Azure was next to Xian when they entered the VVIP room to watch the game together. There was no one else except them and all this was possible only because of Kiara and her connections.

"Are you sure you don't wish to go and meet your team?"

Shaking his head Xian sighed, "Not right now. They need to concentrate. I'll go once the game is over."

Checking his phone Xian was glad to see JC's message; "Miss you. Will win for you."

"JC?"

"Yeah! He's going to win this game for me!"

From where Xian and Azure were; they could see entire arena. It was a great spot with the only thing between them and the rink was an entire ceiling to ground glass covering the pavillion. An outsider could not see them. It was a perfect cover for privacy.

Jun could sense Xian's growing anxiety. He needed to calm the other man's nerves. Pouring a cup of coffee for them, Jun stood next to Xian and handed him the cup.

Grateful for this gesture Xian smiled and enquired, "How is it that you know exactly what I need?"

"Call it being a good friend." Azure's answer made Xian chuckle.

The game was about to start and his hand trembled. He really wanted to be there, with them, playing that game, but he couldn't. There was no one to blame but him. It was then Xian felt warmth against his palm as Azure threaded their fingers together and squeezed his hand with assurance.

At that moment he didn't feel alone. He had Azure next to him.

The start of the game was announced and both teams were in good form. Xian was proud of Zen. Having never had a chance to play before, this would be his big game. JC was a force to reckon with.

As the game progressed Xian became nervous. The other team were rough and did not mind scoring penalties if it meant hurting JC.

Fuck!

Jin was kicked and hit; but the way it was played wasn't offensive and thus they did not get any penalties. But Xian realised that this irked his team.

No guys! Focus!

The one to take maximum hit was Zen. He wasn't able to concentrate and by then the other team had already scored few goals.

"If he's unable to keep up, your team's going to loose."

Azure was right. The score was already 2-3 with the other team leading.

'Come on Zen!' Xian cheered as much as he could but even after two periods; his team was lagging behind. If they didn't score in the third period; the game would proceed into overtime.

By now Azure was quiet too and Xian didn't have the heart to disturb him. The start for the third period was announced and entire stadium waited with bated breath.

It was four minutes into third period when JC scored and tied the goal with the help of Jin's assist. It was now 3-3 and the entire stadium cheered; perhaps Xian himself was the loudest. As for Azure, he was extremely quiet.

"Come on! Just one more goal!" Xian yelled with his fingers fisting in his hand.

Seconds ticked by and Xian knew JC was exhausted. He could sense JC's minor injury in his ankle becoming bothersome. He just hoped his brother could stay strong until then.

The other team tried their best to push the game towards overtime but his team knew if that were to happen Zen won't be able to save any goals.

'Come on guys!'

Just when the horn was to blow, Victor shot the puck towards Jin who with all his power dashed through the defence, hit the puck to where JC was. Each and every eye was now on the forward and even with the defence barging in on JC; that man never stopped. He with all his might shot the puck and just seconds before the third period came to an end, he scored the goal and the buzzer went off.

The stadium was quiet and next moment, it shook and resonated with immense cheer. His team won! JC with Victor and Jin's assist won the game.

They won! JC had used the go-ahead goal technique.

Xian turned to share his happiness; only to find the other man's eyes were cold and distant.

"Azure?"

"Is it alright if I go back to the hotel?" Azure had his eyes fixated on the winning team in front of him.

"Sure. I can ask Kiara to drop me at the hotel and I'll meet you there."

Without another word Azure walked away with Sahara next to him and Xian felt certain void in his heart. He couldn't place what was wrong but at this moment his team needed him. JC, needed him.

With a deep breath Xian proceeded towards his locker room where he knew media was frenzy. The second he walked towards them, as expected they shot every question at him rapidly.

"Mr. Wei! Where have you been all this while?"

"Are you happy with your team's score?"

"Would it have been better if you were not barred?"

"Mr. Wei, is it true that you've been loaned to another team?"

"Mr. Wei; we heard that you have chosen an unknown destination to get back your game and spirit. Is it true?"

"We have that you're getting married. Who is that lucky girl?"

