chapter 50 | Perfect number
At first, he stares into my eyes, taking a few seconds to get it. "A little, why?" he licks his lips, and they grasp my attention. "Just a little?"
He shrugs, meaning that he is lying to me. "I'm fine. Why do you ask?" he avoids answering properly, getting me to heave a sigh. "I'm just worried."
"No need to," he attempts to reassure me, but this does not work at all. I know he is in pain because of me. I remain silent for a short moment but keep my eyes on him while eating, small bites at a time.
I did everything that had to be done in order to make it pleasuring for him as well, but no matter how much time I took, how much I loosened him and used lube, he could not take it, and this makes me wonder whether we could do it again.
"Did it feel good with her?" I let out, knowing he will understand what I mean. A smile instantly grows on his face, and he drops his look down to the food, shyly. "Yeah."
"Do you think you'd like to try again or...?" I do not ask straightforwardly. "Cause...you know. I don't think I'd want to do it again and see that it just causes you pain."
"I don't know...I feel like you tore me apart, but not my heart..." his sentence causes me to laugh without willing to, feeling bad but seeing him chuckle. "Are you making fun of me? Do you wanna know what it is to not be able to sit down?" he does not raise his voice, to my greatest relief. "No, I'm sorry. It's your fault, you're making jokes about something you shouldn't!"
"Of course," he glares at me but shoves a whole chicken wing in his mouth. "What if we can't do it though? I wanted to."
I do not know what to tell him. "Well. You can't force yourself, so I guess we'll just do it with her only and not together," I do not find anything else to say, believing we can only deal with it. "I'm sad. I wanted to get it too," he does not stay serious again, making me sneer but sigh at this horny boy. "You can still suck it, so it's good, hm?" I whisper to him, but he does not even laugh, he nods. "Yeah. I finally had it, and I'm happy."
I shake my head out of disbelief but cannot ignore the satisfaction this gives me. I love to hear this type of stuff.
"What are you doing, baby?" I speak in a louder voice now that it is not between us only, wondering what is taking her so long. "I'm cooking for your lazy big ass."
"You love that ass, so shut up, you damn brat," I shoot back at her with a good statement that she cannot deny, and her soft laughter reaches my ears to put a smile on my face. "I do."
"You didn't have to cook though," I stand and leave the table, not liking to know her alone in the kitchen because of me. "Let me do it," I stick my body to the back of hers while she is cooking the fried eggs like I love them. "It's almost done."
"Thank you, my baby," I press a grateful kiss on her jawline, and her lips express her emotions that must have run through her veins because of this touch. "You're welcome, my man."
I smile and back hug her to not let her do this on her own. "Don't eat all the chicken while we're here, got it?!" I shout at Hojun who is, for sure, gulping the food down. "I'm the only one here, so it's mine now."
"Oh, really?" I slide one hand over y/n's stomach to hold her by the hips while speaking to a wall. "You do know that we're both alone here, with your chocolate milk in the fridge, that means it—"
"I was joking," he peeks over the door after making some abrupt noise in the living room, and I scoff. "That's what I thought, baby. Now get your ass back on the chair and leave some food for our girl."
"It's mommy," he corrects my sentence with the nickname he loves to give her occasionally. "Sure. Leave some for mommy, little boy," I feed his kinky side to please him, but at the sound of this, y/n quietly giggles in my arms.
"Stop doing that," I drop my lips on her sensitive neck and tighten my hold around her body, beaming at her features and how adorable they are. "What?" she turns the induction plate off and lays the eggs on the slice of bread, but draw my lips closer to her ear and murmur into it. "You make my heart weak when you laugh like that."
"You make my entire body weak without even doing anything," she compares two different things, trying to compete with my feelings and the effect she has on me. If only she knew what she does to me. "Hm. I didn't know that," I do not take my eyes off of her, staring at her and spoiling myself with the bliss she unknowingly offers me. "Now you know."
I smile like a dumb boy, but once she puts the pan down, I squeeze her in my embrace to feel her curves get crushed against me, and I plant a kiss on her ear. "I love you," I move my eyes up to hers, and once she turns around to gaze into them, I fall in love again. "I love you too," she returns the hug, filling me with love and care. "And look," she grabs hold of the dish to lift it up to me. "I cooked this with love."
