A/N : Hello readers, time for a REALLY long chapter (long by my standard, you can imagine!!) but hopefully by the end of it, you will not be as confused about what's going on with Nandini & Manik! Yes, this chapter will answer quite a lot of your questions, since it houses a long confrontation between Manik & Nandini! 

Also, this chapter marks the end of my unsponsored attempt at marketing St. Regis ;) Yes, this is the last chapter based in Maldives, we will move on touring another part of the world in the next chapter! :) Hope you enjoyed your virtual Maldives tour ;)

No more chit chat, happy reading & see you on the other side :)

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Vommuli Island, Maldives circa 2018

(Iridium Ocean SPA Center, The St. Regis, Maldives Vommuli Resort)

Nandini Murthy

"Nandu, come now don't run around! I am going to ensure that I put this mustard paste on you before anyone else! Once I get you married to Arya beta, I will breathe in peace" chirped my aunt very dramatically as she ran after me trying to plaster my face with the paste she had in her hand.

"No chahchiiii" I yelled as I laughed and ran around the place with her in toes. However, if the beginning of the ceremony was any precursor, than today was so not my day, and I realised it when Navya teamed up with my aunt & caught me from the other side and my aunt victoriously approached me and transferred all the paste she had on her palm, on my face!

"Ewww" I heard Abir's voice & quickly turned to see my li'l guy scrunching his nose showing disgust at the horrific state it left my face in. I showed him the tongue and quickly slided the paste off my cheek and plastered it back on Navya for good luck.

"Guys calm down, don't you rowdy Southies turn my arrangement into a fish market!" Priyank's annoyed & grumpy voice soon reached our ears & Navya, my aunt & I quickly giggled and made a dash. The ceremony started with applying the paste on Abhi & then the same bowl of paste was to be applied on Mukti by her family; once the actual ceremony was over with food & sweet delicacies & blessing for the couple, the rest of the guests finally laid their hair down to play the 'Mustard Holi' for fun! There was a saying that whoever gets plastered with the mustard paste right after the bride, is the next in line for her wedding, hence Navya & my aunt were after me, they were trying to leave nothing to chance now! Ayappa, bless them with better ideas!

Right after the ceremony, Soha & her entourage of assistants took Mukti away from the venue to start getting her wedding trousseau in place, while the rest of us hung out to have fun. Aliya was having fun running after Dhruv with the paste, Navya was of course after my life while Harshad was busy managing Abir, since all the running around with mustard kinda freaked the li'l guy out; I looked around for Arya and soon saw him discussing something animatedly with Dufus. I smirked evilly, as I approached him, muttering, "Mr. Aryaman Khurana you are so dead today".

I quickly grabbed a bowl of mustard paste & added some rose water to it, to make it a bit runny and tiptoed behind my prey; from Dufus's expression, I was sure, he had caught me, but he was keeping the charade on & keeping Arya focused in his conversation, but his lips twitched to a small smile now. My brother knew what I was up to!

"Yes, one more amazing feature of cryptocurrency is..." Arya was about to enlighten the world with one more boring detail of his new obsession, virtual money, but before that could happen, I promptly emptied the whole bowl of runny mustard paste on his head! There was pin drop silence in the next few seconds that followed as Arya froze & unfroze to realise what just hit him. Then without even turning around & royally ignoring my brother's ridiculous laughter, he yelled aloud, "Nandini Murthy, now who will save you from me?"

That was it. I didn't need telling twice as I made a dash from there so that Arya couldn't catch me. If he did, I knew I was a dead duck, he'd probably get a pool of mustard paste made and dip me right into it!

"Aryaaaaa NO!" I kept shouting until I hit something hard..Thwack..err someone I think.

"Nandu, what's wrong with you?" I heard a super annoyed voice. The said voice never liked anyone screaming. Again, a small similarity from the past days, it brought a smile on my lip.

Manik.

"Manik save meeee" I screamed again and he shut his eyes in dismay, as I quickly ran & hid behind his huge frame. He was quite a cover, I couldn't see anyone from the other side. Thank you for sending this giant on time, Ayappa!

