Laying on the playmat, Olivia's bright eyes watch me intently as I shake the little bear full of bells. A big gummy smile follows as she impatiently shakes her fists and kicks her legs. Then she's over, rolling onto her back she now looks up at me in a mixture of surprise and pride.

"Who is the cleverest little bubba in the world?" I ask her, her face lighting up once more as I lean closer to kiss her chin. "You are!"

Raya appears in the doorway, roughly rubbing her hair with a towel which she chucks towards the laundry as she comes over.

"Thank you. I needed that shower without a little person joining me. This whole, being held twenty four seven thing is exhausting. Keiran's great, but sometimes she just wants Mummy, don't you darling?" Raya sits beside me, and tiggles Olivia's stomach making her smile and wriggle.

"You keep telling me about how she screams and and is a little monster, but I think you're lying. I just don't believe it." I smirk, ignoring the look she sends my way. "You're a little angel aren't you?"

I get a gurgle sound in response that I'm going to presume is a yes.

"I'll call you at three in the morning for you to come and see how angelic she is." Raya threatens. "No Apollo today? I thought he would have come with you considering how he is with Olivia."

She's fishing for a reaction and I don't bite. Since I got here, I've been dodging her questions on how things are and what's been going on. Apparently she isn't going to give up.

"He doesn't want to compete for position of favourite," I shrug, jingling the bear for Olivia again. "Cause I win, hey Liv?"

"Elise, what's going on? You've been distant, vague, I'm not sure what, but I know you're avoiding it. Talk to me! Penny may be more into this girl talk biz, but I got your back too. Olivia as well!" She frowns.

"It's nothing," I sit up and Olivia instantly pouts. "We're just, having some difficulty with our communication. He got super, maybe even a little over the top, annoyed at me for meeting the Valkyries which I already told you about, and since then, we just can't seem to get it right. Maybe before that with all the fae crap. I don't know."

"What do you mean? Maybe you just need to talk more?"

"I try to, but he just, changes the subject or we start another argument. Like, he has an opinion on everything I do to the point where I just feel suffocated. I have been trying so hard to be good, or at least, do what I think he wants, but it's still wrong. Something is clearly going on, and I haven't even lost it at him yet. My self control is improving," I sigh. "Plus there's the fact that we've never had such, amazing sex, but that isn't everything. It's like, we get into these arguments, I end up giving in, we make up, we do it again the next day. It's actually exhausting!"

"It's never been, simple, for you guys, but you've overcome a lot together. It'll work out, these things always do."

"It's nothing right, just a stage. I'm sure you guys have your ups and downs?" I ask a little too hopefully.

"We're a bit, different, to you two. We've been married for five years, together for seven and known each other our whole lives, so I guess just got to skip all this getting to know you, awkward part?" She bit her lip as if to stop herself, but then carried on. "You met two years ago, and so much as been packed into that time. Be kind to each other. Be patient. What is meant to be, will be."

"I hate being patient."

"I know you do, so well done for how you're handling this. It's very, mature of you." Raya praised.

An hour later I head back to our hotel room, and find it empty. Deciding to make the most of my free time, I spend a bit of time browsing Julio's case updates while taking a long, relaxing bath. The fact his password was Robyn123 made it too easy to get in to see what would have been otherwise restricted. Obviously both John and Kale had swallowed the tubes to hide, steal, maybe destroy them, as their autopsies revealed similar destruction to their organs. There was no doubt in my mind that had happened because they were trying to find them. It was unfortunate Kale didn't die while swallowing them as his friend had. The cause of his death was a little more, gruesome and I skip over those details.

Andrew and Asha had been located, their interrogations planned for tomorrow morning. Nicki was missing, and both claimed she was dead. Well, she was a vampire so technically, they weren't lying. Half of the portal rocks had been taken into storage, the other half were also missing and my money was on Nicki having those. I made a note on Julios to-do list to get security upgraded around the bits we had in our custody because them being a target was more than likely. If someone took something I wanted, I'd go and get it how ever I had to.

