I can't forget you
even if I erase you

It had been more than five days, which meant my ankle should have healed.

However, I hadn't been allowed to get on my feet for most of the day, unless it was to go to the bathroom, and even then I had to be accompanied by someone. Well, generally. Most of the time, they allowed me to have my privacy, which was quite a surprise.

One would think most people in my predicament would be grateful to be in this kind of situation, since it allowed them to be alone. I processed things differently from most people, though—once you had seen a certain amount of people die, it was easier to deal with petty betrayals like this.

Also, it was boring, staring out the same window for most of the day, thinking the same thoughts and worrying about the same old family rivals trying to kill me for something I hadn't even done.

Although I had expected the racers to reveal their plans sooner, but I wasn't really surprised when they made me take the backseat for almost a whole week. Not knowing things was the worst thing I could think of, especially when they were all centered around me. It was one of those things you never got used to, no matter how thick your skin was.

And anyway, I didn't like staying in one place. Not because it was like solitary confinement, but because anyone could visit me, and I wouldn't be able to turn away from them, even if I had no wish to even look at them.

Prime example, Junhee.

He was one of those people who never gave up—too soft and forgiving to be part of an organization which dealt with cold-blooded killing, which was why it had been hard to even suspect him in the first place. At the beginning, he had tried to reason with me, then apologize, then apologize more, but I hadn't responded. If he had been spying on me for the past three years, he should have known me well enough to know that I wasn't going to forgive him that easily.

And yet, he had stayed true to his personality, sitting by my bed every evening for an hour. It had been irritating, but I had grown to control my anger, though it still affected me from time to time. The best way to deal with people like him wasn't to yell at them, it was to ignore them completely.

But when such a vigorous routine it interrupted, you have to let go of your stubbornness. So when Jun didn't show up at my bedside at six p.m., or six thirty, or even seven, my curiosity peaked.

And, because I had been specifically instructed not to, I got up and decided to look into it.

I hadn't left my room in so long that my house felt alien when I finally stepped out of it. No one seemed to be around. They probably thought I was being a good little girl and obeying their wishes, which was laughable—the last time they had told me to stay put, I had ended up leaving the country.

There were only two rooms on the second floor, not including the bathroom. The other room was just across the hallway from mine, and I moved towards it now, after having tested my ankle to make sure it would bear my weight. Its door was open just a crack, and my heartbeat spiked. The situation wasn't exactly life-or-death, but it still gave me a rush, especially as I wasn't in a ranger of being killed.

Taking a deep breath so I wouldn't have to breathe hard, I leaned in to listen.

Distinctly, I could make out a tall figure, standing a couple of feet away from the bed, with a head of dark hair. Jun. "I told you—"

"And I heard you." It was Vernon's voice, I realized with a start, smoothly cutting off Jun as he started to speak. "It doesn't matter, anyway. You failed."

There was a pause, and I strained to listen. "I didn't fail," Jun replied, quietly. This was what I had meant by sensitive. He got disheartened way too quickly. "This wasn't a part of my instructions."

"Keeping her safe doesn't just mean keeping her safe physically, you know," Vernon said, and I could imagine his carefully placid expression as he said that, the same expression he's had when he had told me that he was the right hand. "And seeing that you're so close, wouldn't that have been your duty whether a part of the instructions or not?"

"We—" Jun broke off. "I'm not close to her."

"Oh, aren't you?" That tone. It gave me chills, and I let out a puff of air through my mouth. "I'd really like for her to hear that."

"I—" He sputtered, and I almost sympathized. I knew what it was like to be faced with a loophole argument, where no matter what you said, you were wrong. "I did keep her safe to the best of my abilities."

"Well, the 'best of your abilities' clearly wasn't enough," Vernon said, no emotion in his voice, and my skin crawled at how cold he sounded, as if he truly didn't care how his words affected the listener.

Another silence fell, and my fingers tightened around the knob as I wondered whether or not I should step in. I knew I shouldn't really have cared about Jun after all that, but I couldn't help my instincts.

"It's not like you followed your instructions very well, anyway," Vernon spoke again, calmer this time. "You were ordered to report back to me about everything you found out, right?" I heard the sound of a drawer opening, and crinkling plastic. "I suppose you weren't going to tell me about there, either."

My throat closed up. I wasn't sure how exactly I knew what he was holding, but I did. Of course. It couldn't be anything else. Shock hit me before anything else, shock at the fact that he'd found out, then shame. Then anger. My eyes burned.

Jun was silent, presumably just as surprised as I was. "I didn't... I didn't know."