Until then I could hear Arya's hurried footsteps coming towards me, but that suddenly stopped. That is when my rationality hit me. Seriously, I was running from Arya & I chose Manik to hide behind? In a room full of people who knew our complicated history? Ayappa, what's wrong with me!

Sh*t.

I quickly came out of hiding from behind Manik & peered at them. They both were facing each other, and looking each other in the eye. I could feel there was no hostility there, but they were definitely not fond of each other, even now. Ayappa, you are so damn evil. Hmph.

"Hey Manik" I looked at Arya, as he tried greeting Manik with an amicable smile.

"AK" Manik acknowledged his greeting with a stiff smile. I glanced at his hands, he had fisted his palms with such force that his knuckles turned white. What problem did this man still have with Arya? College rivalry, seriously? The same Aliya they had fought for was happy with Dhruv, Arya was in love with me & Manik happy in his high profile life with Soha, so what was their f*cking beef, man!?

"Umm guys, let's go for lunch, we've got to wrap this event early since the wedding is due in no time!" I quickly intervened to bridge the awkwardness & both of them looked at me.

"I was going for lunch, until you ran into me & screamed for help to save you from AK" Manik replied back with a smirk. Why was he being such a jerk, Ayappa? Adding insult to injury! For one moment it felt like nothing had changed & we were back in college & I was where I always was, right in the middle of Arya & Manik!

"My fiancée doesn't need saving from me, Manik. Unlike some, I don't hurt the people I love" retaliated Arya with a fake sweet smile. I was nervous to say the least, why was their cold war breaking out here, now?! We were all going separate ways in a few days to come & these both did really well in avoiding each other so far. Hell, they even survived the boat ride together in the morning without killing each other, then why now, Ayappa?!

"Fiancée and all, congrats man!" Manik replied a bit playfully, but his voice lacked warmth, & he totally ignored Arya's jab.

"Thanks man, I've been lucky in life that way!" Arya tried rubbing on Manik. I almost laughed humorlessly. Arya really thought Manik cared, he was living in a fool's paradise then.

The only silver lining to this strange interaction was, Arya had forgotten all about his mission to plaster turmeric on me. Little mercies! As Manik, Arya & I turned to walk towards the lunch area, I caught Navya staring at me while feeding Abir from a little far, she looked at us disapprovingly & I sighed. I turned my gaze to spot Aliya looking at me too, but she had a happy daze in her eyes; as bizarre as it may sound, but Aliya of all people was the only one who sort of really understood my spot, and I think even secretly rooted for some miracle to happen to get Manik & me together. Although I want no such thing!

Vommuli Island, Maldives circa 2018

(The Grand Reception Hall, The St. Regis, Maldives Vommuli Resort)

"Ek phool Do Mali did you by chance watch that movie, Nandini?" I shut my eyes in acute irritability hearing the unmistakable annoying voice of Cabir Dhawan. Why Ayappa?!

"No, I haven't Cabir!" I replied, bored.

"So much attitude! That's why I like Soha, she is nice to me" he mumbled, knowing full well that he was irritating me.

"Shut up, Cabir" I hissed as I focused back on the stage where Mukti & Abhimanyu were currently seated & the priest was setting up the pyre for the ceremony to commence. Mukti was looking breathtakingly beautiful & happy. A small sigh escaped me, I knew in the near future, I'd be in her place with Arya by my side, but would I be half as happy?

"Hmm..I think you'd look as beautiful at your wedding if not more; send me photos when that happens, since I mostly wont be there to attend it" Cabir spoke again, as though reading my thoughts. That guy. Arghh. I rolled my eyes.

"Good to know that you're not expecting an invite either" I replied back to piss him off.

"Not expecting an invite, how'd you ever get married without the best man in the wedding? I was just worried, it'd be a Tamil wedding ceremony & would happen at the crack of dawn, so chances are I will have overslept & missed" he replied indignantly.

I glared back at him, "Since when did you become Arya's best friend, that you'd be best man?" I snapped at him.