Feeling relaxed, focused and determined to get more 'talking' done as Raya suggested, and less, of other things until we work out our issues, I order room service for dinner, and start to write a list of things I think need to be discussed. If I had a list, I could stick to those points, not get sidetracked and hopefully keep my cool without setting off more disagreements.

I was half way through my list, when someone started to knock on the door. Cautiously I went to open it, and seeing Meghan standing there was definitely unexpected..

"Hi! What are you doing here?" I opened the door and she stepped in.

"Kara sent me to update you on our progress," She looked around the room and I waited for her to go on. "This is so nice."

"It should be for what they're charging to stay here." I sat down on the sofa and she joined me, rubbing her hand on the velvet cushions as she sat.

"This feels expensive." Meghan seemed to appreciate that about the cushion, her fingers lingering on the pearl buttons around the edge. "I like these."

"Yeah, it's a nice cushion?" I didn't realise she'd come to discuss home decor.

"Anyway," She started, finally putting it down. If it went missing later, she would be my main suspect. "As per our agreement, we have been looking into the source of the dust. Our scouts went to the Coven you told us about. They were reluctant to oblige, but we managed to persuade them."

"I'm sure you did!"

Meghan smirks, shrugging it off. "They mentioned a Prophet. Have you heard of this before?"

"Yes. The idiots behind all of this are doing it because of what the Prophet told them." I roll my eyes.

"They all seem to willing to believe and do what they're told. The High Priestess was supposed to become one of the gods, the coven had been chosen and blessed and Hecate was going to reward them for her resurrection," Meghan doesn't hide her amusement, soon laughing with me.

"Clearly that worked out so well for them," I finally say.

"This Prophet gave them the poison, performed the magic to curse the letter, and also," she hesitated, "Told them you were the only sacrifice Hecate would accept as her new vessel."

"What can I say, I have that effect on people," but none of this is was helping. "So, please tell me you've set up a meeting for me and this prophet or know where to find them?"

Meghan shakes her head.

"It's a she. Not of this world. We traced a few locations where she had come through from another realm. It's as though she, borrows, or piggy backs of other people. She times her visits just right, makes it harder to distinguish her mark."

"What about the ones that she travels with? Can you trace them?" I ask hopefully. "How do you know its a she, and just the one?"

"The fae told us. One of them heard her speaking but she always has her face covered. Just the one, well that we can tell. It's not that she's travelling with the others, she just, hides behind them, like slips in before the door closes."

That's a bit sneaky and something I would totally do.

"Who is coming into this realm from another often enough for her to come and-" I stop, already knowing my answer.

"What is it?" Meghan asks curiously.

"I know how she's doing it and which realm she comes from. It has to be from Apollo's home land. They've been coming and going for months now." I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Calm. Focused. "I think I may have already met her too."

"How? When?"

"When I was sacrificed, and in the Underworld. I was attacked by this, well, she was dressed like a cartoon ninja. She had it in for me and Apollo, so makes sense with everything you've just said. Hades arrived at the right time, and scared her off." My own to-do list just got bigger than Julio's.

"We also found pieces of the portal nearby, and are setting up a watch to see who comes from them. There are some vampires involved with this, some weak magic too, so we're not expecting anything that we can't handle, we just have to wait until nightfall to meet the blood suckers." She says excitedly.

"You found them?" I sigh, feeling relieved. The tides had turned, we were coming out in front now. "That's great. We have the rest in lockdown."

"Kara was of the mind to destroy them. Should we not?"

It made sense. Good luck getting your portal working with half of it gone, yet I shook my head.

"Not just yet. I need to run it by the team." See. Sensible option; not an Elise is doing what she wants when she feels like it decision. "Let me speak to Apollo too, I want to be there tonight."

"Of course. It is why I came!" She smiled. "Hopefully we can do battle together. We have heard stories of you, God Killer. You are like us. Brave. Strong. A warrior!"

I force a smile. "Yeah, maybe."

"You do not want this fight? It has been too long since my sword last tasted blood."

"It hasn't been long enough between meals for mine." I try to joke, but she doesn't get it. Then again I wasn't joking. If we could do this without the need to go all, Rambo on them, I was fine with that. "Lets try and keep it as peaceful as possible."