"Thank you, I'll eat this with love," I cannot help being cheesy, but she giggles and walks towards the door, so I stop her. "Wait. I wanna say something important because you know, I'm kinda relieved about the fact that you didn't faint last n—" a hit in my abdomen provokes a groan to leave me. "I hate you now," she angrily flees away to go back to Hojun while I am laughing.
"Don't say that!" I follow her from very close and hurry to sit down by her side. "When I hear those words in your mouth, it feels like someone snatched my heart out of my chest, threw it into a wall, then violently slammed it back in my chest."
"That never happened to you, so how can you know how that feels?" she does not show any empathy, so I internally cry and look at my food. "Wow...thanks for comforting me, baby."
"What a dramatic guy," Hojun chews but smirks at me. "Do not ever expect to get a hug or kiss from me, alright?" I stare at him, threatening him with something I know I will never do. "I...I didn't mean what I said, I was joking again," he rises from his chair to come up to me and try to sit on my lap, but I push him away and grab my egg sandwich.
"Ya!" he passes one leg over my right one to stick it between both of mine, and he presses multiple kisses on my lips between every little word he wants to use to apologize and make me give in. "Please. Daddy."
I crack up and lean back, getting one hand away from my food to pull it back. "I'm not succumbing, just feeling pity. Don't think you have that power over me," I explain myself to erase the weakness I showed, and he smiles but sits on my thigh. "I love you," he wraps his arms around my neck and asks for a kiss with his soft ones.
"Hm," I do not do it, devoting more attention to the sandwich that my precious girl cooked for me than him. "Come on..." he cups my jaw with his small hand, and he applies pressure on my cheeks for my lips to be pursed, and he touches them with his. "There. I got it."
I grin but kiss him back. "Let me eat now, it's gonna be cold and y/n took time to do it just for me."
"True," she comments, and Hojun stands up to get back on his chair. Now that I can use my hands, I eat the delicious food and enjoy this morning with my two babies.
— Next day —
Friday, December 31st, 2021.
9 am.
"Kook..." Hojun pronounces my name in a sleepy voice, never handling the effect that the morning has on his body and mind. "Hm?" I check the clothes I have in the closet to find what I will wear for today. Since we are going to the Lighting Festival at The Garden of Morning Calm, but that it is snowing, I need to wear something warm. "Are we going to watch the fireworks at midnight?"
"Yeah, why?" I turn around to face him, who is sitting down at the bottom of the bed and following each of my moves with his brown eyes. "I can't wait," his enthusiasm draws its effect with his features, and I smile at his reaction.
I am happy and so excited about today's plan, but I prepared something that both of them do not know about, and I am nervous, almost freaked out. I have been keeping this secret, surprise to myself, and the day has finally come.
"It will remind me of when we saw this year's ones together, it was cold as hell, we were freezing, but it was worth it," I bring this up, loving to recall those memories we made. "Yes, I couldn't feel my feet anymore."
"Don't worry, this time, we have a car," I reassure him, knowing this will be much more comfortable for the both of us. "It's way better," he nods but glances down at my bare torso, so I smile but cover his eyes. "I know you like it but stop staring," I walk away to open the door. "Where are you going?"
"I'm gonna work out, I'll pick my clothes after showering," I step out of the room but hear him follow. "Where? There's not space."
"I'm gonna get the mattress up against the wall, it's easy to put it back, and we'll leave the house after getting ready and having breakfast anyway," I move towards it and do as said. "Damn. I'm barely able to move my legs and walk, but you're gonna work out," he does understand my sort of obsessions, feeling the need to do it so that I can feel better afterward, both physically and mentally.
"It wakes me up," I place the pillows on the table just on my left, but he sits down on one of the chairs and just watches me. Y/n is still showering and putting makeup on, so I have time to do this. I get down on the floor to be on my knees, and I bend over to do some push-ups.
I count each one of them that I do, going slowly at first to get used to it, and I do not even feel bothered by Hojun keeping his eyes on me and not doing anything else. I am used to it, when we were going to the gym together, he would often give up and end up watching me do all the job.
•••
11:30 am.
"Jungkook," y/n, who stepped out of the kitchen, gets me to stop what I am doing. "When are you gonna be done? The breakfast's soon ready," she tells me. "Now," I pant for air but answer her, feeling drained after this long workout. I get up on my feet and get hold of the towel Hojun brought me earlier.
"You can continue if you want, but we'd like to eat with you," she makes sure to add so that I do not feel forced. "I know, baby," I wipe the sweat off my chest, and I make eye contact with her before getting in the restroom for a shower.