"Woah, chill it ninja! When did I say AK is my best friend?" Cabir asked me back with his hands up as guard, as he looked at me incredulously for a moment & before I could ask him what he meant, he was back with his mysterious lopsided smile & walked away towards the stage.

That weird, creepy, psychotic nut job. Arghh!

I diverted my mind from that freak & turned to look around. My family can be really dramatic if they wanted to be & this wedding was proof. The wedding ceremony had begun; Aliya was standing behind Mukti, helping her move when needed, adjusting her veil so that she could see, she was Mukti's unofficial 'maid of honour'. I was the official one, but with our equation being mostly fake & formal so honestly I didn't bother. My bestie Aliya was merely filling in for me. Where would I be without her! My uncle & aunt were looked radiant as they sat beside the bride & groom with huge grins adorning their faces; next to Abhimanyu sat Mr. Malhotra, looking happy & proud and a little behind him sat Mrs. N trying to stifle her yawns with polite smiles. I giggled, seeing my neurotic relatives, everyone was trying so hard to represent the perfect family image here. Although if it were really perfect, Manik, Soha, Rooh, Arya & I should have also made it to the frame, but that's where reality disembarks the ideal, my friend.

"Hey love, I cannot tell you how beautiful you're looking today" I heard a husky whisper & raised my eyebrows; it was Arya alright but why was he talking like this? We were never really..you know..we're not really into much of these. I quickly turned around to face him and before I could ask him, he gently clutched my face between his palms & placed a soft kiss on my forehead. I blushed slightly & looked at him. His gaze was on me, his soft eyes shone with expectation; maybe he was waiting for me to reciprocate? Well it won't be the first time..but then I really thought about it. It was different now, I had found my closure from my heart break now, Manik had healed me, right? Then why should I not be able to reciprocate to Arya if I tried? I was unsure & to be honest unwilling too, but I remembered how Arya has always been my one true rock, I figured for him I should give us an honest chance now.

"What happened, Nandini?" he asked softly, still looking deep into my eyes. I let out a deep breath & was about to answer when my eyes fell behind him & what I saw really put me in a spot.

Manik was standing there, wearing a simple indigo kurta & looking the least dressed & most breathtakingly handsome man in the entire hall; he was looking straight at me. His expression was unreadable, but his stare was firm. Not even for giving us privacy, did he bother to look away. His eyes were somehow challenging me. I felt conflicted to be in the arms of Arya with Manik watching me. Was it fair? No. Should I feel guilty? Hell no. Then why Ayappa?

"Nandu?" I heard Arya whisper again & looked at him. He looked hurt. Did I miss the window of opportunity to show some affection and stop his heart from aching? Ayappa, why was my life so damn complicated!? No, I wasn't going to let Arya feel low. I was committed to him, I was engaged to him, I was his & he had the right to me even though he never enforced any. In that moment I did something thinking I was doing right by Arya, but that moment changed the entire course of my life thereon.

Ignoring Manik's challenging stare, I looked at Arya and smiled warmly. I intended to tiptoe on my feet & kiss him on the cheek and surprise him, but as I pouted and advanced towards him, Arya seemed to misread my gesture & advanced towards me.

Our lips locked for a few brief seconds.

I felt time had stopped. Not in ecstasy but in shock. It took me ten nanoseconds to come out of the brain freeze and register what was happening! Aryaman Khurana was kissing me on my lips. He was softly pecking my lips showing me all the love he had for me in his heart. This wasn't the first time we were kissing, and whenever we did kiss, I was always reluctant & indulging him; I never initiated our kisses - but today was different, his kiss scorched me, it charred me, I repelled from inside. Was it his kiss or was it due to the pair of eyes staring at me from behind him - I didn't know what was causing me this immediate repulsion. I wanted to break free & run, but my feet weren't moving. I was feeling a myriad of emotions & what was coming out strongest was guilt. Why Ayappa!?!