What? Marriage? Ignore them Xian.

"Mr. Wei, any comments on Mr. Zen Koi's performance? He was mediocre at best; wouldn't you say?"

Xian had to stop at that question. Looking squarely at the reporters eyes, he calmly answered, "I am proud of my team. They did well."

With that Xian left the paparazzi behind and walked towards the locker room, only to be stunned by Jack's accusations towards Zen. "How the fuck can you be a goaltender when you could not even save one goal!? If Xian was here-"

"Jack!"

The entire team at unison turned towards the voice that boomed around the locker room. It was Xian's.

"Xi-"

Raising his hand to stop Jack from speaking, Xian walked in and closed the door behind him. "I came here to congratulate you all and be a part of your celebration. Not to hear you comparing Zen to me. Remember, he's still a rookie."

Kneeling in front of JC, Xian placed a small icepack and spoke to everyone in the room; "If someone's to be blamed, don't you think it's best if it were me?"

"Xi-"

"If it weren't for my anger, this situation would not have occurred, but it did, and if you don't want to blame me on my face, then please don't accuse Zen either."

"No one is blaming Zen or you Xian." It was their Captain Jin who spoke. "And you're right. We need to celebrate! The win wasn't easy. Tonight's team dinner is on me!"

Cheering loudly everyone started changing to their causal clothes and walked out of the room. Next was Jack and as a gesture of apology, he placed a soft arm on Xian's shoulder and gave him a pat. JC was escorted by Coach Chen and it was only Zen and him in the room.

Zen was startled when Xian kneeled in front of him and started untying his Skates.

"Xian-"

"Let me."

The young player was quiet for a while while Xian went about to help him. It's was relaxing.

"They aren't wrong Xian."

Hearing the worried tone of Zen; Xian took a deep breath and sighed. "They aren't wrong; but they aren't right either. Don't blame yourself for this match; but at the same time listen to what Coach and Qiren have to share. They know what's best for the team and you."

Looking up at Zen; Xian smiled while the other nodded innocently.

"I need few minutes to myself." Patting Zen's head Xian left him to peace and walked out only to be pushed against a wall with brute force.

"The fuck!" Xian yelled when he saw it was Miron and his gang.

Miron was no longer the sweet man for whom Xian had feelings. In place of him, was now a bastard who only bore sinister smile. Next to him was Edik and Edmon; and just like that the past came back to haunt him; but Xian was pleased at himself for not showing them his fear.

"Cat got your tongue Wei Ge?" Miron walked seductively in front of Xian. "How about we play once more? This time you can let us all fuck you voluntarily."

Bile was churning in Xian's mouth.

Squaring his shoulders Xian raised his eyes and coldly rested on the men before him. "You think I would even want to touch idiots like you?"

Edmon took a menacing step closer to Xian who raised his hand to stop the former from being anywhere near his proximity.

"You raise one finger at me and that would be the end of all your careers." Turning to look at Miron; Xian addressed him with jest, "Didn't I warn you before not to approach me or is it that you can't get your thumb sized pen*s up without my ass to fuck!?"

Miron blanched and Xian grinned at the man in front with contempt. "As I thought. Aren't these guys fulfilling your desire or is it that you just like to fuck around with guys who don't give you their consent?"

"Xian-"

Turning coldly towards Edik; Xian scoffed, "You are not worthy to take out my name. None of you assh**es are. Fuck off now."

Saying his piece of mind Xian was just about to walk away when he turned and grinned at them lacing his words with threat. "By the way you all might want to get yourself tested."

His words had the desired effect.

"What a... are you insinuating?"

"Just that when you enjoyed assaulting me, not one of you stopped to even realise that you were sharing eachother too. Fucking me without protection was probably your worst ideas. The doctor hasn't give me a clean chit yet... so..." Xian let them fester as he walked out from there, but once he was out of sight, his feet did not stop until he got into a cab and rode all the way to Azure and his hotel room safely.

The moment he knocked and Azure opened the door, Xian let go of all pretence and pulled Azure into an embrace.