'YOUR P.O.V'
I walk back to the food as Hojun looked up at me after Jungkook left, and he joins me in the kitchen. "This guy is crazy..." he sighs but comes closer, and he leans back on the counter to be within sight. "I know, right? I'm pretty sure he's going to be exhausted for the whole day."
"Probably," he believes the same as I do, and I smile at him. "You enjoyed the show though."
"Well," he becomes shy at the sound of this remark that was meant to tease him, and he averts his eyes from mine. "I was just making sure that he had someone if he needed help...sometimes...a cramp can happen, you know."
"Hm, of course," I scoff at his lame excuse that he did not even try to make plausible, but he avoids this topic, he beams like a baby and sticks his body to mine to wrap his arms around my waist and press his body against the back of mine. "It's hot when he works out like that...you can't blame me," he whispers, not having enough confidence to say it aloud. "I understand you, don't worry. We'll keep it to ourselves."
He softly titters in my ear, causing my body to feel soft and calm. I love the sound of his cute laughter, it is soothing and contagious, like a baby's one. I do not say anything anymore but take care of the food and turn the induction plate off to put an end to the cooking, and I turn around to look at him, but he leans in and presses a tender kiss on my lips.
A smile instantly grows on my face, and I cup his face. "Jungkook and I talked about our first time together. He mentioned the fact that you said it was painful and that you both wouldn't do it again, is that true?"
"Hm, yeah," he nods to me. "Did he tell you something else? Is he disappointed?"
"No, he's not," I reassure him with the truth. "He was just really worried about you because he thought that he ruined your first time with us and that he was not as good as you must have expected him to be. I made sure he wouldn't think such a thing anymore."
"He didn't ruin it at all. I'm just annoyed by the fact that I can't do it with him because I can't handle the pain. I don't know if it was just me because I was nervous about not making you feel good, which caused some tension in my body, I don't know, but it hurt me so much that I'm scared to try again."
"Hey, there's no need to be nervous about how I feel. I'll always feel good no matter what, the only thing you have to do is just listen, care about your partner's feelings without forgetting yours, but also let them guide you if you're unsure. You just need to learn, you cannot be know anything when you only experienced it for the first time, so don't be worried. The intimacy and passion of that moment that we share between lovers is the most important, and you made me feel good."
"I'll try to," he understands what I mean, and his features soften his expression. "Do you know how Jungkook felt though? I didn't dare ask him."
"He liked it, it was a first for him as well, but when he saw that you were in pain, he didn't want to keep going at all," I tell him all the things I heard from Jungkook, and which I know he would not mind him to know. "Was he liked that on your first time?"
"What do you mean?" I drift my hands down his torso, but he glances away. "You know, I know him for so long, but he was so different from the Jungkook I see all the time, but not in a bad way. He was just...it was a side of him that I never saw, and he was...so gentle, the way he was touching me, how he sounded, the words he was saying, that felt so amazing."
"He was like that, yes. He was turned on, that's how he acts when he is, but to be honest, he's such an amazing boyfriend because it's hard to find a boy who cares about your pleasure and not his only, who will care about how you feel while having sex, who will take time to make sure you climax too, and he can be so sweet but rough when needed, this is the perfect type of boyfriend you want."
"I thought I was the only one to feel like that," he grins but seems much more bashful about this topic. "Did you really enjoy it?" I ask him, willing to hear the answer from his mouth. He chuckles but speaks in a quieter voice full of coyness. "The butterflies never left my stomach and chest. I'm not even kidding. Doing it to you felt amazing, and I'll never forget how it made me feel, but feeling Jungkook inside me and hearing, like," he runs his fingers through his hair, not being as straightforward as usual. "When he was panting, gripping onto me, and the way he was using his hips or telling me what to do to you, when I could hear him sexually feel good because of me, my inside was going so damn crazy, I thought I would collapse or something because of how weak it made me," he unknowingly reminds me of my first time with Jungkook that felt the best ever but which also caused some embarrassment.
"It makes me happy to know that you felt like that," I wrap my arms around his waist to embrace his body. "Jungkook would be relieved to hear that."
"I wish I could do it again with him though, if he liked it, I'd have been able to make him feel good too, but I don't know, I'll see after some time," he expresses more disappointment regarding Jungkook's point of view on this than his own one, being the usual boy he is, who cares more about other than himself. "And have you thought about you being the dom?"
