The day I dwelled to resent since I left my childhood home a few nights earlier. I was fated to leave her, and my life was to become a misery yet again. This morning I left a note outside of her door, knowing that she always walks into Luna's room the first thing she does every morning, to attend the plants her best friend had left behind,

I penned her to meet me, when the darkness had shredded over the castle, in the place I promised not to leave her, not knowing that today I would.

The reality of leaving hit me like a train at high speed.

I was leaving her.

I was devising the girl I love behind and the thoughts of not seeing her angelic face every day, not watching her as she wakes up, hearing those sweet, silent noises she made as she stretched her arms the instant her mind caught back to being, not to kiss those warm, perfect lips mine longed for, not to look deeply into her heavenly eyes whenever I craved to, not to hear her voice, not to have it calm me when I needed it to, not to be able to touch her, to feel her soft, heated skin on mine, to embrace the loving touch she always brought, not to feel my cold hands grow warm in hers,

How am I supposed to live without her? How would I ever be able to go a day of not seeing her, talking to her, hearing her,

How will I be adapt to the reality of leaving the one person that showed me true love and how caring for another should feel like,

I will die without her,

But I had to, rather that I live in an eternity of misery than that she is caught up in harm's way,

I was missing her before I even had her, so what does missing her a little more do,

_____

Leiah Riddle,

''

Love,

Meet me in the astronomy tower at nightfall.

D.M.

''

I read the note he had left on my doorstep, over and over and over again, repeatedly to grasp the meaning of his words, to understand why he needed me to meet him at such late hour, in the tower only bad memories held,

Following him, leaving me the night before, left me destroyed in my own mind, beaten to the furthest, — I started to puzzle the pieces of the last couple of weeks together. There was no secret in the truth of him darkening passing events, he was keeping secrets, and I had never been more intrigued to know what,

I trusted Draco. I trusted Draco with more than life itself, and yet the sinking feeling became lingering, the sense of disbelief chewed my bones as the fear of being hurt, betrayed caved me from within,

_____

I walked the stairs leading to the place I loathed, where all the hurtful remembrance placed, the anxiety caused my breaths to hitch, the lump in my throat coiled, my mind nearly crawling in the obliviation of not knowing what this was about, why he acted the way he did, why he closed me off as if I was nothing, why it felt like he was leaving me but still held near,

The look of the tensed back, clothed in his black suit brought impassivity to my beating heart, my veins rushed in warmth by the look of him, how he leaned against the railing, peering out over the dark night, '' Draco—,'' I whispered, looking around as I strived for my last step of the stairs, he flung around at the sound of my voice, blue eyes meet mine, '' What are we doing here, Draco?''

With Draco's back now leaning against the metallic railing, he shoved his hands into his pockets, looking at me as the nightly wind twirled his hair. He didn't answer; instead, he intensely watched every single inch of me,

For moments in silence, he kept studying me, head to toe, without a single emotion flashing his empty features, until he pushed himself off, taking hesitant steps closer, holding only inches away,

The scent of mint and cologne soared me as his cold hand gently stroked my chin, moving his fingers up to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, "Leiah—," He held, swallowing the fallen look of my face, " There is no easy way to do this, and if I would have thought this through properly, I wouldn't have asked you to meet me here tonight,"

Draco's words ached my heart, the vocals shredding in pain was enough for my eyes to pool, " But I can't do this, not without seeing you again," He said, quietly, brows furrowed, " There is no simple way out of this, out of the hell of a life we've been given, but you—,"

'' You lived to be my redemption,''

He took a shoe closer, pulling his touch away to wrap his arms around my waist, drawing me into him, '' I can never thank you enough for what you have done for me, darling,'' He uttered, placing his head on mine as I buried mine into his chest, the warm, calming chest that always brought me comfort,

" What do you mean, Draco? What is all of this about?" I arched my neck to peer up at him, the blue eyes I fell entirely for stared back at me, his eyes glinted in liquid, '' Draco, what are you—,'' He hewed me off, his hand pushed my head into his shoulder, holding me tighter than ever before,

'' I'm sorry for this. I'm so sorry about this, but you deserve better. You deserve more than I can give you. I can't risk you getting hurt in all of this—,''

I hauled back, pushing my hands into his chest, my face twisted in disbelief, brows furrowed, glaring at him and then, by that liable look coating his front — I grasped the truth, understanding that these last couple of days, with him acting strange, was him distancing himself from me, it was him creating space in his own mind,