The other man was quick to reciprocate and it was only after few heartbeats that Xian let go off the man in his arms and looked into the room. By the entrance was Azure's bag and Xian looked back at him questioningly.

"I wished to go back home today."

"Why didn't you tell me before? I would have packed my bags too!"

Taking a step back Azure answered, "I assumed you would stay for the after party."

Xian started packing his bag right away when he replied without second thought, "I came with you. I'll leave with you."

Azure was surprised. He hasn't expected this from Xian.

Once Xian was ready; they checked out of their room and as Azure made Sahara feel comfortable, Xian shot a message to JC and Kiara; "Hi, Jun and I are heading back home. I'll facetime you two tomorrow. Enjoy!"

"Ready?" Xian enquired and Azure nodded softly.

Xian knew something was bothering Azure. He wanted to ask; but knew when the time is right; the other man himself would share it openly. All Xian could do was wait. And he will. Just like Azure did for him.

Trigger Warning

"Mr. Lan-"

"What have you done?" Jun whispered, still unable to believe what he had just heard.
"Why didn't you just kill me? Why did you let me live?"

"Wangji-" Uncle Lan tried to speak when Jun cut him off, "Why? Why am I alive?"

"Wangji-"

Lashing out the contents on the small table in front of him, Wangji yelled for everyone to hear his pain, "Wouldn't it have been better for me to die than live like this?"

"Wangji-"

"No! How can I live like this? Look at me!" Pushing his blanket away, every single pair of eyes were on his amputed leg. Feeling only wrath, Wangji roared out in pain, still unable to come to terms that he no longer had a leg, no longer could play the sport he loved.

Everything was ripped away from him! It was all gone! He couldn't live like this. No!

Unable to see Wangji in pain, Chen came forward to hug his brother tightly. And even though Wangji cried his heart out, he still couldn't push his brother away.

From then on each day became traumatic for Wangji to even survive. No one other than Chen and Uncle Lan knew of his condition and he preferred it to stay that way.

Every breath was difficult and after that first day where he lashed out, Wangji still hadn't come to terms with legs. He refused to acknowledge the truth and except for searing phantom pain reminding him of his loss; Wangji never once looked down. But he couldn't go on living like this either. He needed to put an end to his wretched pain.

Then one day he found means to end his life like a cold blooded murder.

A surgical scalpel was resting on the nurse's tray. Subtly hiding it below his blanket, he waited for the perfect opportunity; and he found one too soon.

It was summer night. There was no one next to him as Wangji glanced at the moon reflecting in his room. Would it hurt if he just stabbed this scalpel in his heart? Would it feel good to see his life drifting away?

He wanted to apologise to his brother and uncle. But, he knew no amount of apology will be ever enough.

Resting his back against pillow, Jun smile at the memory of his last match. His last victory. Frowning at the pain he felt against his wrist the only words he could reminisce as life seeped out was;

In a world where one feels distant,
Even his own life feels turbulent.
If there is no hope nor love,
Words of goodbye would never be evident.

"Azure?"

Jun woke up with a start. Feeling distorted he looked around to find Ice's concerned gaze on him and Sahara whining from behind.

"What happened?" His voice croaked and Ice gave him a bottle of water to drink.

He was shocked when Ice cupped his face and caressed his cheek to wipe the tears out.

"You were crying." Ice did not question him further and Jun was glad for that. "We are home."

Home.

Jun looked around and mechanically patted Sahara's head. Opening the door; without another word he got out and repeated the motion for Sahara too. When he was about to pick up his bag, Ice caught hold of his hand.

"Go to your room and rest. I'll get these bags for you."

Jun proceeded as per Ice's command and it wasn't much later when he heard a knock at his door.

Ice was standing there with two bags in his hand. Ice's gaze were steady on Jun as he stood there motionless at the threshold. What either of them expected no one knew, but Jun listened to his heart.

Taking a step forward he pulled the other man into a soft embrace. A second later he heard the bags fall and now the rolls were reversed. Ice banded his arms around Jun; and for the first time in many years, his heart too felt wanted.

A Go-ahead Goal:

The goal that puts one team ahead of another after the game has been tied.