"No," he replies, quickly. "I only want to be a sub for him unless this is for oral sex or that stuff. Why do you ask? Has he said something about it?"
"Well," I do not know if I am the one who should say it, but since I cannot lie or keep it to myself because this is unnecessary, I let it out. "We talked about it, and he said that he'd be down to try it. He doesn't mind being the sub, but if you don't want to, he won't want it either."
"Oh," he shows some surprise, making me believe he must not have expected Jungkook to say this. "Then...I don't think the same way anymore," he titters, suddenly changing his mind. "I want to try that now, but what are you going to do while we're both doing it? You can't get any pleasure."
"You just do it together, it's okay," I do not go against it. As I said already, they can have intimate moments only together. I do not have to always be there. "But...I like it when you're with us. It feels more..." he does not find the word to end his sentence, and his eyes gaze down at my lips, his hands stroking my back. "More complete. I don't know."
"I can buy a strap and try to find a size that wouldn't cause you pain if you want, but I don't know if the size is the problem, or if you're too nervous to let go and loosen up," I give an option, not obliging him to pick a certain one. "Maybe it could help me get used to it so that, in the future, I'll be able to do it with Jungkook."
"Yeah, it could work," I nod but hear a door get opened in the living room. "Let's talk about this another time," he turns into a shy baby, so I agree to this and kiss his lips, before turning around to grab the dishes now that Jungkook is back.
•••
9 pm.
"Here are the churros," I walk towards Jungkook and Hojun who were waiting for me to come back with the food and drink. So I hand one small packet to Jungkook, who is the only one who wanted to eat. "Thanks, babe," he bites into the warm fried dough, and I do so but sip on the warm chocolate I bought.
"Do you want some?" I bring it up to the tall boy's mouth, and he traps the straw between his lips to drink, and I see Hojun move behind Jungkook to give him a back hug without saying anything but probably trying to seek some warmth.
Watching all those amazing and beautiful lights is so enjoyable, but the cold makes it hard.
For some reason, once Jungkook pulls away to not drink anymore, he grabs one of Hojun's wrists and gets them away in a gentle manner. "Don't do that."
I fix my eyes on him but check on Hojun's reaction, wondering why he is suddenly pushing him away. Hojun gazes up at him, hugging his own body, surely because of some discomfort. "Why...?"
"I don't like it," he chews on his warm snack, his breathing turning into vapor once it meets the cold air.
He did not just say that. He must be teasing him.
I look at Hojun, hoping for him to not take it seriously. He does not glance away from him as if he was hurt, but Jungkook turns his head and makes eye contact. "What?" he puts one churro in his mouth while maintaining this connection between them. "If you wanna hug me, you don't do it from behind," he seizes his arm and wrenches him towards him to envelop his smaller figure with his arms. "You do it from the front because I wanna hold you too, so that's unfair."
Hojun punches him hard in the guts and provokes a cough to leave his mouth. "I fucking hate you! Why would you do that?!"
"Because I love you and like to tease you, my baby," he presses a comforting kiss on his head and holds him tight. "I was about to cry, it's not cute or funny, you dick."
"If I'm a dick, you love me, am I wrong?" he giggles but dares to say such words when many kids are around with their parents in this park. "No, you're an ugly and small one."
"Wow. You're so mean. Why do you shame small ones? Uh? They're cute," he lowers the volume, but I let them have their guy argument. "I don't care, you're an ugly one," he throws a hit in his chest with both of his arms but still ends in his clasp, and Jungkook softly responds to this by tangling his fingers in his fluffy, light brown hair, and kissing him on the lips. "I love you."
"I love you too, but hate you at the same time," he grumbles in his chest, but Jungkook smiles, and I cannot help doing so.
10 minutes later...
"Wait, let's go there, the pink and red lights are better," Jungkook leads us to another spot, so we both follow, holding each other's cold hands. "Let's take a break," he fools us and uses the bench to sit down on it, but Hojun agrees to this idea and gets by his side right away.
"Come here," Jungkook pats his lap, knowing there is no space for me since it is made for two people only, so I sit down on his thick thighs. "Ugh..." he wraps his arms around me. "I'm so exhausted."
"We knew it," I roll my eyes. "You shouldn't have worked out this morning."
"I know," he leans forth to rest his head on my arm, and Hojun sets his eyes on him. "That's the price you have to pay to get those muscles, which will make you bigger, and which will let me have the best spot on y/n forever."