"Ahem ahem, you could have waited till the night, or gone over to your suite for that matter" Navya's delighted teasing voice reached my ear & I took the opportunity to pull away. I looked at Arya from the corner of my eyes, he looked dazed. I quickly turned to glance at Manik, but I could only see his retreating figure, walking out of the hall, shoulders hunched. It stung.

Navya kept teasing us, while Arya gently held my waist & blushed, but I had no idea what she was saying, my heart & mind had gone out with Manik & all I cared about right now, was to go & explain it to him that this was accidental. I know I shouldn't worry about it, right? What did Manik Malhotra care about? But the point is, I did. Hence I needed this out of my system. I was agitated & was thinking of quick ways to escape from there & follow Manik, but sound found Navya's iron grip on my wrist. I looked at her questioningly as she came close, feigning to fix my earring, as she spoke.

"Don't even think about it Nandu. I saw what happened. Stay here. Let Manik go" it was a command. For the first time in my life I was mad at Navya. I wanted to push her away & run, but a more rational part of my brain chidded me for it. Navya was right, she was looking out for me. This right here was where I should be & I am. I glanced at Arya, he was now looking ahead and watching the wedding ceremony unfold with a smug look on his face.

I am healed now, there is no room for anyone else here.

Vommuli Island, Maldives circa 2018

(Private beach, The St. Regis, Maldives Vommuli Resort)

Let me tell you, whatever you do, do not wear a gaudy Indian 'lehenga' with stilts and try walking on the beach. It is excruciatingly difficult & harassing in more ways than one, but at that time I didn't care. Trust me I did try to stay in my present & enjoy the moment, the wedding, the presence of my friends & family and witnessing my brother's wedding ceremony, but I couldn't. Ever since Manik walked out of that door, I felt time has slowed down for me. Every second felt like a milenia & after one hour, when I couldn't take it anymore, I hatched a plan & dropped some drinks on my dress & left the venue to clean up. I needed to meet Manik right then. I had no idea about what I wanted to tell him, whether I owed him an explanation, even whether he would care enough to demand an explanation or not, I just needed to see him. The urge was stronger than my sanity & eventually I gave in to it. I didn't care what Navya would say at that point, nor did I think about Arya, hell I didn't even think about self preservation, my heart just chanted one name & that was Manik Malhotra.

I didn't even care to actually clean my designer clothes that I had purposely stained, I just followed my heart & my feet led me to the beach searching for him. It felt like my heart knew where Manik was - anyway ever since we met, the sea beach had played a pivotal role in getting us close, so it was befitting that I spent the last evening on this island here, with him, talking about 'us'.

After walking, tripping, and trudging for fifteen minutes, I could see the silhouette of a man sitting on the sand with legs stretched towards the sea, the waves gently kissing his feet. It didn't take me any longer to recognize him, it was Manik. As I reached him, he didn't turn around; I don't think he even realised I was standing there. He was lost deep in thoughts. I stared at his beautiful but stoic face for a couple of minutes standing there quietly. Our hours were counted now, and once he turned around, I didn't know which direction our conversation would go, but in this moment, I realised I was making my last peaceful memory with him, the last one before I left from here.

A small sigh escaped me.

"Why are you here, Nandini?" I was startled to hear his voice, from when did he know I was here?

"Manik" I whispered his name softly, without knowing what to say next. He slowly craned his neck up to look at me. Our eyes met & I gasped. His eyes were calm, glassy & vacant, they looked dead.

He looked dead.

A deep realisation hit me, despite all the happiness he had in life, Manik Malhotra was as dead as me.

The question was why.

"Manik" I mumbled again, still not sure what to say, but at that point I realised I needed to keep the conversation flowing, that's the only way I'd get to hear his soothing voice.

Manik was looking at me with rapt attention but his face was devoid of any emotion, for the life of me, I didn't know how he'd react the next moment. Slowly he raised his hand and clutched my wrist and gently tugged at my hand motioning for me to sit next to him; I sat down softly next to him, he was now looking straight into the sea, he looked oddly composed; but I wasn't calm, in fact I was anything but calm, I was fidgety to the point of neuroticism.