Meghan nodded, bowing slightly as she stood, but I could tell my request annoyed her. "As you wish."

I stand by the window after she leaves and look out over the city. The civilians go about their days completely unaware of what we were dealing with. Could Andrew have had a point, that maybe it would be better if they knew about, everything? Then again, the instant fear, hate and chaos that followed the vampires stunt told me no. I don't think many sat around their dining tables that night and planned welcome parties to their newly discovered vampire neighbours or seemed excited over the leeches being real and not a myth. There were enough problems in this world, dealing with the supernatural wasn't one they needed to add to that.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Apollo asks, his arms wrapping around my waist as his chin rests on my shoulder.

"Later." I sigh, enjoying the peace for a moment longer.

We stare out as the sky starts to dark and the sun disappears, until someone knocks on the door only this time I am expecting company.

"I cooked dinner!" I tell him, going to open the door.

Sure enough, the efficient waiter comes in and sets up our meal on the dining table - gone as quickly as he had arrived.

"Aw, honey you shouldn't have!" He mocks, lifting the lid to find a burger with the lot.

We sit, and as he starts to eat, I try and work out the best way to bring everything up.

"So, this afternoon has been interesting."

"Yeah? How's Olivia?" Apollo asks.

"Good, she's amazing. She's starting to roll over now!" I tell him with a little too much enthusiasm. "Raya and Keiran are good too."

"Cool." He keeps eating.

"Meghan, one of the Valkyries came by as well." He stops chewing. "The deal I made with them pretty much was me handing them the hard job of finding out where their poison came from and so they went to the coven as their starting point."

"And?" There's interest there, and I relax.

Being open and communicating works. I didn't keep it from him and he's happy to be told this. Easy.

"The Prophet got a mention again," I tell him what Meghan had said, right up to going to the stake out tonight. "So, we can go and see what happens, help if we need to."

"We don't need to go. They're Valkyries. Let them handle it, and tell Julio no need to look for the rest of the portal." He says, the drop it and move on, tone back. "This is his case. You helped enough."

"But-"

"No. It's not your problem."

"Well, you know, apart from the fact this portal is being constructed to try and destroy my powers and this prophet person clearly has it out for me, for us!" I snap.

"All the more reason to stay out of it," Apollo shrugs. "Why don't we go see a movie tonight? That zombie romance one you mentioned the other day?"

"We could, but-" He stops chewing again.

"Seriously, just let it go. Call Julio now so the team can start to drive here. The Valkyries will handle anything else, and we can go and enjoy our night."

"Fine." I huff, pushing my plate away. "I'll go call Julio now then."

"Good."

"Good."

I do it and the few hours that they'll take to get here, will mean the Valkyries will be dealing with everything and then just hand over the rocks. It's like I am subcontracting them out to do a job I could do, or should at least help them with.

"We need to talk though." I finally say when I come back into the room.

"What about now?"

"Us," I groan sitting beside him on the lounge. "What is happening? Why are we fighting all the time? Please don't say I'm imagining it again, because I'm not and I can't handle it anymore."

"I just worry about you, and you're constantly throwing yourself into other people's messes. On average, you seem to be killed and brought back at least twice a year. So you've got at least one more to deal with before new years, unless you plan on setting a new record?"

"Funny." I mumble, glaring at him.

"Wasn't supposed to be," He sighed. "You're on this destructive path and you don't even see it. Just this constant cycle of drama that can be avoided."

"I can't really avoid it though. It's not like I asked for my blood to be part of Selene's plan or to become cursed by the fates or whatever or for this to even be my life. It's' not that bad, I mean we wouldn't have even met if not for the apparently, avoidable drama. Most of it comes with the territory of being what I am, a Hunter." I remind him.

"You're not just a Hunter anymore. You don't need to be. You're more like me, a Power now more than anything!" His tone grates the wrong way on my nerves.

"But I was me first, before this magic crap."

"Well, instead of still focusing on that person, start thinking more of the future. Do you want to break the cycle or just keep going through all this, stuff, again and again until someone gets lucky and you stay dead for real?"

