We Will Be Loved - Tedy

There's nothing but an empty hollow that is walking down these lonesome city streets in the middle of the night; rarely any cars, less of people, and more shadows that dance in twirls to keep those lonely ones company.

They giggled often, mocked and shifted as buff men with guns; just ready to shoot at any given signal like a puff of smoke.

Maybe no one can see it, but Taemin can.

He always does.

That paranoia, eating his head.

The itch of being watched, knowing there's eyes staring to every corner and every streets he turns to - unable to escape from it, even if it's just from his head.

Not only is the shadows taunting his moves, but whistling to the body that now wasn't tainted of purity by the wrong hands.

A body now stained with finger prints and faint traces of tender kisses that once lingered on his skin - printing the initials with a fragile breathe. He can feel those stares even more now, being aware of what he did and cursing in his head for being so blind.

It's been five days, and he still showers six times a day and scrubs his skin until it bleeds - in hopes it rewinds his sins of being tranced by tempting words of lust.

But no amount of physical damage could erase the pleasure that consumed his body and the arousing noises by the mistake of that night, even if he tried.

This body, that he wanted to be treasured and loved by someone who was going to be his forever; believing he found that in Jimin.

He really did.

Why did he go too far? Taemin always asks himself this same torturing question.

Out of all the strategies to get to him, why this? Why the one thing that he valued so much?

There could've been so many less painful options, even break into his apartment - just not this.

Why did Jimin choose.... This?

Now Taemin can't even look at himself in the mirror and cry as the hickeys slowly disappear on his neck. Feeling bloated and daring himself to look up if it's possible to be pregnant because Jimin didn't use a condom that night. Scream to himself if his parents ever find out about this because they have conditioned him to not lose his virginity so easily to anyone.

To wait until marriage.

If not then he's disowned - not just by family but by society for being viewed as a whore.

No one is going to take him serious if he's not pure, they say.

They made it sound like it was such a big deal, making him believe it too, and now Taemin is just so fucking terrified all of the time!

And guilty - so much guilt that it claws into his head and leaves him frustrated with himself.

He's thought of relapsing before, just like Gem, but he can't. Woosung would literally kill him and Minho would go kill Jimin along the way.

For them, he can't do it for them.

Strangely enough, despite that, they're the only two who have served as pillars to Taemin through this. They always text him just to tell him anything, words that they're there and that he can take the time he needs. They've seen each other, a few times, but Taemin refuses to let them touch him.

He just can't handle being touched by anyone.

Now while back to feeling hollow, empty, yet paranoid, Taemin walks in this miserable night with storm clouds pooling the sky. No doubt it's going to rain soon, and he's just prepared to cry his way back home along with it.

He just has to do what he needs to do and go, that's it.

That's it.

So when he turns a corner to the familiar alleyway, more motivated it get this over with, he sees the familiar boy with the black hoodie pacing in his steps - much more quick paced.

Taemin could see the withdrawal effects all the way from where he is; Agitation, irritability to keep still, desperation, shakes - The early signs that is.

Who knows if he's had any sickness signs, which mostly likely he won't since he just relapsed once for a day after a year. If continued every day, he would be going through it horribly.

These symptoms would probably last another week or a few days at most, but who is Taemin to stop him?

He's his dealer after all, not his therapist.

Not like he should gives a shit either way, not like that has helped him in the past for caring.

So while rubbing his mess of wavy hair, he adjusts the lace of his backpack and approaches the boy with his familiar monotone face.

The kid didn't take long to notice him, immediately rushing to him with eyes of complete desperation and wide in craze.

Such a difference to how it was before.

Taemin only frowns, eyeing him, "You look like a mess."

"Y-Yup I know," He says quickly, hands twitching as he grips the money between his fingertips, "D-Do you have it-"

Dismissively Taemin extends his hand out, "You know the drill, money first."

Gem practically threw the money to his hands, but Taemin only indifferently counts it with a frown.

Seems like the kid could feel his mood because he sure didn't waste time in pointing it out.

"You look different today."

"Yeah, not so handsome when I don't try on my appearance, right?" He grumbles back, referring to his black t-shirt and jeans, before shoving the money in his pocket and going to his backpack and opens it.

"No it's not that, you're still pretty," Taemin tried not to scowl, "I didn't mean to snap at you in the messages, if that's why you're mad about. Are you disappointed in me? Am I going to bring you into more problems?"

A heavy sigh comes out of Taemin's lips, looking at the kid with a pointed look, "I don't know you for me to care. Since you're paying the full amount, there's no problems. That's it."

"Then why are you upset?"

For fuck sakes this guys is so damn curious!

Taemin grabs the sleeve of drugs for the kid and shoves it in his hands, "Here just take it, I'm going I leave-"

"Is it Jimin?" Taemin froze on the spot, "I figured out you two were friends not too long ago and now he told me you guys aren't talking - Ow!"

Taemin shackles Gem against the wall, fists gripping his hoodie with murderous eyes glaring into his soul.

The concrete he wrapped around his heart, that he desperately tried to seal closed, is cracking open.