"Where do we go from here, Nandu?" I heard him ask me after what felt like an eon easily. I heard his question alright, I knew what he was asking, but I wanted to run away from that question, the unpleasantness of it, the finality of tone, this topic had. This was the last thing I wanted to discuss before I left, but honestly, hadn't we reached that last moment already, wasn't this that very moment? No Ayappa, please buy me a few more breaths?

"Manik..woh..actually what you saw back there, it was..it was not how it..I mean we did kiss, but I wasn't err..planning to kiss him..umm on the ..you know that right? It was a momentary accident" I managed to spill the lowest quality of rubbish there ever will be found, before him. I didn't know what exactly I wanted to tell him. Did I want to clarify that I didn't mean to kiss Arya? I wasn't answerable to Manik for kissing my own fiance, damn he didn't even ask for one. Did I just want him to think I have never been with any other man? What good would that do, considering he knows I am marrying Arya & hell he was f*cking married, also he probably thought no less about my physical proximity with Arya, why'd he imagine I'd have issues going close to him? Did I say this because I just want to utter some nonsense, actually any nonsense to stall the existential question he put my way? I didn't know anymore.

"I am no one to question you on that Nandini" I heard Manik reply amidst my hyperactive brain running a show of its own. A sigh escaped me. How many more brutal attacks could my heart take before it decided to stop beating, Ayappa? I mean, Manik said what I thought he'd say & I was right, it, our kiss, didn't affect him at all - why was this breaking me down further? I chose his friendship to make happy memories to last right, then why was this last moment with him choking me to death?

"I don't have the right to question any of your actions, Nandu, yet I f*cking want to. Why are you such a riddle, Nandini Murthy, why damn it?" I stopped breathing when I heard him again this time. I thought he didn't care, but..but..he does?

"Manik, I think we are way past justifying our logicless, irrational behaviour & expectations from each other by now. There are things we cannot do anymore, things we cannot say to each other, but we do. I mean, me kissing Arya before you shouldn't feel like a crime to me, not because that's the normal, but because I have enough legit animosity against you, in the past to not give a f*ck about explaining anything to you, plus not to mention he is my fiance, we have that right over each other. I owe you no explanation Manik, yet it feels f*cking shitty to be kissing him, it feels f*cking shitty to see you witness it, I felt like crap when you didn't react to our kiss & asked for no explanation too. I know Manik, again, that's the right way, you are happy in your life, you shouldn't care & of course as you said, you're in no place to question me, but why f*cking then do I still expect that you will question me, Manik? None of this is normal, rational or legit, but we do it around each other Manik." I didn't realise when the first drop of tear cascaded down my eyes, I didn't even know whatever I said, it made any sense to him or not, but today I wanted to talk my heart out & tell this guy once and for all where I stand in life.

I slowly looked up at Manik and he was looking at me with unfathomable pain in his rather red & dry eyes. I could sense his perturbation, his face still managed to stay blank. There was a war going inside him & I didn't know what outcome I wanted out of his internal turmoil - what was good for us, who knew?

Manik turned his torso further towards me & gently cupped my cheeks, I could feel the hard grains of sand that were rubbing off on my face from his hand; hands that were previously on the sand. He gently wiped away my tears and looked at me for a few seconds, up close. He was so still that had one not carefully noticed the rhythmic heaving of his chest validating that he is breathing, one would think he was a statue carved out of stone.

"Nandini Murthy, if we acknowledge this unknown right we have long since given each other, then I'd like to exercise it now & tell you this; I hated seeing you with AK from the moment he set foot in your life all those years back. After so many years, one would imagine that feeling would have died, but it didn't Nandu. Even after all these years when I first saw you with AK & Abir, I really thought you guys were a happily married couple with a child. The thought riled up everything unpleasant in me Nandini, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't accept it, f*ck I couldn't even show my disapproval, what right did I have on you? Every time I saw you with AK, I felt an unpleasant side of Manik Malhotra, the one I buried six years back, making his presence felt inside me. I have been fighting with myself ever since to keep him away, put him off to sleep, he has no place in our lives anymore Nandu, but he wants you & he cares about nothing else, none of the people who I have built my new life with. I have been fighting to keep him at bay Nandu, for our sanity, for our closure & for all the new people who've entered our lives since we last met." his voice was hoarse & by the looks of it, he hadn't even scratched the tip of the iceberg yet, but his revelation was scaring me.