I was tempted to grab his head and bang it on the table a few times to see if that would work as a reset button on him. My hands grip the cushion Meghan had admired so hard, I know if I look now my hand will have a row of little red spots from the pearly bits around the edge. He made it sound so simple, but to me, it wasn't.

"I know how it must be for you, to have to watch me go through all of this, time and time again. I mean, those times you were hurt, when you were poisoned, it's terrifying," I say slowly.

He sits back in the chair and sighs, a long, deep sound of someone who is exhausted. "It's more than that, Bunny. So much more."

"Then help me understand," I hate how desperate I sound. "What is it like then?"

He looks at me then, and takes my hand in his.

"It's all of this. It's not just the missions, or the bad hand you're forever being dealt with, or how you always just rush into things without thinking it through. I know you don't do it on purpose. You're so young in the grand scheme of things, you don't know any better, but getting this powers, its a chance for you to learn, grown and get away from it all. Don't you get that?"

"Get away?" I frown.

"Hear me out," He pauses, his brown creasing with concentration while he starts to say something but doesn't, until he finally does. "It's a chance for you to start your own life, a life you want that's not dictated by some stupid Treaty, or those around you and the trouble that is here. It's our chance to start a life together."

"What are you saying?"

"The more I get to be me again, the real me, and not Logan Murphy, the more I realise that this world, this life, isn't what I want."

My heart starts to pound uncomfortably in my chest as my mouth goes dry. I'm almost scared to ask, but I do.

"What do you want then?"

"I don't want to pretend anymore. I thought it would be fine, but I am not Logan. I am not a Tracker. I am not from this world. I lied when I told you it's still me, that inside we're the same person because we're not. All we have in common is the fact we both love you. Here I am, Elise, we are Gods. We are Powers. To be at the mercy of others, dealing with these issues, is not how things are supposed to work."

Not quite how I saw this all going when I said I wanted us to talk.

"I want you. I want us. I want what we had this time last year, what we had last week and over the new year. Just us, no problems, no worries. You ran away and rejected this life once, why not just do it again, but with me."

"Are you serious?" The words come out before I can stop them.

"Yes. We can go anywhere, there are realms you never would dreamed about. There are no limits on what we can do or where we can go." He enthuses, yet I hear the caution in his tone.

"But I can't do that. I know that now." Running never helped anything. "You're asking me to leave, my family, my friends, my home, everything, to disappear with you? I can't do that."

"I left mine, to be here with you." Apollo says in such a way I get goosebumps and not the good kind.

"I never asked you to do that. You-" My voice shakes as I try and find the words

"No you didn't, and I'm not blaming you or wanting you to feel bad about any of it. Just, give me something," He stops, and we just look at each other.

"I gave you my heart, my love. I gave you another chance after everything," but that isn't enough. "You're asking for everything."

"I know. I've given you all I can, now I want you to do the same for me."

He's serious.

I can't speak.

I don't know what to say even if I could.

This wasn't how I saw this going. My throat feels tight, my eyes are burning as my body seems to be refusing to let the tears start. We look at each other and I wait, I wait for him to make this a bad joke, to tell me he didn't mean right here, right now, that in a months time, a year, maybe, we could talk about it again.

Thank you for waiting for me.
Thank you for not just running off without thinking it through.
Thank you for not keeping it secret

Any of those would have been fine. We would eat dinner. Find Meghan, catch Nicki, tell the council it's over, had a holiday, and then do whatever needed to be done next. Civilian world peace? I'll get started on it first thing Monday.

"I can't just leave." I finally say, hugging myself, I look down at my arms.

"I know." He says softly.

"Then why even ask me?"

"Because I was hoping I'd get to come first for once." My heart is already aching. "Like I said, it's me, its you, it's all of whatever this is. I guess I never thought it all through either. Maybe, give it some time, and things will be different. Maybe I will be different. I haven't really worked out who I am anymore either."

"Then, be Logan again. Be here. Be with me!" I sob, my stomach sinking as his face becomes void of any emotion.

"I'm not, him."

"You were once!" Being mature, handling this well, whatever my original plan was just died as I screamed at him now.

"And you loved him. It wasn't actually me you gave another chance to, it was him." He says softly. "It's not your fault. You never asked for any of this and I never expected to meet you or feel how I did."