"You didn't know?" There was emotion in Vernon's voice now, barely concealed underneath his icy tone, but I knew. He sounded not just irritated, but livid—as if he was going to kill someone. "You lived right next door for three whole years, had every opportunity to notice any changes in her behaviour, and you didn't know?"

I swallowed against the sudden dryness in my mouth. No matter how many times I reminded myself that I was hidden, I couldn't help but be scared—scared of the fact that he knew, scared of what could happen to me if he found me, scared of him.

Jun had gone utterly silent, and I could picture him clearly. Stiff as a board, back straight, arms rigid at his sides. Whenever he was afraid, he would become inflexible both in body and mind. And anyone in their right mind would be afraid of Vernon when he was in one of his moods.

With slow, deliberate steps, I backed away from the door, taking care not to put too much pressure on my ankle despite it being more or less recovered. I didn't want to be discovered eavesdropping, especially the reason I was able to do so was because I was directly disobeying the person I was hiding from. The feeling was uncanny, as I usually wasn't inclined to listening to Vernon, but I couldn't help it.

I turned, intending to retreat to the safety of my room, heart still hammering away in my chest. And I would have done so, if it hadn't been for the spectre standing at my door.

Yeeun leaned against the doorframe, her arms folded over her chest. I stepped back unconsciously, waiting for her to chew me out, but she didn't offer any indication of annoyance over me leaving the room.

"Be downstairs in five minutes," she said instead. "We leave tonight."

──────

I was downstairs in less than five minutes, such was my eagerness. Everyone was gathered around the dining table, including Vernon—though he didn't look particularly happy. Jun was standing a few feet away from him, closer to his sister, and didn't meet my eyes when I walked into the room. Good.

"First of all, welcome back," Jungkook spoke up as soon as I had taken a seat, and I noticed that he had a map of the city spread out on the table before him. They probably didn't know their way around the city that well. "I know you must be impatient to know where we're going, but you'll have to hold on for a little longer." I frowned, but he was already looking away. "Yeeun, if you will."

"The Lees have been sending in their more formidable killers after you since two weeks ago," Yeeun said, launching into the facts without preamble. "We expect this to be because their heir is in this city—of course, there are other things to take into consideration, but they're not that important. We still don't know where they are, but they've been quiet for the past week, probably because they know we're here.

"Our main objective is still your safety, but we'll have to play more offensive this time, mainly because of the kinds of killers they could be sending after you," she continued. "But, as I said, we don't know where they are."

I arched an eyebrow. "How is this relevant?"

"Just giving you a heads-up about what the situation is," Lucas answered. "So you don't go running off again."

Narrowing my eyes, I opened my mouth to answer, but Jennie beat me to it.

"As irritating as he might be, he's right," she said. "The circumstances are dire, and we're not taking any risks this time around. You've been fine for the past three years, and that was because of the collective effort of two gangs—it's not just the bikers who are after you now, Y/N. It's the Lees. The biggest criminal clan in Seoul."

I closed my mouth, and glared at the table instead. It wasn't that I didn't know how serious the condition was, but I couldn't treat it that way. The Lees seemed far away and untouchable, and I felt no real fear when I thought about them, because I'd never really faced them. The only 'Lee' killer I'd ever had contact with was Minho, and though he was intimidating in his own right, he hadn't seemed too undefeatable to me.

"Speaking of two gangs," a new voice added, and I looked up curiously at the person leaning against the wall. "I should introduce myself." The voice belonged to a slender man with dark hair and pretty, slanted eyes, the hint of a smile dancing on his lips. "I'm Ten."

Not dropping my guard, I gave him a cold once-over. He was easy on the eyes, with a dancer's body, lithe yet muscular. On the outside, he looked almost delicate, with his charming elfin smile and his winsome features, but I had met a significant amount of pretty boys who could cut out your heart—literally—without batting an eye.

"Ten is the leader of one of the gangs we dealt with back in Korea," Jennie said. "Lisa is under him. He'll be one of the people hunting the contract killers."

"There's an information dealer a few hours away who has offered information on the Lees' current position and motives," Yeeun said, steering the discussion back to the topic. "A group of four people, including me, Ten, and Vernon, are going to meet him tonight. We leave in an hour." She looked at me. "Hwang, you're coming with us."

"No, she's not," Vernon said immediately.

"Yes, I am," I shot back. He glowered at me, but I turned my attention towards Yeeun. "Who are we meeting?"

"One of Baekhyun's contacts," Jennie said, and my determined expression faltered. "Lee Jaehwan."

──────

seventeen is coming back tomorrow and i'm not ready

thoughts? theories? there are so many characters i have yet to introduce and it's getting exciting shdjs