It was one thing to secretly not be over him & react instinctively seeing his actions, and it was a whole new thing to know that Manik felt the same way. Until now, my heartburns with Manik were one-sided, dealable & I was still in control, but him reciprocating to this strange dilemma I face with him, changed the whole thing! Now the possibility that we could ask each other questions beyond our rights seemed like a plausible option, we both knew we wouldn't deny each other any answer, even though we didn't have the right to ask those questions. This put the real, tangible part of our life with friends & family in murky water; one wrong move & everything we both built in so many years, based on legit apathy & disdain for each other would be lost - they would be lost without a real reason, they would be losing to the whims of the two of us.

Manik & I, two whimsical, manic, toxic individuals.

"Manik, I didn't mean to kiss Arya on the lips. I didn't know it would hurt you or not, but I couldn't anyway, not with you watching over us" I found myself repeating the same thing, now that I knew that it did bother him, I was going to leave no stones unturned to ensure he is not hurting. Why? God, damn it, I don't know.

Manik sighed with a sad smile as he looked away from me, back towards the sea. "I felt like killing him. AK. I don't think I would have been able to hold myself back, had I not walked out of there in the nick of time. It needed effort from every nerve of my brain to keep sane & every muscle of my body to get me to move away without causing a scene." he mumbled. I signed, I didn't know how to react. I didn't even feel like asking him why it bothered him so much, did I have answers to why his being with his wife bothered me so much? I figured out a long time back, there are questions that don't come with answers; some questions don't need an answer.

I was lost in these thoughts, calming down a little bit in his presence, but Manik was perturbed. Opening up to my vulnerabilities did me good, it calmed me down, but worked against him, he was left with a plethora of questions that he now needed answers to, the stuff he couldn't ask me so far. I could see it, the old Manik was winning this battle slowly & in the safety net of my presence, I felt this Manik was finally letting go too, he was sure, I'd be able to handle his demons, if they resurfaced again.

"Why, why, why damn it?" I heard him chant, all agitated as he turned back to me & clutched my shoulders hastily, shaking me a little in desperation. The younger Nandini would get riled up at this behaviour, but now I learnt to read him, his anger was a mere manifestation of his deep seated vulnerabilities, that he didn't know how else to project - that was Manik.

I cupped his face gently & he instantly relaxed his face more into my palm. "Why AK, Nandini, why him?" he murmured.

"Would you have felt any better if it was someone else?" I whispered. He was quiet for a few moments, before slowly shaking his head.

"I can't see you with anyone else, not AK, not someone else. To think of it, AK made it easy for me to hate him. I already have a baggage there, Nandu, I shudder to think what if it was a new guy, who I didn't have any reason to hate. How'd I manage then?" he sounded disturbed.

"Manik, Arya & I, we're different. We're.." I was going to try & tell him he needn't get all worked up, Arya & my thing was mostly a compromise from my side, hoping it would appease him, but he never let me finish. I saw another spark of the old Manik in him. Impatience.

"Aryaman Khurana, Nandu. Call him that when we're talking about him. I can't deal with your beloved pet names." he snapped, suddenly. A part of me felt irritated, but I got it too, didn't Soha's presence & mention unnecessarily annoy me?

A fleeting thought came to my mind, seeing our state & I couldn't help but ask him this, "Manik, why did you have to screw us up so damn bad? We're both scarred for life" I whispered, still clutching onto his face.

"I know. I know & I'm sorry. I am masochistic anyway Nandu, I was bound to ruin myself someway or the other, but my deepest regret is, I pulled you into this. I did my worst to you by tampering with our destiny & crossing paths with you forcefully. I wish you hadn't met me Nandu. The best mistake of my life became the worst punishment in your fate" he whispered, his voice cracking now.