"No. That's not true. I got to know you as well. We've spent these last few months with apparently no secrets, remember. You told me things about you. You let me see, the real you, don't use Logan as an excuse! I don't think you know me as well as you think you do!" I want to suffocate him with the pillow, instead I wipe the tears from my eyes as a few slide down his cheeks too. "I thought-"

I swallow down a sob that nearly escaped, yet another followed and then another until I'm not hunched over against the lounge unable to stop anything that was currently happening to me.

I thought what?

That this was going to be forever?

Nothing in this world ever is.

"I thought so too,." He comes closer and pulls me into the now familiar embrace. "And maybe, one day it will be?"

"Don't do this. Stay. We can go anywhere in the world, right now. We can take a break from all of this and work it out together!"

"I don't just want a break from it." He sighs. "Let me show you what's great about your powers, about this whole damn universe. This, now, it's nothing. We can find our own world and-"

"And this one? If I leave, then what?"

Would it go back to how it used to be? A time people forgot about where they were scared of going out into the dark because the monsters that lurked there weren't just from your imagination. Would my kind stand a chance at bringing it back under control with my powers here to help them? Maybe they would be the first to go, giving the supernatural world the control the vampires already seem to be craving?

"It'll still be here if you want to come back." He tells me, but I wasn't so sure it would.

Even if it was, my parents, my family, my friends - what of them? If he asked me a year ago I would have gone to ends of the universe and back again with him, but now? Now I knew I couldn't leave.

"Please, just stay. Stay with me!" I beg. I grab his shirt, like that alone will keep him there. "If you love me as you say you do, stay."

He lets me go, and shakes his head. "And then what?"

"I don't know, but we'll work it out!" I'm shouting again now. I can't help it. "You can't do this, Apollo. You just can't!"

We just sit there holding onto each other, and nothing either of us can say will fix it. Even if he does stay, it's broken now. Again.

"I love you, you have no idea how much, but that isn't enough anymore. I want a life that is our own. I want to start our own family. I want more than this." He kisses the top of my head as I lean against his chest, unwilling to let go.

"I just wanted to talk. I didn't want, this." I mumble, his shirt wet from my tears.

"I know. I don't think this is the end for us though," He sounds so certain.

I remember what Hecate said. "Maybe in the far, distant future, things will work out."

"I hope so."

"Me too." We stay like that until my shoulders stop shaking and my eyes run out of tears. "Where will you go now?"

"Home, until Art doesn't need me anymore. Then who knows."

"I want to hate you, but I can't." I wipe my face and he passes me a tissue. I don't even want to know what I look like right now.

"Please don't, just, give me some time. It's a big ask, but I don't want us to be enemies."

"You're playing the still be friends card?" I ask, almost in disbelief.

"I want to stay more than friends, but I can't ask that of you now."

I nod, as hot, salty tears reappear and with a final, sad smile, he's gone. Just like that. I look around the empty room, waiting for him to come back because he changed his mind but twenty minutes later it doesn't happen.

An hour later it still hasn't happened.

I don't move from the sofa, staring across the room at the plates that remain on the table and the leftover food on them.

Two hours later my head drops as exhaustion creeps in yet my eyes are too tired to close. My head hurts. My body hurts. My heart, well, I'm sure it's still there.

"Elise?" Portia asks softly, sitting beside me.

"It's a bit hard to stay in his light when he isn't here, or did I just the make the biggest mistake of my life by not going with him?" I ask her after a few minutes of silence.

"I don't see everything Elise. I can't tell you the answer to that. It's not-" She started, yet the second her hand touches my shoulder I'm up and out of the chair.

"Don't touch me." I'm stiff from sitting and my steps are awkward as I head towards the window. "I'm fine. You can go now."

"Elise, please let-"

"I don't want to hear it. Just, leave me alone. Like, forever. I don't need you, or any of them!" I scream at her. When she doesn't move, I scream again. "Get. The. Fuck out!"

Reluctantly she leaves and I'm all alone, again.

____________________

Again, I did this a bunch of times - the outcome always the same.

*lets out a big breath*