He was leaving me,

My insides drenched in the sinking feeling, heart dropped, the tears I sought to hold back missed my bravery, '' Draco—,'' I breathed out through stutter, all the emotions I had buried, deeply inside came crashing down, '' Don't do this—,'' My voice broke, the vocals nearly inaudible,

'' Please—, you can't leave me,''

He held his breath, fighting the tears watering, not wanting to show any signs of weakness as he stepped forward again, feet closer, his hands cupped my cheeks, thumbs wiped off the tears that kept falling. He looked softly into my eyes, '' There is forever in those eyes, Leiah — our forever, you and me,'' He tried to hide his breaking voice, the chilly air danced around us,

'' You were the love I never saw coming, and I don't regret one single moment of this,''

I shook my head, refusing to believe the words he's speaking, withholding the truth I knew was coming, '' No—, No—, You don't get to do this,'' I sniffed, my chest heaving, '' After everything we've been through, you don't get to walk away, Draco—,''

'' You don't get to leave me—,'' I bursted, my lower lip trembling as I pushed him away, creating space between us, '' You promised, Draco. You promised never to leave me—,'' The sobs escaping my lips broke him completely, making paths of clear tears strolling down his pale skin,

'' I can't live without you, Draco—,'' I slapped my hand over my mouth, trying to muffle the cries, and even if I knew that this had to be the hardest thing for him to do, leaving the person he loved more than anyone else, I couldn't believe him, that after everything — he chose to walk away,

His jaws clenched as he tore his eyes away from mine, the hurt he's causing me broke his heart, ring coated fingers rushed through his hair, '' And you think I can live without you?'' He nearly shouted, making me flinch back, '' If you ever think this is something I chose to do, something I want to do —,''

'' I would never leave you if I had any other way out of this. But it's not—,''

'' Why?'' I whimpered, burying my head in my hands, falling to my knees as he noticed. He stalked over, kneeling right beside me, '' How can you do this, Draco —'' I sobbed, my body trembled. He didn't answer; he sheathed his arms around me, pulling me in,

'' You can live without me, and you will, because it's you—, it has always been you,'' He breathed into my hair, his nose stroking against the crook of my neck, his crook, the place he always strived to be, '' And I believe that we both knew that, even when we didn't,''

'' It has always been us, you and me,''

He cupped my cheeks, bending my head back to face him, '' You have a place, Riddle, a place in my heart that no one else could ever have,'' He hummed before hauling away, standing tall on his feet, stretching his hand down to reach mine,

'' Come here,''

And I did. I forced myself off the ground, with the little amount of strength I had left, slamming myself into his chest as he held me, one last time, and I held him back, with everything I had, because that's what he lived to me,

He was everything to me, my reason to still be here, to always fight another day,

He hugged me closer, taking each other in,

One,

last,

time.

Until he pulled away, tilting his head to look at me, '' I will come back for you, darling,''

'' I will always come back for you,''

Tears flooded, breaths shaking, my body wavering, '' Promise me. Promise me that you will come back for me,'' I whimpered, as Draco smiled shyly, pain flickered through his eyes, cupping my cheeks, his nose brushing against mine,

'' Out of all the promises we have made and broke — this will be the one I promise to keep. I will come back to you. I always will,''

'' I'm yours, till the end of time, never forget that,'' He glanced deeply into my eyes, almost getting lost in them before they flickered down to my lips,

'' And you are mine, mine, mine, and only mine,'' My face drained in the salty liquid as I nodded, my eyelids vein, my heart heavy, '' Hold on to that, that I am yours, and you are mine, exactly how it's supposed to be,'' With those words — I forced my lips into his, kissing him with everything I had, my hands moving to grasp his neck, tugging him even closer, holing him near,

Because this was it,

This was the end of our story,

Or that's what I sought to believe,

He smiled against my parted lips before kissing me again, one last time, '' Keep your eyes closed,'' Draco mumbled into my divided lips, and I did as asked. I had my eyes sealed, feeling his touch tending away, '' Just keep your eyes closed —,''

Draco's hands found mine, braiding our fingers together as I stood before him, eyes closed, my heart breaking within, '' I love you,'' He whispered, leaving a soft kiss on my knuckles, and with that — he let go,

The wind swirling around me, the sound of emptiness echoed louder than ever before,

I knew. I knew what just happened, and I didn't dare to meet the truth. I didn't want to, even if there was no other way,

I slowly opened my eyes,

He was gone,

Draco Malfoy had left me,

And my entire world shattered,

" It's ok to be brave. It's ok to leave, but words are just words unless you keep them,"

_____