I looked up at his face in shock, of all the things I was ready to hear, believing that meeting him was a mistake wasn't one. I don't think I'd ever be capable of realising the power of true love, the love that I was capable of giving someone, had I not met this man.

"I don't believe that Manik. I don't think our crossing paths was a mistake, I only wish I had met you earlier in life, that way I'd not have let you break in ways you were broken when we finally met. Either that, or we could have met under better circumstances, as strangers, maybe life would have been different that way?' I spoke softly, wishfully. That would have been a dream like life.

"Yes" I heard his dazed whisper. "We would have met as normal strangers, with no malice in my heart, we'd have fallen in love, just like we did, under the New York christmas mistletoes without me feeling guilty about it, all those dates & time spent together wouldn't suffocate me from inside, I wouldn't have worried while spending time with you that those were the last few before I'd break your heart, and..and I'd not break inside & still be in denial while making love to you that night.." his voice trailed. As he spoke, all those memories flashed before my eyes. So far I only knew how I felt in those moments, now I knew his feelings too. Our life needn't have been this difficult. Our lives shouldn't have been this difficult. Maybe we weren't meant to be, maybe we duped our destiny to meet each other, maybe we shouldn't have fallen in love at all, but what was our fault really? That despite everything we fell madly in love with each other? Was what we were going through, a punishment for falling in love with the wrong person? Is there anything known as free will in this universe? Must destiny control every damn action of our lives?

"I wish it didn't have to be this difficult, Manik" I whispered lowly; more to myself than to him. "I wish I had forgiven you when you were trying to make amends with me, I wish I hadn't repeated your mistake by rejecting you that day Manik. I loved you right, I could very well accept you with all your follies & love you enough to turn you into a better man. I wish I had chosen that path, but I didn't. I had chosen the same path you did. I chose revenge. I was so angry at all the ways you had violated me Manik. All I saw was anger, all I recognised was fair & unfair; did I know back then, that six years later when I'd still be lamenting losing you, all these actions I held against you, would actually cease to hold any significance? I know it sounds ridiculous, but today, I don't f*cking care that you met me to make good on a twisted plan of revenge, this older me is capable of giving a teen with a lot of emotional damage & a dysfunctional family & anger issues, the benefit of doubt for f*cking it up. Today I know that the pain I have lived through by rejecting you is so much higher than the best of your vagaries, that I'd rather have forgiven you & built a happy life with you than reject you to play by books & have lived the personal hell in which I have been dwelling in, with the shadow of my monsters, Manik" I felt remorse, but my voice was plain, I don't think I had any strength left in me to emote anyway any more, I was exhausted. I was tired. I needed rest.

"I'm sorry for doing this to you Nandu, I really am. I wish I had words to explain exactly how responsible & sh*tty I feel hearing this from you. You were right to reject me Nandu, I deserved it, but I shudder to think how much unimaginable pain you must have gone through to do the right thing by yourself, that you feel you'd rather have forgiven me! I was at fault na Nandu, it was okay for me to suffer, why'd destiny make you suffer as much, why'd you have to fall in love with me, Nandu. Why, damn it?!" his voice was laced with pain & finally I saw a drop of tear cascade down his face.

"Sshh" I tried pacifying him, by caressing his cheeks lightly, he shut his eyes in benediction and touched his forehead with mine. We stayed like that for how long, I don't know but it gave both our battered hearts a moment to rest.

"I want to kiss you, Nandu." he whispered, after some time. I don't know what the right reaction should have been for me at that moment, but I felt happy, I felt satiated & I realised I wanted to kiss him as much, maybe more.

"I know I can't, I know our time is up Nandu, but I still want to. Maybe one last time, for remembrance sake?" He sounded hopeful. I nodded softly & softly touched my soft lips on his parched ones', I felt him gasp at the mere touch & I could feel his heart beat erratically. I was in no better state, I just wanted him to kiss me now, how he wanted to, how he wished, but it seemed like, after six years, our mere touch had frozen him in a time warp & he needed time to believe this version of reality to be true.