"Don't fucking mention Jimin around me okay!" He explodes, "You don't know shit about what happened to us and you shouldn't get involved! Fuck! What you should be caring about is the fact that those goodies you have there will fuck with your life and waste your fucking breath and effort just for a single moment you get high! Life is hard and instead of finding the easy way to handle it, deal with it just like how you were before! Shit!"

Taemin couldn't help it, he was getting emotional and perhaps a bit too personal.

And he couldn't stop.

Gem blinks at him, gulping a little, "Taemin-"

"No I'm not done!" Taemin cuts in, fists tightening, "You don't fucking know how it feels like to think you got your life sorted out and then it gets fucked up because of a stupid mistake you did! Then you're left scared because you got tempted and then you'll be alone because you don't want to hear people tell you that they told you so! Don't you get it?! Get a fucking spine!"

"T-Taemin."

"What!"

Yeosang hesitated for a moment but then he carefully placed both hands on Taemin's wrists, frowning at him, "Don't c-cry."

Is he crying?

Shit, he didn't even realize he was fucking tearing up.

And right on cue it starts to rain.

Guess him and the sky have a chemistry together.

Taemin sniffles a little to now feel the tears gliding down his cheeks, blinking and gasping in his breathes as he lets Yeosang go. Feeling his lips tremble now, Taemin clasps his hands to his own face with a whimper.

"I'm so tired," He wheezes, that familiar pain on his chest scorching back up, "I'm just so tired."

Gem doesn't move from where he is, but he did feel a heavy tug in his heart to the sight of Taemin trying so hard not to cry in front of him. From seeing him so collected during their first meet to so unstable is weakening to him.

Slowly his eyes then flickers down to the small bag sleeve of the familiar white powder, the thing that has been on his mind all fucking day and night for the past five days.

His urges and craves fought against his conscious, and it took everything in him to impulsively throw the bag to the ground and approach Taemin instead.

For a moment he was going to hug him, he really was, but he doesn't know if he would be okay with that. Some people, like himself, doesn't like being touched while being upset and he's not going to do just that to Taemin

So he did the only thing that could give him somewhat of - maybe - a comforting hug, but not directly.

Gem reached to the ends of his hoodie and yanks it off his body, letting the rain hit his black t-shirt but not caring one bit as he wraps it over Taemin's shoulders as a shield. He grabs the sleeves and ties it so it wouldn't drop and rises the hood up to cover his head.

And slowly Taemin looks up from his hands, the tears burning his eyes which cheeks already pink and blotchy.

Gem suddenly didn't feel so nervous anymore.

"You are so brave," He whispers to him, twitching a small smile, "And I'm proud of you."

Taemin furrows his eyebrows, wiping his tears annoyed with his hand, "For what? I didn't do anything."

"For making it this far," Taemin's facial features softens, "You did your best, and I'm proud of you, and trust me that is enough. It's going to be okay, you'll see."

Something about those words and the tone he says it in felt like this painful comfort that Taemin needed but at the same time it ached so horrible, just directly hitting at the spot.

It's a bittersweet type of feeling.

His eyes grew more teary and he shakes his head to get his composure together but then noticing the small bag on the ground, "You know that shit is expensive, right?"

Gem flickers his eyes down, reaching and grabbing the bag before staring at it in his hand with a thoughtful look. However he tears his eyes away from it and places it inside the pocket of his sweater on Taemin

"I don't need it anymore," He whispers, stepping back, shyly smiling, "I'll be back for my sweater. My excuse to see you again."

Before Taemin could even protest, Gem turns around and walks away with nothing but a t-shirt to conceal him from the rain.

Meanwhile his sweater stayed to serve as a blanket to the shaken up dealer, who carefully furls his fingers on the sleeve with a small twitch to the corner of his lips.

Feeling..... Warm.

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Bad Dream - Ruelle

Shots, after shots, after shots drowning the liquid of alcohol down the burning throat, yet Jeongguk still can't manage to get himself a little tipsy. Rounds after rounds has passed, and life still appears clear.

Like some fucking glass.

And he just wanted to blur it.

He doesn't know how long he's lasted like this, drinking and glaring at that stupid coffee table with a hand shaking at he brings another shot glass up and drowns it down.

Five days.

Five days of pulling and act and being the stronger for the three to what happened, but in reality he's drowning.

Just like this alcohol.

He knew he did the right thing in telling Woosung, he did, but he lost him in the process.

And that was a sacrifice he had to make, just so they can get help out of this mess. Doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

After this is over, Woosung won't talk to him again and that's something he has to start accepting.

Even if it pisses him off to his own self pity.

His mind flew too far and without realizing it, the shot glass shattered in his hand but he didn't even feel it. He didn't feel the shards poking his palm, the blood already gliding his skin.

He was too numb to feel anything.

But luckily for him he didn't have to deal with it for too long.

The front door of this suite opens, in entering Taehyung and Jimin in this cocoon of self pity inside these walls. They have grown so use to coming here, since it just seems like their only safe place to express whatever fucked up emotion they're feeling - ironically so.