"Don't even start a fight about this," he changes the tone of his voice and lands his tough hand on his skinny thigh. No way they are back to arguing about who gets to use my chest and thighs as a pillow. "What if I do?"
"You're gonna regret it tonight," he smiles, in a smug manner. "When you'll be asleep and that I'll be cuddling her with my head on the best pillow ever that you won't ever have anymore, is that it?"
"I'm gonna smack your ass, little shit," he cups his chin and directs his face in another direction. "Yes, please," he never lets him threaten him but only takes an opportunity and good thing. At this point, he should know that those types of threats will only motivate him to provoke him even more.
'JUNGKOOK'S P.O.V'
I do not complain about the way he constantly shoots back, loving when he does it since this is the him that I know, and that when he does not behave that way, it means something is wrong.
"Whatever, we'll see what I do to you tonight," I give a squeeze to his thigh but put my arms around y/n to stand up, and I get her on my spot. "Alright, let's stop the jokes and be serious for a minute," I nervously stand before them both, a sudden current full of fears rushing through my veins at the speed of life. They both raise their head up and focus on me, silently, wondering for sure what I am doing.
"Uhm...Both close your eyes," I fiddle with the items in my pockets, these two ones that have been keeping them hidden for a whole week. "Why?" Hojun questions my intent, so I sigh and tap my foot on the floor. "Just listen and do it."
"We trust your dumb ass, so don't do something stupid," he eventually obeys and shut his eyes, then y/n follows.
I need to take a deep breath before going for it. I am pretty anxious, but at the same time, not really.
"Keep your eyes closed until I tell you to open them," I hold the three items in my hands, waiting to be certain they are not lying. "Alright," y/n covers her eyes so that I do not suspect her of looking through a small gap.
I step forth and put a small box on their lap, and I retreat to hold my own one. "You can open," I gulp down and glance at them both, their eyelids allowing them to see what is around, before them. They gaze down at what I left on them, and I toy with the one I have in my hands. I do not say anything but watch their reactions, a smile appears on their faces, and they grab the small boxes.
Their eyes have a glance at me. "Can we open it?" Hojun asks me, so I nod, and both of them check the inside without waiting anymore. As soon as they realize what jewelry it hides, they look at each other's rings to see if this is the same one, and their reactions send a certain wave of sweet and soothing warmth in my chest.
I nibble on my lips but speak out. "This is a promise ring, I picked the same one for us three, but y/n, you just have the female version of it," I explain, and they beam but put the ring on their engagement finger, so I take mine out, and I put it on, but they both stand up and hug me. "I love you so much," they both say nearly in synchronization. I smile but take them both in my arms. "Do you really like it?"
"Yes, it makes us one, and now, we're officially a throuple," Hojun looks down at his hand onto which the ring is, and the relief and bliss fill me to replace all the nervousness this surprise caused. "And it's a pretty one that you picked, I'm so happy. I didn't expect this at all, you never even talked about it or gave some hints," y/n touches the jewelry to twist it around her finger. "I bought them last week. I wanted us to have this because I feel like it connects us more, you know, and it means a lot to me."
"It means a lot to us too," she holds me against her, and she kisses me. "Let's make it an important day. This is our first day as an official throuple. On New Year's day, we're gonna celebrate it every year from now on," he already thinks about the future, making me feel soft for him again. "We will," I comb his hair back, and I pull him in to hug one another.
Every moment with them feels more soothing than I ever expected it to be. I was scared to be jealous most of the time, to feel left out, to unconsciously not give them the same amount of love equally, but since we started sharing this relationship together, I enjoy life even more, and I, for the first time, feel safe and loved without fearing to lose the ones that mean the world to me. I am happy with this life, and even if this has not been going on for a long time yet, I know we will make this work out no matter what. And regardless of what happens in the future, I know for sure that I will never regret the choices that were made.
I am genuinely so happy, like I never did before. This is special and something that not so many people can experience. Some have their assumptions, some do not believe in things they do not like, some do not want to accept or get to know about this only because society and some random people decided to set some rules and tell what is right or wrong, what a human is supposed to feel or not to feel, but I know from experience that no one knows anything more than the ones concerned.
Love is not just about a woman and a man. Love is about trust, consent, respect, devotion, and loyalty, and we, together, give each other that love, and certainly more than some couples that fit into society's expectations and standards. So I do not care about what people think of us, I am happy with this life, they are happy, and nothing else matters to me.
The end.
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