Slowly his arms clutched me from my waist & pulled me close to him; our fronts squashing, my legs in between his. I hit him with full flush & instantly felt comforted from a familiar, nostalgic, comfortable masculine scent. I was home.

Our lips were still frozen, we hadn't kissed, but our souls merged & we both basked in the glory of it, until a sudden name popped in my head & just like that, without even thinking, I spoke aloud.

"But Soha?"

Just like that the magic in our surroundings lifted it's veil & reality came crashing down on us. I carefully tried to read Manik's expression as he took two steps back. It hurt. I realised what transpired between us was a mere weak moment for him, but for me, it had the power to overthrow every bit of sanity in my life.

"Nandini.." I heard him whisper, as he was now looking at me with guilty eyes. His guilt broke me. Why wasn't I guilty, I was with Arya, right?

"Nandini, I can't do this to Soha. Nandini, she...she doesn't deserve this. I..I can't break her trust. I cannot break us up. She...she & Roo, they're my world now. I can't let your Manik win over me. I want to..but..nope. No way." I looked at a supremely agitated Manik who was speaking incoherently, he was in two minds & both were strong, both pulled him in opposite directions & he was tearing up. I loved him right? It took me six years to realise that love was beyond wrong or right, beyond fair & unfair, beyond self worth or esteem, it is all encompassing, overbearing & surpassing any & everything else. I knew now, to love was to really exist, & I couldn't see the man behind this overwhelming feeling inside my heart, suffering before my eyes. I had to make it easy for him.

"I know, Manik. I get it. We haven't crossed any line Manik, but now we both have our closure" I whispered, as he looked at me with vulnerable eyes.

"Why did we have to bring in so many good people between us, Nandu? It's so hard to hate or hurt them" he whispered, as a drop of tear hung dangerously close to his waterline.

"We played destiny & it punished us Manik, we can't pass on our share of punishment on other innocent people. It's not fair. This is it, Manik Mahotra, this was where our story was to end. Let's not fight destiny again, I don't have the strength or the courage anymore" I whispered, as more tears pooled in my eyes.

Manik looked at me silently for a long while, absorbing my words. Then I saw him release a breath that I didn't know he was holding, when he looked at me with determined eyes and spoke - probably for the last time.

"Nandini Murthy, remember you will forever carry my soul in your heart, please don't ever push me out of there, I will have no place else to go. Take care & all the best" his voice was flat now, he had again successfully masked all his hurt behind his vacant expressions. He looked at me pointedly for a few seconds more, then he turned around and started walking out of my life, just like I had dreaded an hour back when I found him here.

Seeing his figure slowly diminish in size & eventually blur into the darkness of the night, I realised onething. Manik & I had come a long way. We parted ways again today, that too for good - but for the first time we were both on the same page while doing this.

We both were broken.

We both were going to carry each other in our heart till our last breath.

We both had to go back to our worlds now.

We both would never meet again.

There was something poetic about our end this time, maybe that's why it felt final. It was time to get back on stage with all the memories I had collected these days, it was time to survive again.

It was as much a new beginning as it was an end in so many ways.

It was time to bid Maldives, adieu.

***

A/N : So much talking, yet we don't know what's Manik & Soha's story! Seeing the number of times you guys have posted this question in the last ten odd chapters, it feels like this question is as important as the question, all viewers kept asking for one year, before the release of Bahubali 2 "Why had Kattappa killed Bahubali in the end of the first movie?" ;)

Don't worry, we are at the end of that tunnel too! You will get that update in the next chapter, wherein you will have Manik's POV too! So hold on, read up & wait one last week :)

Readers, one more thing, I see ~200 peeps reading this book every single week, how is it that only 25% of you vote? It takes less than a second to vote. If you spend time each week to read it, don't you think as a writer I deserve that much in return for writing this for you? :)

Thanks to all readers who vote & comment on each chapter, I really look forward to hearing from you guys every week :)

Much love, 

A.

Next update : Saturday, 28th August, 2021