Jimin was the first to notice Jeongguk's hand, and he didn't seem so worried as one would expect. Maybe because he knows that Jeongguk is coiling a lot inside, or he just gets it, but to not cause an alarm he just approaches Jeongguk and takes his other hand and helps him to his feet.

Taehyung went to clean up the remaining pieces of glass on the floor while Jimin and Jeongguk went to the kitchen. Jimin goes off to find some pliers, alcohol, and a ton of other shit that Jeongguk didn't expect for there to be here.

Through the process, the two didn't say anything, and Jeongguk was feeling too empty to even flinch when Jimin would take out the shards of glass from his hand. Maybe the alcohol did kick in and he didn't notice, not like he cared enough to notice it either way.

What did make him feel something, even if it was a twitch of relaxation, was when Taehyung's arms found themselves around his waist from behind with a chin to his shoulder and eyes focusing on the wound on his hand.

That just been their way to cope; physical affection.

Whether it's through kisses, holding hands, cuddling on the couch, the list goes on. They just rely onto that simple distraction as reassurance that they aren't alone, to fill in that void.

Jimin has been handling it alone; whether it's through excessive smoking or working more hours, he just doesn't think he deserves to feel warm in that type of affection. So he just craves being on his own.

To be alone.

Beating himself up a lot along the way, no surprise to that.

"There," He soon whispers, wrapping Jeongguk's arm with a gauze after cleaning his wound up completely, "No stitching needed but don't be stupid again."

Jeonngguk doesn't say anything, only slowly nods while analyzing his hand. Meanwhile Taehyung slowly lets go of Jeongguk and moves to Jimin, who's sitting on the counter and putting the things he used on the metal tray while sanitizing his hands.

He stands between his legs now, Taehyung stares at him with a frown to the rings of darkness under his eyes to the clear lack of sleep. Jimin snaps his eyes to him once he was done, perking an eyebrow.

"What?"

Taehyung studies his face, the frown on his lips deepening, "Jimin..... You know if you need to talk about it, you can talk to us."

Carefully Jeongguk fixes his gaze up from his hand, watching the two.

The words didn't nudge Jimin, or he just didn't let it show, but he just shakes his head with a grimace, "Thanks but... I'll be fine.... Eventually."

Taehyung didn't believe him, Jeongguk probably didn't either, but he didn't pester him on more on the matter and just nods, stepping back and turning around, "I'm going to shower," Was all he said and walks across the penthouse to wherever the bathroom is.

Now left here is Jimin and Jeongguk. They didn't say anything to each other, Jeongguk too focused on his hand with head moving else where and Jimin cleaning everything else up on the sink after he got off the counter and threw out the remaining trash.

Then he turns to Jeongguk, drying his hands, "So I'm going to head out, just take care of that hand-"

"Can you stay? Just for tonight?" Jeongguk says quietly, still not looking at Jimin, "I don't like to think of you being alone right now."

"Not like I'm not use to it," Jimin mutters back and walks around the island to stand in front of him, "You got Taehyung here to keep you company. Trust me, I won't be of much fun."

Jeongguk rolls his eyes and grabs Jimin's arm when he tries to walk away, "Believe it or not but we feel better with you present."

It's clear Jimin didn't want to let those words get to his heart, or to feel sensitive to them - the battle being so clear behind his crystalline eyes. Not letting him have room to overthink it so much, Jeongguk just tugs him forward.

For a moment Jimin didn't fight back, but glitters did burn his eyes that Jeongguk caught onto instantly - even if he tried to look away from him; trying not to cry. Carefully Jeongguk clasps his hands to Jimin's jaw and guides his attention to him, there now able to see better the delicate gaze he's holding back fiercely.

But Jeongguk nudges their foreheads together, still staring into his eyes, "It's okay.... Stop holding it in."

Jimin closes his eyes, shaking his head with lips tightening together, "Please just s-stop," He shutters quietly, "D-Don't make me remember... It hurts... It hurts okay."

"I know, and it's going to for a while but you're not handling it alone, okay?"

"I-I still hate you..... For not telling me."

"Would you have still went through with the video knowing that it was going to Woosung?"

Jimin took longer to answer, lips wobbling even more, "Or maybe I just hate myself."

"Well I don't hate you," Jimin flutters his eyes open to this, "I don't hate you Jimin. You can blame me, hate me all you want. If that makes you feel better, I can take it."

No words were spoken from there on, or maybe it just wasn't necessary. Jimin couldn't suppress his emotions anymore and he bows his head down, pressing his forehead to Jeongguk's shoulder.

And screams.

A painful scream that followed by sobs of a heart filled with guilt.

Jeongguk only wraps his arms around his body and held him, his own tears filled his eyes as Jimin continues to scream and cry in his complete vulnerability.

Unable to stop blaming himself.

In the same penthouse, while Jimin cries, in the bathroom Taehyung is sitting on the pebbled ground of the shower with knees to his chest and hands to his ears, sobbing hard with the water of the shower head mixing in his tears as it pours down his body.

The three filled in with their own pity party, and it seems like it's something that's never going to end.

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A/N:

Many scenes mixed together and it's a bit angst but we're about to get into business.

And see some interesting characters pop up soon.

I PURPLE YOU! <33